"Speech"
'Thoughts'
["Speech Through Technology"]
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…
[Before the start of the battle of the selves.]
I always wondered, what is it that maketh the man?
In my life, I lived directionlessly. I toiled away with only the goal to please another. I thought that the way I lived was simply how life ought to be.
I was wrong.
In my lowest moment, I gave up everything for a chance of uncertain understanding. In doing so, I awoke.
I was surrounded by parents, a brother, and extended family I had never dreamed of in my wildest dreams. It was at that moment, living for a week within that world, that my eyes opened.
The people around me, the family around me, made me better. It made me want to be better. For what was I, an independent person, but an aimless individual?
In my want, my drive, for the betterment of my own, I came across one being that changed me for the better.
Jesus Christ.
I became, not obsessed, but overcome with the idealization of myself. For what am I if not able to stand by the lessons taught to me for my betterment?
So, I questioned. And eventually, I asked, "Is God real?"
God had to be real.
If not, why was it that these beautiful things existed?
Stars.
Bright balls of gas, they lit up the night sky. Dotted every last inch of what was able to be seen. They came in all forms, neutron, white dwarf, brown dwarf, massive and orange, and even became black holes.
The time I spent in this world has taught me lessons.
"Love thy neighbor as you love thyself."
And yet, I stole from myself. I had everything I had ever dreamed of, yet I could not live with it. For the lessons he taught me, I knew I had earned none of it.
I had stolen everything from a man who rightfully deserved it. If I claimed to harbor his words, hear his voice, and understand what it means to be better, how could I lie to myself?
I must give back what I have stolen. Only then can I grow past the person who thought they had lost it all.
If I wanted to stand as tall as he once did, if I wanted to define the world in pure, unadulterated light, I had to amend my faults.
For not even the prophets are born as they are. All is a journey. A journey for betterment, a journey of choice, and a journey that allows the conversion to flow rather than deathly silence.
So, as I walked down this street, I reminded myself.
I always wondered, what is it that maketh the man?
Was it character?
Was it actions?
Was it thoughts?
Was it purpose?
I realize now. What maketh the man isn't any one of those.
It is all of them.
It is character!
It is purpose!
It is actions!
It is thoughts!
It is ideal!
What maketh the man is the man himself wanting to become better out of his own freewill.
I had given up the stolen essence of a man once great. All that remained was to return it to him. For I, Dante Azaogdesz, was many things.
But, even with it all, I know this is only the beginning of the journey I need to undergo to stand as tall as he once did.
"Hey!" I tried my best to be happy at our technical reunion. "It's been a long time, hasn't it?"
He looked hollow, this new Dante. I knew his original name, and I even lived it. However, I did not speak it, for it was not mine to utter.
His shirt was torn in specific areas. The ideal outcome I had hoped to find with him fell through. His eyes seemed almost empty, his face completely different from the dead look his eyes gave.
"You can't be serious." His voice was dumbfounded, unable to handle the weight of my return.
"I'm super serious!" I could feel the smile growing as I spoke. The idea that I would right my wrong, grow as a person, and set out to help with the betterment of others, causing me to have a fully authentic, peaceful smile.
"That can't be you, Original Dante?" I could see the cogs in his head turning, trying to reason my existence.
But, is that what he seriously referred to me as? I would keep it. After all, it is a name and a title he has given to me despite my shortcomings.
"What are you doing here?" He practically spat. It was obvious he was aggravated.
"Whoa, relax. I'm here with good news!" I said, as I raised my hands in a gesture of goodwill.
"Fine, say what you want—*cough* *cough*" This new Dante couldn't finish his sentence as he coughed like a dying lung cancer patient.
Was he sick? Dying with some type of new disease? I could only look suspiciously at him. If he were dying, then I needed to be quick about sending him back home. I didn't want him to die before I could give him what had been stolen.
Anyways, I placed my hand on my hip and smiled, recalling how much I've changed.
"The time I spent as you has been enlightening. It's taught me more, not only about myself but about cherishing what one has." I let my words sink in, I saw new Dante's eyes go wide, and I continued. "I've learned much. That's why I want to give you your life back."
"What?" New Dante looked absolutely stunned.
I took in his look with a sense of pride. He definitely never expected me to come back, and I took that as a definite sign of my change for the greater.
"I said I wanted to give you your life back!" As I spoke, I could feel a laugh growing in my throat before I suppressed it. His genuine disbelief brought me closer to who I wanted to be. "You don't need to worry, I haven't done anything terrible in your world. I have simply gained a better understanding of what I want to be."
I decided to give more reasoning. I wanted him to understand me, grow with me, become greater than me, and enjoy life with a smile he looked to not have in a long time.
"I've always had questions, ideas, and even thoughts of more, but with how I was living, they were never answered. Going to your world, becoming you, living as a person within sunlight, has given me a new perspective, outlines, and even new responsibilities. I now understand that what I did to you was in no way a reflection of what I want my character to be. So, I have come to right my wrong, give to you what I have taken from you, and live as a better person, rather than talking about better people." The more I spoke, the lower his jaw got. It was funny only because I was able to fix this situation.
This new Dante took a step forward, before all but rushing at me. "How do we switch back?!" He shouted as quickly as he could.
I wanted to give him his life back as fast as he did, but the truth was, he needed to be in the right state of mind. The return swap wasn't as easy as the first, and I needed a specific requirement to occur in order for him to return fully.
"As I said before, chill," I said calmly and concisely, trying to ease him into the method needed.
New Dante seemed to go through many emotions, his eyes, expression, and overall image telling a tale. I could tell, mostly because I lived as him.
He had probably made new friends, built new connections, and had people to rely on, and yet, I would be taking it all away again. I didn't want him to worry, to have to be split on going to where he'd should've always been.
"I know that look." A sad but knowing smile graced my face. "You've met someone and don't want to leave them, right?"
"Yeah," New Dante looked around, contemplating. "Something like that."
There was so much on his plate, yet he still thought about the people around him. Comparing myself to him filled me with such complex emotions that I didn't even know where to start. I guess it shows me how far I still have to go.
I truly didn't want him to worry. I wanted him to know that I was, honestly, truthfully grateful for the time I spent being him.
"I'll handle it, but before that." Right as I reminisced on my time growing as a person, I remembered something and sighed heavily. "Who the fuck takes four computer science classes at once?! Who allowed you to do that? They really had me fucked up with that!"
Those four classes that I had to take had to have been the worst, and I mean the WORST time of my life. To put it into words, I had to do computer science classes 1, 2, 3, and 4, WITHOUT KNOWING ANY OF THEM!
New Dante groaned in exasperation, facepalming softly. I could see his eyes looking up in his skull as if he forgot he had to take any of those classes.
"Look, it wasn't entirely my decision if I remember correctly." He shook his head. His breathing seemed labored from doing something, I don't know. "Anyways, it just happened. Enough of this, tell me how we swap back."
He seemed calm, so I guess it was time to rip the band-aid off.
"Alright, listen up." I was excited. I had spent a week trying to find a way to undo this before even returning. It wasn't entirely complicated to return him to his world. The problem was returning him to his body.
I didn't know if he wanted to go back to the exact moment he left or the moment I left for him, but considering he probably wanted to be in the same strand of timeline he was originally from, I decided to make it where I left for him.
And if that's the case, there's only one way to get him to return.
"It's not actually that complicated, super simple really. I'm going to have to kill you."
"What?"
From only the sound of his voice, I knew he wasn't taking it well. But from the wide-eyed blank thousand-yard stare he was giving me, I knew he really wasn't taking it well.
"Now I know that sounds bad!" I said quickly. Shrugging my shoulders softly, I then raised my hands to appear non-threatening.
To be honest, it really did sound bad. I was never any good with telling people bad news. Blame it on a lack of experience. But I was still going to try to help him understand why I had to do it.
"But at most you'll feel is a slight pain, and then it should be—"
I immediately jumped backwards, having to land in a backflip because of my lack of balance when I jumped. My eyes were wide.
This new Dante had just tried to take my head off! His eyes were wide, feral-looking. He breathed deeply through his mouth, but his eyes stayed wide despite the seeming tiredness he had.
"Dude, what the fuck?!" I shouted in confusion. New Dante put his free hand against his face, his eyes staying uncovered. I couldn't believe he had just tried to kill me.
I understood how it looked, I understood I could've been misunderstood, but an instant attack aimed at killing me before I could finish explaining? 'Why?'
I only wanted to give back what I took from him. It made no sense why he'd act like this! And as I tried thinking why he would act so irrationally before even hearing my explanation, my rage, guilt, and frustration grew.
"I came back to right my wrong! And this is the thanks I get?!" It was like I had tried everything to go onto the right path. I had wanted to be better, tried to be better, and tried to use my words.
New Dante mumbled something inaudible, but I couldn't entirely pay attention.
Unzipping my hood, I let it fall to the ground before I caressed my neck softly. My hands were lightly shaking while the rest of my body was entirely unbothered.
'No good deed goes unpunished.' I thought as I realized I might've almost got my just desserts.
I was wrong.
Not in trying to be a good person. I was wrong in my approach. 'I see now that you're too far gone in a direction I can never travel.'
He wasn't a member of society anymore. He wasn't someone I could converse with solely for the purpose of finding equal ground in realization.
He was someone in survival mode. Someone who fought like humanity was still in the Stone Age. I still do not blame him, but I must answer him in kind.
I will bring him the life he has longed for. For not all good deeds are easy.
"You're a fool. I gave you a way back to your old life, and you tried killing me. But know this," As I spoke, I leaned back, finding myself in a comfortable pose. My five finger tips on my left hand pressed against the center of my chest, while my right hand rested on my hip.
'It was you who allowed me to find myself. It was you whom I took from. I do not blame you. I do not hate you, for you are me. So, with the power granted to me, gifted experience by you, I shall give unto you only what you thought impossible. Freedom.'
I couldn't transfer my thoughts to him, but I hoped he'd see my actions well.
"My power is not to be trifled with!" I shouted as I tried translating it to the best of my ability.
'Now, 『The World』.'
At that thought, the world drained of color. At least, it was as if I ate it all. Everything had frozen. The people, the air, the light, the sound, nothing moved.
Until I took a step.
In this moment of frozen time, I was king and absolute!
My steps were quick, but measured. My entire body moved with grace and flexibility.
'One second has passed.'
*Step*
*Step*
*Step*
The sound of my steps reverberated in the pure, unmovable, profoundness of my will.
'Two seconds have passed.'
I stopped my walk right when I passed the new Dante's position. I was only a foot away, and he was none the wiser.
'Three seconds have passed.'
Doing a sharp 180-degree turn, smoothly, I placed my left hand on my hip.
And despite this, new Dante lay entirely unmoved. Unable to even understand what had happened.
'Time has begun to move again.'
The instant I allowed time to flow, color returned, and new Dante did a 180-degree turn, swinging his blade at me as fast as he—
'『The World』'
And he froze once more.
I walked past him once more, but as I passed him, a golden glow left my body. It quickly formed into a humanoid shape, and a golden humanoid floated over new Dante.
It stood at my exact height of 6'2, was entirely yellow-gold besides a few parts, and had a headpiece that covered the top half of its face to its nose, slanting at an angle. On the back of its hands and shoulders were clocks; twin, ridged, and puffed straps went over both of its shoulders and covered both front and back. On its back were two oxygen tanks that had two pipes connecting from them to the base of the sides of the neck. On its waist were two clock-like pieces attached to both sides. The knees had two red D's as knee guards, while on the chin, there was a heart shape that was also colored in red.
It shared my same build, slim but defined. There was an extra red heart right in the center of the waist, larger than the one on the chin.
'Get him, my stand.'
At that thought, The World pulled back its left arm as far as possible and punched new Dante through the stomach.
'That would be—what?' My eyes opened wide, The World's did too, as new Dante didn't have a hole through his stomach.
"That's not possible! The World punches at light speed, there should be a hole through your body!" The shock running through me couldn't be understated. I had meant to end this by tearing him in half in stopped time.
Sure, I could've gone for the head, but I didn't want to botch the job and send him back home with brain damage. I still wasn't entirely sure about the process, but—
"Tch." I sucked my teeth as I realized I didn't have time. "Time has begun to move again.
I placed both my hands on my hips as I thought over what to do.
*BANG*
The shockwave from my punch sounded out, and new Dante went flying backwards.
What do I realistically do? Maybe a barrage of punches, but he seemed too durable.
*HONNKKK*
*BOOM*
A large explosion took me out of my thoughts as I realized I had made a mistake. I didn't account for where he would land after my light-speed punch hit him.
Semi-merging The World into myself, I jumped forward through the air. I had accidentally killed people already. This whole thing was bad, it really was my—no. A conflict will always have sacrifices that need to be made. Yes, it was my fault, but now that this conflict has started, I needed to end it as fast as possible.
"What are you guys doing?! Run away!"
I heard him, new Dante shouted, and I immediately stopped time. Running over, he had already stood up.
"The World!" As soon as I shouted, The World came from my torso, hands close to its face.
"WRRRYYYYY!" The stand cried out before landing three of the most powerful, diabolical chest punches I had ever seen. Each punch sounded like a ballistic missile landing.
Merging my stand into my body again, I jumped into the air.
'Time has begun to move again!'
The instant time started, a massive amount of wind blasted out, and new Dante flew backwards into house after house, having dropped his sword.
I followed behind as quickly as I could. Running through the Dante-shaped holes he put into multiple houses, I found myself in a frankly hilarious situation.
"Look at you!" I couldn't help but shout with laughter. "Head in their seafood salad, ass in their macaroni!"
It was exactly as I saw it; he was lying on a table filled with food, the same food the family who owned the table wanted to eat. I, who was now crouched on the same table, stood and began to walk closer.
New Dante immediately tried to sit up, only to be put back down by The World. Two punches landed squarely on his face.
"Now, now!" I grabbed a handful of macaroni that he had sat in. The family that had made this put a lot of time into making it; someone had to eat it. "We can't let this home-cooked meal go to waste, now, can we?"
The World grabbed him, and together with my stand, we began forcefully feeding new Dante the macaroni.
He tried throwing a punch, only for it to be swatted away by The World. I made sure The World landed another punch for good measure.
"Come on, didn't it taste good? That's not guest hospitality, Dante!" As I shouted, the family who had been watching our fight had begun to leave.
I felt sorry for them. There was nothing I could do for their ruined meal. The only thing I could do was make sure it didn't go to waste. I didn't want their effort to be wasted; I didn't want them to think they did all that work for the world to see it as useless.
So, as I saw the only person eating the food they made not enjoy it, I could only feel a bit frustrated. I was trying to speak his language, and I seemed to be failing in this, too. "They put so much time and effort into this food, why are you so unappreciative of their effort?!"
'I couldn't–nothing would—god I'm such a failure!' As frustration built within me, The World pulled back its fist and punched new Dante in the face, hard.
As he flew through the house, into another house, and so on, I held out my hand in his direction before clenching it.
I thought I could understand him, I thought I could speak his language, but it felt like no matter how I talked or tried, we spoke from two entirely separate places.
I walked after him, one hand on my hip. I saw him, embedded against a wall, unmoving. I grimaced, my mouth twisting in an uncomfortable expression.
Getting close, only a foot away, there was only one way I could get him to understand me. I needed results—
"GIO…?"
My eyes widened when he muttered the words on my headband. He was actually speaking to me, trying to reason.
"Ah, yes." I caressed the headband, reminiscing on spending time with a family that didn't belong to me, yet cherishing the moments nonetheless. "It does say GIO. One of my keepsakes from your world."
I had gotten it from a store that sold a bunch of anime items. I had gone there with his dad. The store manager said the headband was a defective product, but I thought it was beautiful nonetheless. It may not be comparable to the original, but it was still there, still made.
"GIO…?" New Dante muttered.
"GIO as in geography…? Geography relating to the world? The world revolving around you, around oneself? You must have the power to stop time."
Both of us stared at each other, the house as quiet as a pin drop, both of us in a deadpan expression.
'I had–I had actually thought I was getting through to you. I thought that maybe we could actually talk it out.'
"That's one hell of a reach, and you know it!" I shouted in rage. Pure revulsion filled me as I realized he was only talking to keep himself in this "fight."
"It's only a reach if I'm wrong. But I did reach, I reached for the right answer, and you're mad because of it." As he spoke, a whimsical "I got you" smile grew on his face.
The World promptly backhanded him.
'I want to talk to you. I want to understand you. I want for both of us to be proud to claim to be another version of each other.' An indescribable feeling clawed at my throat. 'But I can't talk to you! You don't respond with words! You're like a brick wall! You only respond to actions! I don't want to fight you, I don't want to beat on you, I just want you to be happy! I want you to be happy because—'
All I ever wanted was to be happy.
I never had a mother and father.
Finding out I took something I could never have from you, it broke me.
I took everything I ever wanted from myself.
How could I?
Something I thought impossible, I took from you.
And now, all I want to do is give you everything you think is impossible.
I want to be the you who believes in the best me.
But you make that impossible.
Why are you like this?
Why did I do this to you?
I always thought that if I met myself, we would be the best of friends. I would trade everything for another me, not even a family; a family was too far-fetched a miracle to me.
But—
I found myself watching the world through my stand, its hands slowly wrapping around new Dante's neck.
—The only way I can give unto you a miracle I shall never obtain again—
"You're much more sadistic than I thought you'd be!" New Dante's eyes were wide as he shouted with everything he could. He looked to still be in the fight, still in this song and dance.
But his words hit much harder than anything I've ever felt before. Shame, grief, guilt, shame, grief, guilt, shame, shame
Shame
Shame
SHAME
SHAME
"Sadistic?" My voice wavered, my strength wavered, my will wavered. "I say it's necessary, not sadistic."
I couldn't.
I couldn't do it.
I couldn't save—
"Nothing about this situation went the way it should have," I spoke aloud, allowing anyone to see my weakness.
I claimed to hear your message, to want to be a better person, to want to walk not in front of you, not behind you, but beside you.
Exactly as you do for humanity.Exactly as God in mortal flesh would do for anyone who wishes to be better.
But what do I—suddenly I remembered, my eyes widening slightly.
"'It is one thing to talk about better people, but another to become that better person you see. Seek a brighter path made by your own footsteps, rather than tread in anothers, in hopes of a better future.'" The way I spoke these words to myself was like nothing ever before. I treated them with the same weight I treated the world.
I, Dante Az—NO! I, Original Dante, will not let you be led blindly by nothing!
I will save you!
With my will finally gathered. I spoke with seriousness once more. "I'm ending this farce here and now. You see, unlike you, I understand when I've overstayed my welcome."
I quickly began strangling new Dante with The World. My grip tightening, he began struggling harder and harder.
I could see him slowly losing power, slowly being pushed back to a place he belonged.
'Goodbye friend—'
My eyes widened as a force gripped my hand—it gripped The World's hands!
"That's not possible!" I shouted in disbelief.
Only after an absolute philosophical, mental, and idealistic moment was I able to gain a stand. But, right now. Right here!"
"This is my stand!"
New Dante posed against the wall he was embedded in, and I realized what monumental moment he must have gone through for this to happen.
『The World』
...
(A/N: I don't know how to start this, but here goes nothing. As you may know, I am not very consistent. I would like to say it's entirely because I'm lazy and don't care, but I can't. The entire time I've been uploading EMC/Eldritch May Cry, I've been going through college, which is crazy to say because dropping 10 thousand-word chapters while also doing my midterms and finals had drained me so many times.
I'm still going through college, this should be my final year, but I can't find my thought process to write EMC while doing all of these asinine assignments. This is going to be a really long author's note, but I've come here to say that, through my burnout, I've found writing different things to be therapeutic in a way. So, here's what I'm going to do.
From here on out, I'll be writing 2,000 words every day. Through writing EMC, I found myself going through days writing nothing, and then suddenly writing 6,000 words in one day. It was really inefficient. So, here's hoping you get 60,000 words per month instead of one chapter. After that, I'll be answering three things.
1. "Do you plan on dropping this, or any of the other series that you've written?"
My answer to this is no. All of the stories I've written were training for a novel that I wanted to eventually write, but I didn't want to be like all the sickos on this app posting pure adulterous horror as if they were Slaanesh. I'll still keep posting EMC when I find time. However, many people want me to return Minecraft JJK.
Minecraft JJK was a series for my friends that I posted based on us, what we would do, and our beefs. So, when the "fight/game" ended, there was nothing more.
For those who still want it, I'll be rebooting it. It'll still be the Minecraft JJK you all came for, but it'll be better. It'll be for you.
No longer will I allow all of you to eat Chinese, AI, translation slop!! No more larpers! No more of this bullshit positive cursed energy being green instead of white! And most of all, NO MORE GETTING YOUR SIX EYES IN A FREAK ACCIDENT!!! Cursed energy control is hard, and it should stay that way!
I find myself wanting to write the original story that everyone has found me from, but I feel it's better to keep it the way it is as a way to track my growth.
2. "Will these series take away from EMC?"
No, not at all. I find Eldritch May Cry hard to write solely because I try to make everything perfect. There are specific things I want to happen. The idea that Dante will kill everyone in his path solely cause he has the power to is absolute insanity. Everyone has a personality, tone, and weight to them that I try to handle with extreme care. It mostly puts an absurd weight onto my back that I myself have placed there.
3. "What will the novel you're writing be about?"
I've learned a lot from writing the series I have. So, it would be terrible if I took all my eldritch horror, all my dreams and nightmares, and all of my opened eyes just for it to not be of use. I see the idea of Outer Gods being used all the time within this website, but they're so far from recognizing anything of what that truly means. I must show them how it's done. Call it whatever you desire, but if you give someone the powers of an Outer God, they better not be just a human with the power to steal other powers.
So, I hear you asking, "Give us a hint on what this series is about!" And, I only have one thing I can say to that.
Have you heard? Bloodborne is getting a movie.
And no, this doesn't count towards the 2,000 daily writing count. Also, webnovel will NOT be getting a contract out of me. Author, HopOffMe, out.)