Mingzhe had been given the opportunity to speak at the end of his trial. It wasn't always allowed, and he hadn't been planning to do it at first. Counsel Margrave and the rest of the High Court seemed more than convinced by what he'd told them already, so he thought he could save himself the humiliation of confessing in public…
To Chenzhou and Eirian.
But as he'd sat alone in his cell for days, with nothing but time to think and no one to talk him out of it, he'd started to worry that it still wasn't enough. That Lady Yang would find a way to escape punishment.
Minghze didn't want to die, but he had some small spark of hope that thought maybe he could survive. Decades in prison, untitled and abandoned, but there was hope one day he could be reunited with his family and Chenzhou and Eirian.
He could live with that, as much as it would hurt.
He could…
But if he survived, did that mean the Yangs could? Chenzhou was already going to be wary of ordering the execution of an entire family.
Rock's sake, he was going to be wary of ordering Mingzhe's execution because he hated having to order it for anyone.
Would the High Court even accept it if Chenzhou decided not to order executions?
The Court wouldn't.
And Yunli might not be able to talk her new husband into agreeing either. Eric was still in the first days of his rule, a precarious time, and he'd just chosen a wife that high society in the capital couldn't have been totally happy about.
And if Mingzhe survived, there was a chance Lady Yang could.
Was it worth the risk?
Lady Yang might be able to put on a good act about having a change of heart or regretting everything she'd done, but it would all be a lie. People who believed things as deeply as she did never actually changed their minds.
True believers.
Zealots.
She couldn't survive. None of them could.
In the dark, damp cell, Mingzhe decided that meant he had to die to ensure she did.
So he'd accepted Counsel Margrave's offer to speak.
When he stepped into the council room, it was silent. Counsel Margrave's assistant had brought him a change of clothes and a bucket of clean water, so he didn't look as bad as he could have. He was thinner, not just from the darkness and minimal food, but from the final use of his magic. He'd left it all in that room, and he could feel its absence.
He'd wondered if this was how Eirian felt and then realized it was probably hundreds of times worse for her.
Chenzhou and Eirian were still when he entered, flanked by Li and one of his most senior guards.
Most of the court was in attendance. The Camelia's unique position and makeup meant far more people had been allowed to witness the trial than normal. Yuze was there, along with Kai Low, whose presence was oddly reassuring. He looked as unimpressed by the proceedings as he was by everything that happened in the estate.
Lord Yin was there, and the old man looked even more like Mingzhe somehow. Mingzhe had never considered that anyone would take what had come out worse than Mingzhe himself or Chenzhou, but Lord Yin looked like he'd aged decades in days.
He'd been close friends with Lady Yang for longer than Mingzhe had been alive.
….Had he known?
Looking at him, Mingzhe doubted it, but he'd also not stopped to think beyond making sure the Yangs were stopped.
The only person who looked nearly as bad was Lord Wen, but that was because the man was counting down the days to his own arrest.
To his surprise, Lady Yang was not present.
He'd succeeded in convincing the High Court that she was enough of a threat that they'd arrested her immediately and refused to allow her, or anyone in her family, to be present.
Lord Yin kept glancing at her empty seat.
The guards stayed next to him as he walked to the center of the room, taking his place next to Counsel Margrave, and they didn't step away until she did. They'd been kind enough to put the smallest chains they had on Mingzhe, and they were hidden by his robes.
Having every eye in the room on him was uncomfortable. He could feel the hatred from some of them like a physical blow.
Chenzhou and Eirian though….
They didn't look angry. They looked disappointed. Sad.
Unconvinced. Which wasn't good, because they had to believe enough not to fight his death. Enough to carry them through this dark period to a life that would be mostly happy.
Mingzhe would be a memory for most of it, but not enough that it dragged them down twenty years from now.
Chenzhou opened his mouth to speak, but stopped before any sound came out. He would take all of this worse than Eirian, Mingzhe knew. Eirian had seen betrayals of this nature in the capital, where there were times when they seemed common, but Chenzhou had not.
He turned to Lord Colfax, seated beside Eirian.
Henri nodded, turned to Mingzhe. "You may make your statement, Lord Zhao." And then he turned a harsh look at the rest of the court. "You will not be interrupted."
Counsel Margrave followed it up with her own harsh look at the court members. The High Court took the ceremonial aspect of their trials very seriously. They even slapped fines on those present who disrespected them.
Mingzhe swallowed, mouth suddenly dry. "Thank you." It took a couple more swallows for his voice to sound anything near normal. He looked at the court, but his words were for Chenzhou and Eirian. "There is nothing I can say that will answer every question you have. That will assuage the hurt I have caused. I can only plead with you to understand that I was young and I truly thought that it was helping the Camelia. Lady Yang is uniquely convincing when it comes to what she thinks is best for the estate. Nevertheless, I take full responsibility for my actions and for every hurt they have caused. In another life…in another life, I would have made different choices. I would have had more faith in the abilities of my fellow nobles, in my fellow soldiers. I would have seen more hope in the world than hopelessness. The cost of my actions is high; the cost of your inaction could be even higher, so I beg the court to show no leniency."
A few of them looked surprised at that.
"Life must move forward with no doubts as to the hearts of those who remain, so I offer my apology along with a request. Carve out this poison we have become with a hot blade and only look forward after."
~ tbc