"Shut up—!!"
Himeko erupted quite abruptly, her movement so fast it even brought up a gust of wind in this small rental room!
At this moment, she was no longer the restrained and calm commander, but a lioness thoroughly enraged by the pain of her wound.
She took a step forward, her left hand gripping Ryusuke Murata's collar tightly like iron pliers. The huge force pulled his whole body forward from the chair, and the personal terminal fell to the ground with a "clatter."
Himeko's face, almost cracked with anger, was nearly pressed against Ryusuke Murata's face. Her amber pupils, usually gentle or resolute, were now burning with violent flames.
Her voice was distorted and hoarse due to extreme anger.
"Family?! You are now... talking to me about family?!!"
Her anger and alienation did not come from her father's distance. She was not the kind of delicate child dependent on parental care, never had been since childhood.
She learned to be independent very early, learned to take care of herself, and even learned to take care of her mother who often kept silent missing her father.
She understood the importance of her father's work. It was the aerospace cause concerning the future of mankind, a great dream.
When she was little, she even enviously thought that being able to devote a lifetime to the career one loved like her father, shiningly chasing the dream of stars and sea... was really cool.
Looking back, she and Yun Mengxi... were so alike.
They both once looked at a back chasing dreams like that, thinking that was the best appearance in the world...
This thought flashed by, bringing a sharp irony.
But this man was different from Yun Feng!
Yun Feng would give up his dream for his sister. Even if painful, even if regretful, he chose responsibility, chose to protect the more important "light" in his heart.
And this man in front of her...
He would never put down his pursuit.
...Not even once... never...
The floodgate of memories was rudely crashed open.
Not those long-lasting absences she had long been accustomed to when young, not those perfunctory and beautiful "Dad is busy, Himeko be good" pleasantries, but more concrete, colder images—
Just like now, he casually prepared to call up core technologies and precious inventory facing the terminal.
That casual attitude of "sure," "not a big problem."
As if those things costing countless people's blood and sweat, potentially changing the landscape of certain fields, were just insignificant "gadgets" that could be given away casually.
This man... just for such 'small matters' he himself considered insignificant... gave up mom's last chance of survival—!!!
The last tight string snapped completely.
Accumulated for over a decade, forcibly frozen in the deepest part of Himeko's heart by reason, mixed with the residual warmth of childhood admiration, the fatigue of supporting alone in youth, and the severe pain of the last fantasy about "father" finally being crushed...
All of this, like a volcano suppressed for too long, finally erupted at this moment with heat and screech destroying everything!
"Do you know how long Mom waited for you?!
"From childhood to adulthood, I listened to others calling Mom a mistress, calling me a wild child... I was pushed into ditches, schoolbag thrown into trash cans... I never blamed you!!
"Because I knew you were doing very important things! You were chasing your stars! Your rockets!!" Her voice grew higher and sharper, hand gripping the collar trembling violently due to force, knuckles turning pale.
"Mom never blamed you either! She always smiled and told me, 'Dad is doing amazing things,' 'Himeko should be strong like Dad'... She defended you bastard until death!!
"She defended you bastard until death... even when she was lying on the operating table, life hanging by a thread, you fucking refused to come back for a look, refused to come back to sign for her—!!!"
Tears rushed out of her eyes without warning, not warm, but scalding, salty and astringent with the smell of blood.
The roar turned into a broken accusation mixed with violent choking:
"Twelve years old... I was twelve!
"I called you! But I only said 'Mom is sick, needs surgery, Dad can you come back?'
"...And then?! Just because someone next to you said 'seems a small problem occurred'... you hung up! You just hung up like that!!
"You even had the leisure to say to me 'Dad is busy, Himeko be good'!!!"
She seemed to return to that cold, pale hospital corridor full of disinfectant smell.
Small body sliding down against the wall, tightly clutching Mom's old phone, dialing that number that would never connect again and again.
She heard Mom's attending physician arguing fiercely with his director nearby. She even remembered that doctor saying now, "My conscience won't let me watch such a salvageable life killed by so-called rules!"
But all this couldn't cover the busy tone in the phone. Every beep was like an ice pick, ruthlessly knocking holes in her heart.
Ask her to call Dad's colleagues?
She didn't even know a name!
Mom never mentioned those to her, afraid of distracting her, and afraid... of causing trouble for Dad.
"I waited for an hour... a whole hour... do you know what was the last sentence I said to Mom?
"I told her 'Don't be afraid, Dad will definitely come'...
"I believed in you so much!! Even if everyone said you didn't care about us, I believed in you!!!"
She shouted until she couldn't breathe, vision completely blurred, only able to see this familiar yet strange face in front, now written with some blankness she couldn't understand.
Eventually, the flames of anger were drowned by surging sorrow, leaving only boundless coldness and despair.
"Finally... finally the doctor uncle couldn't stand it... he took the risk... entered the operating room without signature... but it was too late... everything was too late... Mom couldn't even say a last word to me... I didn't even see her last face!!"
She finally released the hand gripping the collar tightly, as if exhausting all her strength, staggered back a step, whole person like spine removed, leaving only uncontrollable, heart-rending trembling and crying.
That crying was no longer sharp, but turned into a wail torn out from the depths of the soul belonging to that lonely twelve-year-old girl.
"Clearly... clearly..."
Himeko couldn't control her choking anymore, but she still faced this man, her biological father, and said the development she had hoped for countless times in dreams.
"Clearly at that time you only needed to listen to me finish, then say to the doctor 'I'm coming right away'... Mom could have been saved..."