Boom——
The Astral Express suddenly shook.
Stelle glanced at the swaying chandelier in the bedroom and immediately realized something was wrong.
She turned around and spotted someone who should have left long ago.
"Uncle Yang, why are you still here?"
Welt Yang rubbed his chin. "I never said I was leaving. I just didn't expect you'd get along so well with a super-intelligent virus... Stelle is still as kind as ever."
"Thanks for the compliment. The Express seems to be in trouble. Let's go check it out together."
"Mm..."
Not long after.
Welt Yang and Stelle arrived in the parlor car, where Himeko, Dan Heng, March 7th, and Pom-Pom were already waiting.
"What happened?" Stelle asked anxiously.
Himeko sighed helplessly. "Since everyone's here, emergency announcement: bad news. The Express was just hit by a high-energy particle stream. Overall, there's no major damage, but the refrigeration system in the food storage has failed."
Pom-Pom chimed in casually, stating the severity. "Refrigeration down means the freezer's done for! Other ingredients can hold out, but the ice cream... the ice cream will all melt into water, Pom!"
Hearing this, Stelle was shocked. She looked at March 7th as if she'd made up her mind. "March 7th, it's time for us to launch the rescue plan."
March 7th stared intently and nodded solemnly. "Got it!"
With that, the two rushed toward the food storage.
Pom-Pom was puzzled. "Stelle Passenger and March Passenger are actually putting in this much effort, Pom?"
Dan Heng wore an expression of seeing through it but not saying it. "I doubt it's that simple."
...
Some time later.
Stelle and March 7th had slightly bulging bellies. As they walked, they both let out burps.
"Rescue plan successful!"
Pom-Pom didn't hold back praise. "Stelle Passenger and March Passenger were surprisingly reliable this time. What method did you use on the soon-to-melt ice cream?"
Stelle gave a thumbs-up, looking smug. "The two of us successfully rescued all the ice cream... into our stomachs."
"So much ice cream, you ate it all, Pom?"
[How to put it... it's really abstract. But I'm completely unfazed.]
[Rest assured, when these two do anything stupid together, I won't be surprised at all.]
[This segment has way too many things to roast.]
——
Another calm, uneventful day.
The three little ones sat with Pom-Pom, listening to the news broadcast.
"Welcome to today's Interastral Weather. Subspace storm No. 435 of Cycle 2158, 'Baron Samedi,' has formed in the Samiento sector. Wind radius and central sub-particle concentration have broken historical records.
Affected areas will experience spatial sequence distortions and localized high-energy particle rain.
The Interastral Peace Corporation's emergency department is prepared for rescue and disaster response. The Company reminds vessels in affected sectors to return to port promptly, residents in nearby sectors to suspend spacewalks and other outdoor activities, and to purchase appropriate meteorological insurance.
To avoid unnecessary losses. 'Your choice is absolutely worth it — Interastral Peace Insurance'!"
The broadcast ended. March 7th snapped back and looked at everyone. "It's pitch black outside, like a storm's about to hit. So scary."
Pom-Pom reassured them. "Luckily, we're on the outskirts of the affected sector. Just some simple emergency prep should do, Pom."
"Hmph!" Stelle snorted, her chuunibyou soul fully awakened. "Open the Express doors already! I want to greet the storm in the vast silence of the cosmos!"
Influenced by Stelle, March 7th clenched her fists too. "Count me in, hmph! This lady is the storm itself!"
Dan Heng looked back and forth between them. "You two... forgot last time the storm blew you nearly 0.4 light-seconds away, and you floated crying in the vast cosmic silence for five systems?"
[The speed of light is 300,000 km/s, so 0.4 light-seconds is about 120,000 km — three laps around the equator.]
[The big sick ward is still performing stably.]
[Isn't the HSR universe a vacuum?]
[It is a vacuum.]
[Then why no suffocation? Did they get blown to another planet?]
[They have the Power of Trailblaze, so they can afford to be reckless.]
[Holy crap! That's way too buggy.]
[It's actually fine — just a survival skill, doesn't affect combat.]
[Honestly, Stelle and March 7th really owe Akivili a kowtow. Without the Power of Trailblaze, those two would have graves overgrown with weeds by now.]
——
"You guys go ahead. If the conductor has to save you again this time, I'm a rabbit!"
With that, Pom-Pom left with squishy footsteps.
[So the conductor's still gonna save them?]
[Of course. The conductor remembers every Nameless's name.]
[But conductor, aren't you already a rabbit?]
[So the conductor will still save them!]
[That's our cutest conductor!]
——
Another post-dinner gathering in the parlor car for the three little ones.
March 7th excitedly showed Dan Heng. "Dan Heng, look! Stelle and I went to 'Hasbro Miracle Gacha Planet,' pooled our money, and got a box of 'Hamster Phantom Thieves' capsules! This time, we're definitely getting the hidden 'Abundance Sunflower'!"
[Wait, the amount of references here is forcing even this long-time non-commenter to react.]
[I can only say one sentence contains way too many elements.]
[HSR's meme power is predictably top-tier.]
[Let me count: Hasbro, gacha capsules, Ocean's Eleven, Plants vs. Zombies... yeah, the elements are pretty stacked!]
——
Stelle chimed in from the side. "The scene of the north and south hemispheres of Gacha Planet splitting open and spraying out capsules was so spectacular!"
"'Hasbro Miracle Gacha Planet'... sigh." Dan Heng seemed unimpressed by Stelle's description and shook his head helplessly. "The Company always likes turning their commercial monopoly planets into these bizarre knockoffs."
March 7th flashed a charming smile. "Look on the bright side! It's now an unmissable check-in spot for interstellar travelers!"
"Too bad I still prefer natural landscapes."
[Same here.]
[A lot of cities have turned into influencer spots these days, sometimes losing their original charm.]
[The Company's basically squeezing every last drop of value from the planet. If planets can be opened like capsules, do you think that one will still be usable later?]
[I'm with Teacher Dan Heng — I prefer natural scenery too. Artificial ones just don't hit the same.]
[It's all personal taste. Some like it, some don't — totally normal.]
——
Next moment, Dan Heng changed the subject. "That said, gacha blind boxes are actually interesting items. Not long ago I read an article by a young student from an armed archaeology school, researching how to assess artifact value in ancient tombs without damaging them."
He paused deliberately. "I wonder if the principle is similar to these gacha blind boxes? Of course, it's just theory — I haven't had a chance to test it!"
March 7th's lips curved up slightly. She raised an eyebrow at Stelle. "Heh, perfect timing, right? Stelle, bring out our blind box and let Master Twist inspect it!"
Stelle got the hint and handed Dan Heng a capsule, still teasing. "Here you go, Master Twist!"
[Master Twist? Hahahaha.]
[Kids, you two are unbeatable.]
[Seriously, if I were Dan Heng I'd struggle not to get corrupted!]
[Did you guys get it? Need me to explain?]
[Shut up.]
[Got it — Dan and dan (egg) are homophones. Hilarious!]
——
Dan Heng looked utterly defeated. "Don't call me that..."
He knew it probably wouldn't work, but he had to at least try.
The bare minimum dignity had to be maintained.
Soon, water stains continuously emerged in his palm, slowly enveloping the capsule.
"By using the Cloudhymn Roar to manipulate water flow against the capsule, the echoes and intensity reflected in the water can outline the rough shape of the toy inside..."
[Holy crap, ultrasonic detector!]
[Teacher Dan Heng, physics master!]
[Didn't expect Cloudhymn Roar to have this application.]
[One Hundred Uses of Cloudhymn Roar!]
[Hahaha, Dan Heng's turned Cloudhymn Roar from combat to chores to capsule scanning.]
[2333333!]
——
Next moment, Dan Heng smiled. "Got it — this is it!"
The water flow in his hand slowly shifted until it formed a hamster shape.
Seeing this, even Stelle couldn't help exclaiming. "Cloudhymn sonar??? Bro, are you a bat???"
[Hahaha, the kid's shocked!]
[I told you Cloudhymn Roar is all-purpose.]
[This is called Sonic Dragon!]
[Ahahahaha!]
[This is peak entertainment.]
March 7th shook her head. "I don't get it, but I'm deeply shaken!"
She turned to Stelle. "Stelle, looks like next time we go to Gacha Planet, we have to bring Master Twist!"
Stelle nodded seriously, agreeing. "Master Twist, we can't do without you!"
Dan Heng didn't refuse — just sighed helplessly. "I said don't call me that..."
Just then.
Welt Yang arrived with a box of board games. "What are you all talking about? So lively?"
"Oh, Uncle Yang, we're praising Master Twist!" March 7th replied.
"Master Twist?" Welt Yang glanced at Dan Heng and smiled. "I see. You guys free right now? I brought back a super fun board game — wanna play?"
Stelle and March 7th immediately raised their hands. "Yay!"
Finally, Welt Yang looked at Dan Heng. "Dan Heng, you in?"
Dan Heng shrugged. "Count me in."
...
Not long after.
The Express's five-person group settled on the sofas.
March 7th explained to Stelle. "Hell's Mystery Night — supposedly the hottest board game among Xianzhou Yaoqing youth right now. Finally got enough players for a round!
Rules are simple: two camps — borisin and foxian. Borisin can eliminate one foxian each night, while foxians need to save the borisin before they're all wiped out!"
[Insane! Werewolf! HSR's meme quality keeps rising!]
[It's Werewolf?]
[No, it's Borisin Kill!]
[Wait, shouldn't it be Goose Duck Kill?]
Stelle scratched her head. "Whoa, isn't this game a bit too hellish?"
Dan Heng gave his view. "The more terrifying something is, the more it needs to be deconstructed and disenchanted."
[So Dan Heng, you're not scared of Blade?]
[This comment section is too hellish!]
["The more terrifying something is, the more it needs to be deconstructed and disenchanted"!]
"Let's draw roles quick. I'm pretty confident in games like this!" Welt Yang looked eager.
[Obviously — look who his opponents were in HI3.]
[Old Yang really has authority here — he plays the real-life version of Werewolf.]
——
Five cards on the table.
Everyone drew one and held it.
The camera focused on Stelle — the only borisin in the game.
Not long after it started, Stelle flashed a confident smile. "Everyone, I am the borisin!"
March 7th blinked in confusion. "Why'd you just self-destruct?"
"Hm? Haven't grasped the rules yet?" Himeko guessed.
"Hmph hmph!" Stelle stayed smug. "I fully understand the rules. Yes, I am the borisin!"
"Uh... well... in that case, let's vote Stelle out!" March 7th really couldn't follow Stelle's play.
Just then.
Welt Yang and Dan Heng spoke in unison. "Hold on!"
Dan Heng went first. "From what I know of Stelle, her seemingly brainless actions often hide deeper goals!"
Welt Yang offered his deduction. "Could it be... her role is the 'Dumb Fox' — the one who wins instantly if not voted out?"
[This is you think I'm on the first layer, but I'm actually on the fifth?]
[Haven't seen the mille-feuille theory in ages!]
[Stelle must have her reasons!]
[So scholar meets soldier — reason can't win.]
[The highest level of game theory is refusing to play!]
[Stelle looks dumbest, but she's actually the smartest!]
——
Stelle kept smiling. "Heh heh heh, what do you think?"
The trap she set sparked an endless chain of suspicion, rippling through the parlor car...
When in reality, she was the true borisin!
[The Express has left the atmosphere, but Stelle's still on the surface.]
[Or maybe Stelle's just anti-logic. She's absurd, but that doesn't mean zero IQ.]
[So who's the one without wisdom on the Express?]
[You think this lady's dumb or something?]