I don't want you to lose all traces from the trajectory of my life.
Actually, Zhang Zhentian clearly understands in his heart that if he misses this opportunity, he might completely lose the woman he loves the most. Yet he can't face everything. He has no reason to salvage it.
Ultimately, all of this boils down to his own mistakes. In the end, he hurt the woman he loves the most, and he himself abandoned her.
He knows very well that some mistakes, once made, cannot be remedied. And once some errors have become a foregone conclusion, no one will allow them to continue. He's very aware of this, which makes him even more pained. Clearly, his mistakes might not be the main reason, but he has to bear all the blame because if he wants his wife to view him differently, he must show the responsibility a man should have.
"Since we've come to this point, let's not say anything more and calmly say our final goodbye."
