"Mother."
"Soren dear, how have you been?" A high pitched but sweet voice asked over the phone, her voice betraying her over excitement in talking to her son. He hummed. "I'm fine, mother. How are you?" His usual detachedness was there but you could sense an unusual patience behind his voice. It was very rare and you could tell he only used such a tone with his mom.
"I'm fine, Soren dear. Your father and I have been worried about you. He wouldn't let me rest till he knew you were fine. I told him you could take care of yourself but he still insisted," she said amusingly, her singsong voice raising a bit higher than normal. Soren sighed. "Tell Dad to not worry. I'm fine. And he shouldn't let you call me if he's the one worried all the time. He has my number too," he said coolly, his voice barely having any emotion. "You know how he gets my boy. Your father is all about being tough but he's just a sweetheart. Don't be too hard on him," she said warmly, her tone soft.
He nodded even though she couldn't see him and realizing that he murmured, barely audibly. His mother smiled.
"How was the will reading? Wait before that, did you see her? How is she? Does she look alright? Does it look like she's eating well — mother.
"Oh, where does she stay right now — mother!
Soren pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a quiet sigh. "I'm sorry, I was just worried about her," she sounded apologetic and it made Soren ground his teeth. There was no need for her to apologize. He spoke calmly, "she's fine mother. Maybe not in the most convenient way but she's well, I can assure you that. You don't have to worry."
"She... doesn't recognize you, does she?"
The question had Soren clench his hands so tight, he might have broke something if he was holding onto any. He shifted the phone to his other ear and he tried to reign in his emotions. "No," he answered simply and his mother's defeated sigh washed over his being.
"Maybe that's not all bad. At least she doesn't remember those nasty things that happened — mom," he stopped his mother once again from completing her statement.
A murderous glint passed his eyes and he let out a quiet breath. His mother, knowing well she had stirred unpleasant memories, pursed her lips as she tried to find the appropriate words to say next after the silence that had taken over. She didn't know why she couldn't control herself from finding out things that were not any of her business.
"I'll talk to you later mother. I need to sort out some files." Soren was tired and he wanted to just rest. "Hmm. Okay. Please take care of yourself for me. I love you. Bye." And the call went dead. Soren threw the phone God knows where and leaned in his seat, burying his face in his hands and his mind drifted to far away memories, memories he could never forget even if they were erased.
"Don't run. You'll trip," he tried to warn the little girl who was overly joyed and running around the garden without a care for anything in the world. And before long, as if he had manifested it, the little girl came tumbling on the ground with a heavy thud.
"Lili," he shouted in panic and before long he was right by her side. "Are you alright, are you hurt?" He searched her frantically for any injuries as he helped her up. She sat up, wiping the dirt off her clothes and hands. She blew the hair that had gotten in her mouth and let out a chuckle. "That was fun," she said without an ounce of hurt or tears in her eyes. "You look more scared than I am Ren and it was me that fell," she chuckled again as if she couldn't be bothered that she had literally just fallen a few seconds ago.
Soren stared at the girl who was taking his worry so lightly and he angrily got up from the floor, heading to the mansion without looking back. "Ren, Ren, wait, come back. I didn't mean to scare you," the little girl who had realized the gravity of the situation and had noticed his mood switch was quick on her heels to follow him. Her voice drifted over to him with the wind but he refused to stop, never once looking behind him and the longer he went the farther her voice got away from him. He stopped after a while and he turned back only to be met with pitch darkness. The little girl was nowhere to be found and panicked, he searched around desperately for her, but the place was dark and he couldn't even tell his own self apart from the darkness let alone find someone.
"Lili! Lili! Lili! There was no answer, only his voice echoing in the dark. "Lili! He stumbled, as if falling into an endless pit.
And he gasped awake. He searched around him, realizing he was still in his study, sitting in the chair. It was just a dream but he couldn't even remember when exactly he had dozed off. He got up from his seat and made his way to his bedroom. He entered the bathroom and washed his face, washing away the exhaustion and the delirium he felt from the earlier dream. Soren stared himself in the mirror, his eyes mirroring his childhood self as he left her behind. He shut his eyes and opened them again. He straightened, his reflection staring back at him in mockery at the man he had become without her. If only he had looked back that day. If only — but the past was the past and he couldn't do anything about it anymore.
He leaned over the sink and with the most broken voice a man could possibly have whispered so softly it might have been the passing breeze, "Lili."