The aunt In Canadawas his mother's older sister, ten years her senior.
She had moved to Canada right after getting married, so Kwon Taekjoo had barely seen her.
However, his mother and she were very close and talked almost every day. When his father and brother died in service, she had traveled thousands of miles to stay with his mother for months.
"Yes. How's Aunt doing? It's been a while since I last saw her."
"Do you remember she had surgery for a brain tumor some time ago? They said they removed it completely, but lately, she's been having vision problems and difficulty moving. She went to the hospital, and they told her it's come back…
she'll need another surgery, but the location isn't good, so she's very worried. Even if the surgery goes well, the prognosis might not be favorable this time."
"Ah…"
"But there's not much I can do from here. I can only pray that the surgery goes well and that she recovers without any complications."
It was natural to feel disturbed upon learning that a loved one, someone who had always been reliable and supportive, was about to face a life-or-death situation in a foreign country. His mother had always worried about the well-being of others, and Kwon Taekjoo and played a big role in that.
Always living on the edge of danger, had deceived his mother with the excuse that he was doing it for her, which was a great disservice to her.
"I'll take you."
"Oh, no need. I can go quickly on my own."
"You get tired driving back and forth. I don't have anything to do today, so let's go together."
"You know you don't like going to the temple."
"I also want to get some fresh air."
his mother looked at Kwon Taekjoo with a surprise expression. He gazed back calmly and said:
"Come with me today."
His mother, unusually persistent, smiled and replied:
"Alright then…"
"But is it okay for you to miss work so often."
His mother looked concerned. She seemed uneasy because her son, whom she rarely saw, had been home for several days.
"Why? You used to complain that I was always working. Now you're already tired of seeing me?"
"No, I just thought maybe you got fired from the embassy."
"Fired? No. It's just that the ambassador hasn't arrived yet."
"Reall? Don't you have anything to do if he's not here?"
"Well, more or less. My main job is to assist th ambassador."
"So, when the ambassador returns to his country, what will you do? Will you have to look for another job?"
"Well, that could happen."
His casual response deepened his mother's concern. It wasn't uncommon for her to ask occasionally how much longer Zhenya would stay in Korea.
She already dreaded the fact that his term would eventually end. She was also worried that her son might end up jobless.
"Don't worry. It's not like there's nowhere else for me to work."
"I'm just afraid you'll end up in a dangerous place again, like before. Now I see you more stable and happier, Taekjoo. That's why I wish the ambassador would stay in Korea."
His mother believed Kwon Taekjoo had left that line of work, but he never really had. Yet, she saw him as more at peace now. The only real difference was that Zhenya was always by his side.
Zhenya not only filled the emptiness in Kwon Taekjoo, but also took part in his
operations, making his work much
easier.
Before, even after successfully completing a mission, he never felt fully at ease. Taekjoocouldn't truly relax, not even at home. He had to act like everything was fine in front of his mother. If he got hurt, he would hide it and suffer in silence.
The guilt and heavy burden of
responsibility had gradually faded. Now, when Taekjoo finishes work, all he thinks about is getting home as quickly as possible.
In Zhenya's arms, he feels a calm he's never known before, his body and mind fully at ease. Taekjoo has grown accustomed to having him by his side.
"…Me too."
Taekjoo murmured, lost in deep thought. In truth, he didn't even realize what he was saying.
Kwon Taekjoo knew he couldn't expect Zhenya to stay in Korea forever, but he still wished for it.
Even though he couldn't do much for Zhenya as a partner and constantly put him in danger, Taekjoo remained selfish.
"Son, is something bothering you?"
His mother's question pulled Kwon Taekjoo out of his thoughts. He glanced at the rearview mirror and saw his serious face reflected. He quickly changed his expression.
"Me? No, why?"
"You seem to have a lot on your mind. Your expression looks so grim."
"I think it's because I didn't sleep well. Maybe I played too much?"
He tried to ease his mother's concerns with a light excuse. As always, she scolded him.
"Come on, I haven't had a break in a while. I'm just playing for a bit to blow off some steam, so please, let me enjoy it."
"What? How could playing video games relieve stress? They say it actually makes it worse. Constant exposure to violence can make your brain waves unstable."
"It's not that serious. Oh, we're here."
They arrived just in time. Despite it being a weekday and the temple not being a famous one, the parking lot was empty. He parked as close to the entrance as possible since they had to walk uphill to reach it.
The shade from the thick trees made the summer heat more tolerable, and now and then, a pine-scented breeze would pass, refreshing him.
Though the place was peaceful and pleasant, he rarely visited, always claiming to be too busy. In truth, he avoided coming because it was hard to see his mother so sad each time.
He knew all too well what her life would be like if he followed in his father's or brother's footsteps.
"Are you going all the way to the top too?"
"Yes. Since we're here, let's go."
His mother looked at Taekjoo in surprise before saying,
"Let's go,"
as she began to walk ahead.
He followed slowly; a few steps behind.
Breathing in the fresh, clean air, he relished the tranquility of the place.
Suddenly, the loud roar of an engine shattered the peace. He turned abruptly, thinking some maniac was disturbing the temple's calm.
His frown eased when he saw a familiar-colored Bugatti. His mother also exclaimed in surprise.
"Isn't that the ambassador's car?"
"Looks like it."
"How did he know we were here? Did you tell him, Taekjoo?"
"No."
"Really? Well, go quickly."
"Yes. Mom, you go on ahead."
"Alright."
Taekjoo quickly retraced his steps uphill. The Bugatti, which had driven straight into the parking lot, stopped without bothering to park properly.
Finally, the driver's door opened, and
Zhenya stepped out. Though his appearance hadn't changed at all, there was something almost unreal about him.
Zhenya didn't seem surprised to see Taekjoo approaching. It was as if he knew exactly where Taekjoo was and he was doing.
He shot him a slightly annoyed look as he walked over, but when Zhenya noticed the irritation on Taekjoo's face, he smiled.
"I told you, Taekjoo.'soon' 'means 'soon.'"
"When did you get here?"
"Just now."
Had he come straight from the airport? The phone had been silent the whole drive, so Taekjoo hadn't expected Zhenya to already be back in Korea.
If he was going to show up, he could've at least given him a heads-up. Zhenya always caught him off guard. When would he ever start acting like a normal person?
"How did you know I was here?"
"Does it matter."
"Of course it matters, you bastard! Did you put a tracker on my phone? Install some spy app?"
"Taekjoo, this is your fault. Your always get yourself into dangerous situations, and no one ever knows where you'll be."
Zhenya continued to blame others for his reckless, over-the-top behavior. Didn't he understand the word "self-reflection?" And yet, Taekjoo still chose to be in a relationship with him.
Taekjoo eyed Zhenya with irritation, scanning his bright face and body. He didn't seem to have suffered any injuries.
"Did you finish your business?"
"It's rare for you to ask about my work, Taekjoo."
"Well, it's because of me that you had to negotiate with that Mathiason guy or whatever his name is."
"True. It came at quite the cost. Do you know how much the maintenance fees are?"
Zhenya nodded and muttered mockingly. He kept grinning as if something amused him greatly. Taekjoo studied his eyes carefully, one by one, and asked cautiously:
"...You only went to handle that?"
"What else?"
"I don't know, maybe you got called back home again."
For a moment, Zhenya looked surprised, but then he smiled again. His chest puffed up slightly.
Clearly, he had misunderstood Taekjoo's words with enthusiasm.
"Taekjoo, are you still worried that I'll get engaged to someone else? Do you want to have me all to yourself?"
His tone was so light, it sounded as if he were singing.
"That's not it...!"
Taekjoo clenched his fists in frustration but then relaxed them. It wasn't worth the argument.
He scratched the back of his head irritably.
"Ah! You really give me a headache."
"Does your head hurt because you're thinking about me too much? That's actually kind of cute."
Zhenya's arrogant smile made him even more infuriating. He didn't seem to have suffered any emotional damage at all.
Taekjoo figured he could check later if there were any hidden injuries.
It wasn't clear who worried more about whom. Clicking his tongue, he shook his
head.
At that moment, Zhenya began looking around as if searching for someone.
"Does your head hurt from thinking about me so much? That's pretty adorable."
Zhenya smiled arrogantly, which made him even more irritating. He didn't seem to have suffered any psychological damage.
Kwon Taekjoo thought he might check later for any hidden wounds. It wasn't clear who was more worried about whom. He clicked his tongue and shook his head.
At the moment, Zhenya glanced around as if looking for someone.
"By the way, what happened to the little woman?"
"I told her to go ahead. But how did you know I was here with my mother."
"I've been here a few times before."
"Here? Why?"
"It's a place the little woman visits often."
Zhenya replied indifferently. Kwon Taekjoo's mother had indeed brought him to the temple several times, even though they were almost like friends.
He thought that his mother would
feel very lonely when Zhenya returned to his country. While lost in these thoughts, Zhenya took a step closer, almost pressing against him.
"What's wrong? Why are you getting so close?"
"After being so anxious, aren't you going to give me a reunion kiss?"
Zhenya pretended to be hurt, with a shameless expression. He slowly tilted his face toward Taekjoo, making his scent even stronger.
Was it because he hadn't seen him in a while? Or had he really missed him so much in those few days? Taekjoo's fingers trembled, and his
throat tightened slightly.
"Idiot. Not in front of a sacred temple. It's bad luck."
He grabbed Zhenya's face, stopping him from getting any closer. Zhenya didn't pull away.
Instead, he pressed his lips against Taekjoo's palm while responding.
"I didn't know you believed in gods, Taekjoo."
"That's exactly why. Even a small offense could provoke their wrath. Plus, my mother could see us from anywhere, and she knows you're here."
"Let's go,"
Taekjoo said, nodding toward the entrance above. He tried to remove his hand
from Zhenya's face, but Zhenya suddenly grabbed his wrist. Before Taekjoo could react,
Zhenya licked his palm. As the line of his hand dampened, Taekjoo's shoulders tensed
involuntarily.
"Ah, what are you doing?"
"I'm hungry. I need a taste before causing any trouble. Since I can't bite your lips, I'll have to settle for this."
Zhenya bit down firmly on the lower part of Taekjoo's palm before releasing his arm. Seeing
the clearly visible teeth marks, Taekjoo felt a wave of revulsion.
"Do you really think you're a dog."
"You should be proud I held back with just one bite."
"Proud of what? Just make sure you don't mess up in front of my mother."
"You worry too much. It's not the first time I've seen the little woman. Besides, she likes me."
"Well, I don't know if my mother would like you as much if she knew you're glued to her son day and night."
Arguing, they made their way to the temple. His mother had already entered the sanctuary and was out of sight.
He had no intention of praying with her, so he quietly watched the serene man beside him.
"Why does the little woman keep coming here?"
Zhenya, who had been following silently, asked with a bored expression. Although he sometimes accompanied his mother, didn't he know the purpose of these visits? Taekjoo shrugged and gave an answer Zhenya could understand.
"It's like a church or a cathedral. Sometimes people honor the souls of those who've passed, and other times they pray to God for peace of mind."
"I don't get it."
"Why not? If you had believed in God from the beginning, you wouldn't have lived the way you did. How are you going to clear that 'karma'?"
"Karma?"
"When you die and meet God or whatever, ask them to make you a 'death angel.' You can't reincarnate as a human anymore, and that suits you perfectly."
"Taekjoo, are you going to keep saying things I don't understand?"
"I told you to learn Korean, idiot."
Zhenya squinted with suspicion. Surely, it would take a long time for a foreigner to master words like 'karma' or 'reincarnation.'
"And you?"
"What about me?"
"Do you believe in God?"
"No, I don't believe either… but some people can only keep living if they do."
Kwon Taekjoo's smile faded. Meanwhile, his gaze settled on the sanctuary where his mother was praying.
"They believe that if they sincerely remember and honor those who've passed, the soul of the departed will find peace wherever it is. That belief seems to comfort the living too. But me, when I die, I'd want the people who knew me to forget I ever existed as quickly as possible."
Maybe it was because he lived closer to death than life. Even though he was breathing, he projected his feelings onto the dead more than the living. He often told Zhenya, as if it were a habit,
'What will you do without me?'
Kwon Taekjoo always had his own absence in mind.
"....…"
Zhenya's gaze pierced into Kwon Taekjoo. Just then, the wind made the branches of the trees sway in unison.
Kwon Taekjoo's hair also began to drift softly. In the next instant, Zhenya suddenly reached out and grabbed Kwon Taekjoo, who was looking away.
With a puzzled expression, Taekjoo asked why. Since it wasn't a deliberate
action, Zhenya just shook his head.
Taekjoo smiled and scolded him.
"Arrogant bastard."
Then, he removed Zhenya's hand from his arm and gently took it in his own. Pretending to be indifferent, he turned his gaze away.
Zhenya tightened his grip on Kwon Taekjoo's hand, as if afraid he would disappear if he didn't hold on tight.
.
.
.
.
End of official chapter.