Disclaimer: I own nothing but my original characters and works; all other characters and worlds belong to their respective owners. I'm just playing with them.
Betad by
The Dispatcher
Chapter 01: Vanguard
You know what's weird?
My priorities.
I mean, I'm missing an entire limb, pretty much my entire team is dead, my city is a smouldering ruin (fuck you, Burnscar) and yet, what am I worried about?
My fucking suit.
Well, it's not like it's a nice three-piece suit I picked up at the tailor. My mechsuit is my pride and joy, and the result of a literal decade of work. It's… everything. It's my image, my life's work, the singular most expensive piece of Tinkertech in the entire world. The reason countless villains and criminals are locked away. It's a bigger piece of Vanguard than I am.
And now, it's gone.
I mean, sure I have more tech than just my mecha but that thing represents more hours and far more money than I even want to think about. More importantly, the core that powered it is equally fucked and I genuinely don't know if I can recreate it. The simple, painful truth is that the core was a masterpiece of both myself and my mentor, but he's is gone now and I can't remake it without him.
This makes this the second time the fucking Slaughterhouse Nine have taken something extremely dear to me and destroyed it.
Well, at least I made them pay for it. I just fear that the price I paid wasn't worth it in the end.
Turning on the tv in my hospital room, I immediately sigh and wonder why I bothered as the news comes on, the breaking story… the destruction of San Francisco.
Yeah, could have seen that coming.
I really fucking hate the Nine. Switching the channels, I settle on some shitty soap opera instead and amuse myself with this episode's dramatic plot. An… affair! Dun, dun, duuuuun!
I mean, the last episode's plot was also an affair. And the one before that, now that I think about it. But this time, he cheated with her aunt! Or was it his aunt? It's someone's aunt.
God, I would commit actual war crimes to get better channels in this place. I'd make Jack Slash look like a saint in comparison for a single actually entertaining tv channel. This right here? My villain origin story.
Wait, she cheated too? And with his best friend?! Holy shit. I wish I had popcorn. Is there anyone on the street that isn't having at least two affairs?
"I didn't take you for a soap opera kind of person," a familiar voice says, distracting me from my show. Most people would probably be excited as I turn to face one of the most famous heroes in the world, dressed in her form-fitting black bodysuit with the image of a tower on her chest.
"Eh," I say, shrugging to Alexandria as I turn the volume down and turn to face her. "So, I don't suppose you're here to tell me how bad it actually is? So far, I've gotten a bunch of very PR-friendly corporate answers that amounted to telling me fuck all."
"Better than it could have been, thanks to you," Alexandria starts.
"Spare me the platitudes. The entire city was on fire, almost an entire branch of the Protectorate wiped out and more civilian deaths than I care to think about," I sigh.
"Correct, but that doesn't change my statement. Your evacuation protocols got approximately eighty-seven percent of the civilians out, along with the Watchdog main office and the entire Wards team. As I said, better than it could have been," Alexandria replies, her tone cool as ever. "It isn't a victory, but it isn't a complete loss either. The fires have been put out, and we've approached Toybox to hire Big Rig to assist with the rebuilding efforts."
That's a nice way to say that thirteen percent didn't get out. San Fran had a population of approximately eight hundred thousand people. So, the death toll is around the one hundred thousand people mark? Lovely.
"And the Nine?" I ask, morbidly curious what happened after I lost consciousness.
"Fled before reinforcements could arrive, but not intact. As you know, Crawler was confirmed eliminated after your beam weapon hit his core. There have been some questions about what exactly that weapon was, given the power it displayed, but the Chief Director herself has silenced any complaints about unregistered weaponry," Alexandria admits, as I roll my eyes. Fucking bean counters and their red tape. "It was one of his, wasn't it?"
"It was. One of the only other pieces I managed to get working. I was hoping to use it against an Endbringer, which was what it was created for but the opportunity never came up. The scanner that located the core was mine," I explain.
"Hero would be proud, Vanguard," Alexandria says. You think a member of the Triumvirate would be better at this, but Legend has always been the best at this kind of stuff. Hero was my mentor, my icon, before Siberian ripped him in two. As it happens, I was also the only person able to understand and manipulate his remaining tinkertech… which included the energy core that powered my entire mecha. "Not many could take on the Nine, with a malfunctioning suit no less, and come out alive, let alone turn what should have been a complete defeat into a near-win."
"And the rest?" I ask, my tone clipped. 'Malfunctioning'. My suit wasn't malfunctioning. It was sabotaged.
"I'm afraid whatever you did to Siberian didn't work. She was confirmed KIA during the fight, but later reappeared no worse for wear," Alexandria admits, causing me to curse under my breath.
"I really hate her," I grunt. What the fuck does it take to kill that bitch? I was sure that had got her-
"Agreed. Jack Slash, Burnscar, Shatterbird and Mannequin also survived and escaped. Mannequin was seen carrying what appeared to be the damaged energy core of your suit," Alexandria continues. "Hatchet Face is confirmed eliminated, as his Brute Rating was evidentially not sufficient to survive a direct blast from the Vanguard suit and your trap worked, capturing and relocating Bonesaw, who was successfully arrested."
"Birdcage?" I ask, getting a head shake.
"No, nor the death penalty, annoyingly. Bonesaw has too many dead man switches inside her body for that and there was a concern about giving her access to some of the Birdcage inmates. She's in a specially designed prison, for now, until we can work out what to do with her," Alexandria explains with a visible frown. I knew I should have deatomised that psychotic little bitch. Surely her apocalyptic surprises wouldn't have survived that.
When I caught her, she was literally stitching an entire family together into an unholy flesh golem. Including the family dog.
And that was the least horrific of her crimes of the night. God, I hope Trackstar is fine. Or as fine as someone who got taken apart but that psychopath can be, at least.
I wasted a perfectly good teleport trap on her when I wanted Jack. But, I suppose it's better this way.
"I imagine they aren't happy about that," I huff, getting what might pass for a smile from Alexandria. "Trackstar?"
"Survived. He's not happy, but he's alive. Bonesaw says you are a 'very bad man'. Her dress didn't survive the teleportation and she feared you wanted to touch her in her no-no places. Her words," Alexandria replies. Great, the world's most deranged child thinks I'm going to molest her. "As for the others? Pattern suggests they'll go to ground now that they're down so many members, and Watchdog believes they'll prioritise trying to locate Bonesaw before they begin recruiting. But no, Jack isn't happy. Whenever his plans are interrupted, he tends to hyper-fixate on killing or breaking the hero responsible."
"And here I am, missing an arm and a mech suit. Round two wouldn't be a very fair fight," I quip. Jack Slash got my arm, but I didn't give him the honour of putting me down for good and teleported myself out of there. Always have a backup plan. At that point, I was the last hero standing anyway.
He seemed so surprised, but I suppose he's used to things going his way more.
"I don't think he wants a fair fight. He tried that and you took down four members, even if Siberian managed to survive through some unknown aspect of her power," Alexandria points out. "But that does lead us to the next issue. The Vanguard suit."
"It's gone, believe me I know. Fucking Mannequin. I started making that thing when I was a Ward, and now it's ruined beyond repair," I cut in. "No suit, no Vanguard. My Tinkertech budget, assuming it even exists given that the entire department is dead, doesn't cover this. Even if it did? I genuinely don't think I can make another core to replace the one Hero built for me. Even Dragon couldn't recreate it, and that's her entire gimmick."
"Your budget is higher than you think, Vanguard. Aren't you forgetting something? Crawler, Bonesaw and to a lesser extent, Hatchet Face all had hefty bounties," Alexandria reminds me. "But you're not wrong that it was a massive time investment, and it will take time to get you back into fighting shape."
"Is this the part where you tell me that I am not getting sick leave because of the whole missing arm and trauma thing, and that you have some new assignment for me," I ask with a knowing sigh.
"I'm afraid so, but the arm isn't going to be as big of a concern as you think either. I take it that you've heard of Panacea?" Alexandria asks, my mind going to the moody teenage girl I saw at an Endbringer fight once.
"She's coming out to fix me up?" I ask, getting a head shake.
"Not quite. She's not leaving her hometown, you're going to it," Alexandria replies. "You've heard of Brockton Bay, right?"
"Nazi capital of America, highest crime rate in North America. Almost higher than most of South America too," I reply dryly. "It's come up once or twice. Hana moved there, right?"
God, I miss the Inaugural Wards team. Me, Double M, Mousey, Chev and Reed. Trackstar too, but he was just old enough to get put onto the big boy team instead of playing with us kids. Something he never let me forget.
"That's right. They've been requesting more heroes for years, but we've simply not had the manpower or resources to do more than maintain the status quo," Alexandria admits. "But I decided that to use your downtime as a chance to give this dark cloud a silver lining. You know about the Phoenix program?"
"Legend's pet project, if I recall correctly. A program aimed at taking supervillains and converting them into respectable Protectorate heroes. Didn't that go terribly?" I ask, getting a nod.
"The original attempt failed, yes, but Legend still believes in it and has pushed for its reinstatement," Alexandria continues.
"Wait, you want to start it up again… in Brockton Bay?" I ask, disbelief colouring my tone.
"It's just about the one place where the Phoenix program going up in flames couldn't make matters worse," Alexandria retorts with a half-shrug. "Which is where you come in. We want you to run the program, covertly."
"Covertly? How does that even work?" I ask, almost amused despite myself.
"If you go there as Vanguard, the Nine will follow in short order. I've arranged for Blonde Blazer to transfer to act as the hero supervisor. I want you to go there in your civilian persona to help run the program. It'll give you time to work on your suit without the Nine tracking you down and you are best suited for handling any potential problems," Alexandria explains.
I go to respond before pausing in thought. I know why she would think that. My specialisation is counter-technology. Effectively, I can make anything as long as I study whatever it is that I need to counter. Immensely powerful, in theory, less so in practice as it takes me a long time to study someone and their powers to work out the best counter for them and start building it.
It's why losing my suit was such a major problem, because it had a counter for damn near every type of villain in it. Brute, Blaster, Tinker, Mover, Master, Stranger, you name it, I had a countermeasure.
Even with what little documentation I have, replacing all the pieces will take me months at the most generous guesstimate. And that's just to get the most basic framework operational again. All the specialised tech is long gone and frankly, so are most of the villains I used as the basis to make the countermeasures.
You'd think that wouldn't be a problem since if the villains are gone, so is the need to counter them but some of the countermeasures worked really well in general. I built the teleport traps to counter a specific Tinker villain years ago, he's long since been killed by a rival in a prison brawl and I can't make more since I forget the details of their powers as time passes.
The reason Bonesaw's dress didn't make the trip is because the teleport tech only moved biological matter since the asshole kept hiding tinkertech in his body and using it to escape. He was really good at it and it pissed me off so much after his fifth escape that I went into a Tinker fugue and woke up with a pile of teleportation mines.
I might lose sometimes. But I almost never lose twice.
But this does mean that I can make counters for the villains we're trying to rehabilitate so we don't have a repeat of last time. If they go rogue, they will go down.
Plus, Blonde Blazer is a heavy hitter herself. The type of villains that get put into the Phoenix program tend to be ones with potentially useful but relatively 'safe' powers. They won't be heavy hitters in comparison because if you put a bunch of villains together, it's only a matter of time until they start thinking they can take their handlers.
That's what happened last time. Legend got called away and they turned on the heroes left to babysit them, formed a new gang and tried to take over New York using the Phoenix headquarters as their base of operations.
Then Legend returned and wiped the floor with them. Not the smartest bunch.
"I don't suppose just retiring to some Caribbean island with my bounty money is an option?" I ask.
"Well, beachfront property is at an all time low thanks to Leviathan," Alexandria retorts, playing along. She does have a sense of humour in there, somewhere. I think most of it died with Hero but a shard of it survived. "But no. Not because you wouldn't be allowed to, but because I know you well enough to know that you're not the quitting type."
"…damn it," I sigh.
"There's one last thing, for now," Alexandria adds.
"The 'malfunction?'," I ask with a snort.
"In all your years as Vanguard, your tech has never malfunctioned once. Dragon examined the remains, and she confirms that someone sabotaged it. Likely hours before the attack began, when you were conveniently off shift and off-base," Alexandria agrees. "Your suit was stored in the depths of the department, behind some of the best security measures designed."
"It wasn't one of my team," I say, tone clipped and angry. "It was a virus, of some type. Locked up my systems at the worst possible time. Mannequin would be a corpse if it hadn't, and my suit would have survived."
"I know. I've seen the same theorising but only you and Trackstar survived, so unless the Nine decided to clear their tracks, not something they tend to care about doing, it wouldn't make sense for it to be a traitor. Very few people had access to the hanger, and most are either dead or have been cleared," Alexandria agrees. "But that does mean that someone was able to bypass security you designed to counter just about every flavour of stranger and master power known to the PRT. Someone who knew the Nine were coming and wanted you out of the fight. How did you keep fighting?"
"Contingency plans upon contingency plans. One last gift from Hero, a backup system he built into my mechs systems. Remember the fight against- god, I can't remember who it was. They knocked me out when they hit my mech and my head slammed against the cockpit wall?" I reminisce.
"Brutedozer. Always was a stupid name," Alexandria snorts.
"Stupid name but he hit harder than you. Punched my mech so hard he sent me pinballing around the cockpit. I almost died there, because they knocked my mech into the bay. Trackstar got me out before the mech sank. Hero realised that as good as my mech was, it only worked if I was awake to pilot it so he set up some contingency plans to let the mech function even if I wasn't. I activated them, overriding my usual controls which the virus was fucking with," I explain, seeing her sigh fondly. "Still saving my ass, even now."
"Of course he is," Alexandria agrees softly. "I'll leave you to your soap opera. We'll be in touch, Robert."
Watching her leave, I pause for a moment to consider what the fuck this means. Brockton Bay? Of all the assignments I could get, they're sending me there?
Maybe it's a punishment for fucking up as badly as I did. My job was to have a counter for every eventuality, and I fucked that one up hard.
Adding a team of 'rehabilitated' ex-villains into the powder keg of Brockton Bay? And I'm supposed to babysit them and make sure they don't run wild?
Either this is a punishment or they have an extreme amount of faith in my ability to handle this shit. I guess San Fran was the most efficient PRT team until this clusterfuck. What's that saying again?
The only reward for good work… is more work.
Sometimes, life just isn't fair.
Turning up the tv, I pause. Wait, how are they back together? They just split up over her cheating?! Shit, do they do reruns. I think I missed an important plot development here.
She's pregnant?!
— Days Later —
Arriving at the new building that the PRT arranged for the Phoenix Program in Brockton Bay, I look it over with a curious eye. It's no Rig, that's for sure. Apparently the Chief-Director wants to keep this experiment separate from the ENE Branch and it shows.
Entering the door, I can't help but notice that the place seems more or less dead as I move through, following the directions I was given.
"Over here!" a voice calls, as my coworker comes into view. Blonde Blazer lives up to the name, literally glowing with energy as she flies over to me and lands, the light fading. "You must be Robert. Or do you prefer Mr Robertson? The file just said you don't like people shortening your name and-"
"Robert is fine," I say easily. "And I have a file?"
"Everyone has a file, but yes. And yes, I am aware of your circumstances, Vanguard. Don't worry, most of our new heroes aren't here yet," Blazer reassures me with a smile. "New Wave are due in… three hours, to replace your arm, so we have time to show you around and let you get settled in."
"So, how did you get roped into looking after the Phoenix Program?" I ask as she leads me through the halls, getting a quiet laugh from her.
"I was in New York before coming here, Legend requested that I take the position and you can't really say no to a Triumvirite member. N-not that I would have, of course! The Phoenix Program is a chance for these people to do some real good!" Blazer rambles. "Sorry, I didn't mean- how about you? I was shocked to hear that you're going back into action already, even if you'll be behind a desk this time. Why jump right back into business?"
"Partially because Alexandria asked me to. As you said, you can't really say no to one of those three," I shrug, which looks weird with only one arm. "But honestly? I've never been good at downtime. I've been a hero since I was twelve, and knowing that there's work to be done while I was sitting around feeling sorry for myself would have killed me."
She doesn't respond, just giving me a smile as she leads me into her office.
"So, how much were you told about this project?" Blazer asks, gesturing for me to take a seat.
"Just that Legend wants to give his former failed project a second shot. In Brockton Bay, of all places," I chuckle.
"Yes, well, Director Piggot has been asking for more heroes for about as long as she's been a director," Blazer explains. "Of course, she wasn't thrilled to learn that the heroes she was getting wouldn't be in her chain of command and also were former villains but still."
"Ouch. Lemme guess, she hates us already?" I ask.
"Well, I wouldn't say hate but she's already been given a sanction over trying to overextend her authority to us. Like I said, she isn't thrilled," Blazer admits. "But the Phoenix Program is only half the experiment here. Have you heard of the SDN program?"
"Vaguely. Didn't it get shelved for being classist or something like that?" I reply, stroking my chin. I remember hearing about the idea, a subscription service to be able to call superheroes for aid.
"Pretty much. Costa-Brown has brought it back for a trial run within Brockton Bay, and that's where we come in," Blazer admits. "The Superhero Dispatch Network is officially live in Brockton Bay, and is several degrees of separation away from the main Protectorate chain of command. The hope is that the more financially motivated villains, rogues and independents will be more willing to join up if they're working for the program rather than the Protectorate, with more lenient contracts, potentially better pay and easier exit clauses."
"Wait, am I here to help with the Phoenix Program or the Superhero Dispatch Network?" I ask, getting a laugh from her.
"Both!" Blazer admits.
"She's such a slave driver," I sigh, mentally cursing Alexandria as Blonde laughs again.
"Alexandria just has faith in you. You're basically Triumvirate adjacent. Hero's successor," Blazer points out. "I had your action figure growing up."
"Wait, which one?" I ask curiously.
"The one of your original blue mech design, before you repainted it. Vanguard Alpha," Blazer admits with a small blush. "Why did you repaint your mech?"
"Blue and gold was Hero's colour scheme, and I was going through a rebellious phase. I didn't want people to think he did all the work on my mech," I reply with a small laugh. "Every Tinker was living in his shadow, but I got it doubly hard since I was seen as his protege. You can only see so many 'Hero's student defeats villain of the week' articles until you get a little pissed, especially when you're a fourteen year old boy."
She doesn't respond for a moment, seeing that I'm deep in my thoughts. I shake my head, giving her a smile.
"So, I can't help but notice that this place is a ghost town. Are we working with a skeleton crew here?" I ask.
"Honestly? More or less, for now at least. If we want to get any real funding, we need to prove that the program and the network have potential," Blonde Blazer admits with a wry grin. "But, it's not too bad! We do have some genuine heroes working with the network to help fill in while our program members get used to their new lease on life. Come on, I'll show you to your office so we can get to know our new teammates."
I'll admit, as I enter my new office. It's a bit of a downgrade compared to the one I had as the head of the San Fran branch. Moving to the computer, I take a seat as she stands behind me and watches me turn it on.
"Dragon designed the system, so it's pretty reliable," Blonde explains as I load up the Dispatch program, seeing the map of Brockton Bay, with areas marked out as 'territory' showing the usual stomping ground of each villainous gang. "As you can see, the situation in Brockton Bay is… dire and it's likely going to get worse before it gets better. Lung's arrest has really stirred up the hive, and a minor crime lord named Coil was assassinated recently so his territory is up for grabs."
"Perfect time for a band of barely-reformed villains to join the show," I quip, following her instructions as I open up the files on our staff. Four familiar faces stare back at me as I curse. "Oh, for- please tell me this is a joke? These dumbasses."
"Sorry, Robert, but no. Meet the three heroes that have transferred to the Brockton Bay SDN branch. I believe you know Brainbook, Brickhouse, Pom Pom and Equilibrium," Blazer introduces.
"I'm going to kill them," I reply simply. "They're Wards. What the hell are they thinking, following me here?"
These four clowns happen to be the latest generation of San Fran Wards. The last time I saw them, I was ordering them out of the situation with the Nine after Hatchet Face had tried to target them specifically.
"You'd have to ask them, but they've done the paperwork and they're here until such a time as the San Francisco branch reopens and is under 'proper' leadership again," Blonde admits with a small smile. That sounds an awful lot like they're saying 'they're staying here until I go back.' These stubborn- ugh. "Brainbook was offered a position in Watchdog, after you had them extract Watchdog from the chaos, but she refused."
"Of course she did," I groan. How did they even get their parents permission to follow me to Brockton Bay of all places? "Won't this risk my identity?"
"They've all signed the NDAs, but yes. I won't deny that the entire Ward branch moving here but not joining the PRT itself has… raised some eyebrows. Either way, I won't deny that it's been very helpful to have the four. They're good heroes, and they've already won some hearts for SDN."
"They are," I admit, a hint of pride in my voice. "I'm still going to kick their asses for this stunt."
"That's what I said," a familiar voice grunts, getting my attention to the old, black man standing in the doorway, making me rise to face him. "You look like shit."
"Look who's talking, old man. You were always old as shit, but what the fuck happened to you?" I ask, rushing forward to give the short, grumpy black einstein looking motherfucker a hug.
"That psycho bitch happened," Trackstar, or Chase, grumbles. "Last thing I remember, you'd teleported me and the creepy little bastard away. Woke up looking like I'd aged thirty years. Turns out, the bitch had cut my head open so she could play surgeon with my connection to my power. Now? Any time I try to use it, I age like a motherfucker. You know she told me that I was a bad man for swearing while she cut me open?"
"She called me a pedophile, apparently," I joke, getting a snort out of him.
"Yeah, I think I remember her freaking out when we arrived butt-ass naked. Still, fact is, until we find a way to fix her little fuck up, I'm shit out of luck on my powers," Chase admits. "So I'm here like you are, out of costume."
"Can't Panacea do anything about it?" I ask.
"She doesn't do brains, and that's where Bonesaw was tinkering about. She fixed some stuff up, stopped my ancient heart from stopping outright, but she can't fix the main issue. Even if she could return me to my younger age, I'd be ancient again the second I used my powers," Chase points out. "Don't look so down, kid. You saved my ass, don't think I don't know that."
"Kid? I'm in my thirties, old timer," I laugh. "Guess we're even."
"The fuck we are. I've pulled your dumbass out of the fire way more times than you've saved me. You still owe me," Chase snorts, bumping me with his shoulder. "And you'll always be that snot-nosed brat who needed my help to ask Mouse out on a-"
"Okay, fair point now, shut it," I grumble, hearing Blonde giggle. "So, how the fuck did you let those four dumbasses follow us to Nazi central?"
"Let them? Bitch, you think I was up and about the day after Lil Miss Nightmare played with my brain? You were awake before I was, sulking about your suit and arm, don't blame this on me," Chase points out. "They'd already made their minds up and done all the paperwork before I was even out of bed. Fact is, most of them are nearly old enough to graduate anyway, except Equilibrium but who the fuck knows how old she actually is with the whole giant living origami thing. Case 53's are always a guess when it comes to age. If we stopped them, we'd have a couple of months before they showed up anyway. You taught them a little too well because they inherited your endless fucking stubbornness. Stupid fucking kids."
"Yeah, I'm kicking their asses for this. How'd they get their parents to agree?" I ask rhetorically.
"My guess? Brainbook. You know what it's like arguing with her. Realistically, your protocols got the families of all the Wards and Heroes out of the city at the start of the shitshow and I'm guessing they were still shellshocked that they survived a Slaughterhouse attack and Brainbook blitzed their asses, reminding them that they were all alive because of you and yada yada yada," Chase snorts.
"Damnit, I need to send the letters to the families of everyone we lost and-"
"Already done, and don't give me that look. I know it's your responsibility which is why I impersonated you and signed them in your name. Don't act surprised, ain't the first time I've forged your signature," Chase admits.
"Thanks, Chase," I say simply. "Sorry, Blonde Blazer. Kinda left you out, I just-"
"I get it, trust me I do," Blazer waves off. "So, let's meet the rest of your team!"
As I retake my seat, Chase follows behind and snorts.
"I've gotta say, Robert. These are the biggest bunch of fuck-ups, losers and assholes I've seen," Chase admits, as I open up the files of the Phoenix Program.
I'll deal with dumb, dumb, dumber and dumbest later. I know this shit was Brainbook's idea. All Intelligence, no Wisdom. I've told her about- ugh, never mind.
As I open the first file, staring into the literal bat-faced former villain, I skim Sonar's profile with a sigh before pausing.
"Wait, so this guy is a Case 53 who literally turns into a giant monster bat and he got arrested for running a crypto-scam?" I ask, looking at his record.
"Along with embezzlement, drug possessions, forgery, fraud, money laundering and… cyberbullying," Blonde Blazer admits.
"He's a smart-ass who thinks he's a hell of a lot smarter than he is, and cares about money more than anything else. He's also a junkie who is barely following his Narcotics Anonymous plan," Chase buts in.
"Which brings us to our next hero, Malevola. She's his NA sponsor," Blazer explains.
"That is a whole-ass demon wearing high-heels and denim shorts," I point out. "Assault, burglary, extortion, kidnapping, second degree murder… and also forgery."
"She worked with Sonar on one of his scams," Blazer explains. "But she's powerful. Brute package, portal creation, regeneration and she can transfer wounds not herself."
"Creepy as shit, I swear she gets off to it," Chase mutters as I click next.
"Okay, that's just a pile of dirt. Are all our heroes Case 53s?" I ask, knowing full well that getting the public to accept Case 53s is a challenge all by itself, without the SDN and ex-villain thing.
"No, Golem is the last monstrous cape at the moment," Blazer explains. "Golem is fairly relaxed, all things considered. He isn't actually a Case 53. He was made by a Tinker. He's literally mud brought to life. All of his crimes were committed as he followed his creators orders before Golem turned on them, resulting in them both being arrested."
"Could be worse, I suppose," I agree, clicking next as a black woman with a silver domino mask and wings appears. "Am I reading this right, she's a mob hitman?"
"Former, but yes. Coupe has the power of Umbrakinesis, and she's very… efficient. Sixty eight confirmed kills. Yeah, I know," Blazer admits.
"You do remember that the strongest gang in Brockton Bay are literal nazis, right?" I ask, clicking next as a next black woman appears with blue and pink dyed hair. "Does this say she gained her powers during a singing contest, immediately set her opponents on fire for beating her, and then made a song about it?"
"Yeah…" Blazer agrees. "She was… well, think Uber and Leet but with more music and less video games and you've got the right idea. Obsessed with popularity."
"Like I said, Robert. Fuck ups," Chase points out as I read Prism's powers. Light control? Illusions? Not bad, but her personality report is worrying. I'm not sure she realises that she's supposed to be a hero, not a pop star.
Oh hey, this one looks normal and never mind he's three foot tall.
"Punch Up. The usual brute package, super strength, endurance and regeneration. He's not actually that bad, most of the time," Blazer tries optimistically.
"As long as he's sober, which he rarely is. I know, the Irish guy is always drunk. Cliche as fuck," Chase snorts. "Most of his crimes come from his drinking."
Battery, second-degree murder, public intoxication, public urination and sexual assault?
"He's not that kind of sex offender. He's called Punch Up for a reason and one of his victims got him with that charge after Punch Up repeatedly punched them in the genitals," Blazer explains quickly.
"Lovely," I reply, switching to a girl with short spikes dark violet hair, who is holding a middle finger up at the camera. "Invisibitch? She actually called herself that?"
"Yeah… I renamed her Invisigal," Blazer admits. "She can be… difficult to work with."
"Invisibitch was right. She's been at the bottom of the leader boards since day one," Chase snorts. "Constantly goes off mission, doesn't listen to orders, and always has an excuse why everything is anyone's fault but hers."
"Wait, leaderboard?" I ask.
"Oh, right. So, before it was moved to Brockton Bay Legend was trying this in New York again before the local government… basically kicked them out since he didn't want a repeat of last time. It's why I came with them," Blazer explains. "SDN has a scoring system, based on both the operator's review of their missions, that's us and the customer's review. Invisigal has been… struggling."
"She's literally as low as she can go. And that's below Coupe who keeps losing points by stabbing people," Chase cuts in. Yup, there she is in dead last.
I'm oddly proud to see my girls in the top four spots above all these Phoenix Program members. It's not even close either, the four are close in rank but the moment it gets past them there is a sharp drop to Flambae-
"Wait, Flambae? Didn't I arrest him? Twice?" I ask, clicking past Invisigal's file to find the last member.
"Yup. Cut off his fingers, first time. Second time, you beat his ass like a drum since you had a counter for his fires," Chase agrees.
"And you don't think it's a problem that he's working under me?" I ask, remembering the hot-tempered villain. His flames were the hottest I'd faced at that point, and the first fight was close. It's why I developed the fire suppression system in my mech.
Which saved a lot of lives against Burnscar, now that I think about it. It wasn't enough because Burnscar was frankly a hell of a lot more dangerous than Flambae but still.
"He's not working under Vanguard, he's working under Robert," Blazer says encouragingly. "Oh! That reminds me. Now that you've met your team, there's something else I need to show you."
Her excited tone makes me pause as she gets me to rise, leading me to the elevator and swiping her ID card before she presses the basement level twice. Chase just gives me a smirk as we step out into… my workshop?
"How the hell-" I start, looking around the place. Everything is almost exactly as I left it, in San Francisco… in a building that burnt down.
"Dragon, mostly," Blazer admits, turning not the lights as the large clearing lights up. My eyes definitely don't get misty as I lay my eyes on the dismantled, badly damaged and barely recognisable hunk of metal that is my suit. "She retrieved all the parts, though she couldn't fix it herself. She was at least able to recreate your workshop."
"Aww, look he's crying," Chase adds. "Like a lil bitch."
"Man, fuck you. It's dusty in here, that's all," I say, wiping at my eyes. I'll be Vanguard again, and Jack Slash is going to learn the harsh truth that so many other villains discovered.
Vanguard doesn't lose twice.
Author's Note: Dispatch is peak, and with some minor modifications for the backstories of some characters, fits into Worm all too well.
Yes, I made the tutorial team into Wards so I'd have an excuse to have the girls follow Robert to Brockton Bay.
Written: 14/11/2025