Behind me were three girls. The one who had caught my eye was at the front, with a somewhat serious tone and look. To her left and right were two more girls, apparently a little scared.
They were looking at me, although they broke eye contact as soon as I looked back at them.
"… Me?"
"Yes, to you!"
As the girl spoke, the people who hadn't yet left fell silent, staring at the group of four now causing a ruckus. I could feel everyone getting closer, along with murmurs too faint to understand from a distance.
" I'm just going to ask you one thing…"
"…?" I didn't quite understand what it had to do with her. Her name doesn't come to mind right now, but I think it was something like Otsuki… No, her last name was Otsuki.
I couldn't describe her with the word "tomboy," but she wasn't exactly feminine either. She was of average height, about 1.66 meters if I had to guess.
Her hair was a slightly dark brown, reaching her shoulders, except for two strands in front that reached her chest. Her bangs almost covered her right eye, and you could see how they were slightly moved to prevent that. She had a figure that was neither too thin nor too heavy, and the only flesh she showed were her arms, since she wore a long brown school uniform skirt, a bit longer than what 99% of girls usually wear in autumn.
The sleeves of her gray uniform jacket were rolled up above her elbows, leaving only her white button-down shirt visible down to her wrists. Furthermore, only one button was fastened on her jacket, just below her breasts. It wasn't as if her bust would be a problem when buttoning the shirt, but it wasn't like she was a flat ironing board.
Her voice was neither deep nor shrill; Come on, she wasn't a tomboy or a three-year-old.
Her eyes were the same color as her hair, and along with her body, her way of dressing, and her voice, that's what gave her a tomboyish air. It contrasted sharply with her hair, the rest of her face, and her height, which seemed a bit more feminine.
"…" "…" Both of the girls behind her were quiet. They were more plain than Otsuki. I don't think they were even from this class. Did they come in after leaving their own? Did it take me that long to get up?
"Well, I guess you've heard anyway…"
"… About what?"
Otsuki looked both surprised and disappointed by my answer.
"…Some rumors. Rumors that have been circulating around the school since Monday."
I just kept quiet and let her talk. I still didn't understand anything.
She sighed, treating me like a lost cause. "…I find it shocking that you haven't heard…" I thought it would be some gossip about &$%"! and why I wasn't going to class, but from there, it all went downhill.
"…you should be ashamed of yourself." She finished the sentence with an insult.
"...E-eh?" It got me by complete surprise the sudden comment, but for the sake of the conversation, I decided to ignore it.
"Anyway… Everyone's talking about what happened on Saturday. Before I say anything else, I'm so sorry for your loss." The moment he started talking, the whole class leaned closer to pay attention; it was like a soap opera.
I was getting nervous. Besides, they've already mentioned something about this last Saturday. I assumed the whole class would know, but the whole school?
"Likewise, I'm still unsure what to believe…" Throughout her explanation, she sounded slightly angry, I don't know what about. I can't think of anything. She was speaking in a very ambiguous way.
"…I figured you'd heard. And, thank you for the condolences," I replied.
" No, I don't think you're understanding me…" She emphasized. What could I possibly not understand about something so clear and so recent?
"About what? I really don't want to talk about it anymore." She tried to keep her voice low. Loud enough for me to hear, but low enough to avoid attracting attention. She tried to end the conversation.
Everyone in the class was standing in front of me, paying attention. Their eyes were expectant, searching for something.
"Wha-… No, you really don't know what I'm talking about…" After making sure she was right, Otsuki asked one of the girls behind her a strange request, not because it was unique, but because of the given situation.
"Tsukiyomi, can you play the video?" He asked the girl on his right.
It didn't take long for her to pull out her phone and unlock it. After searching for it for a bit, she played something for me.
"I still can't believe what they say happened, just look at it for me."
He put a video on his phone. He came over to me just to show it to me.
At the beginning of this, there were the two girls from now, the ones who were next to him, walking down the street.
[Hi, Atsumi.] The other girl who had come with Otsuki was waving at the camera, which was in selfie mode. [Hi,] Tsukiyomi was behind her.
[Look, we were going to your house to get you out of there and have you sleep over. Natsuki's mom lets us.] The other girl, temporarily named Blonde, summarized their plans. I don't know who this Natsuki girl is. They were walking while recording, and the camera wobbled in response. She continued talking:
[We'll convince your mom, don't worry.] She spoke in a somewhat calm and kind tone, the opposite of Tsukiyomi's.
[And if we can't?]
[We'll sleep over at her house. It would still be difficult for her mom not to let her.] They were walking down a street in a neighborhood, I assumed to Otsuki's house. Without a care in the world, of course. Actually, Tsukiyomi might have been a little nervous.
[You can't drag us out by force! Like you do other times.]
[When we get to your house, tell us if you can.]
[Well, we're there in-] Her sentence was briefly interrupted, but not by choice.
[AAAAAHHH!!] A sudden scream could be heard in the distance. It sounded agonized, desperate. Broken.
[HIII!] Tsukiyomi shrieked in fright and grabbed the blonde's arm.
[...A scream?]
[I-it didn't come from very far...]
The tone and expression of both of them showed clear surprise and concern, especially Tsukiyomi's, who was terrified.
[I think we should go. Something bad must have happened.]
[I don't know... It gives me a bad feeling... I don't want to get into trouble.] The phone dropped to the ground to record. They weren't paying attention to what it was recording.
[What if we ignore it and it turns out to be something serious?]
[Yeah… but…]
[We can take a look, and if it's something bad, we can record it on our phones as evidence and call the police.]
[D-do you really want to do something like that?…]
[Nothing good can come from a scream like that… I promise we'll leave as soon as anything strange happens.]
[…Without a second thought.]
[Yes. Don't worry. I'd feel bad if the news later said something happened here.] The blonde was the one who insisted on going to see where the scream was coming from. She continued speaking, now to the camera.
[Atsumi, if we don't make it to your house, find our bodies for our own good, okay?]
[S-save those jokes for another time!!] The blonde was in the same cheerful and silly tone as before, while Tsukiyomi was consumed by fear.
[I'll continue the video later; for now, I'll stop.] Just as she said, the video ended.
The only interesting thing I could glean from the video was the scream. I don't know if I recognize it, and I definitely haven't heard any screams in my neighborhood lately…
"There's more."
"...Y-yes." I was still confused. Maybe they were just surprised that I didn't know anything about the rumor and hadn't mentioned it to anyone.
The rest of the class watched our interaction, not wanting to see the video at all.
I was tense. More than because of what might be in the video, it was because of the whole class's attention on the situation. Can't you go home?
Tsukiyomi played the next video. Several voices could be heard in the distance, but one stood out.
[I…] At first, I couldn't hear her well.
The girls were about to peek out from around a corner. In the video, the front camera was on, recording them as they walked silently toward a street, close to the wall.
[W-we're here, we still don't know what's going on.]
[Yes, Tsukiyomi is going to do the honors of peeking.]
[W-why me!?] They both tried to speak in low voices so they wouldn't be heard. Their voices were still indistinct in the distance.
[If there's blood, I'm going to faint.]
[Yy-you think I won't?!]
[But you're used to watching so many horror movies.]
[But n-it's not… Ugh, fine, I'll do it.]
The phone was shaking slightly as it got closer and closer to turning the corner.
[I…] That was all it took for me to understand everything. I went from being nervous and intrigued to agitated and pressured.
The phone peeked around the corner.
[What is…] Tsukiyomi's voice trailed off.
[…Huh?] She zoomed in with the camera to get a better look at the scene.
An ambulance was stopped in the middle of the street, in front of a house. Outside, two police officers stood beside an ambulance, their patrol car nearby. A boy sat on the ground, his hands covering his head, staring at the ground, cowering.
He held a knife, and his clothes were soaked with blood.
[…] It was clear Tsukiyomi was in shock, not only because of the scene but also because of the loud voice.
[I KILLED HER!] Just hearing such a broken, desperate scream made me recoil. That could have woken up more than one person.
Tsukiyomi stopped filming the boy, focusing instead on the ground.
Both police officers were trying to help the boy, holding him and doing everything they could to calm him down, but their efforts were failing in the face of the young man's drastic attitude.
Understandably, people in nearby houses came out to see what was happening.
His jacket, his pants, and his hands were lightly stained with blood. He had a handprint on his right cheek, also drawn with blood, and his hair was stained with it as well.
He kept exclaiming the same phrase, "I killed her…"
[WITH MY OWN HANDS…]
While his cries continued, the scene unfolded.
Five people came out of the house, carrying a stretcher with a person on it. The stretcher was stained with blood, as were the paramedics.
As soon as they came out, the boy looked up and was stunned by the scene. He tried to say something, but he couldn't. He just stammered.
He was about to get up and throw himself toward the stretcher, but…
[Don't look. Calm down, everything's going to be alright.] Look me in the eyes, she's going to-] One of the police officers in front of the young man tried to speak to him while holding him by the shoulders, attempting to shield the gruesome scene unfolding with his body.
[AMAYA!!!] No…
Both men had to restrain the boy, who was trying to lunge at the person on the stretcher, screaming desperately, but at the same time, displaying a pure, almost animalistic rage.
[NO! DON'T TAKE HER! PLEASE! No…]
Gasps and complaints were all that could be heard from the young man as the paramedics loaded the girl into the ambulance.
[…]
[W-what is-?]
[Don't come any closer, Hina. Let's go. We'll meet another day.]
Tsukiyomi said to the other girl, turning away, forgetting to finish the video. The nervousness and shyness she had before had vanished, leaving only a cold voice. The blonde, or rather Hina, was worried, and perhaps regretful.
Tsukiyomi realized she was still recording, so she ended the video. I couldn't hold it in any longer.
Weight, pressure, tightness, tremors, nausea. A tense aura enveloped me, as everything took on a darker hue, but at the same time, it lost its color.
Tsukiyomi was crying in class. She was crouching down, covering her face. Hina was trying to calm her down, though she was also agitated.
"C-come on… explain this… to everyone… please." Even Otsuki was somewhat conflicted after watching the video again.
People already knew all this. They'd already seen it. They were talking to each other. About me. Blaming me.
For my part, I tried to get away from them step by step, but my legs wouldn't respond.
They were shaking. It was as if I was deliberately hitting the ground. I didn't feel capable of saying anything at that moment either.
"I-I…" The few words that came out of my mouth were too weak to be heard.
Every time, I could hear my name more and more in their mouths.
Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku. Riku.
The voices speaking among themselves gradually pressured me to speak.
The faces of the people around him grew darker and darker.
His eyes were the only thing that still shone.
All marked on me.
They wanted to know the meaning of my words.
The only face I could make out was Otsuki's.
Hate.
Doubt.
Hope.
Every second I remained silent increased the tension in the class.
Everyone was staring at me. I couldn't tell what the other people's screams were saying; I just knew they were directed at me.
Pressure.
It was all dark.
Pressure
I was going to speak.
Pressure.
I wanted to make it all stop.
Solution.
"I don't…"
Request.
"Say something!" Otsuki exclaimed, waiting for a clear answer. Yes or no.
Answer.
" She committed suicide…"
Silence.
Everyone understood that I said something, but not what I said. They were waiting for me to say it again.
"What did he say?" "Did you hear that?" "Say it again!"
"You haven't done anything, have you?" Tsukiyomi tried to convince herself that what she thought was a lie.
But he couldn't speak.
Nothing came out of my mouth.
I couldn't see anything anymore.
Black.
I was lost.
I couldn't do anything.
He wasn't able to do anything.
I wanted to shrink back and cover my ears.
But I couldn't do that either.
Everyone would look down on me even more if I did.
My soul trembled.
I felt nothing, but I understood everything.
I could still hear all those voices.
That weak cry behind the impenetrable wall in front of him.
I was scared. I'd never felt so terrified, so pressured.
Everything was horrible. Everyone was staring at me. I had no one on my side. Everyone was against me.
I felt...
...so lonely.
"What's all the fuss about?!" An angry teacher burst into the classroom. For a moment, I could see everything again.
The whole class turned to look at the teacher, except me.
. ..Now.
There was no one behind me. I could run. I was going to run. I turned around.
I stopped seeing all the people there. It seemed like I was alone.
But when I turned around, something prevented me from leaving.
Someone was blocking my exit.
A white place.