Chung Myung tried to stand when he saw Hyun Jong approaching, but Hyun Jong gently motioned for him to remain seated before settling down beside him.
Hyun Jong smiled faintly as he looked at him.
"What? Was that too frivolous for a sect leader to do?"
"It isn't that…"
"I wasn't born a sect leader either."
Hyun Jong gazed bitterly at the flowing river.
"When I first entered Mount Hua, I had more freedom than I do now."
"…Uh?"
"Hmm. That's a strange way to put it. Rather than saying I was free, it's more accurate to say I had no rules to follow."
Chung Myung nodded quietly. Thinking about it, that made sense.
People of higher age and rank naturally disappeared one by one; even fellow sahyungs who had trained together suddenly left Mount Hua. If the sect was properly maintained, it would be strange if that didn't happen.
Hyun Jong, Hyun Sang, and Hyun Young—the three Hyun disciples currently guarding Mount Hua—were not the only ones who entered as Hyun disciples at the start. Many had left, and only these three remained.
"I didn't know I would become sect leader. When I arrived, my rank wasn't high. There were quite a few sahyungs before me."
"…"
"Of course, I thought the Great Sahyung would become sect leader."
"That man from back then?" Chung Myung asked bluntly. Hyun Jong laughed at the mention.
"Right. I thought that man would become sect leader."
"…"
Hyun Jong glanced at Chung Myung's face and slowly shook his head.
"But I know one thing."
"…"
"The man you saw back then must have been incredibly bad."
"I won't deny it."
If he had seen that person become sect leader of Mount Hua, Chung Myung might have felt compelled to destroy Mount Hua. Even if he hadn't given up on it, he would have tried to remove that sect leader by any means.
Looking back, it was truly fortunate that someone trustworthy held the position.
"But Chung Myung, sahyung wasn't always like that."
"…"
"The sahyung I saw when I was young was a great person. At least in my eyes then, he seemed capable of taking charge of the declining Mount Hua and raising it up."
Hyun Jong slowly shook his head.
"But that's how time works. It turns a young man with great dreams into a greedy old man, and a timid young man with a soft heart into someone who takes responsibility for a sect."
Hyun Jong paused and mumbled quietly.
"I have always been grateful to you."
Chung Myung tried to speak, but Hyun Jong continued as if he had more to say.
"It's not because you led Mount Hua. It's not because you did what I should have done. The only reason I've always felt grateful is because you trusted me."
"…Everyone in Mount Hua trusts you, sect leader."
"Right. Maybe. But… it's a little different, isn't it?"
Chung Myung couldn't answer immediately.
Surely, everyone in Mount Hua trusted Hyun Jong. However, they didn't fully trust him from the start.
Even the elders and the Un disciples probably didn't believe Hyun Jong, as sect leader, could revive Mount Hua. They simply followed him because he was sahyung.
Chung Myung was the only one who trusted Hyun Jong completely.
Hyun Jong's authority didn't come from anywhere else. Chung Myung, who bit everyone else like a mad dog, only obeyed Hyun Jong's words, so those who saw that naturally came to respect and trust Hyun Jong.
Hyun Jong, the person in question, knew this fact all too well.
"As much as I'm grateful to you, I've tried very hard to become a person worthy of being sect leader of Mount Hua. Even so… it's not easy."
"…Sect leader."
"You always told me what a sect leader should be. But I still don't know if I deserve it."
Hyun Jong smiled.
"There's nothing you can do about a person's nature."
The sky was darkening, stars ready to pour down at any moment. Hyun Jong stared at the sight and said,
"Shaolin didn't plan on moving to the Southern Lands."
"…"
"You already knew they would do that, right?"
Chung Myung nodded, then softly added,
"Sect leader had guessed it too."
"Yes. I did guess it. But I didn't want to give up on a single ray of hope. No, maybe I wanted to buy us more time. While I awaited the obvious answer, I could make excuses for myself—that I wasn't ignoring what was happening on the other side of the river and that I was doing something."
Hyun Jong gave a hollow laugh.
"Did you say there's a price for letting go of a day?"
"…"
"Yes. I understood what that was. I understood it. But Chung Myung…"
Hyun Jong's voice was bitter.
"Even when I knew the price… even if I didn't, I'm too timid to face reality head-on."
"Sect leader…"
Hyun Jong looked into the distance. Chung Myung couldn't tell what his lonely gaze was fixed on.
"You said it."
"…"
"There aren't many things in the world divided into right and wrong. No matter what you choose, it's just different, so it isn't wrong."
Chung Myung nodded. That was definitely what he had said to Hyun Jong.
"But Chung Myung…"
Hyun Jong sighed deeply.
"Not being wrong doesn't mean being right."
"…"
"That sounds like saying there are no right answers in the world. If I have to choose something I cannot choose, and there's no right answer or better path, which one should I choose?"
Chung Myung saw it—the tips of Hyun Jong's fingers, slightly exposed from his sleeve, trembled.
"…I don't have the courage to turn away from those dying across the river."
"…"
"But I don't have the courage to cross the river either. I told you all you should know how to sacrifice your lives for righteousness, but I don't have the confidence to see you lose your lives across that river."
Hyun Jong slowly stroked his face, looking exhausted for some reason.
"It's not something I can choose. I'm too small to handle that choice."
He readily admitted, as he always did, that he was a small and inadequate person. Chung Myung could vaguely guess the countless worries and self-reproach that had tormented Hyun Jong for a long time.
Hyun Jong spoke, still fixing his gaze on the sky.
"I was so angry when I heard the abbot's words."
"…"
"It was such a cowardly and… wicked act. It seemed he was only interested in pursuing profit. It was truly an ugly sight."
Hyun Jong's voice grew heavier as he recalled his conversation with the abbot.
"But… I suddenly had a thought on my way back."
Hyun Jong slowly closed his eyes and mumbled,
"Maybe I… don't even have the courage to be cowardly?"
"…"
"The abbot's choice might be cowardly, but there's a reason. He doesn't want to see his disciples die across the river. Even if he gets criticized, cursed, and blamed for losing the deal, he showed his will to stand firmly on his disciples' side and protect them."
"Sect leader…"
"If what you say is true, then that isn't wrong either. Is it really wrong?"
"…"
"Maybe… yes, maybe that's another form of courage. Just like elder Heo Do's past choice, the abbot may also know what he must do. Those who don't know what they must do are… me."
Chung Myung quietly looked at Hyun Jong's face. Even in the darkness, his eyes looked red. At that moment, Chung Myung couldn't help but sigh.
"I don't know. What is the source of the difference between them and me? Is it simply because there was no sahyung to learn from? If not…"
"It isn't that."
Chung Myung shook his head firmly.
"What Mount Hua had to pass on has already been passed to the sect leader. If everything were done according to the will of the ancestors, there would be no reason for future generations to come."
"…"
"Those who don't worry about themselves are not truly alive, even if they are alive."
"Right. That must also…"
Hyun Jong nodded and turned his gaze. His reddened eyes stared at Chung Myung.
"So, Chung Myung…"
"Yes, sect leader."
"Just a little…"
Hyun Jong paused, seeming to struggle with the words. After a moment, he finally pushed the heavy words out.
"…cowardly behavior is fine, right?"
"…"
His voice trembled. It seemed painful to say such things in front of his disciples. The Five Swords, listening from behind, couldn't help but notice the tremble in Hyun Jong's voice. Everyone lowered their heads, unable to look at their sect leader.
"I also know… this is shamelessness. It's a horrible choice, just like Shaolin's… but I don't know. I really don't know why we should be the only ones to do this."
"…"
"Even Shaolin and Wudang close their eyes and ignore their own cowardice, so why should only Mount Hua face the problems head-on? Why… for what purpose?"
Chung Myung closed his eyes tightly.
This was the question he had once asked Chung Mun: why did it have to be Mount Hua? Why did only Mount Hua have to go ahead?
He had shouted with anger and hatred. Now Hyun Jong was asking him the same question.
Hyun Jong sighed and continued.
"There will be something to gain by not avoiding it. Yes, surely there will be something."
"…"
"But what you gain that way… is it greater than what you will lose because of it?"
Hyun Jong shook his head without waiting for an answer.
"That cannot be. I don't have the confidence to say so."
"…Sect leader."
"I… don't have the confidence to say that Baek Cheon, who died for righteousness, was great. I don't have the courage to smile in front of Yoon Jong's grave, nor to pay tribute at that brat Jo Gul's coffin! I don't even have the courage to hold Yiseol's body and cry."
"…"
"To me…"
Hyun Jong's chin trembled.
"Are you telling me to leave your cold corpse behind and admonish the surviving disciples to follow the same path? For me?"
Hyun Jong's voice grew emotional.
"The pride we have in the path we must achieve now! Is it more important than the days those children will live? Should we give up everything they will enjoy in their future lives for that cause? For what purpose?"
"…"
"In this case…"
Hyun Jong, who had been shouting in agitation, soon laughed as if everything was meaningless.
"It would have been better to remain a small sect in Shaanxi…"
Unable to watch that expression any longer, Chung Myung closed his eyes.
"If I had known that reclaiming the Mount Hua of the past would come at such a harsh price… I would never have decided to do it."
"…"
"I would never have…"
Hyun Jong lowered his head as if collapsing.
Chung Myung couldn't bear to look in that direction and stared at the flowing river.
"Sahyung."
A low sigh escaped him.
"It's so tough, sahyung."
Chung Mun's answer never came.