"And that should be the last of it." Masha finished, dusting off her hands. "Every supernatural book I own, hopefully allowing you all to identify any earth threat that tries to kill you." Everyone had spent the last two weeks trying to help these guys prepare for their trip … well, most of them. Pearl mostly isolated herself after one of her reformation attempts nearly let Bismuth kill Vee … long story there.
"Nice. I wonder if we'll actually meet other magical creatures on the road." Vee smiled as she gathered the pack of books. "If imps from hell and aliens from space are real, who knows what else could be out there in the world, just waiting to see a friendly face."
"If we meet another gem, we're poofing them immediately." Lucci said as he placed a crate of food into the rv. "But I'd be open to supernatural friends."
"And hopefully some more environmentally friendly people instead of … well, gems and Belos." Willow said as she looked over everything. "Just once, I want to meet another living being that actively creates a stable environment instead of trying to completely decimate it."
"I'm just excited to meet more humans outside of Graves Field." Gus packed away a series of encyclopedias. "Imagine how differently they've evolved from living in another state."
"You're gonna be surprised." Luz nervously chuckled. "Anyway, I think you guys are gonna be alright. Between Vee and Sasha, you have enough human knowledge and money to make it."
"You say that like you're not coming." Amity said.
"You mean I'm supposed to let my mom raise a baby alone?" Luz asked. "I saw it when the Axolotl came around, and that did not end well. I'll just wait for you guys to get bac-" Ms. Noceda walked into the room, holding said little squirt. "Hey Mom, I was just telling my friends…why do you have my luggage with you?"
"Because I just finished packing all your clothes and supplies for the trip." The woman smirked, handing it over to the stunned girl. "You're going with your friends."
"But … but Dana-"
"I can handle it Luz." The woman assured her. "Connie said she'd help."
"Seriously?" Amity, Luz, and Lucci all asked, turning to the girl.
"I figured I'd make up for some … past actions." Connie said, looking away with some shame on her face.
Masha smirked as she turned to Vee. "You hear that, she's already training to be a mom for you."
"Masha.." The girl blushed a blue tint. "We haven't even all gone on a date yet."
"Vee!" Connie blushed. "Don't give Masha weird ideas."
"Why not? You know how cool I am with weird things."
"And now I am done with this conversation." Willow grumbled, walking away from them all.
"... So, what's Oregon like?" Gus decided to change topics.
"Not much different than over here, except much warmer." Camila answered.
"Oh thank titan!" Boscha suddenly shouted. "Did anyone else notice it was getting like, Knee levels of chilly lately?"
"That's what we call Winter, Boscha." Luz smirked. "We're on the east side of the country, so this side of the world gets a lot less sun during this time of year."
"Not to mention the water doesn't boil." Vee said. "We usually get weeks of snowfall."
"WEEKS?!" Boscha complained. "How the hell-" And a sandal was thrown at her face.
"Laguange, there's a baby in the room." Ms. Nosceda glared at the three eyed girl.
The little girl laughed, clapping her hands. "Aww, she loves violence." Lucci cooed. "She's already a clawthorne at heart." The boy tickled the girl's face. "Who's going to be a little troublemaker? You are, yes you are."
"Heh, Lucci, head to my room and pick up my Azura books before mom gets any ideas to change her mind." Luz pushed the boy into the hallway. Fun family.
"You sure about staying behind?" Vee asked, turning to Masha. "This is like the opportunity of a lifetime! A magical scavenger hunt across the country!""
"The opportunity of your lifetime, cutie pie. I'd rather make it more…personal if you know what I mean."
"I … I see." The girl blushed.
"In the meantime, me and Connie are going to get to know each other." Masha squeezed the other girl. "You know, make it roomy for when you come back." They were rewarded with the purring squeal the Basilisk made sometimes.
"If you're thinking this is going to change my mind about the polygamous thing, then you have a long road ahead of you." Connie rolled her eyes.
"I have all the time in the world from my perspective." She answered. "Do you really think that they're gonna finish this within less than a month?"
"No." Ms. Noceda answered. "Which is why Luz needs this trip. I want her to enjoy having a fun time with her friends instead of feeling guilty."
"Trust us, it's been …an effort." Amity sighed in exhaustion.
"So who are we bringing?" Hunter asked. "All of us, the palisman, doctor Waybright, Vee … are we including Spinel?"
"You bet you bupkis you are!" The rubbery gem's head stretched out from the window. "No way I'm gonna let my bestest best friend explore a world he hates without giving him something to smile about!"
"Great …" Boscha grumbled. "What about the Centipeetles running around?"
"I think we're letting them stay at the Barn with the Rubies." Gus answered.
"Are we sure we can keep up the ruse with corrupted gems around?" Amity asked. "The Cluster hasn't gone off in weeks past its date, and the Rubies haven't been supervised in a while."
"I can give them one last order for a 'training' exercise. That'll buy us a little more time." Hunter sighed. "Honestly, we're probably just gonna have to poof them sooner or later."
"Which will bring Yellow Diamond down on us …" Boscha sighed. "And if Blue was any indication, we'll be dead on arrival."
"Dead on what now?" Ms Noceda asked.
"Nothing important, let's just get everything into the rv."
=======================================================================
Sasha hugged her two best friends "See you guys when we get back." The kids had a lead on where to go for their hold portal door thing, and as a therapist, she felt like it was her duty to get them where they needed. After all, getting back home would do wonders for their mental health.
"Oh come on, first you drag us to a crazy town, now you ditch us?" Anne asked in a joking manner. "Make up your mind."
"Nah, you know how Sasha is. She uses us whenever she wants for her own convenience." Marcy snickered as she patted her on the back. "Over a decade and you haven't changed a bit."
"What can I say, it's how I roll." Sasha grinned with a light chuckle. "Just make sure the town doesn't blow up while we're gone."
"Oh what, you don't trust us?" Marcy asked with a smirk.
"No." Hunter said as he walked past.
"Not a bit." Willow said as she went into the RV.
"Disappointments all around." Boscha commented as she went in.
"We've known Sasha the longest, we'd trust her, but she's coming and we have little context about the two of you." Gus said.
"Plus the crystal mess ups are still here, and they put a wrench into any well thought out plan." Amity pointed out. "We're honestly expecting them to blow up the town into a crater, regardless of anything you two are capable of."
"... What faith." Anne deadpanned.
"Don't mind them, they're just antsy to get back home." Sasha waved off. "We all know how that was."
"Yeah, but I didn't treat my parents like jokes when I went back to Amphibia." Anne grumbled. "I had faith they could take care of things at home."
"Then you're one of the rare humans along with Luz that has good Bio parents." Lucci snickered. "Don't worry, I know you guys are musically capable. I only expect half the town to be blown up. Hopefully it's the half that Kevin lives on."
"... I trust you two." Vee patted the adults on the back.
"They're nicer than this, I swear." Luz chuckled. "Just…Just keep eyes on my mom and sis. If Mr. Universe is still living in town, I don't want him to get within a hundred feet of them."
"Yeah, we'll keep her safe." Anne patted the girl's back. "Oh, here she is now, you'd probably say your final words for a while."
"And here I thought kids knew about phones." Ms Noceda chuckled.
"Mom…" Luz hugged the woman tightly. "I can still stay if you want. It really wouldn't be any trouble-"
"Luz, your friends have struggled to understand life in this town in the past four months. I know Dr. Waybright is capable, but I doubt even she could keep them on that tight of a leash on a cross country trip." Camila smirked.
"They will probably break an international law or two." Sasha admitted.
"Which is why you being there will do them some good…and I know for a fact you'd regret it for the rest of your life if you missed an opportunity like this." Camila rubbed her oldest child's head.
"I'll … do my best to enjoy it." Luz chuckled, before looking down at Dana. "Don't you worry, you adorable dumpling, I'll be back before you know it." Luz tickled the baby's face.
"Gawa."
"I'll bring back a national monument as a souvenir." Lucci patted the kid's head.
"Yaawaaa." They held out their arms, placing her tiny hands on each of their faces.
"So much precious energy." Luz cooed. "Adorable little one."
"That's going to serve her well when she's pickpocketing…I can see her stealing her first wallet already…"
"Okay, let's get on board, Lucci, before you say anything else." Luz shoved the boy into the bus. "I can't promise that he might end up wanted in at least two states by the time this is all over."
"... I'll do my best." Please let the law be the last of their worries.
=======================================================================
"HHHGG!" Hunter felt his stomach lurch once more, already moving his head out of the window. It's been non stop ever since they moved. At first they thought it was poison … then the truth came out.
"Hahahaha!" And Clawthorne refused to hide how much amusement he found in watching Hunter get motion sickness. "You fight gem monsters, you can ram a sword through my gut, but sitting down while moving in a slightly larger than normal car….that's what defeats the former Golden Guard!" The boy cackled, rolling on the floor. "I didn't even need to poison you with my birthday cake, I just needed to steal a bus pass and put you on it!"
"How long are you-mmm." He vomited out the window, before looking back. "You planning … on milking this?"
"I dunno … probably a week." The kid snickered. "Say, did you know that it's impossible to stay even on a moving bus, we're always tilting left and right."
Hunter felt his stomach curl. "Lucci, stop rubbing it in." Vee pouted at Clawthorne. "Can't you just be content with him feeling miserable without adding salt to the wound?"
"Again, the point of the song I wrote was that I never stay content." Lucci smirked. "At this point, I shall do whatever I please until it stops bringing me amusement." Great, as if his ego and sense of empathy weren't devolving as it was. It was like watching Luz in reverse.
"Twisted logic aside, he kind of has a point." Gus rubbed his head. "You teleport all the time, how is moving in a car more nauseous for you?" He asked.
"Not to mention we play flier derby." Captain brought up. "All the high speed flying shouldn't be a problem."
"Chirp." Flapjack would never do anything to harm Hunter.
"It's the consistent mundaness of sitting down." Sasha said as she spoke from the driver's seat. "Doing nothing for a long period of time while in a vehicle that hardly changes speeds can creates nausea in some people."
"Aren't I … lucky-" He vomited out of the window again, before moving back. "Gonna … limit … food …" Shouldn't be that hard. Coven Scouts ate one rat every week, so he should be fine.
"Oh, speaking off, I packed something extra special for myself-lion lickers!" Lucci took out the bitter frozen treat…the gooey…mushy…sickening treat. "It's a little old, and past it's expiration date, but I'm sure the slight moldiness and the stale bread will only enhance the flavor of the gooey, slimy, milky, creamy, mucky-"
"BLEEEEEEGGGGGGGHHHHH!" Hunter hurled again.
"Great, now how are we supposed to kiss with this going on?" Boscha asked. "The stench of vomit completely kills any romantic atmosphere."
"... Thank you Hunter." Willow patted the boy. "Thank you so, so much. Your sacrifice will not be in vain." Glad to contribute to the cause.
"How many … more … miles." Please let it be short.
"We've gone twenty." He took a relieved breath. "Out of two thousand and seven hundred."
"..." And the vomit was back. "BLEEEE!!"
=======================================================================
Spice was glad he had chosen to stay on top of the large metal vehicle for the duration of the trip. The smell from the blonde boy was annoying. Weakling, if you couldn't handle a little motion, why travel at all.
"Chirp!" He's not weak, he's just not used to traveling on one of these metal monsters.
"Snip." Well now thanks to him, my master can't enjoy her mate.
"Mew." Well if it ruins my master and the human, then it's fine.
"Hsss." We were so close. Our kids were so close to being free of that menace for months….why did her normally reasonable mother have such a lapse in judgment?
"Bzzz." Probably to protect her little kin. At least our kids can protect themselves. A powerless baby human would be completely defenseless.
"Hss." True, it's not like the rock ladies actually contribute.
"Grrr." They used to do better back in the day, Spice imputed.
"... Hhhss." Then why the hell aren't they decent now?
"Grr." Gems can't grow. The threats have done nothing but escalate. "Grr." They do better clumped up in fusions, but too unstable mentally. Plus most of the time they had my former master supporting them. She was pretty much the only reason why any of them had any will to fight at all.
"Pfft, saps. They should learn to get ova themselves, like I did." The lanky pink gem sitting on top of Spice rolled their eyes.
"Mew." You got over her?
"Sure did. No longer care that she's dead and gone. Completely healthy stuff." Spinel laughed. "In fact, I'd probably feel a whole lot better if I grabbed her gem, and crushed it while I see her face fall into despair, and cackle maniacally as I watch her existence fade away into nothing... But Lucci being here kind of takes care of the fading existence part, so I'm all good."
"..Hssh?" So to be clear….you won't take revenge by killing my master?
"Not as long as he never abandons me and leaves me alone." She chuckled. "...Though I guess I can cut him some slack every once in a while. He saved me from six thousand years of being trapped in a dead garden, that deserves some me time. You guys know what I'm talking about, right? Weren't you all abandoned once?"
"Chirp." Less abandoned and more our previous masters died in various ways.
"Exactly, abandoned." … Spice should seriously consider tossing them away. "And when you're all alone with no one to trust, you makes friends and enemies … like the gems, who hurt Lucci, so we want to shatter them."
"Snip." Precisely. Aim for Pearl. We can give Boscha the shards to deliver to Lucci on his birthday, like how he plans to deliver Kevin's head to my master on hers.
"Bzz." Maybe we all need therapy.
"Chirp." I think we'd drive Dr. Waybright into a rubber room if she could understand us.
"You know…it's times like this that remind me just how small we are in the universe…and how I'm weirdly okay with that." The stretchy gem mused as she gazed up at the clouds.
"Grr." Sure, the rest of the lands were infinite, but who needed them when he had pets and treats?
"Hhss?" Do you even need to eat?
"Grr." No, but lizards are nice to chew on every once in a while.
Sugar responded by moving closer to the crazy pink gem. "I mean, maybe it's because I was created to know my place in a horrible caste system, but I just feel content with what I have now. Freedom, fun, and a new bestest best friend that doesn't abandon me for six thousand years."
She was really focused on the abandonment. "So now I'm gonna make sure he's happy, then we can play with each other … as long as we want." She smiled. "Can't you guys imagine it, playing games with no rules or limits. Sounds super fun right?"
"Bzzz." That sounds exactly like what the Collector is doing.
"I don't know who this collector guy you're talking about is, but he seems like a great person to hang out with."
"... Hsss." Suuureeee.
=======================================================================
Leggy smiled as she swam around in the white sea. "Super fluffy … why doesn't anyone else swim?"
"Around a potential enemy!? NEVER!" Eyeball shouted. "You're cuddling with the enemy soldier!"
"Enemy, but they're so fluffy." Navy joined her in swimming in the fluffiness. "Plus we were ordered to keep a close eye on these things, and you can't get a closer eye than right on top of them." It was nice when the others shared her brand of logic.
"Plus, orders from Captain." Doc said. "We have to keep an eye on them. So we will watch these two until they try to leave, then stop them from doing so."
"Krkrkrkrkr." And they had the cutest rumble too. It totally deserved the strange substance they were supposed to throw at them. The 'chaaps'. "Kaaaaa." They placed it into the eye area, as a strange substance melted the ground.
"How fun." Leggy chuckled. It's been pretty fun the past few months. They were praised and complemented constantly, and they didn't fail their assignment! What more could they ask out of life?
"This is super nice and fluffy. You don't know what you're missing, Eyeball." Navy laughed as she rubbed the other, yet same creature.
"Krrrrrkkkk." It ruffled back.
Army was just off in a corner, looking off. "Does anyone else find it strange?"
"How so?" Doc said as she popped off from one of the creature's heads.
"The cluster was supposed to emerge by now…but it hasn't." Eyeball said, staring off into another corner. "The captain said he had taken care of the problem that was preventing it from being deployed….but it still hasn't activated in all this time."
"Exactly. And we've been told to report in if it still hasn't emerged whenever we give our reports." Army continued. "Shouldn't we check on it? Isn't anyone curious why so many things are different on earth compared to the rest of the universe?"
"Earth's just a weird place." Naval shrugged. "It's full of trees and dirt and grass, so much weird stuff. Who knows how much the organic bits change how the world works?" She had a point.
"And not to mention we still haven't found Jasper, even after all this searching." Eyeball complained … and honestly, that was another fair point. "She wouldn't be quite somewhere, she's a quartz."
"Exactly!" Army pointed out. "And again, isn't it weird that we're taking orders from an organic? When that has NEVER happened before in the history of Homeworld?"
"This is an organic planet. We never get sent to many of those." Doc shrugged. "Besides, we still have time. It's not like Jasper is in danger from a bunch of weak organics." Fair points all around.
"True….I just don't like being so unproductive for so long." Army grunted. "We sitting pebbles out here. Who knows what's trying to conspire against us out there?"
"Then we'll punch it just like always." Navy answered. "And if not, slowly earn its trust until we're in a position to obliterate everything they love and care about with glee while watching them suffer in misery."
"You are so needlessly cruel….I'm glad you haven't lost your embers, soldier." Eyeball gave them a thumbs up. Leggy smiled, going back to swimming in the fur. Looks like everything was going to turn out fine for everyone in the end.
=======================================================================
Luz watched everyone. From Hunter, who was grateful from the sweet release of being conscious, to Boscha, who squeezed Lucci without mercy, to Gus, who rested upside down with his palisman, to Willow, who lightly snored, to Sasha, who rested on a mat, to Amity, who laid on the opposite couch.
Apparently Sasha was on 'no hankie pankie' duty from Mom. Which was so unfair, considering one, Lucci and Boscha were getting up into each other's business like there was no tomorrow, and two, Amity and her hadn't even gone that far yet. The trip to hell made them both scared to advance beyond simple lip contact and cuddling anyways.
The palisman were all curled up in an adorable cuddle ball as far away from Luz as possible, Spice lounged around as usual, and Spinel … was projecting quite the … violent little dream over there from her gem …Luz would never trust the eyes off a bunny rabbit ever again….so many quills and blood all over the place.
Anyway, since she couldn't sleep, all that was left was staring at the stars and contemplating life. Like how she was on a road trip with her friends, riding across the country, collecting magical artifacts … the excitement felt amazing.
But … mom was raising Dana … alone …. It already hurt her when dad left, Luz couldn't leave herself, that would just be stupid. The woman was suffering, and the last time Luz left her alone, she dated GREG! That alone was a red flag that she needed all the help she could get. Connie's pity would only last so long, and Sasha's friend could only be so confident when the crystal gems were there, messing up the town.
Luz needed to be by her mother's side. Sure she had the financial support now, but what about emotional and mental support? She needed someone to keep her steady, to help her realize if the next person she decided to date was an utter scumbag that would screw her into raising another illegitimate kid.Not to mention the drunken despair of losing family again. Luz had seen it a hundred times. When she was a kid and dad died, and when Eda and Lucci thought the other was gone and went on CRAZY rampages of vengeance and destruction that never ended well.
Luz's life…her fun…chaotic life of adventure, magic, friendship….and romance….it couldn't continue….she needed to end it before she got sucked back in again…before she made another dumb mistake and decided to stay in the boiling isles…where everyone else she loved lived.
This was it…Luz felt it in her gut….this was the beginning of the end. Once she got her friends home….this would be it. This was their last adventure….so she was going to make every second count. After all … everything deserved a grand finale in the end, right?