Chapter 47 – The Long Road
The rain started before sunrise.
Not heavy.
Just enough to turn the road into mud and make the cold settle into everyone's clothes.
Brook hated it.
He had spent the last hour sitting beneath the remains of an old stone arch, watching the rain fall beyond the camp.
Henry was asleep beside the dying fire.
Sera had wrapped herself in a blanket and was trying to get another hour of sleep.
Elias was checking the horses.
Crowley was gone.
Again.
Brook pulled his hood over his head.
He looked down at his hand.
Three faint symbols rested beneath his skin.
He didn't touch them.
He didn't want to think about them.
Instead, he watched the rain.
A drop landed on the back of his hand.
For some reason, it reminded him of home.
Shinokuni-01 used to smell like rain.
He remembered that.
He remembered standing outside the barracks after training.
Mercer shouting at him for leaving his equipment out.
Henry laughing at him.
Sera complaining about the weather.
He remembered all of it.
But when he tried to remember how he had felt…
nothing came.
Brook's expression tightened.
He pulled his sleeve over his hand.
"Not now."
"Talking to yourself?"
Brook looked up.
Henry was awake.
"Apparently."
Henry rubbed his eyes.
"You've been doing that more."
Brook shrugged.
"Maybe I'm getting old."
Henry laughed.
"You're nineteen."
"Feels like fifty."
Henry looked at him for a moment.
"You okay?"
Brook nodded.
"Yeah."
Henry didn't respond.
Brook looked toward him.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Then why are you staring?"
"Because you're lying."
Brook smiled.
"You're getting better at that."
"At what?"
"Knowing when I'm lying."
Henry looked away.
"Someone has to."
The conversation ended there.
Neither pushed it further.
For once, Brook appreciated that.
They left shortly after.
The road stretched through thick woodland.
The rain eventually stopped, leaving the forest damp and quiet.
Brook walked beside Henry.
Sera and Elias traveled ahead.
Crowley eventually returned from somewhere in the trees.
Brook looked at him.
"Where were you?"
"Checking the road."
"Anything?"
"Nothing."
Brook nodded.
Crowley walked past him.
Henry waited until Crowley was ahead.
"He's weird."
Brook looked at him.
"You're only noticing now?"
Henry smiled.
"I mean unusually weird."
Brook laughed.
It was genuine.
For a few seconds, everything felt normal.
Then the laugh faded.
Brook didn't notice the difference.
Henry did.
Around midday, they reached a clearing.
There was an old roadside building there.
It had probably been a restaurant once.
The sign was barely readable.
THE LAST MILE.
Elias stopped.
"We should rest."
Henry looked at the building.
"Is it safe?"
"No."
Henry sighed.
"Good."
Brook laughed.
Sera looked at him.
"You actually think that's funny?"
"Maybe."
They entered.
The building was abandoned but mostly intact.
Tables remained where they had been left.
Dust covered the floor.
An old kitchen sat behind a counter.
Henry opened a cupboard.
"Nothing."
Sera checked another.
"Nothing."
Brook opened a drawer.
He found a spoon.
He held it up.
"Food."
Henry looked at him.
"You're an idiot."
Brook smiled.
"Yeah."
They eventually found a few old containers of preserved food.
Not much.
Enough for lunch.
They sat around one of the tables.
For the first time in days, they weren't running.
They weren't fighting.
Nobody was watching the horizon.
Nobody was talking about Sources.
They were just eating.
Henry looked at Brook.
"Remember when Mercer made us clean the entire training yard because you broke that practice weapon?"
Brook laughed.
"I didn't break it."
"You did."
"It was already damaged."
"You hit it."
"Exactly."
Sera shook her head.
"You two were terrible."
Henry pointed at her.
"You weren't better."
"I was better than both of you."
Brook looked at her.
"You set the training yard on fire."
"That happened once."
"Once was enough."
Sera smiled.
The four laughed.
Even Crowley smiled slightly.
Brook looked around the table.
For a moment, he felt something.
Warmth.
Belonging.
Then it faded.
He noticed.
His smile remained.
But something inside him had gone quiet again.
He lowered his eyes.
Nobody saw.
Or at least he hoped they didn't.
After lunch, Henry wandered outside.
Brook followed.
They stood beside the old building.
Henry leaned against the wall.
"You remember what I said yesterday?"
Brook nodded.
"About me not caring?"
"Yeah."
Henry looked uncomfortable.
"I shouldn't have said it like that."
Brook shrugged.
"You weren't wrong."
Henry looked at him.
Brook stared toward the forest.
"Sometimes I know I should feel something."
He paused.
"But I don't."
Henry didn't joke this time.
"Is it the Source?"
"Probably."
"Does it hurt?"
Brook thought about it.
"Not really."
"That's what scares me."
Brook looked at him.
Henry continued.
"If it hurt, you would know something was wrong."
Brook smiled faintly.
"You've become philosophical."
"Don't insult me."
Brook laughed.
Henry smiled.
Then his expression became serious.
"Promise me something."
"What?"
"If it gets worse…"
Henry looked directly at him.
"…tell us."
Brook didn't answer.
Henry waited.
Finally, Brook nodded.
"Okay."
It wasn't a promise.
Not really.
But Henry accepted it.
They traveled again before sunset.
The forest gradually opened into grassland.
The horizon became enormous.
Brook had never seen anything like it.
No Wall.
No towers.
No stone structures.
Just open land.
The sun was beginning to disappear.
Sera rode beside him.
"This is beautiful."
Brook nodded.
"Yeah."
"Do you think we'll ever get used to it?"
"Maybe."
Sera looked at him.
"You don't want to?"
"I don't know."
She smiled.
"You're terrible at answering questions."
"I know."
She leaned back.
"You know what I miss?"
"What?"
"The city."
Brook looked at her.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"People."
Brook smiled.
"There are people everywhere."
"Not the same ones."
She looked back.
"Sometimes I miss the people who annoyed me."
Brook laughed.
"That's oddly specific."
"You'd understand."
"Maybe."
Sera looked at him.
"You miss it too."
Brook didn't deny it.
"Sometimes."
That was the truth.
He missed Shinokuni-01.
More than he wanted to admit.
They camped near a small lake.
The water was perfectly still.
Henry cooked what little food they had left.
Sera tried to help.
Henry immediately told her to stop.
"You burn everything."
"I don't."
"You almost burned water."
"That was one time."
Brook laughed.
The conversation continued for nearly an hour.
Stories.
Arguments.
Small jokes.
Nothing important.
And somehow…
it mattered.
Brook sat beside the fire listening to them.
He realized something.
These people were becoming his home.
Not Shinokuni-01.
Not the Wall.
Them.
Henry.
Sera.
Crowley.
Even Elias, in his own way.
Brook stared at the fire.
He wondered what would happen if he lost them.
The thought came without emotion.
That scared him.
He looked at Henry.
At Sera.
At Crowley.
He wanted to feel afraid.
He wanted the thought to hurt.
Instead, there was only a distant understanding that losing them would be bad.
Brook looked down.
His hand slowly closed into a fist.
Three Sources.
Three pieces of something inside him.
He didn't know how much they had already taken.
He didn't know how much more they would take.
But he knew one thing.
He couldn't let the others see it.
Not yet.
Later that night, everyone went to sleep.
Brook remained awake.
He sat beside the lake.
The moon reflected across the water.
Crowley eventually appeared behind him.
"You should sleep."
Brook didn't turn.
"I'm not tired."
Crowley sat beside him.
For several minutes, neither spoke.
Then Crowley said:
"You're getting better at hiding it."
Brook looked at him.
"At what?"
Crowley looked at the lake.
"Exactly."
Brook smiled slightly.
"You knew?"
"I've known."
Brook looked down.
"Henry noticed."
"Of course he did."
"Sera?"
"Not yet."
Brook nodded.
"What about Elias?"
"He doesn't know you well enough."
Brook looked at Crowley.
"And you?"
Crowley remained quiet.
"I know what you're doing."
Brook frowned.
"What am I doing?"
"Trying to convince yourself that you're fine."
Brook looked back at the lake.
"I'm not."
Crowley didn't respond.
Brook continued.
"I don't know what's happening to me."
Crowley finally looked at him.
"That's the first honest thing you've said tonight."
Brook smiled faintly.
"Don't get used to it."
Crowley almost laughed.
Brook stared at the moon.
"Do you think I can stop it?"
Crowley took his time answering.
"I don't know."
Brook nodded.
"At least you're honest."
Crowley looked at him.
"But I do know something."
"What?"
"You still care."
Brook looked at him.
"How?"
"You wouldn't be afraid of losing your humanity if you had already lost it."
Brook said nothing.
Crowley stood.
"Get some sleep."
Brook nodded.
Crowley walked away.
Brook remained by the lake.
He looked at his reflection.
For a moment, it looked normal.
Then the third mark beneath his sleeve pulsed.
Brook closed his eyes.
When he opened them again, his reflection was normal.
He pulled his sleeve farther down.
Then returned to camp.
Nobody needed to know.
Not yet.
The road ahead was long.
There was time.
At least…
that's what Brook believed.
End of Chapter 47