The day dawned soft and golden, the kind of morning that felt like it was blessing us.
I woke early in the bridal suite, the white curtains billowing in the breeze, light flooding the room in warm, forgiving hues.
My heart was thudding in my chest.
Not from fear.
Not like before.
Back then, when our marriage was for show, I had sat in front of a mirror and told myself to be brave, to be convincing.
This time, I didn't have to convince anyone.
Especially not myself.
I lay there a long moment, just listening to the hush of the room.
There was a knock on the door.
"Mommy?"
Sebi's small voice.
I sat up too fast, dizzy with nerves.
"Come in."
He padded in, barefoot on the polished floor, his hair a riot of soft curls.
He was already in his little slacks and suspenders, shirt slightly wrinkled from sleep.
He carried a tiny navy bow tie clutched in one hand.
"Can you help?" he asked.
My throat closed up.
I motioned him closer, my fingers carefully tying the bow.
He held so still.
When i finished, he grinned at me.
"You look beautiful already, Mommy."
I pressed my forehead to his, blinking hard.
"Thank you,"I whispered.
This boy.
My reason for everything.
-
By the time my hair and makeup team arrived, Sebi had been whisked away downstairs to wait with Raphael's parents.
I sat still while brushes flicked over my face, while soft curls were pinned in place.
I watched my reflection.
Older than before.
Five years changed me.
Five years as a mother.
Five years building a business, standing on my own, waking up alone.
I thought of China, of cold nights in a strange apartment, arms empty, belly full with life.
How i'd cried, missing Raphael even while telling myself this was for him.
Because it was.
I hadn't left because i stopped loving him.
I left so he could go.
So he could be everything he wanted to be.
Without me holding him back.
And he had.
Oxford.
Research published.
A reputation that was saving lives here now that he was back.
I had watched from a distance when I could bear it.
Seen the hospital press releases.
Healed children, grateful parents.
It hurt sometimes.
But it also felt worth it.
He'd told me once, after we reunited, that he hated me for leaving.
But that he'd also understood.
That he wished i'd trusted him enough to stay.
I took a shaky breath.
-
Today wasn't about the guilt.
Today was about fixing what i broke.
Today was about promising i wouldn't run again.
-
I stood carefully in my gown.
No veil.
Raphael said he wanted to see my face the whole time.
The dress was simple ivory silk, long sleeves, fitted to my waist, a train that whispered over the hotel floor.
I turned one last time in the mirror.
And told myself:
You're ready.
-
The car ride to the garden venue felt unreal.
Sebi sat between my parents in the back seat, chattering away in three languages like the little diplomat he was.
He kept announcing, "My mommy and daddy are getting married!" to anyone who would listen.
My mother squeezed my hand and gave me a teary smile.
She hadn't judged me for leaving.
She hadn't blamed me for keeping Sebi from them.
They'd only welcomed us home.
They had Sebi for five years to make up for now, and they were determined to try.
-
We pulled up to the venue.
The gardens were awash in gold light.
White chairs lined a brick path.
Flowers everywhere.
And at the end of it all—
Raphael.
Waiting.
My knees almost buckled.
He wore a dark suit, perfectly cut.
No tie.
He'd left the top button undone because i liked it.
When he saw me, he smiled.
It wasn't big.
But it was real.
Solid.
A man who knew what he wanted, and wasn't about to let go again.
Sebi ran ahead and stopped halfway down the aisle, waving wildly.
"Mommy! Hurry up!"
The guests laughed.
My father kissed my cheek.
"Ready?" he asked gently.
I nodded, breath shaking.
We walked.
Raphael's eyes didn't leave mine.
I remembered them tired and hollow in the hospital that day we told him Sebi was his.
I remembered them bloodshot and angry when he yelled at me outside a restaurant while i was drunk.
I remembered them desperate when he kissed me on that park bench, telling me i was all he'd ever wanted.
And i remembered them soft, so heartbreakingly gentle, when he took care of me the day after.
I remembered every single shade of his love.
When my father handed me over, Raphael's fingers tightened around mine.
"Hi,"he whispered.
I swallowed.
"Hi."
He brushed his thumb over my knuckles.
"You're shaking," he murmured.
I let out a breathy laugh.
"I'm fine."
"Liar," he said fondly.
-
The officiant began.
I barely heard him.
It was all Raphael.
He squeezed my hand at the right places.
Winked at Sebi when he giggled in the front row.
I caught his mother dabbing at her eyes.
Even Viviena was smiling.
When it was time for vows, I froze.
Not because i didn't know what to say.
But because i didn't know how to say enough.
I tried anyway.
"I ran away from you once,"I said softly, my voice cracking.
The guests went quiet.
"I thought it was the right thing. I thought i was giving you your dream.
But it turns out you were my dream."
My voice broke.
Raphael's thumb brushed my tears away.
"I'll never leave again," I whispered.
"I swear it. Even if you tell me to go. I'll stay."
He let out a breath that sounded like a sob.
He didn't even wait for his turn.
"I don't need perfect words,"he said roughly.
He shook his head.
"I don't need anything except you.
I don't care if you're scared.
I don't care if you think you're protecting me.
I just want you here."
He pulled me a little closer, ignoring the officiant's amused cough.
"You and Sebi. That's it for me. That's always been it."
We exchanged rings with trembling fingers.
I didn't even try to hide the tears.
Neither did he.
"You may kiss—"the officiant began, but
Raphael didn't wait.
He kissed me hard, like he was claiming every year i'd been gone.
Sebi cheered from the front.
The crowd laughed and clapped.
Raphael pulled back just enough to whisper against my lips:
"Welcome home."
-
The reception was everything i'd once dreamed of but never dared to hope for.
Not grand, but full of the people who mattered.
Sebi running around in his little suit, face sticky from cake.
Our parents sitting together, toasting us with teary eyes.
Raphael's arm always around me, like he couldn't bear to let me go for even a second.
We danced our first dance under strings of warm lights.
He held me so close i could feel his heart.
"I still can't believe you're here,"he murmured.
"I'm not going anywhere," I promised.
He kissed my temple.
"I know."
-
Near the end of the night, Sebi fell asleep on a chair, thumb in his mouth, curls damp with sweat.
Raphael scooped him up easily.
Our boy.
Our family.
We walked out of the venue together, Sebi snoring against his father's shoulder.
I held Raphael's other hand tight.
"I love you," I whispered, voice thick.
He squeezed back.
"I know," he said, smiling.
"And I love you. Always."
And this time, I believed him.
Because this time, i was staying.