Chapter 7: Divine Right of Kings
The moment Tang Ping opened his eyes, he was met with a youthful, mischievous face. Those vibrant purple eyes were brimming with joy, and her upturned lips formed two small, charming dimples.
"Loyal servant~"
"?"
"I'm so happy~"
"Is that so."
"Aren't you going to ask me why I'm happy?"
"Uh... why are you happy?"
"Take—a—guess~"
"......"
"Hahaha!"
Early that morning, Tanoxi had finally awoken from her deep slumber. Showing a complete lack of moral consideration, she shook the sleeping Tang Ping awake just to treat him to this utterly meaningless conversation.
"Ughhhh~"
Tang Ping stretched his limbs and lazily stood up from the ground. In the distance, the sun was slowly ascending, and the rolling waves crashed against the shore in bursts of white foam. The faint, shimmering green film in the sky served as a constant reminder of their current location.
*Creation of the land... demonic beasts...*
The memories of the previous night flooded back, leaving Tang Ping in a daze. *So... it wasn't a dream after all?*
He scanned his surroundings. As far as the eye could see, there was only barren wasteland. Not a single weed grew, and not even a wild bird flew overhead. The only prominent landmark was the still-smoking volcano. Tanoxi's divine art seemed to be functioning perfectly, as Tang Ping couldn't detect even a hint of sulfur in the air.
"Are you awake, Excellency?"
A voice suddenly rang out.
Tang Ping's nerves snapped taut. He instinctively shielded Tanoxi in his arms. His Water God Seal activated instantly, and a second later, an aluminum laundry drying pole materialized in his hands.
"Who's there?!"
A woman stepped out from behind a mound of earth.
"It is an honor to receive your summons, my Lord!"
The woman wore a classical Chinese-style combat outfit made of snow-white silk, embroidered with green thread in cloud and dragon patterns. The soft curves of her chest filled out the fabric prominently. Over her clothes, she wore a layer of light dragon-scale armor. She was exceptionally tall—at least 190 centimeters. Her most striking features were the pair of golden dragon horns on her head and her sea-green hair, which was tied into a high ponytail for convenience. She looked every bit the heroic woman warrior.
Staring at this uniquely styled woman, Tang Ping froze for a few seconds before realization dawned on him.
"Y-You're the dragon from last night?"
"This humble one is named Qing Lan. I look forward to your guidance, Master Husband!"
"M-Master Husband?!"
Qing Lan bowed her head, showing respect to her master's partner, completely ignoring the fact that he was currently standing there with his jaw hitting the floor.
Just then, a group of people emerged from behind another mound. They were clad in blue-gray animal pelts—even their trousers and boots were made of the same material. They looked like hunters from deep within the mountains, appearing far too overdressed for the weather.
"Hahaha! To think that Lady Tanoxi actually got herself a boyfriend. I can finally die in peace!" laughed a sturdy old man leading the pack.
Tang Ping looked closer. The old man and the people behind him all had a pair of beast ears on their heads and fluffy tails behind them! Behind the old man were three brothers who looked remarkably alike, their bodies defined by lean muscle and a raw, wild beauty.
The youngest-looking youth asked his elder brother, "Big brother, what's a 'boyfriend'?"
"It means a mate. You know, someone you can copulate with," the eldest brother replied.
The middle brother, however, had his hands in his pockets and looked skeptical. "For real? Someone actually wants that 'over-aged bachelorette' who's known as the Great Undersea Powder Keg?"
The moment the words left his mouth, a white tentacle appeared out of nowhere and swatted him away, embedding him into a nearby cliffside like a piece of installation art.
"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all... My deepest apologies, Lady Tanoxi! I have failed to raise my son properly. Please, punish us as you see fit!"
"Hmph!" Tanoxi turned her head with a huff, seemingly letting it slide.
Suddenly, a massive shadow loomed over the group. Tang Ping looked up only to see a "sun" falling from the sky, hurtling toward them.
"Ah?!"
But there was no impact. About thirty meters above their heads, the "sun" changed shape. It shrank rapidly into a small boy with black hair and black wings. He flapped his wings and dived straight into Tanoxi's arms.
"Big sister, long time no see! Are you getting married?"
"Well, something like that!" *In maybe a thousand years,* the silver-haired Evil God thought. Since Tanoxi was currently in her loli form, she and the boy looked like a pair of close siblings.
"Then I'm going to catch lots and lots of fish as a wedding gift for you!" The boy was adorable, wearing a small, loose white robe. He beamed at Tang Ping, who remained utterly confused.
"Lady Tanoxi, what is going on—"
Tang Ping was cut off before he could finish.
"Abyssal Art—Earthen Summoning!"
Tanoxi clapped her hands together, and a massive building slammed into the ground. Tang Ping waved his hands to clear the rising dust. When he finally saw the structure clearly, he blurted out:
"Isn't that TOSTTO?!"
The building was a long, horizontal rectangle with snow-white concrete walls. From Tang Ping's perspective, it looked like a giant block of tofu. The name "TOSTTO" was painted in a bold Christmas-red font, standing out vividly under the glow of five spotlights at the top.
Tang Ping was 200% certain this was the internationally famous warehouse club, TOSTTO—specifically, the branch from the outskirts of Rookie City. He had shopped there since his first day in the city; having visited over a hundred times, it was impossible to mistake it.
Tanoxi didn't explain. She just smiled and said, "I want to catch up with my friends for a bit. Could you be a dear and prepare lunch? I'm getting a bit hungry!"
Though she was smiling, her tone left no room for argument. As a former corporate slave, Tang Ping immediately translated his boss's subtext: *You're in the way. Scram!*
"Oh, okay!"
Tang Ping glanced at Tanoxi and the others before turning to run toward the TOSTTO. For some reason, he felt uneasy about leaving Tanoxi alone with them. He wanted to know what they were talking about, but he had no choice.
Once Tang Ping was inside the building, the old man spoke up. "That scent... the Master Husband isn't a transformed monster or beast, is he, Lady Tanoxi?"
"No, he's a pure-bred human." Tanoxi nodded.
"Ehh! Seriously?" The beast-eared youth, who had just been peeled off the wall by his kinsmen, gaped in shock.
"Big sister, what's a human?" the little boy asked, tugging on her sleeve.
"A very common type of food on the mainland," Tanoxi replied without a second thought.
"You mean... Big sister, you're going to marry food?!" The boy looked horrified.
"Lady Tanoxi, does Lady Freya know about this?" the green-haired Dragon Princess asked with concern.
"How could I tell her?! If she hadn't taken it upon herself to find me a fiancé from the Black Dragon Tribe—and insisted I go on a blind date with him soon—I wouldn't have been in such a rush to find a human replacement!"
Just thinking about her mother made Tanoxi's blood boil. Her mother, who used to treat her like a fragile glass lantern when she was little and lied to her constantly, had recently invited herself over again. She had the gall to put on that "You're getting so old and you're still so crude! How will you ever find a husband?" face.
That woman was always "accidentally" dropping by to spray "dog food" (public displays of affection) and brag about her own husband, saying things like, "Oh, your Father God did such a silly thing again!" or "I really didn't choose the wrong man; he loves me most!"
*You bastard!*
*I moved out precisely so you wouldn't keep flaunting your marriage in front of me. You think I don't want to leave the single life? I'm an adult; my body is ready for its reproductive cycle at any time! If it weren't for the fact that everyone in our tribe is too weak and I can't stand other races, you wouldn't get to show off in front of me, you old hag!*
*And now you've gone and arranged a marriage for me without asking?*
*Hmph! I won't let you have your way. So what if it's a husband? I'll just raise one myself!*
Tanoxi clenched her fist, her mind made up.
It seemed, however, that someone saw through her better than she saw through herself...
"Playing with a man's feelings just for something like that... how despicable!"
*THUD!*
The "Future Hope of the Clan" and "Pride of the Permafrost Magic Wolves"—this beast-eared youth who simply couldn't stop telling the truth—once again became a permanent fixture of the cliffside.
"By the way, you all need to prepare. There's a war coming," Tanoxi said, pulling back her fist and steadying her nerves.
The news left the group stunned.
"May this subordinate be so bold as to ask: against which race?" Qing Lan inquired.
"Humans! The humans of this planet may lack mana, but they've developed all sorts of specialized weaponry. If you're not careful, you'll pay a heavy price! Especially since we're fighting on their home turf; we'll need to find our own ways to replenish mana. Otherwise, like me, your divine power will only dwindle every time you use it." Tanoxi waved her hand, looking like someone who had learned the hard way.
"Humans without mana? Truly hard to imagine," the old man muttered, stroking his chin thoughtfully.
"For example... look there!" Tanoxi pointed toward a specific spot in the sky. "Five seconds ago, at least three iron flies flew past that position. The humans of this planet call them 'satellites.' They seem capable of ultra-long-distance reconnaissance."
The group craned their necks, trying to spot the objects.
"...Lady Qing Lan, can you see them?" The old man squinted at the edge of the sky. Aside from clouds, he saw nothing.
"No. Except for clouds, I see nothing at all."
"I can't see them either," the little boy added, hanging his head in disappointment after several failed attempts.
"It's normal that you can't. Their position is higher than the sky itself," Tanoxi comforted them.
"Higher than the sky?!" the old man gasped.
"And that's not all. Many of their weapons can strike from places the naked eye cannot track, and they emit absolutely no mana fluctuations. Even I would suffer greatly if I were caught unprepared!"
With a flick of her wrist, a tablet flew out of her storage space. It floated in mid-air, automatically playing videos of humans operating machine guns and tanks firing shells. Then, the scene shifted: a massive iron bird soared through the sky and laid a black "egg." The egg struck a target, and a colossal mushroom cloud slowly rose. No matter how sturdy or tall the buildings were, they turned to dust under the shockwave. The earth became a living hell.
The group fell into a collective silence.
The strength of their Evil God was unquestionable. They hadn't submitted to her out of some boring sense of morality; she had simply beaten them all into submission. Having fought her, they understood the terrifying gap in power. If someone as powerful as her—someone they couldn't hope to catch up to in a lifetime of cultivation—said she would "suffer greatly," then how strong was the enemy?
How had the weak humans they once looked down upon mastered such devastating power? Even these powerhouses, who were lords in their original world, felt a shiver down their spines.
"No wonder they've survived this long without mana. Remarkable technology," Qing Lan said with genuine admiration.
"I'm telling you this so you can be mentally prepared and don't end up dying for some inexplicable reason. As for my loyal servant... remember, do *not* let anything slip. He doesn't know I'm preparing for war."
"Eh? Master Husband doesn't know?"
"He still seems to have an attachment to his human identity. If I asked him to strike down his own kind, he probably couldn't do it." Tanoxi looked a bit helpless. Though he wasn't obvious about it, to an Evil God who fed on human despair, his stance was as clear as day.
"Then... how should we interact with him? If he isn't completely loyal to you..."
"His words are my words! Remember, he is not just my puppet; he is my future husband. You must respect him as you respect me! At least... until the day he truly betrays me, you shall treat him as such."
"Understood!" they chorused, bowing their heads.
"But remember! I say he is the husband, so he is the husband. If I say he is not the King, he has no right to sit on the throne. Do you understand?"
"Yes!"
"Good. Let's go eat!"
---
"By the way, Qing Lan, come here for a second."
"?"
Tanoxi let the others walk ahead while she and Qing Lan lagged behind. To prevent the others from eavesdropping, she specifically cast a barrier to seal their conversation. Qing Lan couldn't help but wonder what her master had to say in such secrecy.
"Umm... Qing Lan... are you still... 'intact'?"
Hearing Tanoxi's shy, hesitant question, Qing Lan froze for a few seconds before her face flushed a deep crimson.
"O-Of course! This humble one is still... a maiden..." Though she started with some heat, as if trying to prove her dignity, her voice grew smaller and smaller until the last few words were barely a whisper.
Tanoxi let out a long sigh of relief. "Is that so? That's great!"
"???" *What's so great?*
"Qing Lan, this is a bit hard to talk about, but... I need your help with something!"
"...I am listening."
"If... and I mean *if*! If my loyal servant truly performs a great service for me, then as his master and his God, I must respond to his expectations, right?" Tanoxi leaned in close to Qing Lan, her cheeks glowing pink.
"Yes, of course!"
"So... you see... although I always mock him for being a virgin... the truth is... I also... well, what I'm trying to say is!"
"?" Even Qing Lan, who had faced death many times on the battlefield, couldn't help but swallow hard in this suffocating atmosphere.
"...When the time comes, I want you to 'lead the charge.' If you go first, I'll be more confident. I probably... won't be as nervous then."
".......EHHHHHHHHH?!!!!!"
Upon hearing her master's request, Qing Lan's mind went completely blank. Then, a scream loud enough to shatter the heavens echoed within the tiny barrier, refusing to fade for a very long time...