Chapter 638 - 14

Dammit. "There's no 'paradise' to have trouble in."

Mina's grin widened just a little. "Is that so? Because I could have sworn yesterday that the two of you went off to do what Ochako here wants to do with Deku."

"Ah! I don't!" She waved her hands as if that would ward off accusations. "You've got it all wrong! We're just friends!"

"Uh huh, you keep telling yourself that. But don't tell him that." Mina pointed to Izuku, still 'napping' between me and Ida.

He only weighed as much as his clothes thanks to Ochako's power to... make things weightless? That didn't sound right...

"You wouldn't want to be responsible for breaking his nerdy little heart, would you?" Mina continued teasing Ochako.

"No!" She shook her head. "I mean. It wouldn't. He doesn't."

"Oh, it would, and he does. Look at your costume."

"What's wrong with my costume?" She looked down at her outfit. "I mean, I know it's more form fitting than what I wanted, maybe I should ask to have it changed..."

"Oh, it's perfect," Mina said. "You've got it, may as well flaunt it a little. But, compared to the it and amount of flaunting by, say, Yaoyorozu? Well, I like to think I've got something to flaunt, myself." She slapped her thigh for emphasis. "But compared to her, we come up a little plain, don't you think?"

Poor Ochaku, so dejected by the knowledge that she wasn't literally the hottest girl in the grade. "You don't have to be mean about it."

"I'm just saying that the entire time the other boys were drooling over all of us... Izuku only looked at you."

"I would like it known I wasn't drooling over anybody." Ida lifted his head. "And I don't appreciate insinuations otherwise."

"Well, Ida wasn't," Mina agreed. "Alex over here, however..."

"Yeah, I won't deny it." What? My classmates were hot. "I thought I was less obvious than that."

"You are better at hiding it than most," Mina said. "But a girl can feel when eyes are on her, it's like a secondary quirk for the fairer sex."

"I can't!" Ochako shouted.

"Which is sad, because if you could, you'd know Izuku is already picking out wedding rings in his mind."

"N-n-no, I mean, he couldn't be!"

"Bet you that's exactly what he's dreaming about ~right now~."

"She's right." Not about his current dreams, of course, but the sentiment. But I liked where Mina was going with this and wanted to be a part of it. "He's got it pretty bad."

These two were hopeless on their own. They'd keep dancing around each other for the whole of their time in school, and ten years later they'd both look back kicking themselves over the one that got away or some bullshit.

If any more blood rushed to Ochako's face, she'd give herself an aneurysm. "Do... do you really think so?"

"It's the one time guys are good at relationship stuff," I said. "Gotta keep an eye on the competition."

"I admit, while it's none of my business, I agree with these two," Ida added. "It's hard not to notice Midoriya's brilliant mind, or powerful quirk, or how he gets when you're around."

"Men," Mina sighed. "All you think about is how you measure up to other men. But, they're not wrong. It won't take long before everyone starts to notice, and girl, if you don't move quick, you're gonna have problems. Because you've got competition coming. If you keep pretending you're not interested... they'll be happy to push you out of the way. Izuku won't even know he broke your heart."

Fucking. Damn. "Uh... I'd like to repeat everything Mina just said."

Mina spun on me. "Good, and repeat it to Momo while you're at it. You've got half the girls in class looking at you like a slab of beef, and Momo is Momo. So be honest, is there really nothing? Will she be fine when some girl makes her play on you? Will you be okay when all the guys make their play on her?"

"Uh..."

"Exactly. You two need to sort your shit out before you break the hearts of half the people in this school."

"Point taken."

"Pardon me for asking," Ida said. "But I couldn't help but noticing you were much nicer in how you said it to Ochako than you were Alex."

"Because she's a turbo-virgin." Mina gestured to Ochako with her left thumb over her shoulder, then brought her hand down to point at me. "He doesn't have that excuse."

I raised my hands up as if to ward her off. I made sure we were alone and there weren't any nearby supersense quirks. "Okay, okay, if you really must know... we did make it official yesterday. But we're trying to keep it on the down-low in school. I trust you guys not to go around blabbing, so don't."

Mina's head tilted. "And... Momo's okay with this?"

"Her idea."

"Ugh... well, here's hoping she knows what she's doing."

"Don't worry, Momo's smarter than any of us."

-----

I might have overestimated Momo's intelligence. I went to the address given, within easy walking distance from my apartment. Which begged the question of how she knew where my apartment was. Oh well, I had a bit of a stalker for a girlfriend, that was fine.

It was a nice enough restaurant, not upscale but not a dive. More than suited for a couple of college kids trying to be as classy as their budget allowed. All well and good so far, right?

Well, then a black sedan pulled up and for a moment I was wondering if I wasn't about to be dragged to a black site for a conversation about All Might and Midoriya. But, no, it was only the familiar terror of a bodyguard that could drop me on a whim, and the butterflies of Momo in the back seat.

And then she got out of the vehicle.

She had blonde hair. A wig. It wasn't a cheap wig by any means, you'd need to be an expert to spot it as a fake.

Alone, that wasn't so bad. But she also... might have overdone the makeup. Just a tad. I could see her goal, to completely hide the contours of her face behind the blush, eye shadow, and lipstick.

Then, the outfit. I'm sure she went through some fashion catalogue to pick out something that was meant to appeal to 'college girls'. She picked something, all right. Skirt, high heels, low blouse. And totally wrong for this establishment.

Which she arrived at in a black sedan. With a scary looking monster of a man in black sunglasses driving.

In short: it looked like I was on a date with a prostitute. A fairly classy prostitute, mind, but a prostitute nonetheless.

Oh well, it could have been worse. She wasn't in fishnets, the clothes weren't shiny or red, and she didn't wear oversized sunglasses. Green contact lenses, but not glasses.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting, Dad wanted to talk to me about some stuff, he's going back to work in two days."

"Oh, I wasn't waiting that long. And I knew if anything was keeping you, it was important."

"Good." She wrapped her arm around mine and leaned against me. "I heard great things about this place, I'm excited to experience it for myself."

Well, if anyone thought her a prostitute by looking at her, they'd be entirely confused with her diction. "And I'm looking forward to a bit of the local culture. You know, without the filter of being the rich kids who are kept in a bubble."

"Kept in a bubble?"

She doesn't realize? Well, that was going to be interesting in the future. "We'll talk about that some other time, now's definitely the wrong time."

The restaurant was a cozy thing- dim, comfortable chandelier lights was welcomed over the harsh glare of florescent sterility of a fast food joint, but failed to be as unobtrusive as the hidden light of high class establishments.

The music was soft- a beautiful tune that I would guess from the neo-classical era of the turn of the millennia, one that blended Asian and Western music styles of the time. And, more important, nobody held royalties for. Played from speakers in the ceiling.

I could see why it was popular; it knew its place, in the background, allowing visitors to enjoy each other. As 'first date' spots, it was hard to picture better.

Or, in some cases, other meetings. A couple businessmen watched us go by, both giving Momo an appreciative gaze. I made sure to give them the 'you can look, but only I get to touch' smirk. While putting my arm around her back.

I don't think it worked that well. One smirked back. The other, the older one, I swear looked like he pitied me. Good to know I wasn't the only one who had opinions about Momo's look for the night.

If anyone else noticed, they didn't react. Most of the people here seemed inclined to keep to themselves, doing their best to make the time here count for something, rather than worry about random strangers.

Ordering was simple enough, with a minimalistic menu that had few options. "Uh, I don't think I've heard of any of these wines."

Of course she hadn't. The wine here was brands marketed to broke college kids and middle-aged housewives who liked to imagine they weren't alcoholics. "I think it's best to skip alcohol, anyway. We still have school to worry about."

"Of course, you're right."

A girl at the table next to us huffed in amusement.

We chatted for a while, mostly about nothing since the place wasn't quite the mood for deep and romantic, nor private enough to talk about school in any great detail. A little bit, like how excited we were and whatnot, but nothing specific.

"Oh, and I should thank you again for those toys you gave me," Momo added. "I didn't expect to use them in class the very next day."

A gasp from behind me.

"Heh, those guys never saw it coming."

And that was it, she started coughing.

"Oh, are you okay?" Momo asked, oblivious to the double entendre.

"I'm- cough- I'm fine. I breathed wrong, that's all."

Now that the woman used words, I could tell she was a fair bit older than us. Served the eavesdropper right. "And I'm just as happy with the toys you gave me. Kendo would have had me for sure if Toru didn't get the drop on her with those cuffs."

"Thanks. They're a favorite of mine, too. If you want, I can give you more."

"Oh, absolutely. Toru was also quite taken with them. In fact, I bet half the school would want them if you started giving them out. But then it's a matter of time before they're used on you."

"I guess I could do a few, but that's a lot of students." Momo continued not to realize what this conversation sounded like. "I'd exhaust myself pretty fast."

No sounds from behind us. Not a one. Not even breathing.

Sadly, I was out of plausible entendres to drop, especially when my verbal partner didn't recognize the game. And I found myself thinking, instead.

"Is something wrong?"

"No, not at all," I said. "I just realized I can't think of anything to talk about that isn't either school or family related. Or about our childhood, which I guess is the same thing."

There was a gasp. What did I just say that sounded dirty to her? Oh well, it hadly mattered.

"Yeah, it is kinda weird." Now Momo looked like I must have, pensive and lost in thought.

"Don't be that way, relationships change all the time," I said. "We had great childhoods together, and now my favorite little shadow is a beautiful young woman."

"Favorite?" She faux-glared at me. "How many other shadows did you have?"

"Uh... quite a few, to be honest. Mom and Dad were always dragging me from one event to another, expecting me to get along with the kids of whomever they were dealing with."

"Right." She thought back, smiled. "I should thank you for that, too. All those years, and you never once made me feel like I was a burden or obligation."

"Because you never were. You were always right there with me, ready to crawl into the thickets and fight imaginary villains with not-so-imaginary swords."

"And the others?"

"Let's just say if I had a sword, they'd have concussions."

"I seem to recall you could do that just fine with your bare hands." She might have been berating me, but she was smiling as she did so. "Couldn't go anywhere without you getting into a fight."

"You can't blame that on me, surely?"

She shook her head. "You seemed to be the common element. We'd go somewhere, you'd get into some argument with some boy, and then I'm the one who has to get help. What other suspect is there? I think I'd know if you had an evil twin."

"That would be Mom and Dad." I nodded, like it was all so obvious. "They kept putting me in rooms with customers in need of bare knuckle dental work."

Which was true, and Momo knew it. Most of them weren't 'Bakugo' levels of bad, but there were a lot of assholes out there in need of a good punching, and I... need to phrase that better in my head before saying it out loud.

"More like their fault for letting you get away with it."

She wasn't entirely wrong about that. "I know, I swear you lectured me more than they ever did."

"And patched up your bruises and cuts, too. Remember when you got in a fight with that one guy, Robert?"

"I remember him." Dude was a real sack of shit. "And I'd do it again. He literally kicked a puppy. Who even does that?" It wasn't the dog's fault he didn't watch where he was stepping and ended up with shit on his shoe.

"He was also ten years older than you."

"I don't see how that changes anything."

"He beat you unconscious."

"Yeah, then, but now he'd be pushing thirty. I bet he has a pot belly and I could fold him like the laundry. Maybe I should go pay him a beating."

"He's in prison."

That stopped me for a moment. "Can't say I'm surprised. What happened, and how did you know?"

"He ended up killing his girlfriend during an argument. I heard about it from my parents, that was about the time they hired Marco as my driver."

Marco? That can't possibly be his real name, can it? "Wow. That's messed up."

"And that's my point. He could have killed you, he clearly had it in him. You need to stop taking unnecessary risks."

Says the girl who wants to be a pro hero? "I know, but I don't think it's in my nature. Any more than it's in yours. I mean, how would you feel about me if I was the sort of person who could stand by and watch other people being hurt?"

"You're... not wrong." At least she could acknowledge the incongruity. "Sorry about bringing down the date such a heavy topic."

"First, heavy topics are part of life, and that's what we're here for. Second, I'm not so easily upset. Third, as far as I'm concerned, this date's a success thus far. Great company, gr- good food, and I haven't had to break any faces."

Don't you fucking dare, Murphy.

=====

A/N- Mina. The god-tier shipper. I didn't plan that scene to go that way (Mina was going to tease Ochako less, and Alex more), but one of the most powerful lessons I've learned as a writer is when a character says 'step back, I got this', I should step back.

It was at exactly 298% better than what I'd initially planned.

Incidentally, Asui's going to get a similar moment (and equally not part of the original plan) in the next chapter or two. It's already half-formed in my brain. And it's amazing.

The rest of the date went fine, better than fine. We had changed, yes, and we would still be exploring that for months, but at the core we were still the same people. Older, smarter, better suited to understanding the nuances we failed to see in one another before, but what drew us together (as more than just the people my parents make me pretend to tolerate) was still there.

But, in the end, it was a 'proper' date and after a quick kiss at the end, Momo got in the vehicle with her bodyguard while I walked home. And aside from what looked to be an actual prostitute making eyes at some balding businessman twice her age, there wasn't a single crime to be seen.

I ignored it. I wasn't even here to be a hero, let alone some moral busybody. If I hadn't hated moral busybodies already, school the next day would have done it.

I came to school to girls whispering and giggling to each other in the halls. 'Did you hear' this and 'so scandalous' that. Only for them all to go silent whenever I got too close.

The worst of it was when I saw Momo, her eyes red and puffy.

Murphy, you son of a bitch.

I walked up to her, giving a quick glare at one too-interested passerby. "Momo? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Now, normally, when women say that, it means the exact opposite. But Momo wasn't that type as a kid, and I didn't think she was now. Also, she sounded like she meant it. "If you're sure, but you look like you've been crying."

"Oh, that?" She rubbed her eyes. "Let's just say I'm never using contacts again."

I relaxed. Inconvenient as that was, there wasn't much for me to do about it. "You want me to get some eyedrops, or have you studied those as well?"

"No, I have some. Though I try not to replicate medicines... too many risks," she said. "And I may be half blind, but I saw that look. Who were you planning to punch a moment ago?"

The problem with dating someone you've known for years, is that she's known you for years, really made hiding things a pain in the ass. "Well, ever since I got to school, all the girls seemed to be whispering behind my back. And then I thought you were crying, so... hey, at least I checked, right?"

"Oh, that's about Uraraka and Midoriya. It seems she was caught sneaking out of his dorm this morning."

Oh. Ohhh. No wonder they didn't want to share with me.

"You don't seem surprised." Momo wasn't as close to them as I was, so it was as much a request for detail as a statement.

"A little, but not really. Mina went ham on them yesterday about their whole dancing around each other thing. But I didn't think Ochako would be that bold. I'm for it, though, the two of them seem great for each other."

She nodded, accepting my opinion on the topic. "We should get to class, before more rumors start."

"Right."

Class... was a sad sight to behold, with Ochako and Izuku looking absolutely miserable in their corners, while various classmates seemed delighted in their suffering.

This was one of the gen-ed classes, a business-economics class that was more or less a prerequisite no matter what education path you were pursuing. And I swear, they were just delighted that illustrious hero candidates were at the center of a scandal.

Momo probably had a point.

"C'mon, man, you should be proud." Said the guy leaning over Izuku's desk. "If I managed to tap that on the first week, I'd be sing-urk!"

I had slammed my hand down on his shoulder. "Why, hello there." I squeezed enough to let him know I could squeeze more. "You must be a friend of Izuku's, huh?"

At least he wasn't completely stupid. He still knew fear. "Uh.... yes?"

"So am I. How about we introduce ourselves? I'm Alex."

I reached out with my other hand, for a handshake. He took it. And now I was squeezing that, too.

"A pleasure to meet you." He didn't give his name, I pretended not to notice. "I'm sure Izuku's told you all about how I broke a guy's ribs on the first day because he wouldn't stop running his mouth."

"I... may have heard about that."

"I know you have. Everyone has." My fake grin widened a little. "But not from Izuku. He's a good friend. He'd never brag about his buddy being the second strongest guy in the class. He minds his own business, doesn't talk about his friends behind their backs."

"I- I wasn't saying anything bad about him-"

"Oh, did Izuku not tell you?" I leaned in close. "Ochako is my friend, too."

I hoped I didn't just make her reputation worse. Some of these idiots might interpret me saying we were friends as 'friends'. As C.S. Lewis said: those who cannot concieve Friendship as substantive love, but only as a disguise or elaboration of Eros, betray the fact that they have never had a Friend.

But that was a concern for later. For now, I was putting the fear of God into this asshole.

"I also bet Izuku never mentioned how, strong as I am, I'm nothing compared to first place."

"You're not?"

If he hoped he could find someone to hide behind... well... "No, Izuku wouldn't brag about himself, either. But, between friends? If we fought, it wouldn't be a fight. He would punch me, and I would die."

"I-I wouldn't!" Izuku mutter-shouted.

"I know you wouldn't, you're a good guy like that. Me, I'm the guy who breaks the ribs of people who annoy me. Tell me, who do you think's the better friend?"

I might be enjoying this too much. His answer was not words, merely the wide-eyed stare of a deer about to have a close encounter with some headlights. All answers were the wrong one, and he knew it.

"Oh, wow, are you really that strong?"

Also, a new distraction appeared. One that was female, blonde and beautiful and an obvious foreigner to boot. I might still have threatened her- I was a firm believer in gender equality, and quirks levelled a lot of the old playing fields.

Unfortunately, she had chosen an alien battlefield which men could not tread. One of smiles, cleavage, and flattery. Well, most men, there was this guy I knew in high school who could out-bitch the best of them, but I digress. Which I do when I'm losing.

"Such a cutie, too. And so polite. I just love how polite Japanese men are. Nothing like where I'm from."

If I had to guess, she was Slavik, though trying to pin a specific foreign accent through the Japanese filter was beyond my skillset. If she was speaking English, I'd figure it out.

"And I don't believe rumors for a second," she lied with practiced ease. "I know how these things go, and that poor girl keeps saying they've got it all wrong, just like you. So I believe you, even if I wouldn't blame either of you. I know I'd be all over a guy like you if he made one, teensy, little move."

At least there was no threat of that happening. Izuku had about as much chance of making a move as I had of I had of becoming the Queen of England.

"Or, not even a move," she continued, moving just a little closer. "All he'd have to do is not tell me to stop."

Fuck!

Izuku made a better deer-in-headlights than my victim. Who, I noted, had exploited this girl's distraction to get free from my grip and flee to the far end of the room. Where I'm sure he would warn everyone about Izuku's violent friend. I won the battle of the boys.

Then clapping started. Took me a moment to realize Asui, the frog girl from the hero class, was the source of the sound. "Wow. And I thought I had no shame. You take gold-digger to levels I can only look upon with awe."

Blondie looked up, opting to take offense as a defense. "Excuse me?"

"Very well, you are excused. Door's right there."

I liked this girl, she reminded me of my mother. Not that kind of like, Sigmund.

"No, I mean, you insulted me."

"Good. That was my intent." She made a sound in her throat that fell somewhere between a croak and a growl. "Can't say I much appreciate it when some common skank slithers onto my best friend's man."

Best friend? News to me. She didn't look like she was lying, but her heteromorph features fucked with my admittedly mediocre cold reading. The too-large eyes and near nonexistent facial micro-expressions were nigh impossible to read. Izuku was more obvious, and it was news to him, too.

"But, those are just rumors, right?" Blondie grinned, playing the 'dumb' role. Which wasn't true, there was a great deal of intelligence in the way she changed her body language for the role at hand.

Asui rolled her eyes. "The rumors of some random hookup are a load of hot trash, but those two have been together for years. They met at some nerd camp for nerds back in middle-school, and been inseparable ever since. Kinda annoying, to be honest."

Damn, she's good. She was reframing the whole event one stage at a time. Denial wasn't going to work, but as a long-standing relationship with years of history... that took it from 'scandalous' to 'only natural'.

All while making herself a sort of audience stand-in who was even a little jealous of the situation.

I could learn some things from this woman.

"I told them they wouldn't be able to hide it a week." Not privy to my thoughts, Asui continued her rant. "But why would they listen to me? I'm the one playing third wheel whenever they're in a room together."

Meanwhle, I looked around at the rest of the hero class in the room. They were the ones that could destroy this lie with a word. Most of them seemed to be of my opinion that Asui was the hero of the hour.

Even Bakugo, for whatever reason, didn't say a thing. Then, maybe he thought she was telling the truth. Or, more likely, didn't care. If there was one thing I could respect about him, it was that he didn't shy away about making his opinions clear himself.

Blondie, however... "They both seemed pretty insistent..."

"Of course they did. They're shy like that." Asui shook her head. "Can't say I relate, but believe it or not, they used to be so much worse. I'm half convinced they didn't even talk at that camp. Just sat there staring at one another for two weeks, and took it as proof they were soul mates."

She shrugged. "But to be fair? Those two? It probably is. Now kindly crawl back into your hole. If you ask nice, I might be able to dig up some rich loser who'd be interested in renting it from you."

Well, alrighty then. Aaron, you have a challenger for title of Queen of the Bitches.

Blondie looked around, even looked at me for a moment. I gave her the eyebrow. I wasn't as good at is as Momo, but 'why are you still here' is an easy message.

So she kindly retreated to her place, and the worst of the muttered conversation died out. It wouldn't go away entirely, not until something crazy happened, but for now Blondie, Tsuyu, and I were a much more interesting topic of conversation. And what little still came their way was girls asking how it was to have Midoriya as a boyfriend.

A much more tolerable state of affairs that got us to lunch in relative peace.

"I should probably sit here as well," Tsuyu said as she approached our table. "Keep up the lie, you know?"

"N-no, it's no trouble at all!" Izuku insisted. "In fact, we'd be honored to have you!"

"Yeah! You were great, Asui! I wish I had half your confidence!" Ochako jumped to agree.

"Your praise and undying gratitude are all the reward I need." Tsuyu took a spot. "But call me Tsuyu. Wouldn't want people catching on."

"I must admit," Ida said. "You were masterful back there, and you too, Alex. As much as it pains me to admit, I could do nothing but watch." Ida took this shit way too seriously.

"Hey, all I did was threaten people. Asui was the MVP this game."

She croaked, which I took to be a sound of dismissal. "Let's call it a team effort. You were dealing with the guy when I got there. And it have made the girl one all the more difficult without you already there."

"I'll take credit for the assist, then." It was easier to share credit than to make someone accept it who didn't want to.

"Yes, but you also put your reputation at risk," Ida said. "Alex is known delinquent, but you..."

I am not- no, I might actually be a delinquent. Something to tell the kids some day.

Asui croaked her dismissal again. "I wasn't lying when I called myself shameless. As I see it, shame is reserved for when you do something to be ashamed of. I did the right thing, and I'm nothing but proud of it."

"Well said!" Ida nodded in agreement.

"But if you could alleviate my curiosity, what did happen to lead to you leaving a boy's bedroom this morning?"

Poor Ochako, couldn't catch a break. "Ah, well, you see..."

"I was... sick yesterday, and she stayed behind to look after me," Izuku said.

Tsuyu tapped her cheek with her finger. "I see, I remember seeing that. Ida, you were there, and you as well."

I was, until I bailed for a hot date. "We kinda left after getting Izuku to bed. Ochako said she'd stay behind to make sure he was okay. I thought it'd only take a few more minutes and he'd be fine. How long were you under?"

Izuku's head ducked down, as if he was expecitng to be berrated. "Ah- uh- five hours?"

Five hours? What were they doing, having a congressional hearing?

I was still figuring out what to say when the alarms blared, letting us know the school was now on lockdown.

Well, at least this should be the death of those stupid rumors.

=====

With the alarms sounding, an automatic message declared Security Level Three has been broken. And told us students to evacuate in an 'orderly fashion'.

No crowd has ever been orderly after being ordered in an emergency. Especially when by a machine. I was pretty sure that was biologically impossible. This shit needed to be drilled to the point it was boring to make that happen.

People needed training to understand that slow was smooth, and smooth was fast. Which was something this school wasn't going to be able to hammer into people in the first week, so I shouldn't be too angry.

"Hold back." I told my table. They looked at me like I was nuts, but... I knew what was about to happen. I'd seen it before.

And sure enough, it did, with people squishing against each other in the halls.

"They're going to get trampled..." Ochako brought her hands to cover her mouth, but not her eyes. She couldn't bring herself to look away.

Yep.

"I'll go help," Tsuyu said. "One of you, be ready to catch."

She jumped a solid forty feet, landed on a wall near the ceiling, and demonstrated she could just stick to surfaces like, well, a frog. Heteromorphs tended to have physical superiority over baseliners, but hers was on a whole other level.

Me? I looked for help. "Kendo!" She had the presence of mind to stay back as well- she was definitely one of the smart ones in the class. "Tsuyu's gonna need someone to catch people."

She got the idea immediately. "On it!"

"Momo! Stretchers!"

She'd also opted to come my direction rather than throw herself into the unruly mosh pit forming in the hall.

And that was a sight to see. Tsuyu's tongue shot into the crowd, picked off those falling or fallen, and then lifted them out. And gently dropped them into Kendo's outstretched giant palm for delivery. If she wanted a job in airlift rescue, she had it for life.

I then went to work putting them on stretchers while running through the basics of first responder training, while Momo and Ochako helped beside me.

"Uraraka! Make me float!" Ida shouted out of nowhere.

Ochako didn't hesitate, just a quick slap of the hand, and then Ida was off into/above the crowd.

"Everyone!" He sailed over the small riot, and grabbed on to the exit sign over the door so the whole group could see them. "Everything is fine! It's just the press!"

Fuckers. Didn't surprise me. Same thing everywhere. If they couldn't find a tragedy, they'd do their level best to make one. It was sad that I was trained in the answer to that problem as well.

So while Ida berated the crowd for not living up to U.A. standards, I had a different task.

"Momo, start cataloguing every little bruise and scrape from our patients, and give them all code names you can translate to their real names."

"Uh... why?" To her credit, she manifested a piece of paper and pen even as she asked.

"Because when we're done here, you're going to contact your fancy family lawyers, and give them that list and this story. I doubt they'll be able to do much with it themselves, but they have to know someone who can and will bring a lawsuit, even if the school for whatever reason does not."

Momo grinned.

"You two look like supervillains right now," Tendo said. "Now look alive!"

She caught another incoming victim of trampling, with any luck the last one who'd need such rough handling.

All told, there were thirty three people with injuries. Fortunately they were all minor, with a few facial bruises. Though I was pretty sure a couple of the guys just straight up punched each other in the face to get in on the action.

But Momo and I made no secret that we'd make the press regret this one, as we added photo evidence and signatures to the inevitable class action suit. Though I did make clear that this wasn't going to amount to much as money was concerned. Even in the famously litigious US of A, this would be settled out of court for a few million before the ink could dry.

This was about retaliation. Paparazzi parasites. Worse than the villains, I swear.

Our little team stuck together after the worst of it was over, chatting now that all the emergencies were cleared. "So, I vote Ida gets MVP for that crisis."

"Thanks, but I hardly did anything, it was your quick thinking that kept me from being caught in that crowd, and Asui and Kendo were saving people."

"I'd say you can call me Itsuka," Kendo said. "But something tells me you won't. Open offer, though. I think saving people from being trampled is first name basis material."

Momo hummed in consideration. "Yes, but what good we were doing was reacting to the crisis at hand. You identified the problem and got ahead of it, in effect ending the crisis while we handled civilian rescue."

"Which is certainly a worthwhile task," Kendo added to the converstation. "But I think we can all agree that prevention is better than treatment."

"Perhaps," Ida mumbled.

"If you like, we still get credit for the assist."

"That would make me feel better, yes. Thank you!" He stood rigid, then bowed like some tradition from a thousand years ago. Dude really needed to lighten up.

Tsuyu croaked again, though softer this time. "You seem to suggest credit for 'assists' a lot, huh? Twice in one day. Is that the sort of hero you plan to be? An assistant?"

"To be honest? I don't plan to be a hero." All my friends eyes were on me, now. "U.A. offers an education I think will be uniquely advantageous for me back home." Not that I know what that advantage will be. "But in the end I'm still going US military command."

"I suppose it's a testament to this fine school that it can cater even to such a goal as yours," Ida said. "But for what it's worth, I think you'd make an excellent hero."

"Thanks."

The next few days went well, and without any particular bullshit. My after school training session grew in popularity, and I got into a rhythm of helping teach some basic maneuvers, and even picked up some 'teaching assistants'.

Itsuka and, to my surprise, Todoroki both seemed to want to share their own combat experience with the group. And I was glad to have them. Itsuka's training was much better suited for beginners than mine, and Todoroki's training was a match for my own.

Without use of his quirk, the two of us were pretty much equals in combat. Sure, I could have gone harder, went for the cripple-kill moves. But he could have done the same.

By the third day, some of the upper classes came in to see what the fuss was about.

"Not bad, not bad at all." One of the upper classmen walked up to me. "I was worried this was going to be some nonsense pushed by some foreigner who thought he knew better."

It took me a moment to realize he'd spoken in English. More, he'd spoken in native English, from the isles. Irish, but I wasn't familiar enough to narrow down a city.

"So they sent a foreigner to check a foreigner?" I did him the favor of using our shared language. If he wanted this semi-private, I'd let him have it.

"That was mostly my decision," he said. "If the school felt the need to shut you down, it wouldn't have been me they sent. So I wasn't too worried. But it turns out, you actually know your stuff. Guess you Americans haven't gone completely soft."

"It's a big country, really depends where you look, but I was raised a Howard, not a coward."

"Ah, now there's a name with roots. I'm a Byrne. Wanna experience the old Irish tradition of making friends?"

"I don't think either of us is drunk enough for most of them, so... I assume we'll be punching each other until it's funny?"

He laughed. "Oh, it's always funny. It's when getting punched is funny that you know you've got a friend."

"Sounds good to me." I looked back to the group, and reminded myself to switch back to Japanese. "Seems one of our upper classmates is choosing to share some insights. Looks like we're about to see what U.A. training is capable of."

"You really are looking for a fight, huh? Now that I'm representing the whole school, I can't hold back."

"Looking forward to it."

"We'll follow the usual rules," Byrne announced to the group. "No quirks this time, just a demonstration of what all of you will be learning in a few years. And keep in mind I just started my final year. I've got a ways to go before I'm the best this school can make me."

I took a proper, if defensive, stance. "Ready when you are." Cocky as I was in running my mouth, I was absolutely taking this seriously. U.A. was, ultimately, a battle school. And this guy had years of their training.

I barely had time to read his moves before he was on me, with a quick jab to the head and the other to my gut. The lower swing was the important one, so I twisted my torso and moved in close.

A brief moment of pain when his fist glanced off my skull, and a shoulder check to push him back. It should have been a perfect opening for a blow to the ribs, but he danced away from me.

"Not bad at all! You're impressive for a first year."

And he was impressive, period. "I also noticed you're still holding back. I mean, aside the fact that your quirk would make it impossible for me to touch you."

It was wind manipulation. Battlefield control just a little less than Shoto, lower end flight, and so much more.

"Yeah, well, I didn't want to embarass you."

"Oh, don't worry, I'm perfectly happy losing to the best."

He laughed. "Now I'm embarassed. I'm not even in my class's top five. But, I suppose if you want it, but if anyone here starts complaining about me picking on the first-years, I'm going to be annoyed."

"Oh, by all means." I smiled and opened my arms. "I'm asking for it." And then immediately closed my guard.

What came next was a rush. He was still kind enough to hold back, using the fullest of his speed but only a portion of his strength. On pure defense, I was still being forced to eat one in every three of his jabs. With real strength behind them, he'd knock me out of my stance in seconds.

Instead, I got to enjoy a couple minutes as a punching bag. I got a couple hits of my own in, by taking a hit in order to hit back, but again, that only worked because he wasn't hitting me like he could have.

"Okay, now I'm starting to feel bad," Byrne said. "Gotta admit, you're damn tough, and faster than I expected. And you took that beating with a smile, so, good enough for an American."

I chuckled, which made my entire upper body hurt. "I know it didn't look like it, but I learned a lot today. More than worth the bruises."

"If it's any consolation, you're way better than I was start of my first year. You'll probably be better than I am now before you're a second year."

He looked out at the crowd, most of whom were far behind even me in terms of combat training. "The rest of you? He knows what he's doing, so if you keep listening to him, you'll be the strongest a first year class has ever been."

Know what? That endorsement was probably worth the beating on its own. "High praise, but it's clear to me I've got a long way to go, myself."

"And that's what you're here for, so don't worry and relax a little. Now show me this meditation thing I've been hearing about. I'm told it's a bit different than what the school teaches."

"How could I refuse? Would you like the introductory history lesson, or do you want to get straight to the action."

"Let's start with the history." He grinned, then switched to English. "We Irish have a certain sympathy for your natives."

As I walked Byrne through the history and process, I took the opportunity to top off my All Might quirk charge. Three days of work and I had a full minute of charge, and could bring myself up to maybe five times my current limits.

It had grown from a second-chance to an actual trump card, and could only go up from there. Still decades away from catching up to All Might, let alone Izuku, but I wasn't Bakugo, I wasn't going to throw a tantrum just because I wasn't the biggest badass on the planet.

After the process, Byrne helped out giving a few exercise pointers and suggestion for base martial arts to build from, but for me and Todoroki, all he could say was whomever taught us was just better than him.

That was fair. Though it was a message that seemed to piss Shoto off.

I resolved to get a little closer to him in the future, maybe I could puzzle out what this chip on his shoulder was from. He wasn't an asshole like Bakugo, he didn't share his anger (or much of anything else) with the world.

But for now, I walked myself to the nurse's office. Copying a regenerator was great and all, but it was obvious when most of your injuries were surface level visual bruises. They would fade too fast to hide or play off.

Meanwhile, Recovery Girl was a known resource available to all.

"I'm surprised to see you here." The very little, very old lady looked up from her desk. She might well be smaller than that purple-haired weirdo, Mineta. God I hoped that was their only shared trait.

"Well, it was bound to happen sooner or later," I said. "Sadly, I'm not invulnerable."

"I was led to believe you've been injured before, and still avoided coming here. I wondered if your quirk might block mine?"

Hmm. "Ah, no, I can repress my resistance." I paused a moment. "Or, maybe it's more accurate to say I have to activate it. It's complicated, but for all intents, I have control enough to allow quirks to effect me."

"Then you're averse to showing weakness by going to the nurse?"

"Yes." More than you know. "Something tells me that's a common trait, here."

"You could certainly say that."

Fortunately, my injuries were surface level, so it was a matter of seconds and didn't leave me zombified after. A nutritional supplement and a sports drink and I'd be back to normal in an hour.

On my way home, I thought about the day and vowed to step up my game. I didn't think Japan's training methodology was better than America's. I'd been on the ass end of enough ass kickings by our elites to know we could more than keep up.

But for a third-year student to be that much better than me, it was proof that U.A.'s methods had plenty to teach us. I would learn it, and I would bring it home with me.

Not because I felt there was any risk of a war between America and Japan any time soon, but because I wouldn't allow my country to play second fiddle, even to an ally.

In retrospect, I should have been more worried about our enemies.

=====

A/N- Fun chapter is fun. Ida gets his moment. Tsuyu continues to be her moment. And I'm trying not to be obnoxious about adding OCs, but I kinda needed one. Someone to demonstrate that U.A. actually does have quality training rather than it merely be an informed claim.

Also... I don't often do this, but I just had to spend 500 dollars on fixing my damned furnace, so... if anyone's liking this story enough to give me some money, now would be a great time to do it.

I tensed when I arrived home, sensing someone in my apartment. I relaxed a moment later when I identified that it was Momo's quirk. I opened the door, and made sure to announce myself. "Momo, how did you get in h-"

I stopped dead in my tracks. Momo had opted to wear a modified nurse's outfit. By which I mean if you wore it in an actual hospital, you'd either be arrested for public indecency or die of hypothermia.

"Marco picked the lo-" She stopped as well. "Your bruises are gone."

Picked the- It's an electronic lock! "I... uh... stopped by to see Recovery Girl. A small bruise or two is one thing, but that was too much." And then it clicked. "Were you planning to nurse me back to health?"

She sighed. "I'm sorry, it was stupid."

I recognized that tone as well. If I let her leave like this, she'd never wear another costume for me in her life. And that was a tragedy I could not fathom. I pulled her into a hug. "If this is stupid, then I don't wanna be smart."

She gave a shy little smirk. "You're just saying that because you're a perv."

"That is precisely why I'm saying it." I kissed her forehead. "And precisely why you wore it in the first place, I'm sure."

"I don't see what the big deal is, it's less revealing than my costume."

"Momo... you do know that everyone stares at you in that costume, right?"

"Not everyone."

"All the guys, and over half the girls... and not all of them out of jealousy."

"Ida doesn't."

"Well, there is that." I needed to get that guy a girlfriend, or a boyfriend, I wasn't one to judge. I would recruit Mina to help, a project for later. "My point is, you do wear a pretty revealing costume. Do you not... realize the effect you have on men?"

"Of course I do. I just don't get why this outfit does anything for you. When I thought you were hurt, it was going to be something cute and silly to raise your mood. And then you got healed, and now I'm dressed like a weirdo. Which you seem to like for some reason."

She was more upset than I expected. She seemed think this was sort of personal failure or something.

"It's not the outfit. Like you said, it's little different from your costume." Which begged a question: why did it effect me so? "I think it's more about how you cared enough to do something fun and spontaneous for me. Which is always very sexy. Ask anyone."

"If you say so."

I resisted the urge to kiss her- something told me she'd be less than appreciative of me thinking her pouty face was cute. "Yeah. I mean, remember how I used to give you piggy back rides when we were kids? You always seemed to love those."

"That was just you showing off." She mumbled, but smiled nonetheless.

"That was me showing off for you," I corrected. "I didn't do that for anyone else." At the time, anyhow. The appropriate time to tell your current partner what you did or didn't do with your ex was never.

"I... guess it does feel pretty nice to know that." She relaxed, which hopefully meant I was past the worst of it.

"How about I do it again? For old time's sake?"

"In this outfit?" She gave me her patented 'unimpressed eyebrow' look. "Somehow, I think that'd be more fun for you than me."

"It can be both, but you've got a point. So... Allie-oop!" I dipped, hooked my arm behind her legs, and but a quick squeal of protest had her in a princess carry. "There, your modesty has been preserved. In as much as is possible in this outfit."

She slapped my chest. "Okay, fine. I see your point. But so we're clear, it's still stupid and so are you."

"I can live with that."

I kissed her, and she kissed back. That was normal enough, but then she kept kissing, and I was more than happy to let her do so. The next several minutes were just that, with me holding her while she kissed me.

"Thanks," she said as she broke off the kiss. "I... was hoping to do something like that after looking after your bruises, but I guess you're the one looking after me, tonight."

"You say that like it's a bad thing, that we have each other's backs." I leaned in. "But next time I get beat up, I promise you have tending rights."

"Shut up and kiss me."

We did that for quite a while longer. Thank fuck we were early in the school year and weren't burdened by massive piles of homework. We even had time for a study session (Momo insisted), and more 'study' session.

And then bed. Momo snuggled up against me this time. "I think you've earned some trust."

"She says as if she's not the one who carries a whole armory to call at a whim." I put my arm over her, settling us into a nice spooning position.

She pushed back against me, which meant her rear pressed right against my groin. "That was supposed to be a hint. How can you be so smart one minute and so dumb the next?"

"I'm a guy, it's what we do. We're at our best with clear rules and a mission to accomplish."

She grabbed my hand, moved it up, and placed it right on her breast. "Over clothes, and nothing below the waist. Clear enough?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

I didn't take nearly the advantage I could have- it struck me as well within possibility of convincing her to do far more just by teasing her until she asked for it. But, the statement rang in my mind that she would have regretted it last time.

So the hormones could sit in the corner and wait. I had higher priorities, like not fucking it up with this sweet, beautiful, fun, brilliant girl in my arms. And also sleep; Recovery Girl's power is the anti-caffeine.

I didn't regret my choice, when in the morning I woke to Momo still in bed, smiling. "You can stop perving on me in my sleep."

"Sorry. You seemed to like doing it, so I wanted to try."

"I didn't say stop, just that I'm not asleep any more." I stretched a little, as much to put on a show as anything. "I'd stay here all day if we could, but responsibilities."

"We'll have time later, I promise."

And one last kiss before we got ready for school, and went by different routes. Yeah, that was going to get annoying as hell, but after seeing what Ochako and Izuku went through yesterday, I understood the logic.

Besides, today promised to be another exciting hero course exercise. Doing 'rescue training' this day, a project that involved some remote location worthy of a bus ride.

Personally, I didn't think that was necessary. A kilo and a half? Not even a mile, long enough to call a warmup and not much more.

But, whatever.

"You know, Izuku, your quirk resembles All Might's."

"R-really?!" He tried to wave off the accusation. "Nah, I mean, I..."

"But All Might doesn't get hurt," Eijiro said. "So they have that difference. And, Izuku can also do what I do, so... I have to admit, makes me feel pretty inadequate all considered."

"Don't say that," Izuku said. "You've got a great quirk, more than enough to go pro."

"What do you think?" Mina leaned toward me. "I'm sure you've gotten a look at Izuku and All Might's quirks. How similar are they?"

And Izuku looked like he was either about to confess the truth, or jump out the bus window while we were was moving.

Quick! All the deflection!!! "Eh..." I waggled my hand. "On the surface, but the mechanism is completely different. All Might's power is almost a form of tactile telekinesis, where he controls his own kinetic energy. It's how he can punch hard enough to change the weather, without leveling every building in the city. He doesn't even break windows on the same street."

"Oh!" Ida sat up straighter. "Or how he can break the sound barrier in order to rescue people, without hurting them in the whiplash!"

Hurt, riiiight. What would actually happen is bodies being cleaned up with a mop.

Tsuyu croaked in thought. "I guess when you put it that way, they aren't as alike as I thought they were."

How have I not been hauled off to a black site, yet? "Really, a lot of powers are more complex than they look on the surface. Mina, Ochako, your quirks are far more 'busy' than they initially let on."

"Uh, really?" Ochako said. "I mean, I just make things weightless, that's all."

I looked at her, and shook my head.

"No?"

"Well, if that were the case... wouldn't whatever you touch launch up like a helium balloon, only faster because helium and the balloon still have weight pulling down, not enough to overcome atmospheric upward pressure."

"I... hadn't thought about that, before?" Ochako muttered. "I guess I'm reducing weight to about that of air?"

"You're not about to tell me I don't make acid, are you?" Mina asked. "I mean, you looked at my quirk before and said that's what it was."

"My power pays more attention to effect than cause." I shrugged, as if that wasn't a notable and exploitable weakness. "But the more I think about it, the more your acid doesn't seem like an acid. Normal acids do damage with chemical reactions that generate heat, fumes, and some form of salt. Sometimes toxic. Yours is clean."

"That is strange," Momo agreed.

"I guess I never thought about it before," Mina said. "Then what is my power?"

"If I had to guess? Some sort of disintegration power via a fluid medium." Though I wasn't sure about that, either. "Or, maybe, your fluid is a super-solvent. Some solvents, like water, can dissolve a lot of things without chemical reactions. And sometimes there are many reactions, like life itself."

"That 'solvent' thing feels right, I think," Mina said.

"We can run some tests, later," Momo offered. "I'm in a support class, and the students there just love this sort of thing. I'm sure we can figure it out."

"And solvent is much better than acid for a hero." The blond guy with the stomach laser said. "Popular appeal matters, and my navel laser is perfect!"

"If you don't explode your own stomach," Mina shot back. Then looked to me. "Ooh, what about his quirk? What's it really like?"

The guy's eyes widened. "Ah, that's okay, I'd like to keep a bit of the mystery if it's all the same to you."

That's not strange at all. "Suit yourself," I lied. And then I turned to talk to Izuku about nothing in particular, just some suggestions with his Judo training. While I checked.

And I'd never seen anything quite like it. In some ways, it was almost like All Might's quirk, a sort of conglomeration of power. But it wasn't a number of individual quirks in tandem, so much as someone had taken different pieces of broken pottery and glued them together.

It was angry, too. A wounded, enraged animal forced into servitude.

Then, maybe I was overthinking what I saw. Tokoyami and Izuku had more bizarre looking quirks than his, and there was something in Shoto's that I struggled to quantify as well.

Either way, I was left with questions my power was not able to answer, and I wasn't prepared to ask. So it was easiest just to let it slide and worry about myself.

Fortunately, whatever tells might have been given, must have been overshadowed by the conversation of heroic abilities and their appeal. With Bakugo making a scene after being called 'unhinged' and having 'a steamed turd of a personality'.

All very, very true. Momo didn't seem to find it near as amusing as I did, but she was probably laughing on the inside.

It didn't take us long to reach the training facility. A massive domed facility (seriously, who was their architect!?) that contained a dozen sectioned off areas the size of a neighborhood.

"Every disaster and accident you can imagine." A man wearing a replica of a space suit declared to the crowd. His voice was disguised as well. "I built this facility myself, I call it the Unforseen Simulation Joint!"

Everyone started gushing about how this was some local celebrity hero called 'Thirteen' who mainly did disaster work and rescue.

Aizawa chatted with him about something, keeping his voice down as they went.

And I... I felt something. A twisting of space, an emergence of something. "Uh, is part of this demonstration supposed to include a bunch of people entering by teleport?"

"No." Aizawa's eyes turned toward me, then toward where the effect was starting to open, exposing a man's face. Who was wearing a human hand for a mask. What a tacky mother fucker.

Unless it was real, in which case he was still tacky, but also sick in the head.

The portal expanded outward, and dozens started pouring out. Most of them weren't much to talk about- low grade quirks, freaky heteromorphic features.

Aizawa shouted his orders, telling us all to fall back and huddle up for Thirteen to protect.

A shadowy man, the one that brought them here, rose above the others. "Thirteen, Eraser-Head, was it? According to the staff schedule I recieved, All Might is supposed to be here."

Beside him, Mister Handjob growled, his voice distorted into something pained and barely human. "Where is he? We've come all this way, brought so many playmates. All Might, the symbol of peace. Is he here?

"I wonder if some dead kids will bring him here?!"

I ran up next to Aizawa. He didn't so much as look at me. "I told you to get back."

"Most of them aren't much to worry about." I didn't bother to argue "The knives and swords are a bigger threat than their powers. But those three. Shadow-space manipulation to open portals- he's their teleporter, but his ability could be used to, say, catch an incoming attack and deflect it toward an ally, or all sorts of battlefield control."

Aizawa nodded. At least he was willing to listen, rather than keep giving orders we both knew I wouldn't follow.

"The guy with all the extra hands for a costume? Disintegration power. If he touches you with his fingers, you will die." I didn't bother mentioning that he had excellent control, and could choose to destroy a little bit at a time if he wanted.

I took a breath. Even a glance had hurt, and I went back for a second to get a better idea of what we faced. "That beakface with the exposed brain? That thing is an artificial monster, loaded with at least a dozen quirks for strength, toughness, and regeneration the likes of which I can't begin to describe. I bet it was made to be a rival to All Might."

=====

A/N- I know, Thirteen's a woman. Probably some sort of retcon, but I'm working with the manga as it's written, and everyone uses male pronouns for her, so... I'm just going to assume she is very guarded about her identity.

In any case, now is when shit starts going crazy. And these next few chapters are critical, so I'm nervous as hell about getting them right.

To his credit, Aizawa didn't argue with my claims about 'a dozen or more quirks' like I'd anticipated. Everyone 'knew' people could only have one quirk, even if some quirks were stronger or more versatile than others.

"Thank you." He took a breath. "Thirteen! Evacuate the the students and try calling for help! One of these villains must be jamming the emergency alerts! I don't suppose you could tell me which one?"

That was a very good question. "Not like this, no. Up close, with some time to search, but not at a glance in a chaotic environment."

"We'll work on training that in the future. Kaminari, try using your quirk to signal for help. Electric types tend to resist one another."

Aizawa took another step to the edge of the stairs.

"But, sensei, you can't fight them all on your own!" Midoriya shouted after him, then went on a mini-rant about how his style wasn't suited for this.

"No good hero is a one trick pony." Aizawa's tone feigned far more confidence than he had to be feeling right now. No, that was the body language of a man who expected to die, but planned to do it fighting. "Thirteen! Take care of them."

And then he leaped. Off this three story platform into the fray.

Fuck. I wanted to rush down after him, but... he was right. He had his mission, we had ours, and right now ours was survival.

But he held his own, took out three of them within a second of landing, and then kept moving through their ranks.

"I won't allow that!" The shadow-portal villain appeared in front of the entrance, blocking our escape. "We are the League of Villains. We are here to end the life of All Might-"

Bakugo was preparing an attack, I could see him tensing and charging his ability. "Center body mass, and don't hold back, he's got a toughness quirk."

He glanced at me, growled something unintelligible, and then charged.

He wasn't the only one. Eijiro and a guy from the other hero course with the ability to turn to steel rather than stone jumped in. Spears vines and projectile horns also joined the onslaught.

And I, in the back, borrowed from Aizawa and blocked his quirk. In doing so, I made Bakugo a killer. I told him this asshole could take it, then took away any chance of him using his shadows to divert damage.

It was an unforgivable act, but this was survival and I was willing to play the monster if it meant this equivalent of a fucking school shooter died an ignoble death.

Then a massive wall of muscle blocked the way. The anti-All Might weapon caught Bakugo's blast right in one of its unblinking eyes, was pierced by spears and horns in the chest, cut and bludgeoned by fists and claws.

And if any damage was inflicted at all, it healed too fast for my eye to see.

Just as horrifying, in the time it took Bakugo to move five feet, that thing had gone a hundred yards. There was no running from this.

We're all fucking dead. Once that thing started swinging, none of us survived. I switched powers, copying shadow-guy. I didn't have his experience, and there was something deeply wrong about with this power, but I should be able to pull some of us out in time.

For what little good that would do when I was pretty sure it could run to the school in a second or two, and I couldn't take us any real distance without risk of putting us in the upper atmosphere or something.

"Get back!" Thirteen shouted, as he began opening up his quirk. It wasn't truly a black hole, but was more than lethal enough against most opponents. I... didn't have much hope for its ability against the monster.

"More ruthless than I'd have expected for aspiring heroes," shadow-guy said. "To think, you would force us to deploy Nomu so early. Now begone! Writhe in torment. Until your last breath."

Fuck. I dived for Momo, trying to use the shadow-quirk, but again, something was wrong with this thing. If Aoyama's quirk was a wounded animal, this thing was a rabid beast, no longer capable of anything but rage.

In the end, I couldn't save her, only myself. They were all gone. Except for... "Junko?"

"He... he killed my... Mineta!"

Dammit. At least my desire to comfort her wasn't entirely her power. Crying women had that effect, sue me. "He's fine."

"R-really?" She believed me a bit too quick, but I wasn't in a condition to notice.

"Really. He just scattered everyone into the disaster zone. They're all still alive and well." For now. "We're in far worse danger."

That monster, Nomu, stood unblinking and unconcerned. Whatever it once was, it lacked any ability to feel or think, only to obey. One would think they'd use it, but perhaps it had a limited operational time, and they were preserving its strength for the one opponent it was made to kill.

I hopped to my feet. "I'm going down to help Aizawa."

He jumped off the three story platform, I slid my way down the railing. My specifications on my boots included steel reinforcements on the soles for just this sort of activity.

Some nutjob with a rusty katana was there to meet me. Duck under, arm grab, twist and snap, he dropped the blade and fell clutching his inverted elbow. I stomped down on his other arm, just in case.

I left the sword behind. The only way that thing was going to kill was by sepsis.

My target was the big guy that could only be described as a minotaur. He'd been dazed by Aizawa earlier, but big guys like that tended to have more in them than a single fall could remove.

I ducked under a punch, took advantage of his size to spin him around, then hopped up his back. His horns were nearly three feet long, curved, and sharp both at the tip and along the upper half of the horn itself. I wondered if he sharpened them, or this was natural. Either way, they would do nicely.

Then I borrowed his own strength, and closed my eyes. Am I really doing this?

Back in high school, Dad took it upon himself to teach me the psychological aspects of war and its damage to the human mind.

'PTSD, they used to call it, and shell-shock before then. Now, they have it broken up into a dozen clinical terms.' My father had been facing a window at the time, but he was looking somewhere else entirely. 'Thousands of studies have been done, breaking down every nuance, and almost all of it is luck. Some people are resistant, others susceptible.'

He shook his head. 'But one thing that can be controlled, is why you kill. Studies have shown that killing for orders ends in disaster. Convincing yourself your enemy isn't human... worse still, that way of thinking catches up to you one way or another. Even killing to protect yourself only goes so far. The best method, if you must, is killing to protect others. Your squadmates, your loved ones. Your family. That seems to be the one cause the human brain most accepts.'

I took a breath. Sorry, Momo, I do this to protect you. I twisted, and snapped both the minotaur's horns off his head, then turned my hands and jabbed them down into his shoulders.

I jumped off as he fell. Nothing. The first time I killed, and I felt nothing. Only the light sense of security that came from being closer to the end of a crisis.

Now I was armed. Two good weapons beat all the trash they were carrying, and their quirks were still garbage.

Only for me to catch sight of Junko, who made her way down the stairs. Fuck. Her power was insidious, and there wasn't much I could do about it. I ran over to her. "You need to get back, where it's safe."

She smiled at me. "Don't worry, I'm perfectly safe." It was like I was talking to a small child, trying to protect from her own ignorance.

She can't be this- UGH! I couldn't even force myself to be mad at her, only the situation. And it was about to get worse. "Here, take this, in case you need it."

I handed off one of the broken horns.

She took it, smiling. "My, how gallant of you."

She is making fun of me. Some distant, clinical part of my mind tried so very hard to break through her power. It didn't help.

Fuck. "Now stay back!" I turned and went back into the battle. One weapon wasn't much worse than two, so I was far from helpless in this situation.

A fire-quirk user, pretty weak, and left his guard wide open for me to stab up under his armpit as I moved. I wasn't like Aizawa, who could bring down three or four guys per second. Each one, I had to pause, think, and bait an opening.

If they weren't fucking idiots, I'd have no chance here. But they were just thugs running wild, not a trained fighting force.

Junko... fucking walked up to the nearest cluster of villains. God damn it. I gave up on my combat strategy to carve through the ones that Aizawa softened up, to go rescue the ditz redhead.

Two of them stepped around her, looking at me as if I was the threat to protect her from.

Only for her to swipe the horn I'd given her across one guy's neck. Opening corotid arteries and jugular veins alike. With the grace of a ballerina, she spun and took the second the same way.

The third, she stabbed in the gut.

Her gym outfit was now as red as her hair, and with a close-lipped but cheerful smile, she walked on to the next group.

That... that wasn't the worst part. Seeing those three men there, all of whom she just fatally wounded, looking at her as she left. They weren't angry, they weren't even afraid, they were confused and saddened by what had occurred.

Fuck. I turned away. I'd killed two people and it barely registered, but if this day gave me nightmares, they'd be of hers.

At least I wasn't so pissed about handing off that horn. She was far more deadly with one knife than I could ever be with two.

So I left her to her devices, and returned to fighting my way through to Aizawa. Unlike him, I made sure nobody was standing back up in my wake. For a guy who goes on about 'logical' decisions, that wasn't very logical of him.

"I thought I told you to evacuate!" Aizawa dived between two villains, and used his 'ribbons' to bring their feet out from under them.

"Can't! Shadow guy scattered the other students into the arenas. And I'm not leaving them behind!"

"You should be running for help! Not killing people!"

"Tell you what. You run, I'll run cover." I twisted to meet another oncoming villain, and added yet another life to my tally. "Now as I see it, we're trapped behind enemy lines and you're the senior officer. Give me orders I'll obey!"

"Intel, then. Where are the students, are they okay?"

"All over the place, and they should be fine." It wasn't easy, but I could discern some level of health of those out there from the current strength of their quirks. "Honestly, this so-called League of Villains is pretty pathetic. Todoroki or that girl with the vine hair could probably solo their entire army."

I was interrupted by some jerk trying to sneak up on me. I dropped forward, hands on the ground, and a back kick right into his groin. With enough force that his pelvic bone crumpled inward. He'd probably survive, but his sex life was over.

"Then cover me on the left, I want to sweep around the right."

I could see what he was doing- buying time. Knowing who the real opponents were, and that they were watching the mooks get trashed without interference. And with my confirmation of the students' safety, he was free to drag this out.

So I joined in. I borrowed Aizawa's quirk for a moment to neutralize an electric quirk long enough to stab his neck without cooking myself. "We have about two minutes before students start returning."

"Wow..." The hands-guy half-laughed. "What a hypocrite. You call yourself a hero, all while killing everyone in your way. I think you might be a better villain than I am."

I faced him down. Was he trying to make an ethical argument? A comment on society? He was a morality driven extremist? I glanced at Aizawa, saw him nod as he want back to the fight.

"Sorry, Handjob, I've never claimed to be a hero." I was willing to buy time with talk if I could, but I wanted him on the back foot. "I am a patriot and a soldier. Putting down subhuman, terrorist, school shooting scum like you is half my job description. Heroism isn't even on the top ten list, and pacifism can fuck right off. We tried that, it didn't work.

"And I'm not even Japanese, so you can stuff your social commentary up your own ass."

It was hard to tell what he thought of my counter-rant. His pallid, low-affect features and attempts to sound creepy as fuck were as good a poker face as Tsuyu's. "Then why are you here?"

A good question that I still can't claim I've a definitive answer for. "To go to class you fucking b-movie reject." As opposed to Junko's absolute top tier nightmare fuel. "The real question is why are you here?"

"To kill All-"

"Yes, yes, murdering All Might, but again, why. Do his chiselled abs and rippling biceps make you feel all tingly and confused in your pants?"

"He is the symbol of peace, the lynchpin of this corrupt and decadent society. With is death, I shall rise up as the symbol of fear, and bring proper order to the world."

"The... world?" I stopped to look at him. Then stabbed sideways to pick off another incompetent opportunist. While Junko... it was best to ignore Junko... "You do know that All Might's not that important in the grand scheme of things, right?"

"He's the symbol of peace," Handjob repeated as if that changed a thing.

"And people keep saying Americans are ignorant of geopolitics. We have Aegis, and Star and Stripe. Yakshi over in India, Europe has Fulgurante and Thalassa. And then there's China, South America, Africa, Australia. All of them have heroes on that level.

"All Might's powerful, maybe even number one in the world. But any two of the top ten could take him down as a team."

I might have been exaggerating a little, and ignoring that there was a chance Star would side with All Might over America, but Handjob didn't need to know that. I needed him off-balanced enough to forget about All Might and his plans.

"Then, even with All Might's death?"

"You'd make the international news, and go from being a home grown terror group to the Enterprise sitting right off shore while an international effort to solve Japan's terrorist problem burns your entire system to the ground. I don't know who or how you managed to modify your quirk, or make that Nomu, but I promise it won't be enough."

Handjob started trembling, scratching at his face. "No, no no..."

Wasn't expecting to be able to talk the villain down, but I wasn't complaining. "If anything, I can only imagine what people would do to have your tech. You could probably use that to secure a decent plea bargain or whatever."

Wasn't sure what Japan was like in that regard, but that Nomu would be classed as 'vital interest' in no time. We'd have presidents and prime ministers and 'supreme leaders' across the globe crawling all over this situation.

"My quirk... am I a Nomu?" I heard Handy mutter more to himself than me.

"Uh... if that's what you call the process of breaking a quirk and stitching it together with other quirks in order to create some Frankenstein's Monster from the remains? Then, yes, you are that. You didn't know?"

Before anyone could say anything else, Shadow popped up. Looking all the worse for the wear. Black globules dripped off his form like blood, and his looked less like humanoid smoke and more like a pool of oil trying to stand upright. "W-we need to leave. Now."

"You're staying right where you are." Aizawa had worked around to behind the pair from where I stood. What few villains were left were in no position to fight anymore, and already our classmates were entering my range. Shadow was locked down, Handy was only a threat if somehow Todoroki became an idiot.

This would have been over, but for one teensy little weapon of mass destruction.

"Nomu!" Handy shouted. "Kill them all!"

=====

Fuck, they're bailing. I had options, with my classmates pouring in. Behind me, I heard Junko's scream, and then felt the ground shake. She was closest, she was the first target of Nomu. A creature without thought, without feeling, without the level of brainpower needed for her quirk.

I would worry about that later, mourn her death. For now, I wanted to teach this fucker a lesson.

I reached out to Momo's quirk.

When most people see Momo, they lock on to her beauty. Even as a child people knew she'd be a heart breaker some day. When they learn of her quirk, their mindset locks on to how damn powerful she is.

What only a lucky few got to realize, was how brilliant she was. The genius that allowed her to control the convoluted mess that was her power. All things I'd taken into account when thinking about how I'd use her quirk if I were to copy it.

I wasn't as smart as her, if I were given a month of practice and an hour to do it, I might be able to make a pencil with her quirk.

But I didn't need a pencil.

I needed a war crime.

And there was nothing complicated about Atomic Number Fifteen.

I had just enough time to make a fist-sized ball of the stuff in a glass globe, then chuck it at their retreating faces. A brilliant flash of white was the last thing I saw before the portal closed.

And I nearly fell over from exhaustion. It was like I'd starved myself for three days just to produce that one little weapon. As opposed to the nonsense Momo did on a daily basis like it was nothing.

But I'd worry about that later. Now it was time to shit myself in terror. I turned to face what was coming, bringing up all of my copied All Might power and a quick prayer I didn't think would be answered.

Nomu had been punching his way through the crowd, and wasn't far from me. Another burst of power right behind me, and... I was okay?

Green lightning was the sum of my vision, and it took a moment to catch on. This was Izuku in my way. His expression of All Might's quirk letting him take a punch from the Nomu.

And it didn't seem to know what to do with that. It moved to yet another target. Izuku did the same, intercepting a millisecond before the blow and saving another student. This time, Tsuyu was the beneficiary.

Nomu moved, Izuku moved faster. But that wouldn't last. Each blow was dealing damage- far less than it would any of us, but more than enough that Izuku would kill himself sooner rather than later with that power of his.

And I really did not want to be part of some last-second desperate effort to transfer All Might's quirk to one of the people here.

I ran to Shoto. "Your quirk! Try to freeze that thing!"

"I did! It just pulls out of the ice!"

"I didn't say freeze the ground around it, I said freeze it!" And I realized the problem, aside me giving that order while covered in blood. "It's not alive, not really. It's some sort of biological machine meant to carry quirks."

He was ready to argue, then Ochako screamed as she was saved from an ugly, ugly death.

On the plus side, if we got out of this alive, that was the look of a woman who was going to give her hero the traditional reward. "We don't have time to argue! Either it dies, or we do!"

He closed his eyes, and on opening them his doubt was gone. "Fine. Try to lure it this way if you can. As close to straight at me that isn't going to hit me would be ideal."

How would I... I looked around. Other classmates were doing their best to pen Nomu in. Projectiles and energy blasts, walls of spiked vines, earthworks, one guy was making solidified air with his breath that at best slowed the beast for a moment.

Dozens of Mineta's sticky blobs (I refused to call them balls) were stuck all over its body, along with clumps of earth, chunks of concrete, and bits of wood that it had bumped into since.

Nothing was working- it just kept striking, and Izuku kept sacrificing a bit more of his health to eat yet another blow that would have proven lethal to any of the rest of us.

Thirteen's black hole quirk opened up, only to close because Nomu had already moved away to strike another victim.

There was one possible chance. Maybe. Probably not. "Jiro!"

"I'm hoping you have a plan?"

"A couple. Do you think you could... emulate the voice that shadow guy used?"

She considered it. "I could... try. I'm not sure I can control the pitch enough, and my memory isn't that great to reconstruct it from just a few words."

Damn. "Well, you're the best chance we've got right now. Deku's got minutes at best before his quirk fails, and then we're all dead. And running won't help." It would catch us.

"Okay... want me to say something in particular?"

"Yeah. Try telling it to stand down."

It took a few cycles, but Jiro eventually managed to make something that sounded close enough to the distorted echo-voice of Shadow. It wasn't working. The Nomu seemed to pick up on the noise, but didn't obey.

She gave it several other commands, like 'stop', 'cease', 'shut down', 'retreat' and 'return to base', but it didn't listen. Either it needed specific code phrases, or Jiro wasn't able to emulate the voice well enough.

Fuck me. "Okay, one last thing... tell it to attack me."

"What?!"

I smirked. "Power immunity, remember? I'll be fine. Wait for my signal."

I would not be fine. But I had enough in the tank to survive a hit. Probably.

"Everyone, be ready to target on my position!" I shouted, and Jiro amplified my voice to the group. I ran toward the center. Fucking fuckity fuck. "Now!"

"Nomu, attack that one!"

This time, it listened. Charging right for me. Izuku was there to take that first hit for me, and a second. The third was just fast enough to evade him. I was ready, hopping off the ground and loading every bit of All Might's power I'd emulated on top of the Nomu's power.

I blocked as well, and my arms folded inward like so much paper mache. I'd effectively drained its momentum by moving before it hit me, burning part of my stockpile to lower the relative impact force. The rest to eat the hit.

It still wasn't enough to save my arms, even with that creature's quirk soaking even more of the damage.

But it was enough to buy time. Todoroki had encased it in a wall of ice, and now that it was pinned, maybe they could do something.

When I woke up, Momo was holding me, crying. "You can stop, I'm awake." Owww. Best regeneration I'd ever had, and I was still fucked up internally. But not like I had been.

"Alex!"

"Talk later, fight now." I forced myself to sit up. They still had it pinned, with Thirteen's quirk doing most of the work of keeping it damaged. But Todoroki and the vine girl were the only thing keeping it from escaping, and both of them were near the limits of their stamina.

"F-fuck... help me up."

Momo, bless her, listened. "Okay, this is going to sound insane..."

I walked her through the plan as she walked me to Todoroki. "I need someone with enhanced strength!" I didn't care who.

Momo got to work. "Shoto. We're going to throw a canister at the Nomu. And you need to set it on fire when it gets close."

"N-n-no..." He was shivering from the effects of his quirk.

"No? Why!?"

"I... I refuse to use my left side in battle. I will be a hero with my mother's quirk alone."

What nonsensical bullshit- no, that won't help. "I'm not asking you to use your fire to be a hero. I'm asking you to use it to kill a diseased animal!"

Still, he shook his head. Or was that trembling from overtaxing his power? Okay, it's not so bad, I'll just copy his power myself. This is worth the exposure. Worst case scenario, I left the school.

If All Might's secret was enough, then Momo, and the secret of the Nomu, was more than worth the time and expense.

"I'm ready." Momo said, while pulling her top back up. At least she understood that there was a time for abandoning the trappings of civilization in the name of victory. Next to her was a barrel drum worth of the same trick I'd pulled on Handjob, this time in a metal container.

"So am I..." A huge Sasquatch-like heteromorph approached. "You need muscle? I'm muscle."

I'll fucking take it! "I need you to grab that barrel, and chuck it right at that fucking monster. Try not to breach it."

It was a metal drum, so probably could take a beating, but I wasn't about to take chances with a god damn human body worth of pure phosphorus. He threw the barrel.

"Fire in the hole!" I shouted, and I readied my attack.

But I didn't get a chance to use it. A stream of flame came from beside me, as Shoto got a grip on whatever was going on in his head, and let loose all his power.

The fire formed a vortex, meeting walls of earth, ice, and vine, then curling upward where they folded into Thirteen's quirk.

When the smoke cleared, Nomu still stood. Its flesh melted down to bone, the bone brittle and fractured.

Phosphorus was both a critical part of human biology and a deadly toxin. Overexposure would deal lasting damage for years after the fact. Damaging skin, bone, organs. Its long term effects were why almost every nation on Earth had signed treaties forbidding its use as a weapon of war.

Less well known was that its effects were especially useful against regenerators. The theory was that since the body needed phosphorus to survive, and it was a base element rather than a chemical compound, that it couldn't just be purged or metabolized.

The Nomu was still regenerating at a pace faster than any other I'd ever seen, but not the near-instant healing of before. "Everyone! Hit it with everything you've got! Don't give it time to recover! Don't worry, it's not a person, it's a machine made to use quirks!"

It might have been a person, once, but I wasn't going to say that. Mina's 'acid' hit its half-dissolved face, and kept dissolving. It was like watching a sugar cube melt. If that sugar cube looked like some mutant beaked abomination.

Telekinetically controlled horns shot in, piercing the thing's legs and arms, and trying to pull it to the ground while Todoroki added even more layers of ice again.

And Thirteen dropped his black hole right on its head.

All while Aizawa and I used his quirk to slow its regeneration that little bit more.

It wasn't enough.

It was not enough. With a slow but steady pull, Shoto's ice cracked. Then popped, and an arm was free. A punch, and it shattered enough ice to free the other. As well as the arm itself, which was already stitching itself back together.

Midoriya, so exhausted he'd been laying against some upturned earth, forced himself to his feet in preparation for the inevitable.

A leg tensed, and the last of the ice hold it broke.

It didn't even bother to pull the horns or spears of wood out before the wounds healed over. It didn't care, it didn't feel pain, and it would heal faster than we could hurt it. Even my fraction of that thing's regeneration already had me feeling stronger than I ever had been, but what good would that do when it was so strong? At best, I'd be the last one to die.

Momo was already preparing a second barrel, but it wasn't going to be in time, and even if it was, it wouldn't be enough.

"FEAR NOT, STUDENTS! BECAUSE I AM HERE!!!"

=====

A/N- *Pokes canon again* Now it's on fire. And full of war crimes.

Also: That Nomu was utter bullshit in canon. Completely unfair. There really is only one way to fight the fucker. But, hey, the power of teamwork