Do you all think it's funny? Why would I choose to live like this? Why would I choose to tell you in this way, that I've reached the edge of love and pain repeatedly, that I've turned myself into someone different from others again and again, but what have I ultimately gained? I endure all the deep-seated pain within my heart, all I want is to be different from others, but in the end? I still endure all the agony!
I've thought about whether I should experience a life like yours, abandoning everything for freedom at all costs. I've thought time and time again what kind of end that life would bring me. I simply can't imagine, if I truly chose to do that, what my outcome would be now, something you've never thought about.
