The day dragged as Nara attended her assortment of lessons, most of which she found terribly boring. They didn't even bother putting the children of the warbrides through Warlord training, even though they all had the gift. There were more children from the Khanns' wives than the Khannite had Warlords anyway.
Nara's brothers were put through taccy training, the girls got a little of this but mostly they got etiquette classes, most of them were destined to be married off to cement alliances for the khannite.
When she was younger Nara made an effort to avoid this fate, studying medicine and science to hopefully one day, be noticed by the taccy medical core. Trying to become too valuable to marry off. That hope ended once the families of the first and second wives became aware of her, after that fateful ride. Since then she had kept her head down, trying to avoid being used as a pawn in the upper families games.
Esme found her as the evening drew in. "Nara! You coming?"
Nara considered for a moment just ignoring her, but it wasn't to be.
"Nara I can see you, come on, you can't stay scared of the horses forever. Come, come." Esme had latched onto her arm and was now dragging her towards the stables. Nara allowed herself to be dragged, she always had a hard time saying no to Esme.
The stables was a massive compound in and of itself. Over a thousand horses were cared for here. None were owned by the warbride children themselves, all horses belonged to the Khann, but it was their duty to ride and care for the animals. A duty that Nara had been neglecting.
Esme dragged her to a number of horses which were in need of riding. The other sibling Nara that was most familiar with had joined them, preparing the horses with saddles and rains.
It took a lot for Nara to approach the four legged beasts. She can still feel the panic as she slipped during that ride, the momentary flash of a herd of stampeding hoofs as she fell to the ground and was crushed and mangled underfoot.
Emse took her hand, she had been through all of it with Nara, she knew of her night-terrors, she had started sleeping in Nara's bed after that day. Soothing her during the early days when the nightmares had become too much.
"It's okay Nara, we can do it together, let's take it slow." Esme didn't know if getting Nara back on the horse was the best move, but it was the only idea she had, there was no room for weakness amongst the Khanns children. Nobody, not nuns, scholars or family, would teach you about how to deal with trauma.
Nara leaned into Esme and allowed her to guide her next to the horse, brushing its main with their hands. They went slowly but the two sisters eventually got the horse ready for riding and after doing a small pray song to Syn - steeling herself Nara climbed up on top.
The ride brought back memories of an earlier time, when Nara felt like she had the world at her finger tips. They started slow at first, Nara and Esme hanging back, but it didn't take long for Nara to get back into the feel of things. She doubted that the nightmares were over, but this felt like a big step, she was able to face her fears and find a little bit of the old joy of being on horseback.
They rode for an hour, the group ending up by a shallow bit of river. There was already a fire crackling next to the water on the sand. It was some of the older children from the merchant district. It was an open secret that the children of the warbrides would meet up with the children of the merchant guilds. Those in charge of arranging their futures often found it saved time and made everyone happier, if those "secret" rendezvous lead to petitions of marriage.
Nara dismounted and tied up her horse near the others, and then hand in hand Esme and her wandered towards the campfires.
There was alcohol of course. Alcohol was common, Nara herself had been drinking wine since she was a small child. It was weak, mostly just a way for everyone to be able to drink without the fear of shitting your guts out.
The night was wonderful, she and Esme danced and sang while the other played music and laughed. Esme eventually filtered off with a merchant boy that she had been talking to Nara about. Nara didn't like him, she may never had met him before, but she still didn't like him.
She kicked some rocks and wandered down the river sands a little, until she found an old log to sit on. She nursed a bottle, she hadn't had enough to be drunk, but she was feeling a slight buzz.
The black dog came and sat beside her - somehow it gave her a grin. Too tipsy to freak out, questions bubbled up inside her.
"You're not part of the black beast are you?"
"Clever girl." It said, "I am glad I chose you."
"Who are you? What are you?"
"Call me Jackal, I am a friend."
"A friend would help me get into the black beast." She stated sullenly.
Its grin widened, "As powerful and dashing and handsome as I am, that is not something I can help you with. The beast isn't mine."
"Isn't yours…" The dots connected in her brain. All the research had done on songs, to find different things to sing to the black beast. Some of those songs came back to her, old songs. Songs from the cult of the Jackal. "Wait… Jackal, as in The Jackal?"
"In the flesh... well not flesh."
"I'm going insane." Nara said, talking to herself.
"We're all going insane, it's a mad galaxy. But this is real."
"The stories I've read about you. Did you really pretend to be a goat so you could get pregnant by a mad king?"
"Everything you have read about me - I did, and worse."
Nara rubs her eyes and then took another swig. "Im talking to a god."
"Yeah, but to be fair, I'm the worst one. I barely even count. Also I was never a fan of the whole GOD label."
"Why me?"
"There is a game being played, I'm one of the players, the rules are different for each of us. I want to make you one of my pieces."
"You want me to be your pawn?"
"I want you to be my actor on the greatest stage there is."
"A pretty way of putting it." Nana said.
"It won't be fun for you. It will be hard and bloody. You could have an easy life here. One of the merchant boys there, he's a good lad, his family is on the up and up, he would treat you well. You would have many children and die old. I don't lie, this is the choice you should make. Walk back to the campfire, talk to that boy and be content."
Nara stares back out at the party and takes another drink. "I wouldn't love him."
"No, you wouldn't. But he would have enough love for both of you."
That vision of her life felt like a slow death. "What if I didn't go with you or the boy?"
"The black beast will never be yours, and if the boy doesn't petition for you, then the bureaucracy of the East Wing would grind into motion once you are of age. You would be married off. That far ahead into the future there are too many variables for even one so clever as I to see. But I do not think the option they will force on you will be better than the boy, or me. It's likely to be far worse."
"This is a lot to handle."
"You already know the answer, same as I do. It's why I chose you."
"What do you need me to do?"
"I need you to give up on your life here, the Black Beast, your siblings." It pawed around her. "Even Esme."
Nara's heart skipped a beat. "W-what do you mean?"
"She doesn't feel the same way, you know. You are a sister to her. A close one, she loves you."
"I know." Her voice quiet, tears threatening. "But not like that." She whispers.
"No." It said, like it understood.
"What happens if I follow you?" She brushed the weakness away from the eyes.
"There will be pain, a lot of it. But you will be a Knight. You will hear songs you could not imagine. And if we are very lucky, and we both play our cards right, we will find the person we both need to find."
Nara finishes off the bottle and stares out at the campfire, at Esme who is now sitting in the arms of the boy she liked. "Will she be happy?"
"I can't tell the future, but the odds are in her favor. If you follow me, and you survive, you will see her again."
"Okay."
"Yes?"
"I will follow you."
"Good, then here is what I need you to do."