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RAIS Pov
Defeat
Defeat, my Defeat, my solitude and my aloofness;
You are dearer to me than a thousand triumphs,
And sweeter to my heart than all world-glory.
Defeat, my Defeat, my self-knowledge and my defiance,
Through you I know that I am yet young and swift of foot
And not to be trapped by withering laurels.
And in you I have found aloneness
And the joy of being shunned and scorned.
Defeat, my Defeat, my shining sword and shield,
In your eyes I have read
That to be enthroned is to be enslaved,
And to be understood is to be leveled down,
And to be grasped is but to reach one's fullness
And like a ripe fruit to fall and be consumed.
Defeat, my Defeat, my bold companion,
You shall hear my songs and my cries and my silences,
And none but you shall speak to me of the beating of wings,
And urging of seas,
And of mountains that burn in the night,
And you alone shall climb my steep and rocky soul.
Defeat, my Defeat, my deathless courage,
You and I shall laugh together with the storm,
And together we shall dig graves for all that die in us,
And we shall stand in the sun with a will,
And we shall be dangerous.
Kahlil Gibran. "Defeat." Family Friend Poems, https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/defeat-by-kahlil-gibran
By Kahlil Gibran
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Marine is gone.
Lia was struggling to come to terms with the idea.
She now found herself alone at 20 years old, faced with her responsibilities.
Lia looked at Marine's grave, which was situated near those of her parents, hoping that she would not be alone wherever she was.
A tear escaped from Lia's eye. She did not want to break down just yet. She quickly wiped her tears and watched her son place bouquets of flowers on his grandparents' graves.
Lia raised her head to the sky and closed her eyes — she had to hold on a little longer, she told herself.
Just a little longer.
Mayeul came back to his mother's side and Lia took him in her arms.
Mayeul wrapped his legs around Lia's waist and continued to cry, his head hidden in the hollow of her neck.
Lia stroked her son's back and spoke gentle words to calm him.
~~~
That night
After putting Mayeul to bed, Lia stood in her room and closed her eyes. She began to concentrate on her surroundings and, detecting nothing, she opened her eyes on the roof of her house.
It was something she had grown accustomed to doing when she wanted peace and quiet.
She sat down and folded her legs close to her body and began to sob — no one could hear her cries except herself. She made sure of that before bursting into tears.
The more she tried not to cry, the more her tears escaped her eyes. She was now completely an orphan.
In front of her son, she tried to keep her composure, but she was so afraid of what the future held. And with the weight of responsibility on her shoulders, she knew that at some point she would have to fulfil her role.
And she hated that role so deeply — it was the cause of so much death — she could feel the burden of those responsibilities suffocating her.
She began to hyperventilate and tried to regain control of herself, but nothing worked. Nothing could help her stay grounded. The only solution that came to mind in her panic was to dig her nails into the palms of her hands, clenching her fists. She wanted to scratch herself, to hurt herself, to pull herself out of her trance-like state.
She wanted to scream, and thanks to what she had done earlier — isolating herself within a sort of transparent force field that prevented any sound from escaping — she did scream. She screamed with all her might, clenching her fists even tighter. Then she burst into tears again, completely.
She then felt an immense exhaustion wash over her. She began to yawn and her gaze drifted into the void. She was not thinking about much. She simply told herself that she was tired and that she wanted to sleep, but she could not bring herself to move just yet.
She felt that it would take an enormous effort to move — she needed a little rest before she could.
Her eyes grew heavier little by little. She understood she could wait no longer. She closed her eyes and when she opened them, she was in her room, on her bed.
The mental exhaustion combined with the physical fatigue that her power brought upon her weakened her completely. The moment her head touched her pillow, she fell asleep.
~~~
Several days later
Soldiers had suddenly appeared in Lia's village, demanding that every young boy gather together.
Some parents, having caught wind of their arrival a little earlier, had told their children aged 15 and over to go and hide somewhere no one could find them — to flee into the forest where no one would be able to track them down. They told their husbands to run far away and hide.
It was not cowardice towards their country; it was simply realism.
They knew just how cruel and bloody war was. Nothing had prepared them for the possibility of another war. And they no longer wished to fight without any valid reason — especially not when the reason was a king proclaiming himself emperor and promptly declaring war on three other kingdoms.
All the more so because, for them, this was not their war. It was a war between the powerful of the land, who, discontented, selfishly sent the people to be slaughtered in their place.
They had already suffered and were learning to heal — and now they were being destroyed all over again.
The village felt powerless, overwhelmed by events and by the greed of those in power. They also felt betrayed by their so-called emperor.
Some, unfortunately, were flushed out of hiding. Others decided not to leave — not to flee like 'cowards', but to defend their country. Unfortunately, every last one of that group would come to regret the chance they had had to flee and hide properly, a chance they had let slip through their fingers.
...
But Lia had not expected the flames to engulf her village.
And all she could do was stand there before that tragedy. Unable to make her body act. She collapsed to her knees, not hearing her son's screams beside her.
Tears of blood ran down her face and she crumbled. She was aware of what was happening around her — Mayeul's cries of worry and fear — but she truly could not control her body. She was as though trapped, a powerless witness to the burning of her entire life before her very eyes.
"It is not yet time. Go back to sleep." Said a strange voice, and she was forced into a deep, heavy slumber.
'No, Mayeul!'
...
The war between the Kingdom of Fahani and that of Rias was bloody — thousands of people had died, the vast majority from the Kingdom of Fahani.
The prince did not know how to remedy all these losses. The desire for power had pushed the kingdom into war, despite the disagreement of many.
The kingdom was at war once more, and he was the only one who could change things, the prince told himself.
...
A few hours earlier
"Captain! The chief is looking for you."
"Where is he, Rafael..." said the hooded knight.
"In the operations tent, Captain." Rafael watched his captain make his way toward their chief's tent.
Upon entering the tent, the captain found his chief standing before a table on which a map of the lands was spread out.
"Chief."
The chief straightened up and looked at the captain.
"Come forward, Maxim." The latter obliged.
"I have received a scroll from the k— well, from the Emperor. He is asking us not to get involved in the war. We must, however, infiltrate the Kingdom of Rias."
"The royal family of Rias keeps with them an object that the k— the Emperor covets. This scroll contains all the details of the mission. Take two of your best men. Do not forget to dispose of the scroll once you have memorised its contents. Leave now."
The captain bowed slightly, then raised his head to leave. 'That bad feeling again.'
...
{Dream}
"Carillia," said a voice that seemed to come from far away.
"Carillia, open your eyes." She finally heard the voice clearly and tried to open her eyes.
Her eyes flew wide open as she found herself in an ocean of light. She felt a brief flash of fear, then a warmth passed through her which calmed her, as though she were in her mother's arms.
"Where am I?" she said at last, having collected herself.
"And Mayeul?" she said, seized by panic once again.
"Your son is fine. He is safe."
"We are in the Brechu, a neutral place... unfortunately I cannot say much more," said the voice — a blend of several voices at once, yet with a hypnotic, soothing effect on one's very being.
"I have little time left, Carillia. The false god is searching for what must remain hidden. The moment he lays his hands upon it, everyone will be in danger... Prepare yourself for war."
Several horrifying images flashed through Lia's mind, jolting her awake.
She tried to catch her breath, her gaze unfocused. She knew there was a danger lurking, but she did not know exactly what.
"Ouch," she hissed in pain — her entire left forearm was as though on fire, burning from within. Then the pain faded as if nothing had happened.
She did not understand. She tried to use her power on her left arm, clenching her fist. Strange writing appeared along it. She released her fist.
"The false god is searching for what must remain hidden. The moment he lays his hands upon it, everyone will be in danger. His thirst for immortality will destroy everything in its path and a world of darkness will reign," she whispered.
She paused, lost in thought. "Find the lost knight who will be your greatest weakness?"
"I understand nothing of this gibberish."
She raised her head and realised she was in a place unknown to her — a sort of tent. Then the images of her village in flames and her feeling of helplessness came flooding back.
'Mayeul?'
Seized by panic once more, she got up and began calling her son's name.
"Mayeul!" She could not lose him. Not him. He was all she had left.