Man, I never would have thought that a simple trip to the water park with family could bring so many positive emotions. Adam never had anything like this, except maybe something similar at the very beginning of his life when Cain and Abel were still just kids. And the God-killer only had his younger sister for a family, and by the time he started thinking about having one of his own... Anyway, spending time with family is pretty cool. And now, it was my turn to glance at Seth with a mysterious look, not even trying to hide my sly grin. As a result, he was constantly walking around with a thoughtful, wary expression, always expecting some kind of trick from me, and the fact that he couldn't see one just made him more and more suspicious. Bwahaha!
However, everything in moderation. After having our fun at the water park, I sent Lute back to Heaven, receiving a long, promising kiss goodbye from her. Then, I transported Azura to her and Seth's home, and went with my sons to that very D.H.O.R.K.S. base to find out what they managed to get out of those cherubs I caught in Hell.
"So, as I understand it, you've already gotten everything you could out of them?" I asked Seth as we walked down a sterile white corridor.
"Yep. As you can imagine, there was basically zero information. Just regular, run-of-the-mill grunts. Although, there is something interesting," he answered evasively.
"It took them a whole two days to find out even that much," Abaddon immediately chimed in. "And I suggested just torturing them a little. A couple of hours would have been more than enough."
"Abaddon, torture is bad," I sighed heavily, patting the guy on the head in a fatherly way. I really shouldn't have programmed that kind of shit into him. After all, I created Abaddon as the future overseer of the Abyss, and according to my design, sadistic tendencies like that would be essential there. "So, what exactly did you find out?" I asked, turning back to Seth.
"In short: all their 'police' down there in Hell are fallen cherubs. And they're actually working there, not carrying out any 'secret missions' from Eve," my middle son shared his observations. "If you want the long version, read the damn reports later! The agents entered all that crap into their database. If you need it, we'll print it out, and you can read 'til you drop."
"Easy, easy, I'll read your reports, don't be so nervous," I chuckled, calming Seth down. "Abaddon, you should 'grow up' a bit. It's not very dignified." In truth, it was a little scary to watch this seemingly small boy look at the prisoners with a kind of animalistic, predatory interest, suggesting we "torture" them... Brrr, I'd rather he be a grown, brutal man. At least then I wouldn't get any cognitive dissonance.
"Okay," a second passed, and Abaddon was a twenty-five-year-old man again. My mental health, I hope, won't suffer so much anymore. "But you should still think about the torture, so you don't have to wait so long next time."
"I'll definitely think about it," I assured my son and walked through a massive door that slid open to the side.
"Adam?" Linda turned to me, dressed in a white lab coat and black safety glasses. Apparently, while figuring out the right dosage of their "truth serum," or whatever they called it, the agents decided they were real scientists now. "Long time no see. Are you here for the reports?"
"Among other things. I also want to have a word with them, face-to-face," I nodded towards the cell with the cherubs, then walked closer and shook hands with John, who was wearing the exact same coat and glasses.
"Oh, alright. We won't disturb you then. We'll be nearby if you need anything!" Linda said hastily and immediately exited into the corridor, forcefully pushing her yelping partner in the back.
"Well then…"
"We'll sit here," Seth said immediately, sitting on a bench and pulling out his phone. "But not for long."
"Yeah, yeah, cool guy."
"Pfft."
I entered the cell and saw the following scene: three bound cherubs sat on what looked like very sturdy metal chairs, chained hand and foot by built-in metal semicircles—thick plates extending directly from the chairs themselves.
POV Seth
"Why do people pay to watch idiots making faces on their phones?" the kid suddenly asked, looking curiously at my phone.
"Uh, people mostly kill time that way," I answered, hesitating a little. To be honest, I didn't really get it either. Thousands of people die of hunger every day, while others spend tens of thousands of bucks on some idiots from TikTok, or on those OnlyFans girls… yeah.
"Kill time?" Abaddon's eyes widened instantly. "How… how can you kill time itself? And in such a strange way?"
"Not literally," I sighed heavily. Sometimes I feel like he's just messing with me. "'Killing time' means wasting it on something pointless. Basically, just having fun," I explained, continuing to stare at my phone. I wonder what Dad is even talking to those traitors about right now.
"Wait. So, 'killing time' is wasting it senselessly? What about 'killing space' then? What's that like?"
"Ahem…" And it's like this all the time! Abaddon has absolutely no understanding of such seemingly simple things, and then I have to sit and figure out how to explain all these terms to him without letting something slip. I remember on the very first day, I swore in front of him, and then I spent a whole week breaking the kid of the habit of constantly saying the word "bitch." "People don't usually say that. But, in general, it also means to waste senselessly, but space instead of time. For example: you have a small room, and you fill it with a bunch of useless, empty boxes. By doing so, you are senselessly wasting the space in that room."
"But why is 'killing' associated with something meaningless?" Abaddon persisted.
"Because it's a metaphor," I began slowly, carefully choosing my words. "You can't actually kill time. It passes on its own, regardless of you. People just like to add more drama to their words to make everything seem more serious. And the word 'kill' itself sounds pretty dramatic," I shrugged, turning off my phone and putting it back in my pocket.
"Hmm, people have strange habits," Abaddon frowned, clearly lost in thought. "They take a word that means the end of someone's life and apply it to things that continue to exist."
"Exactly," I nodded. "It's a figure of speech. To make it clearer and add more emotion."
"But that distorts the very meaning of the word!" my brother wouldn't let it go. "If 'killing' doesn't mean killing, then what does 'to kill' actually mean?"
"Uh…" I scratched the back of my head, desperately trying to come up with some coherent answer. "Well… to really kill someone is to take their life, and everything else is a figurative meaning. Like when people say 'this job is killing me'—no one is actually hitting themselves in the head with a hammer."
"But if the meaning can be stretched anywhere, it loses its clarity…" Abaddon's eyes narrowed slyly for a second. "Maybe that's why people misunderstand each other so often?"
"...You've got to be… ahem, kid," I sighed again. "I think you just explained the entire essence of human communication to me. I hate misunderstandings…"
POV Adam
"So, gentlemen… and a lady…" Even before entering the room, I put on a slightly crazy, predatory grin. Let them be a little scared. It's good for them. "Mind answering a couple of my questions?" I walked inside and heard the heavy, steel door automatically close behind me.
"Mmf-mphf!" one of the cherubs, a she-wolf, immediately tried to say something, but their mouths were covered with tight leather gags, so furious mumbling was all I heard. I pulled the gag down to the mumbling cherub's neck and looked at her expectantly.
"Ahem, thanks…"
"You were so eager to say something to me just to thank me?" I raised an eyebrow skeptically, looking at the she-wolf with light irony.
"Uh, yes?"
"And not because you just wanted to look cool in front of your buddies?" I specified, noticing with a smirk how her face immediately turned red.
"Uh, no?"
"Well then, I believe you!" I nodded with an important look. You couldn't tell just by looking at her that she was pumped full of Darkness to the brim. All this time, I wasn't just messing with the fallen cherub; I was carefully probing her with my senses. My current level was more than enough for a detailed examination, but unfortunately, it took quite a lot of time. "So, would you care to tell me why exactly you sold your asses to Eve?"
"You're the ones who kicked us out!" all her former playfulness vanished instantly, and a look of genuine resentment and anger appeared on the cherub's face. Judging by the furrowed brows of her companions, they were in complete solidarity with the she-wolf. "We tried so hard, and you just threw us out! For such a minor transgression, you banished us from Heaven!"
"Let's start with the simple stuff: you do know who exactly banished you, don't you?" I decided to drop the jokes. It seemed the situation here was a little different from what I had imagined.
"Deerie," the she-wolf spat out the doe's name with hatred, almost hissing. The other two cherubs immediately nodded in agreement.
"Deerie, that's right," I clapped my hands. "The same Deerie who has been serving Eve for almost a hundred years, who accepted the Fruit of Knowledge from her, and who, at every opportunity, grows the army of my dearest ex-wife…"
"..." A heavy silence hung in the room. "Deerie… no… but why did you let it happen? If that's true, why did you let her just throw us out to Earth? Why?.." The she-wolf was visibly shaken. The more I look at this so-called "army of Eve," the more I resent that damn doe for so easily breaking the lives of what were, essentially, still just kids.
"Listen," I interrupted her stream of words, noticing a tear slowly rolling down the she-wolf's cheek. "We only found out about Deerie's activities very recently. She skillfully hid all the cherub disappearances in her reports, concealed the truth, and in doing so, hid from us for almost a whole century. When we finally realized what had been happening right under our noses, we tried to fix everything—to bring back all those whom that traitor had banished. But unfortunately, you were no longer on Earth. That's why we started looking for you in both Hell and Heaven. As you can see, we finally found you," I could have told her the truth, of course, but… who would enjoy hearing that your own parents simply accepted your disappearance as a given? Raphael did try to find the cherubs after he learned the truth, but none of them even considered digging through Hell—it was just too dangerous. "And now, I'm going to fix everything," I promised her, then stretched my hand out towards them, and the whole room was instantly filled with a bright, blinding Light. The cherubs immediately started mumbling, and the she-wolf began to howl, squeezing her eyes shut. It didn't last long, no more than ten seconds. But I'm sure they'll remember it for a long time. Two-thirds of my reserves, gone just like that.
"Huh?" When the light finally faded, the she-wolf opened her eyes and looked around in surprise. "We're… we're alive?" And that question finally made me trust them completely. Cherubs usually worked in threes—two guys and one girl. This was for some of their own special tricks, invented by Gabriel. Supposedly, girls trusted other girls more easily, and the two guys served as both muscle and support. In short, that's just how they did things, and so, cherub trios were usually very close. Now, when she said "we" instead of "I," I could say with confidence that they were still the same cute little cherubs who just wanted to help, but were cruelly deceived and used. I hope I wasn't mistaken.
"Alive, of course. I just cleansed you of the Darkness. And…" I paused for a moment, trying to phrase my offer more elegantly. "Heaven is ready to give you a second chance. But are you… ready to give Heaven a second chance?" In an instant, all the shackles binding the cherubs vanished, as did their gags. And I extended my hand to the she-wolf.
"..." The girl looked at me silently. Her eyes held a mixture of surprise, shock, and lingering resentment. The two cherubs sitting to her right and left immediately placed their hands on her shoulders, as if to say, "make the decision, we're with you." And then, the she-wolf, sighing heavily, closed her eyes and finally shook my hand.
"Thank you. I appreciate it," I smiled and winked at the cherubs. "Before you return to Heaven, I'd like to introduce you to someone. Other cherubs, also banished by Deerie. Her last victims, thanks to whom we found out about all her dealings. They… are in need of correction. If you don't mind, could you help them?"
"Help?" the she-wolf immediately perked up. "Yes! We… we would be very happy to help them…"
"Well then, please follow me," paying no attention to the cherubs exchanging glances, I walked to the door, which opened on its own, and stepped outside.
"Father?" Seth looked at me with unconcealed surprise. "You… cleansed them?"
"Yep. And our new friends would like to help your charges. How are they doing, by the way?"
"Um… I think it's better if you see for yourself…" Seth sighed heavily, slowly getting up from the bench.
"They're not doing great," Abaddon explained, also getting up and heading for the exit.
"I see…" I glanced at the still-silent cherubs, then motioned for them to head out, and we all started making our way out of the building.
Outside, we were met by those same three losers. And we were "lucky" enough to catch them right in the middle of their "hard work"… Some old grandma seemed to want to cross the street, and our "friends" were trying to help her do it…
"Go! You have to run! The green light is only on for fifteen seconds, you have to run out ahead of time!" the yellow sheep was yelling at the poor old woman.
"No, wait! What if a driver hits you?! You should try to wait for the next green light! And if it runs out in the middle of the road, at least the drivers will see you and definitely won't hit you!" the purple lamb was quietly dissuading her.
"JUST DO SOMETHING ALREADY! WE'VE BEEN AT THIS FOR FIFTEEN MINUTES!" the baby cherub finally snapped. And the grandma, listening to him, immediately stepped onto the road, but tripped on the curb and… fell. And a huge black SUV driving down the road simply ran her over, generously splattering the whole company of loser cherubs with blood. "FUCK YEAH!"
"Oh…" the purple lamb turned towards us. It was hard not to notice such a colorful group. Especially when said group's eyes were currently popping out of their sockets.
"This is what I was talking about…" Seth covered his face with his hand.
"Fucking hell…" I rubbed my eyes hard, exhaling… Well, at least that grandma is in Heaven now. For some reason, I was absolutely sure of it. Now she'll be an eternally young, happy beauty, in a perfect, flawless world… No, I'm not trying to console myself right now, it's just… just because.
"Fucking hell?" Abaddon asked with curiosity.
"Abaddon, don't repeat that. It's… it's a bad word," Seth immediately stopped him, trying to pretend that none of what just happened actually happened, and that those blood-soaked, awkwardly smiling cherubs were just an illusion.
"But how can a word be bad?" Abaddon asked Seth with genuine interest. Hmm, I thought I had instilled that kind of knowledge in him… No, I definitely did. Then why is he asking? I looked at my son and saw a sly, mischievous glint in his eyes. I see, another prankster in the family…
"Anyway," I turned to the she-wolf and her friends. "As you can see for yourselves, your help is indispensable here. Share your experience with them, train them up, you know… I'm counting on you," after receiving uncertain nods in response, I turned to Seth. "You're in charge. If anything, stay in touch," after which I instantly teleported home, so I wouldn't have to participate in this circus anymore.
"You're finally home," a languid, alluring voice came from the couch. "And I have a special reward for you…"
She was lying on the couch, in nothing but lace lingerie, and just one look at her was enough for all my fatigue to vanish instantly. I walked over to her, and our lips immediately met in a long, passionate kiss. Clothes suddenly started to feel like an obstacle… and right in the middle of it, as I was already undoing the clasp on her bra, the doorbell rang.
"Fuck!" I cursed. Growling in annoyance, I, half-naked in just my shorts, trudged to the door and yanked it open.
On the doorstep, holding some kind of folder, stood Emily. Her eyes immediately widened in surprise, and her face instantly turned crimson when she saw me like that.
"A… A-a-adam… I… I think I came at a bad time?"