[Okay, here's a chapter cuz I feel generous, but no chapter tomorrow this time.]
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Somewhere in the academy, at the empty back of the building where nobody ever came unless they wanted to avoid people, two individuals were having a conversation that was probably more important than whatever useless lesson was happening inside.
"I told you to let me heal it, and now you got a scar on your face." Tsunade said to me with worry and a slight blush that she tried to hide by looking at the ground.
"It's not time for this, Tsuna. We have better things to talk about." I said lazily while looking down at her, watching her put her hands on her hips like she was about to give me a lecture.
"Better things like what exactly?" She raised her eyebrow, clearly not buying it.
"Like how I was talking to my parents yesterday, and I wanted to get your permission to visit your clan compound and have a talk with you and your grandma about me asking for you to officially be my fiancée. Of course, only if you agree to it." I said to the now dazed blushing mess standing in front of me, her brain clearly short-circuiting.
*Blush blush blush.*
I watched Tsunade's face turn from pink to red to tomato red in the span of about three seconds, her mouth opening and closing like a fish that forgot how to fish.
"So what do you say? Do you have a problem you want to tell me?" I asked, keeping my voice casual even though I was enjoying this way more than I should.
*Shake shake.*
She shook her head so fast I thought it might fly off. "I...I...I D...Don't h...have a problem." She replied shyly while stuttering hard enough that I was worried she might bite her tongue.
"Then we will immediately get ready to visit, but tell me when should we come?" I asked again with a beautiful smile that I knew for sure was making her even more flustered.
"M...maybe after t..three days you can." She said while looking sideways shyly, her hands twisting together behind her back.
*Pat pat.*
"Okay then, expect our arrival, princess." I said while patting her head twice with my huge hand, which made her blush even more and nod shyly, her whole body practically vibrating.
I turned around to leave for the remaining useless classes that I still had to sleep through, already planning what I was going to do for the next three days.
-----------
Later After Academy/
"Dude, you trying to go hoop?"
I turned to look at Ken "You talking to me?"
"It's not like I'm looking dead at you or anything." Ken replied with a roll of his eyes.
"What's up?" I raised an eyebrow.
"Well you know, the stuff." Ken replied.
"I don't know anything or stuff, elaborate." I said, a little annoyed.
"Hang out with the bros."
"What are you talking about?" I looked in confusion.
He shrugged. "I just thought you'd rather hang out with your new little girlfriend instead."
"Dude." I deadpanned.
He shook his head. "You got your priorities straight. You'd rather be cuddled up at night with some new little street skank hoe. That's fine, we get it man."
I gave a light glare, "She is soon to be my fiancée, watch it."
Ken made a mocking smile. "Hey, good for you, man. You do you, you know? I guess just because you put some stupid ring on the finger, that means you can't cuddle with us bros no more."
"..." This dumbass.
"All it takes is some nice looking blonde lady for you to switch up on us."
"Nobody switched up on you, bruh."
"I'm actually gonna say you will choose your kids over us for sure." Ken said.
"Actually, I do. That's my kids dumbass." I replied as a matter of factly.
"What, it's because they call you daddy or something? I could do that too." Ken's voice pitched higher. "Daddy~"
"Stop."
"Daddy~ will you leave me daddy?!"
"..."
"Daddy~ I love you daddy you know that daddy!"
"..."
"Daddy~ I don't care daddy, just don't leave me daddy, you can even take my virgi– okayyy I shut up sheesh you are no fun!"
I glared hard at Ken who started to whistle and look away. My hand was raised to punch but unfortunately, he went silent.
"Fiancée?" Yuji asked lazily.
"Yeah, already agreed and her grandmother approved." I replied to Yuji.
"Well damn! You are so lucky you know?" Ken suddenly turned and said.
"Why?"
"Why? You literally pulled the princess of this whole village and one of the most important persons in maybe the whole world in the bag!" Ken exclaimed with exaggeration.
"So?"
"You can't say 'so?' Also, do you know how many suitors have come forward to Tsunade and were rejected??" Ken asked with a deadpan.
"How many?" I asked boredly.
"2 whole generations! The previous one and the present. Civilians, nobles, kings, sons of Samurai Hatamotos, children of Daimyos, every single one were rejected with a punch to their damn faces!" Ken cried.
"Mhmm, skill issue." I said with a shrug.
"Oh my gosh!" Ken put his hands on his face.
Yuji and Satoshi just observed our conversation.
"Anyways, so guys, can you please come to my house tonight? My mom has been urging me to invite you for weeks now, and she cooked something for this dinner too!" I said tiredly to Ken, Yuji and Satoshi, who were all standing around me like they had nothing better to do.
From afar, it looked weird that a giant muscle man was talking to a bunch of kid looking dudes, but whatever.
"Count me in." Ken said nonchalantly with his hands behind his head, like he was doing me a favor.
"Daifuku-san! You really done so much for my clan, I am so grateful to you! So I will gladly come!" Satoshi said like a diehard fan with literal images of food appearing in his eyes, which weirded us out more than a little.
"What did Garou do for your clan, Satoshi?" Ken asked Satoshi with genuine curiosity, leaning in like he was about to hear some juicy gossip.
"Nothing, you will know later." I replied quickly while putting my finger on my mouth, meaning for Satoshi to be quiet, and he nodded immediately with a smile that was way too innocent for someone who had almost ruined my business secret.
"Yeah whatever, but I will come only with a condition." Yuji said with an unusual excitement that made me raise my eyebrow.
"What condition?" I asked with a frown, already suspicious of whatever scheme his lazy brain had cooked up.
"You still haven't taught me the sleeping technique." He said with expectation visible on his face, his tired eyes actually bright and watery.
"Bro, for how long were you waiting to ask me this?" I said and asked with a raised eyebrow, genuinely curious how long he had been sitting on this.
"I better not tell you that." Yuji replied with his lazy self coming back, and I just shrugged at his response.
'Well, not that it's that useful anyways.' I thought to myself about the sleeping technique.
If Yuji had heard what I was thinking about this technique, he would have literally puked blood at my stupidity and died on the spot.
"By the way, I have been doing some business with the Akimichi and I would like to visit the Nara clan head later, can you inform your father about this and arrange a day for a meeting?" I asked.
"Sure, no big deal." Yuji replied with a raised eyebrow.
'A business with the Akimichi? Is he going to open a gym or something?' Yuji asked himself.
"Thanks."
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In the Hokage Office/
"So what do you think about him?" Hiruzen asked a ninja who was kneeling in front of him, his pipe resting in his hand.
"His potential increased to high chunin, Hokage-sama. And I doubt it will go higher than that." The ninja replied with certainty.
"Hmm, pity. I thought he was special, but it seems it's his fate to be like that." Hiruzen muttered to himself in disappointment, already mentally crossing out the Hatake boy from his list of useful assets.
"But..." The ninja said and paused, waiting for Hiruzen's attention to come back to him.
"But?" Hiruzen said in confusion, leaning forward slightly.
"Lately, he and Princess Tsunade have been very intimate with each other. And yesterday I saw him going inside the Senju compound with her, Hokage-sama." The ninja said without much emotion, but the weight of the words hung in the air.
Hiruzen narrowed his eyes, his mind quickly running through all the possible reasons why that boy would be in the Senju compound.
"Do you think Mito-sama is involved in him being there?" Hiruzen asked, his voice carefully neutral.
"It's a possibility, Hokage-sama." The ninja replied, keeping his head low.
"Hmm, then look after the boy as usual and find out the reason why he is spending so much time with my disciple. Understood?" Hiruzen said with his eyes narrowed, his pipe forgotten in his hand.
"Hai, Hokage-sama." The ninja replied immediately with his head lowered.
"You can go now." Hiruzen dismissed the ninja, who quickly left in a cloud of smoke.
'Should I send Dan sooner?' Hiruzen thought to himself while looking at the Hokage mountain through the window, the stone faces of the previous Hokages staring back at him.
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Dinner Time at My House/
"So here are my friends," I said to my parents who were looking at the three boys with warm smiles while the three were smiling back awkwardly. I definitely knew how it felt to be in their place, which made me smile in ridicule at them.
"Can you introduce them to us, son?" Gintoki said, leaning back in his seat.
Surprisingly, not calling me Zombie.
Seems the term is exclusive to use only by him and he doesn't want it to spread to outsiders. Definitely not because he respects me.
"Yeah, this big guy is Satoshi Akimichi, the son of the Akimichi clan head. The lazy one with eye bags is Yuji Nara, the son of the Nara clan head. And the average looking blonde is Ken, the son of the Yamanaka clan head." I said with a smile while getting death stares from the two obvious ones who did not appreciate being described as "lazy" and "average looking."
*Clap clap clap.*
My mom clapped in delight while looking at the three of them like they were puppies she wanted to adopt. "My son is not that brute loner anymore, sob sob." My mom said with tears.
"Please don't say that, Ramen-san. Daifuku-san is my idol. He is really a good friend to me and my Akimichi clan." Satoshi said with a huge smile which made my parents look at him in amusement.
"Oh, and why is that, Satoshi-kun?" My dad asked in intrigue, leaning forward with interest.
"Shh, Satoshi, I will tell them about that matter myself." I said before Satoshi could reveal my business plan with the Akimichi clan.
I know Gintoki will go nuts if he knew I am planning to use his money to open up restaurants.
"Ok, Daifuku-san!" He immediately said with a salute that made his stomach jiggle from the sudden movement.
"Okay now, the food will get cold. So let's go and eat." My mom said with a smile, already moving toward the dining room.
"Ohh, food." Satoshi said, suddenly much more focused.
"Thanks, ma'am." ×2 from Ken and Yuji.
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2 Days Later at the Senju Compound/
We were now in front of Mito wearing official clan clothes that had the Hatake emblem on our backs and fronts, looking formal for the first time since forever.
"So we meet again, brats." Mito said while looking at me and my parents with a smirk that told me she was enjoying this way too much.
Both my parents immediately knelt in front of her with serious faces, their heads lowered.
"Mito-sama." ×2
"Ara ara, you don't need to kneel." Mito said while covering her mouth with her long kimono sleeve, her eyes crinkling with amusement.
*Shiver.*
"We are sorry, Mito-sama." ×2. Both my parents stood up with fearful expressions while I just looked at them in interest. Whatever Tobirama and Mito had done to them, it clearly left scars.
"Hoho, Tsunade told me that you guys are here to take her away from me. Is that true?" Mito said to my parents while patting Tsunade under her hand. Tsunade was wearing a gorgeous green kimono with flowers adorning it, her hair falling loosely to her shoulders without her usual twin tail style, looking like she had stepped out of a painting.
She was stealing glances at me with a huge blush, which I responded to with a predatory grin that made her blush even harder.
"First, I am sorry if my son showed any rude behaviour towards you that day he visited you, Mito-sama. He told us what happened." My dad said with an apologetic tone, bowing slightly.
'Liar, he doesn't give a single damn, Mito.' I thought as I looked at the actor.
"It's quite alright. I actually took a liking to him. He is quite a unique... guy." Mito said while giving me a small smile, which I just jutted my jaw forward at as if asking 'whatcha mean by that pause, woman?'
"Did you apologise to Mito-sama?" My mom said to me with a red intimidating aura surrounding her that made the air feel heavy.
"Nahh, she is chill." I said nonchalantly while glancing at Mito, who was giving me eye smiles.
"I am so sorry, Mito-sama." My mom said as she sweated at what I said.
"It's okay. It's not that usual for someone to not be intimidated of me. It's refreshing, so let him be." Mito said with her usual smile, waving her hand dismissively.
*Cough cough.*
"Okay so, Mito-sama." My dad said, clearing his throat. "Some days ago, my stupid boy came home and told me that he was interested in your granddaughter. So as a parent, I feel responsible for the happiness of my own son. Today I came here with my wife to talk about this matter with you, and I hope you agree to our request to become a part of your family through our children here. Of course, only if your granddaughter agrees to my son becoming her fiancé." My father said, the whole time his eyes closed and his head lowered, which surprised me.
'He can speak normally?' I thought in surprise. 'At least he didn't embarrass us. I expected much worse.'
"Hoho, Gintoki! You don't need to be so serious. It's not like you. If my granddaughter has no problem, then there's no need to talk further into this matter. Now can you two go to the other room and talk about this yourselves? I need to talk with Ayaka and Gintoki." Mito said while looking at me and Tsunade, who nodded and looked at me as if telling me to follow her, which I did.
As we got out of the huge hall we were in, the heavy doors closing behind us, I turned to Tsunade with a smile.
"So what's up, princess?" I said, watching her face light up.
"I feel great." She replied with a small blush and smile.
"Let's just go to the room and have a talk." I said with a smile while glancing at Tsunade, who was oblivious to my intentions.
*Step step step.*
*Klok.*
As the door closed behind us, Tsunade turned to face me with her hands clasped in front of her. "And, here we are. So what should we talk about?" She said as we entered an empty room and she closed the door, looking around nervously.
They were... alone.
"Probably our future and what your answer is to this whole stuff." I replied with a shrug.
She looked at me for some seconds before smiling mischievously as she suddenly became more confident.
"Impress me and I will agree." She suddenly said with that mischievous smile.
"Impress you? What am I? A clown?" I asked with confusion. Ignoring the phantom of Gintoki on my shoulder saying yes.
"Anything will do. Just impress me." She said with that smirk still on her face, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.
I stood there for a moment and started thinking.
Words? Poems? Dancing? Showing off my techniques?
They all felt too gay for my tastes. Maybe except showing off my techniques.
Hmmmmmm, I remember something Ken had mentioned the other day, something about how Tsunade always stared at my arms when she thought I wasn't looking. How she'd get that glazed look in her eyes whenever she saw my muscles flex under my shirt.
'Wait a minute.' I thought as an evil grin spread across my face. 'This girl is basically simping for my muscles.'
I stepped back from her, putting about six feet of distance between us.
"What are you doing?" Tsunade asked, confused.
"Art."
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes.
Then I reached up and grabbed the collar of what I was wearing with both hands.
*Rip.*
I tore it right down the middle, the fabric falling away to reveal my torso underneath. Tsunade's eyes went wide, her face instantly turning crimson.
"W-WHAT ARE YOU—"
"Shushhhhh." I silenced her.
I just let the shredded shirt fall to the floor and took a wide stance, feet planted firmly on the wooden floor. My muscles became visible with all their glory.
I started with a simple bicep curl pose, my right arm coming up slow and controlled, the peak of my bicep rising like a mountain. Every fiber defined. And then I flexed slowly, deliberately, watching Tsunade's eyes track the movement.
"I call this one... The Front Double Bicep." I said with my voice low.
I brought both arms up, hitting the pose perfectly. My lats spread wide, my chest expanded, and my arms peaked like I was carved from granite.
Tsunade made a sound that was somewhere between a squeak and a gasp.
I transitioned smoothly into the Side Chest pose, turning my body to show the thickness of my arms. I flexed my chest, making the muscles dance under my skin.
*Gulp.*
I heard her swallow hard.
I hit the Rear Double Bicep next, turning around to show her the full map of my back. Every muscle was defined, from my traps down to my lats, creating the shape of a cobra. My rear delts popped, my rhomboids created valleys and peaks, my spine was a canyon between two mountains of muscle.
I don't have scoliosis by the way, it's Dragon Ball glazers spreading propaganda about me. Hating the fact that I could just go Goku mode to beat Goku in my comsic form.
"Behind every great man, is a back that can carry the world." Socrates is my bitch bro.
[Picture]
I heard her take a shaky breath.
Tsunade's mouth was hanging open now, her face a shade of red that I didn't think was humanly possible.
I finished with the Most Muscular. I brought my arms together, flexing everything at once, creating that classic crab pose. Veins were popping everywhere, my abs were a washboard, my serratus looked like rows of fingers gripping my ribs.
Then I relaxed, standing up straight and running a hand through my hair.
"So," I said, my voice back to normal, "did that impress you?"
Tsunade was frozen. Her hands were clamped over her mouth, her eyes were wide as dinner plates, and I could see actual steam rising from the top of her head.
"I... I... I..." She tried to form words, but nothing coherent came out.
I walked toward her slowly, my bare feet padding on the wooden floor. When I was close enough to feel the heat radiating off her face, I leaned down so my eyes were level with hers.
"Is that a yes?" I asked softly.
Her eyes darted down to my chest, then back up to my face, then down to my arms, then back up again.
*Nod.*
She nodded. Just once, barely perceptible, but I caught it.
"Say it." I said, my voice a low rumble.
"Y-yes." She whispered, her voice cracking.
"I didn't hear!"
*Nod.*
She nodded again, stronger this time. "Yes. I agree."
I grinned, and before she could react, I scooped her up in my arms like she weighed nothing.
"HEY! WHAT ARE YOU—" She started, but her protests died in her throat when she realized her face was pressed against my bare chest.
She went completely rigid for a moment, and I could feel her pulse hammering through her whole body. Then, slowly, she relaxed. Her hands came up and pressed flat against my pectorals.
"...S...soft." She murmured, almost to herself.
"What?" I asked.
"Your chest." She said, her voice muffled against my skin. "It's... soft. Like a pillow."
"Hehe, I can manipulate the muscles to be whatever I want. Hard like steel, soft like clouds."
She pulled back just enough to look up at me, her face still crimson but her eyes clear. "You can do that? How is that biologically possible?!"
"Biology? What's that?" I replied dismissively.
I carried her out of the room, her legs dangling over my arm, her hands still pressed against my chest like she was afraid to let go. As I walked, she started poking at my muscles with her fingers, tracing the lines of my abs, squeezing my bicep.
"This one." She said, pointing at my left bicep. "Do the thing again."
I flexed without breaking stride, and she let out a little gasp, her fingers tracing the peak.
"That's insane." She breathed. "How is this possible? You don't even use chakra."
"Training, protein, sleep. Nothing that deep girl." I replied.
"Hmmmm, if you don't wanna tell me then don't but I will soon know anyway, I don't like secrets between us. I like the scar too by the way. It makes you look dangerous."
"Chicks dig scars." I said with a shrug.
"No I am not!" Tsunade responded.
"I didn't mean you, but your grandma."
"Heyyy! Be nice!"
"No."
As I entered the hall with a barely functioning Tsunade latched onto my bare chest, all conversation stopped. My mother's face went through about twelve different emotions in three seconds, my father choked on his tea, and Mito looked like she was trying very hard not to laugh.
"What happened?! And why are you bare-chested?!" My mom asked with a dark aura surrounding her, her eyes fixed on the way Tsunade was practically melting against my skin.
"Zomb–Son??" My dad was looking at me weirdly with concern, his eyebrow raised so high it was almost at his hairline. Probably thinking I have crossed some taboo line.
"Ah, it's nothing." I said with a proud smirk. "We just talked and she agreed to be my fiancée, so I gave her a small demonstration of what she's signing up for, and then she suddenly became like this."
Mito's eye twitched. 'Small demonstration my perky ass. But... those muscles though,' I could practically hear her thinking.
"THAT'S GREAT!!" My mom yelled in joy, forgetting the insane muscles dancing in front of their eyes, some tears welling up in her eyes as she clasped her hands together.
I looked at my dad, who just gave me a calm disgusted proud smile, if you could call it that, and a subtle nod that told me everything I needed to know, which is to not drag him to shitty formalities like this again.
Apparently, Gintoki is being forced to play goodie two-shoes, and he was reaching his yearly limit.
"Then this calls for a celebration! For now, you can go back until some time, and then I will tell a ninja to inform you of the time of the engagement." Mito said with her grandmotherly smile, reaching out her arms.
I approached Mito and carefully peeled Tsunade off my chest. She made a small sound of protest, her hands still trying to grab onto me even as Mito took her.
"Come back soon." Tsunade murmured, her voice dreamy.
'Seems my charms are insane.' I proudly thought.
"No." I barely heard Gintoki mutter while deadpanning at me without explanation. I swear this dude can read minds.
"Whatever you say, princess." I replied to Tsunade with a grin, ignoring the asshole.
Then me and my parents slowly said our goodbyes and headed home, my mom still crying tears of joy the whole way, my dad trying to figure out how his Zombie had become some kind of muscle god, and me walking through the streets of Konoha shirtless and not caring one bit.
The End.
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