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(Word Count: 2,214)
With the diadem now in his care, it was nearing the time for the first period of classes. His new schedule for second year was a bit lighter in some ways than his first year. In their first year, they had at least two classes a day, with Thursdays having the extra flying class, and Mondays having four. With Harry's extra Divination classes, his Monday's were basically full from the start to end.
This year, they had four classes on Monday and Friday, with Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday each having one, two, and one class respectively. Not including the Astrology class, of course.
Monday had Transfiguration with Ravenclaw at 9, DADA with Slytherin at 10, and Herbology with Ravenclaw at 11. Then Lunch, then Potions with Ravenclaw again at 2:15. At the same time as Potions, was the fourth year Divination class, which Harry would be using the time turner to attend.
Tuesday had study hall all morning, then Charms with Ravenclaw at 2:15.
Wednesday, which was today, had DADA with Hufflepuff at 9, then study hall until lunch, then History of Magic with Slytherin at 2:15.
Thursday had morning study hall until lunch, with Harry's Divination being at 11, so he would have to have an extra long morning on Thursdays. Then Potions with Slytherins at 1:15, and Astrology with all four houses Thursday nights from 10 till 12 at night.
Then, like a cruel joke, Fridays started off with Charms with Slytherin at 9. It wasn't a problem for Harry, but other 12 year olds would struggle. At least last year the morning after Astrology was a study hall, so many of the students could catch up on sleep. There was an empty period between classes, then Transfiguration with Slytherins at 11. Lunch, then History of Magic with Slytherins at 1:15, and Herbology with Slytherins again at 2:15.
Harry frowned. Did they really only have one day time class with Hufflepuff this year? That didn't seem right. 'I bet Neville's upset about that,' Harry laughed to himself.
He made his way down the moving staircases, across a courtyard, and into the central hall building which led up to the Defense Against the Dark Arts room. He was a tad early, so he didn't bother to go in. Merlin knows he didn't want to spend the next twenty minutes suffering Lockhart's presence.
He sat down on one of the many hallway benches nearby and pulled out a book. It would be good to relax a little
Soon, Hermione showed up. She was always one of the first students to arrive at class, though Harry was usually accompanying her. When she saw him sitting there, she halted in confusion.
"Harry? What happened to the meeting with Dumbledore? Did he reschedule?" She asked.
"No, it was just pretty quick," Harry said smoothly.
She scrunched her face, "It can't have been that fast, you had only just left!"
Harry just grinned. "Well, I had plenty of time afterward." He stood up. "Come on, let's go in."
"I know that look, Harry, what did you do?" Hermione asked as they entered the classroom.
"I'll leave that for you to figure out. If you guess right, I can show you," Harry said.
Hermione moved to sit towards the front, but Harry stopped her. "I don't think you want to sit near the front in this class, Hermione," he whispered. "Sometimes Lockhart will call on students to reenact parts of his book. It'll be very embarrassing, trust me."
She looked conflicted for a moment, but nodded. They sat towards the back this time. In addition to that, Harry placed another Notice-Me-Not on both of them. His own charm was specifically targeted against Lockhart. He didn't want the man to try to have some sort of moment with him to use his fame to bolster his own reputation. Though he placed a weaker one on Hermione. If she raised her hand or called attention to herself, it would be easy for anyone to bypass it for her. He didn't want to ruin her classroom experience by making her unnoticeable to the teacher. Just enough so he didn't call on her if there was one of those reenactments today.
Though today was likely just the "quiz" that was about himself.
In fact, Harry planned to always have something like this on him. Just so he wouldn't have to deal with him at all with any of those random encounters in the hallway.
The rest of the class trickled in. Neville came in and sat on Harry's other side, opposite Hermione. Ron came in towards the start of class together with Seamus and Dean. The three of them waved at Harry, and sat in the row behind them.
"Hermione, you're actually joining us in the back? Are you okay?" Ron asked jokingly.
"I thought for sure you'd be just as love-stricken as the rest of the girls," Dean joined in.
"I am not love-stricken," She said a little too defensively. "Harry just wanted to sit in the back for this class, and I felt like joining him."
"Oh, yeah, that's right!" Ron's voice dropped to a whisper. "Harry, you said Lockhart's a fraud, right?"
Dean, Seamus, and Neville all leaned forward at the news. "No way, really?" Seamus said excitedly with a gleeful look on his face. "Hahaha, that's hilarious! Can you imagine the look on all of the girls' faces when they find out?"
Dean cackled, shooting a mischievous glance at all of the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor girls sitting at the front chatting away eagerly waiting for Professor Lockhart to show up. Susan being one of them.
'She's going to be so embarrassed about this later. Heh. The niece of the head of the DMLA herself, fawning over a criminal. Though…. Where's Hannah?' Harry thought.
Just as he thought that, Hannah appeared. She looked a bit bedraggled, like she had run all the way here. She waved to Neville and the rest of them, and sat down next to Susan.
Moments later, right as the bell rang to begin the classes, the door to Lockhart's office burst open with Lockhart making a grand entrance. He smiled wide at the class, and gestured to a large, winking portrait of himself. "Me," He said, pointing at it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award! But I don't talk about that, I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!" He introduced himself as he ponderously walked down the stairs.
He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly, some of the girls sighed dreamily.
"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books, well done," Lockhart continued, glancing over the stacks of his books on everyone's desks. "I thought we'd start today with a little quiz. Nothing to worry about! It's just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in."
When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said, "You have thirty minutes, starting now!"
Harry looked down at his paper and found the infamous self-aggrandizing questions.
What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color? What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition? What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?
There were three full pages, front and back, of similar questions, right up to:
When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?
Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them right in front of the class.
"Tut, tut! Hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac! I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully, I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non magic peoples, though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogden's Old Firewhisky!" He critiqued the class, though he gave them another roguish wink.
Ron was now staring at Lockhart with an expression of disbelief on his face. Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas, who were sitting in front, were shaking with silent laughter. "Blimey, Harry!" Dean whispered, straining to not laugh. "I think you were right! The man's gone bonkers!"
Hermione, on the other hand, had her eyes closed in dismay, and gave a start when Lockhart mentioned her name.
"… but Miss Hermione Granger knew my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair care potions, good girl! In fact," he flipped her paper over. "Full marks! Where is Miss Hermione Granger?"
Hermione raised a trembling hand.
"Excellent!" Lockhart beamed at her. "Quite excellent! Take ten points for Gryffindor! And so," he placed the stack of quizzes onto the desk, "to business!"
He bent down behind his desk and lifted a large, covered cage onto it. It was the cage of Cornish Pixies. Harry groaned to himself, his wand readied.
"Now, be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm," Lockhart warned dramatically. Harry had to admit that the man had a talent for theater.
Lockhart placed a hand on the cover. Dean and Seamus had stopped laughing now. Neville was cowering, sinking low into his chair next to Harry.
"I must ask you not to scream," said Lockhart in a low voice. "It might provoke them."
As the whole class held its breath, Lockhart whipped off the cover.
"Yes!" He said dramatically, "Freshly caught Cornish pixies!"
Seamus couldn't control himself, he let out a snort of laughter that even Lockhart couldn't mistake for a scream of terror.
"Yes?" He smiled at Seamus.
"Well, they're not very dangerous, are they?" Seamus choked out from behind his laughter.
"Don't be so sure," Lockhart said, waggling a finger annoyingly at Seamus. "Devilish tricky little blighters they can be!"
The pixies were bright electric blue and about eight inches high, with pointed faces and shrill voices. The moment the cover had been removed, they had started jabbering and rocketing around, rattling the bars and making bizarre faces at the people nearest them.
"Right, then," Lockhart said loudly. He moved to open the door to the cage when he suddenly stopped. He seemed to think better of it and instead simply patted the cage. "Who can tell me why it might be best to not underestimate them? Let's hear from one of you. Come on, don't be shy!"
'No way, is he actually going to try teaching something?' Harry put away his wand, pleased with the change. It seemed like his suggestion to avoid incidents with students and preserve his image carried over somewhat into his teaching as well. If the carry-over was enough to influence like this, then Harry could rest assured it would stick if the actual situation arose.
Hermione raised her hand.
"Ah, Miss Granger! Let's hear it then!"
After Hermione explained the common pitfalls in dealing with pixies, Lockhart went on to fumble through a small lesson on them. It was still chock-full of self-aggrandizing references towards himself and "his" adventures, but at least he hadn't started his reenactments yet.
As the lesson went on, Hermione was more and more dismayed. The lesson was shallow, barely breezing through the basics!
Even Professor Quirrell was better than this!
Harry didn't even need his legilimency to know that everyone else in the class thought the same. Their faces gave it away. Even the fangirls felt something was off. Though they weren't completely disillusioned just yet.
As class ended, Susan and Hannah came up to them.
"Hey, Neville!" Hannah greeted.
"H-hey, Hannah," Neville replied.
"Hey, guys!" Susan greeted everyone else.
"Hello, Susan, Hannah," Harry greeted.
"Hannah, I noticed you were nearly late before, but you're usually early like me. Are you okay?" Hermione asked.
Hannah blushed, "Oh, yeah, I accidentally slept in, that's all. "
"It probably didn't help that we stayed up late talking. I should have woken you up earlier, I'm sorry, Hannah," Susan looked at her guiltily.
"It's fine. I guess I was more tired than I thought last night. Besides, you did wake me up before you went to breakfast. If you hadn't done that I would have been late for sure!" Hannah said, cheering Susan back up.
Neville brought out some candy from his pocket and offered it to Hannah. "H-here, you missed breakfast, right? You can have this."
Hannah, who had just recovered from her earlier blush, blushed again. "Really? Thanks, I am a bit hungry." She accepted the candy gratefully.
Susan nudged Hannah. "Come on, we've got to get to Transfiguration! We do not want to be late for McGonagall's class!"
The two girls said their goodbyes and left to join the rest of the Hufflepuffs leaving class.
Harry and the rest of the Gryffindors went on to their study hall.