"A maid cafe?" Hachiman repeated, his voice laced with skepticism.
"It's still in the experimental phase," one of the girls explained. "The word is they felt it was a bit too early to roll it out at the major electronics retailers."
"So, it's a pilot program for a project that might not even see the light of day?"
"Pretty much."
"Well," Hachiman sighed, "I suppose we might as well check it out."
The four girls began chatting excitedly as they walked.
"I've never actually been to a maid cafe before!"
"Does this mean I'm finally making my debut as a high-class lady…?"
"Maybe I should try on one of the outfits?"
"Careful," another teased. "If you dress like that in front of Hachiman, he might just lose control and pounce on you."
"Ehh? And what's the problem with that?"
"If anything, I'm counting on it."
"Shino-chi," one of them lamented, "once these two get like this, anything we say just becomes fuel for the fire."
"True enough…" Shino replied with a weary smile.
Unable to endure the direction of the conversation any longer, Hachiman finally cut in.
"Hey. Don't go forgetting I'm actually standing right here."
"Yes, sir~!" the four chimed in perfect, mocking unison.
Just then, Kit—the car's AI—announced their arrival.
"Hachiman, we are approaching the destination."
"Right. Well, listen up," Hachiman told the girls. "Today's just for fun. Don't overthink it; just enjoy yourselves."
Faris Nyan-Nyan, a maid at May Queen Nyan-Nyan, was taking a breather and looking out the window, hoping for something—anything—interesting to happen. That was when a peculiar group of five caught her eye.
"Haa… Akiba is so peaceful today-nyan… Wait, what's that? Gull-wing doors?! Talk about a lucky find-nyan! Is that a group of four high school girls? And one man leading them around…?"
Faris blinked, her eyes widening. "Nyan-nyan?! That car just drove off without a driver-nyan! Could it be a relic of a lost ancient civilization? And that man… that aura he's radiating…"
She felt a surge of genuine excitement. "Now this is interesting-nyan. I wonder if they'll come in as guests-nyan?"
In that split second, she felt her eyes lock with Hachiman's. To Hachiman, it was merely a passing glance at the shop he was about to enter, noting the presence of a maid inside. But to Faris, it felt like a spark of destiny.
"Could this be the choice of Steins Gate that Kyouma was talking about-nyan?"
Heart fluttering with anticipation, Faris cut her break short and dashed back into the cafe. As she saw the group approach the entrance, she turned to her fellow maids.
"Forgive me-nyan, but please let Faris handle those five-nyan!"
Since Faris had never made such a request before, her colleagues were surprised but quickly gave her their blessing.
"Thanks-nyan!"
"Faris-chan, wait—what about your break?" one of the girls asked.
"I cut it short-nyan! I saw them through the window-nyan."
"Oh? Was there someone who caught your eye?"
"I felt a staggering aura coming from that man-nyan!"
"I see. Well, good luck, Faris-chan. Hope it goes well!"
"Purr-fect!"
Faris smoothed her apron, her heart thumping in her chest. It's been a long time since I felt this way-nyan.
"Welcome home, Master! Welcome, my ladies! I am Faris Nyan-Nyan, and I'll be serving you today-nyan."
"Ah, nice to meet you," Hachiman replied.
"This way to your seats-nyan!"
After seating them and handing out the menus, Faris turned to Hachiman with a beaming, practiced smile.
"Master, I sense a powerful aura from you-nyan. Could it be… do you possess memories of a past life-nyan?"
Hachiman paused. Is this part of the bit? If I give her a dry rejection now, I'll kill the mood. Trying to be considerate of the cafe's atmosphere, he played along.
"No, it's not a matter of a 'past' life. I am a Dark Fairy. My memories of the old world remain vivid in my mind."
(Well, I'm a Spriggan in ALO, so technically, I'm not lying,) he justified to himself.
Behind him, the girls began to whisper.
"Hey, Shino-chi, what happened to Hachiman?"
"I think he's just reading the room and matching her energy."
"Oh, so that's it…"
"We have to play along too if something happens!"
"Wait, me too?"
"Of course!"
Faris, meanwhile, reacted to Hachiman's words with theatrical shock.
"Nyan-nyan?! To think I'd encounter a Dark Fairy in a place like this-nyan…!"
"Also," Hachiman added, feeling a bit awkward, "being called 'Master' makes me a little restless. If you can, just call me Hachiman."
"Hachiman… Hachiman… I understand-nyan! Hachiman!"
She chirped his name with genuine delight.
She doesn't seem to mind dropping the formalities at all, Hachiman thought. In fact, it feels like we've been friends for years. I guess this is what a pro looks like.
Feeling a rare surge of "service spirit," Hachiman decided to push the roleplay further.
"By the way, this girl here is a Cat Fairy and a Golem Master."
"Nyan-nyan?! Wh-what?!"
"Wait, Hachiman—!" Shino protested.
"You're a Cait Sith, aren't you? So it's accurate."
"Well, yes, but…"
"I am no mere Golem. I am more akin to an automaton—a self-moving doll."
A voice suddenly rang out from Shino's bag, and the small "Hachiman-kun" doll popped out. Faris was startled, but she didn't let her professional mask slip for a second.
"Could it be… no, it couldn't be… Is this the legendary Automaton, the 'Treasure of the Fairy Realm'-nyan?!"
"That's right," Hachiman said coolly. "I brought him along as a special guest today."
"I'm moved to tears-nyan! To think I'd see the real thing with my own eyes-nyan…!"
Hachiman leaned in and whispered to Shino under his breath. "…Hey, Shino. Why is that thing in here?"
"I… I have no idea…" Shino stammered, looking troubled.
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