(Ost Rec: Hunter x Hunter OST - Theme of Kage & RASETSU)[1]
He had moved.
The girl boarding the train could no longer recall how she had even gotten this far. She had rushed to Yokohama, to that chaotic little apartment, hoping to see Haru before anyone else.
But what she heard from the landlady stunned her. The "Kazami" who once lived on the second floor had already moved out some time ago.
Her slender body swayed with the motion of the carriage. Sitting by the door, her pale blue hair brushing against her shoulders, Sakiko's gaze grew dim and uncertain. Still wearing the Haneoka school uniform, she clenched the straps of her bag so tightly her knuckles turned white.
"…He moved."
Her voice, small and heavy, disappeared into the cracks of the air. Trembling, she gripped her phone.
If Haru had simply moved, that alone wasn't the issue. What unsettled Sakiko was the fact that he hadn't told her. If she hadn't gone there today, she wouldn't have known at all.
Why hadn't he told her?
Outside, the scenery blurred past, carrying her drifting thoughts. Leaning against the window, she couldn't find words for the feelings swelling inside. Again and again her mind replayed the image of being with him, marrying him, his voice lingering in her ears.
[Ikebukuro Station, now arriving...]
Even if she stopped moving, time would not.
The announcement pulled her wandering thoughts back. Sakiko let out a deep breath, fists clenched.
In just a few breaths, the light in her eyes returned, glowing with unshakable resolve.
"How could I possibly stop here?"
Her future was to be his lover, to marry, to bear children, to grow old together, and finally to walk hand in hand across that river of life and death. Any setback now was nothing but a trifle. Nothing could break her when she was like this.
Her love burned fiercely.
"…"
Sakiko gripped her bag and strode out of the station, calm yet unwavering in her conviction.
The dreams that others would call nightmarish, the countless loops that could crush anyone's will, she had endured them. She had grown, battered by storm and rain.
She even felt gratitude toward that so-called "god," for letting her learn so much through it.
The old Sakiko, who ignored others' feelings and cared only about self-satisfaction under the guise of "doing what was best for him," was gone. The Sakiko of now could face any problem directly. She could truly consider Haru's feelings and thoughts.
"Haru must have had some reason for not telling me he moved."
"I'll ask him face-to-face. No matter what, I'll confess to him!"
Her words spilled out as she quickened her pace, the crisp sound of her black leather shoes echoing against the pavement.
A faint smile lifted her lips, born of the anticipation of seeing him again.
She had already wasted time running all the way to Yokohama. Now the sky grew darker, and she hurried faster, cutting through familiar streets, past the park she knew near Ikebukuro.
At last, she stopped before a house.
"…"
Sakiko stared blankly at the detached home before her. According to the landlady, this was the area he had moved to. But all she saw here were standalone houses and large residences, no small rental apartments at all.
Had Haru really moved here?
Doubt stirred within her. Sakiko decided to ask the nearby residents for answers.
She had only just turned her head when she noticed a few housewives chatting by the roadside. Before Sakiko could approach them to ask her questions, her gaze was abruptly stolen by a small, emerald-colored figure, and after that she could no longer look away.
A petite girl in casual home clothes stood blankly before the women. In her left hand she held a white plastic bag with vegetables and fruit, while one of the housewives kept pressing more items into her arms.
"…Mutsumi?"
Sakiko froze, her expression stiff. She had never imagined she would run into her here.
Not far away, the doll-like girl cradled the gifts from the women in her arms. She bowed her head like any ordinary girl, thanking them sincerely. Her eyes, once completely devoid of emotion, now shimmered with a faint light.
That girl was Mutsumimi, but at the same time, she was not the Mutsumi Sakiko remembered.
In Sakiko's memory, Mutsumi had always been like a porcelain doll, every gesture filled with the elegance of the Wakaba family's young lady. No matter the setting, she had always borne that same expression, as though she had been born incapable of showing even the slightest flicker of emotion.
On stage or in private, she had always been the same.
And now?
Now, this Mutsumi stood just a few meters away, yet the closer Sakiko looked, the farther away she seemed. Even if she tried to take a step forward, the distance between them would not close.
Time itself seemed to freeze, the moment stretching unbearably long.
"…"
Perhaps it was because Sakiko stood out so starkly in the middle of the road, but the doll-like girl seemed to notice something. She tilted her head slightly, casting her gaze this way.
That small, unthinking gesture caused their eyes to meet in the air.
"Saki?"
Mutsumi's lips parted in surprise. Clearly, she had not expected to see Sakiko here.
"Oh my, is that a friend of yours, Mutsumi?"
One of the housewives beside her asked curiously, glancing at Sakiko. The sudden attention left the proud young lady momentarily speechless, but she quickly gathered herself and walked toward Mutsumi.
Her mind went blank, yet instinct compelled her to speak.
Standing before her now, Mutsumi wore nothing but simple, loose-fitting home clothes. She brushed aside strands of shining green hair from her cheek, her face sculpted with delicate perfection, carrying an expression unlike any she had shown before.
Was this truly Mutsumi?
"Mutsumi, why are you here?"
Sakiko dared not think too far, but the situation pushed her thoughts to the edge regardless.
The doll-like girl, usually expressionless, stood quietly, holding the bundle of gifts tightly to her chest. At last, she spoke in her soft, measured voice.
"I moved here recently."
"M… moved?"
Sakiko's eyes widened, lost for words.
The housewife beside Mutsumi smiled and explained, "Oh, young lady, you didn't know? Mutsumi just moved here recently, because she's living together with her fiancé. So young, and already learning the life of a housewife."
"That's right, that's right. To see such youthful devotion these days is rare. Just watching her makes me feel young again."
Because Mutsumi was so small and delicate, yet so earnest in her efforts, everyone was eager to help her. The neighbors gladly answered her questions and even gave her special products from other places as gifts.
But none of them noticed the way Sakiko's expression grew darker and darker. Her face, once composed, had turned stiff and pale, stripped of its usual smile. Mutsumi, however, noticed it all.
It seemed there was no longer any hiding it.
The cucumber girl wanted to reach out and pull Sakiko aside, but both her hands were full with the gifts and groceries she had bought.
Mutsumi slowly closed her star-like golden eyes, and in her calm, measured tone, said,
"Saki, can you come with me for a moment?"
"…"
Sakiko had no idea how to respond. Before she could say anything, Mutsumi had already excused herself from the housewives and began walking away, as though certain that Sakiko would follow.
The silent girl bit her lip and lingered for a few moments, but in the end, she followed.
Mutsumi walked ahead, her face as still as ever. She cradled the bundle large enough to hide her face and led Sakiko to a residence with a nameplate that read "Kazami."
Carefully, she set the items down, then pulled a key from her pocket and unlocked the gate with practiced ease.
The sight burned itself into Sakiko's vision. She could not tear her gaze from the nameplate, from the word Kazami. Numbly, she watched as Mutsumi picked up the items again and stepped inside.
"Saki, come in and sit."
Mutsumi placed the things down at the entryway, then pulled a brand-new pair of slippers from the cabinet and set them in front of Sakiko. But Sakiko, her mind in chaos, did not move. She only stared at Mutsumi's face with a tangled, indescribable expression.
Countless emotions wove together into a suffocating web within her heart. Endless questions and disbelief pressed down on her like a mountain of stone, so heavy she longed to shatter it all at once.
Why had Mutsumi moved here?
Why did she have the key to Haru's home?
Why had others said she was living with her fiancé?
"Mutsumi, I need you to explain this to me."
"What exactly is going on?"
The thousands of words weighing down her chest finally spilled out as a frail question, lacking the strength and sharpness she once wielded as a member of Oblivionis. Her voice trembled with the weariness of a heartbroken girl.
She should not have asked, for she already knew.
Sakiko was clever, perceptive. She recalled every inconsistency around Mutsumi, the engagement ring always on her finger, and the things she had just witnessed with her own eyes.
The fragments she had gathered pieced themselves together, forming a complete picture, a parallel line closest to the truth.
"…"
Mutsumi looked at her pale, exhausted face in silence. At last she reached out, gently taking Sakiko's wrist, and led her toward the living room. Powerless, Sakiko could not resist.
In moments she was pressed softly onto the sofa, not even realizing how much Mutsumi's demeanor had changed.
Mutsumi placed a cup of tea before her, the steam rising gently into the air. But to Sakiko, shivering in the cold, there was no warmth in it. She only stared blankly at the cup, lost and trembling.
"…Mutsumi, you have to tell me honestly."
"Is the one you're engaged to Haru?"
The moment those words left her lips, it felt as if all strength drained out of her. Mutsumi lowered her head in silence.
"…Yes."
That single word, spoken with quiet certainty, came from the doll-like girl's mouth. Haru's fiancée.
Sakiko collapsed back into the sofa as though her body could no longer support her. Her messy bangs clung to her damp forehead. Her lifeless eyes stared only at her trembling fingertips.
She didn't even think to question whythe prestigious Wakaba family would agree to such an engagement. After all, even the heiress herself had been "married off" to him in broad daylight. No one understood better than her just how extraordinary Haru was.
And now that glittering ring on Mutsumi's hand, its brilliance stabbed at her like a blade.
So that's how it is.
She had already lost from the very beginning. Before she ever fell into that endless "dream," she had already lost everything. Reality was not the dream she once clung to. In this real world, Mutsumi had long since been engaged to Haru.
Haru hadn't told her about moving. That must have been because Mutsumi forbade him to.
Sakiko hadn't even managed to set foot on the stage of fair competition before learning that Mutsumi had already reached the finish line. The helplessness, the frustration, the bitter unwillingness... it all pressed down on her chest until she could hardly breathe. Her pupils quivered violently.
Why? Why is it like this?
This wasn't the dream. This was reality. And here, there would be no more resets, no more cycles.
Then what about all those memories, all those beautiful dreams she had lived through? What about the future she had believed in? What about the countless "trials" she endured? Were they meaningless? Was God only amusing Himself, watching her collapse into tears and despair?
Cruel. God is far too cruel.
"…."
Seeing her dearest friend's eyes fill with tears, Mutsumi bit her lip slightly. She then sat down beside Sakiko and placed a gentle hand over hers. Her voice was calm, but unyieldingly firm.
"Saki, it's okay."
Those words, meant as comfort, struck Sakiko's ears as nothing but mockery. Like the sneer of a victor toward the one who had lost.
Her hands clenched into fists so tightly that her knuckles ached. But after a moment, she released them, powerless.
What good would it do to be angry now?
"And only now you try to comfort me?"
Sakiko slowly lifted her head. Her vacant gaze fixed on the "other half" before her from someone she envied, someone she hated, someone she could never separate herself from.
Just when did Mutsumi and Haru become like this? And why hadn't she seen it at all until now?
Her self-mocking words left Mutsumi frozen for a moment, then the green-haired girl shook her head hard.
"I'm not mocking you, Sakiko."
"Haru doesn't belong to me alone. If it's you, then I..."
Before Mutsumi could finish, she was cut off.
"Are you kidding me?"
Sakiko's voice trembled, but her fury was unmistakable. Her eyes blazed at the girl beside her.
Her "other half," Mutsumi, knew full well who she loved. Yet she had gone behind her back and become engaged to Haru. And now, in front of her face, she dared to say such pitiful, patronizing words... as if offering her charity.
Sakiko had never been so furious.
She wanted to stand proudly at Haru's side, as his rightful partner, his wife. Not sneak around in the shadows, hiding like some shameful mistress.
And yet Mutsumi, already Haru's fiancée his future wifewas actually suggesting such a thing, as though she could "make room" for her.
"How can you treat Haru like that? Did you even consider his feelings?"
Once upon a time, Sakiko herself had been guilty of that very same sin. Always thinking only of "what's best for him." Always intoxicated by her own self-righteousness.
But she wasn't that girl anymore.
And now, to see Mutsumi walking the same path she once despised, it ignited a fury in her chest that she could not hold back.
"…."
For a moment, even Mutsumi was stunned by Sakiko's outburst. She froze, speechless, before finally answering in a quiet voice.
"…That's not what I meant. The truth is, Haru is still dating others besides me. All of us… we've agreed to stay with him, to marry him together. Haru has even convinced my mother."
"The Wakaba family has already given their approval. No one will stop us now."
"…."
Sakiko's lips parted, but no words came out. She felt as though her ears were deceiving her.
What kind of absurdity was this?
Everyone openly dating Haru? All of them, including Mutsumi herself, agreeing to such an arrangement? And to go so far as to announce it openly to the Wakaba family?
Impossible. It had to be impossible.
And yet…
There was undeniable proof. The engagement ring. Mutsumi's engagement was public knowledge across Tsukinomori and now, she was living with Haru, under the same roof.
That could only mean one thing. The Wakaba family really had given their consent.
"…I… I have to see Haru."
Sakiko staggered to her feet, her mind blank. All she could think was to run, to find him, to hear it from his own mouth.
But before she could leave, Mutsumi caught her wrist.
It was only then that Sakiko realized Haru wasn't home. She turned toward Mutsumi, her eyes filled with desperation.
"Mutsumi. You haveto tell me."
"Where is Haru?!"
[1] https://youtu.be/K3d_k_21QPg?si=JHjfHisFc98pPS0A