Lunchtime finally arrived. I hurried to the canteen, feeling a weight lift off my shoulders after finally submitting my report. I spotted Sean and Michael-our other classmate who had quickly become part of our little trio-waving me over.
They had already reserved a seat, and as I approached, they both beamed at me. It felt like coming home to two puppies waiting to be fed.
"Rain! What took you so long? I'm starving..." Sean said, his bottom lip pouting in a dramatic sulk.
"I'm here now," I laughed, setting the lunch boxes down. "But before you eat, bark for me first."
I was joking, but Sean actually let out a silly, eager bark. The three of us burst into laughter, the sound echoing through the crowded hall.
I didn't notice the table right next to ours until the laughter died down. It was Fran's group. I caught his eye for a split second, but as usual, he looked right through me, acting as if I were a total stranger.
"Oi, Rain, you should stop bringing food to this dog," Michael teased, digging into his own canteen meal. "You'll spoil him."
"You're just jealous," Sean shot back, leaning toward me with a playful grin. "Right, Baby?"
I lightly swatted the back of his head. "Don't call me that."
But our playful banter was cut short by the whispers from the next table. They weren't even trying to be quiet.
"Baby? Is that guy already dating someone?" one of Fran's friends whispered.
"Why? You interested?"
"Well, look at that face. He's definitely my type. And with that pale skin... I bet he'd look pretty flushing red in bed."
The crude comment hit me like a physical blow. I froze, my fork halfway to my mouth. But before I could even process the insult, the sound of a chair screeching against the floor startled the entire canteen.
Sean had stood up, his face dark with a fury I had never seen before. But what shocked me even more was the loud bang of a palm hitting wood. Fran had slammed his hand on his table and stood up at the exact same time.
The canteen went deathly silent. Every eye was on them. Sean looked ready to throw a punch, but Fran... Fran looked like he was ready to tear the room apart.
Michael quickly grabbed the hem of Sean's shirt, trying to pull him back down. "Sean, calm down," he hissed.
"What's wrong with you?" the guy who had made the comment asked, looking startled and defensive.
Fran didn't say a word to his friend. He didn't say a word to Sean. He shot one last, unreadable look at me-a look so sharp it made my breath hitch-and then he simply walked out.
Watching him leave felt like a punch to the gut. It reminded me of a time when we never needed anyone else's company but our own.
[Flashback]
After junior high, we moved to the city together for senior high school. Everything was peaceful then. Fran and I were inseparable-until Athena officially entered the picture. Once they started dating, I became the permanent third wheel.
I still cooked breakfast and dinner for him at our shared place, but at school, I tried to give them space.
"Fran, you should have lunch alone with Athy today," I suggested one afternoon. "I can manage on my own."
"No. What are you talking about?" Fran frowned. "We always have lunch together. You're being weird."
"I just mean... you're dating now. It looks strange if I'm always tagged along."
"It feels stranger if you're not there," Fran insisted, his tone final. "We've always been together; why are you trying to change that now?"
I couldn't argue with him when he looked at me like that. So, I sat there, day after day, watching them be sweet in front of me.
"I'll go get the drinks," Fran said, standing up. "What do you want, Rain?"
"Just a cola."
"And you, babe?"
"Lemon juice, please," Athena smiled.
As soon as Fran was out of earshot, I turned to her. "Athy, I'm really sorry for intruding like this. I know you probably want to be alone with him."
"Why would you say that? It's okay. I don't mind," she said, though her eyes were searching mine.
"But still..."
"Rain," she interrupted, her voice dropping. "It's good to see you. I think... we should just forget about the past, don't you? You're my friend, too."
My heart did a strange nervous flutter. Her words felt like a double-edged sword. She was being kind, but the mention of "the past" made me uneasy. I didn't want Fran to ever get the wrong idea about us.
"Ah... yeah," I managed a small smile.
Maybe she was just saying that to be polite. Maybe she was actually uncomfortable. But I didn't know how to say 'no' to Fran. I never did. And so, I stayed in that awkward, beautiful, painful circle.