What do I want in this world.
I thought it was an easy question.
But it's not.
You would think the thing you like to do most is your calling. Some would say it's your path. It's not.
A choice doesn't come from your mind telling you, "I want to become a pilot." It comes from the surroundings you live in.
I live in a place where life is as fleeting as a page turning.
Nothing moves without a reason, but the will to act is even more complex than anything I've ever encountered.
While others think about what they want in life, I am on the other side thinking, "Why bother?"
There is no use for us humans to think about anything if the world has already decided for us. The only thing we made is a mess of ourselves. In other words, you could say we have lost a purpose to live on.
Except for the seven things that push us forward: greed, lust, envy, wrath, pride, sloth, and gluttony.
And me as well, I am no different than you all. I am consumed by three of those seven.
But in the end, I am looking for something that can't be seen nor touched. A balance.
Peace can be said to be an impossibility in this world. Because to have it you need a home with no stress, no worries, no problems. But you also need trouble to keep you active.
And to have those things, you need resources. Which in my opinion always leads to one problematic desire.
Money.
Money always, always leads back to the seven sins no matter what.
I wonder how in the stories Jesus did it. But I will never know, since he's not here and if he was I'm sure he will say, "just have faith".