The Sloth Ring greeted me with the same pacifying, yet slightly depressing picture as last time: soft pink-purple tones of the sky, eternal twilight, and an abundance of sanatoriums, hospitals, and pharmacies per square meter. Demons drifted smoothly along the streets, showing with their entire appearance that they had absolutely nowhere to hurry. Even the air here felt thick and sleepy, evoking a desire to lie right down on the sidewalk and take a nap for a couple of hours. Not literally, mind you, just the feeling.
In general, my journey through Hell in the form of Baal had another, slightly hidden meaning. Besides paying my respects to the Sins in person, I was also demonstrating to Eve (who, I'd bet my teeth, is watching my every move) and who knows that Baal is my disguise, that the Sins are on my side. It was a signal: "Don't even try to recruit them, they're already mine."
I didn't want to spend a lot of time here—I had already killed a ton of hours with Satan, Mammon, and Beelzebub anyway—so I headed straight to the local big boss's habitat: her high-rise. I flew up to the already familiar balcony, except this time I didn't break in brazenly, but politely knocked on the glass...
Silence.
Knocked a second time, more persistently...
Silence again.
Activating my magical sensory perception, I detected a strong Dark aura on the bed inside.
Knocked one more time...
Zero reaction.
Basically, holding back a nervous tic, I picked the lock with telekinesis like a seasoned cat burglar, climbed into the room, and found Belphegor sleeping sweetly on a huge bed piled high with pillows. The Sin of Sloth was true to herself—she was sleeping surrounded by empty medicine packages and plush toys, wrapped in a blanket so that only her nose stuck out.
"Ahem, ahem..." I cough loudly into my fist, trying to draw the girl's attention to my presence here.
Yes, I understand that it is, to put it mildly, not nice to break into people's (and demons') houses while they're sleeping and wake them up to force them to participate in a war, but I didn't have time for etiquette.
"M-m?" the sleepy girl interrupted my thoughts, lazily opening one eye. Opening the second one was apparently too energy-consuming.
"Hey, Belphegor, I..." I start, but I'm cut off.
"Adam..." she nods and immediately closes her eye again. Wait. I was in Baal's form and hadn't dropped it. Recalling our first meeting, I can only assume she has some kind of extremely sensitive magical "friend-or-foe" sensory system set up here. Which, by the way, makes fucking perfect sense for a paranoid who sleeps all the time, but it only just dawned on me now. "Sis Bee called me..." the demoness reported, yawning so wide she almost dislocated her jaw. She rolled over onto her other side, her back to me. "I agree. I'll give it my all... ah-h..." another massive yawn. "If that's all, I'm going to sleep... And close the window, there's a draft..."
And a second later, measured sniffling was heard.
O-o-okay...
Shrugging my shoulders, I climb back outside, carefully close the window behind me (I'm not a villain to freeze the girl), and, checking the map, create a portal to the Lust Ring.
Yeah, that's definitely not the attitude I expected from one of the Deadly Sins. And yeah, I get that the Concepts they chose influence their personalities, but not to this extent! Although, thinking about it, what did I expect from Sloth?
Well anyway, back to business, or rather, to the last one on the list, but not the least (probably)—Asmodeus, the Sin of Lust.
The Lust Ring greeted me... It just greeted me. If anyone thinks it's just a red-light district, they are gravely mistaken. It was an endless, pulsating metropolis of eternal night, bathed in the neon light of all shades of pink, purple, and deep blue. The air here was thick, humid, and smelled of a mix of expensive perfumes, pheromones, ozone, and something sweet and musky.
The Lust Ring actually wasn't much different from what I saw in Pentagram City, specifically in the "Three Vs" district—a bunch of restaurants, brothels, and various little shops of different orientations (mostly sex-related, of course).
Demons of all stripes crowded the streets—incubi, succubi, imps, and other native inhabitants. And they were all... beautiful.
A cult of the body reigned here. Crowds of half-naked men and women in latex, silk, and leather strolled along the avenues, flirted, kissed, but... didn't cross the line. Sex on the streets was under strict prohibition by Asmodeus himself.
"Want love? Get a room. The streets are for foreplay," read one of Ozzy's "laws." Well, at least he's doing something right, and thank God for that; believe me, I definitely wouldn't want to watch public demon orgies.
Asmodeus's home towered over all this neon splendor. It was a massive skyscraper in the shape of a stylized letter "A", with a giant flaming heart spinning at its peak. The Sin of Lust lived in the most luxurious penthouse at the very top.
As I mentioned before, I'm not placing any special bets on him, because not only is he frankly quite weak in a direct fight compared to Bee or Satan, but there's also that shady contract he signed with Eve, the details of which this idiot can't disclose...
Deciding not to waste time on elevators and security, I simply flew up to the wide panoramic balcony of his penthouse. And that was my mistake.
Through the clear glass, I got a view of a massive living room bathed in dim red light. And Asmodeus was there, only not alone, but with his robotic "buddy" Fizzarolli. And they were, let's just say, by no means drinking tea with bagels or solving crossword puzzles...
"Fuck!" I turned away sharply, feeling the heat rush to my face and my eye start to twitch in a nervous tic. "Why right now of all times?!"
Bursting in there and interrupting the... process... would be the height of idiocy and probably the most awkward moment of my life. So, quickly conjuring a piece of paper and a pen with magic, I scribbled a note:
"Ozzy, I was here. The deal is on. Wait for the signal. And buy thicker curtains. Adam."
Wedging the note between the sashes of the balcony door, I teleported out of there much faster than usual.
Home. Sweet home.
I collapsed onto the sofa in our living room, leaning back and closing my eyes. After the acid colors of Lust, the calm white and gold tones of my home felt like balm for the soul.
"Phew..." I exhale noisily, feeling the tension let go of my muscles.
"You're home already?" a familiar white crown of hair with a black halo popped out of the kitchen.
"Uh-huh..." I answer, involuntarily yawning myself. Physically, I didn't feel tired, but mentally, I felt like I had been unloading bricks for three shifts straight.
Lute walked out of the kitchen, wiping her hands with a towel. She wasn't wearing her usual Exorcist armor, just my white t-shirt, and it made her look so... cozy, I guess?
"So how did it go?" she asked, walking closer and looking me over carefully.
"Pretty good, I think. Almost too smoothly, if you think about it..."
"You think Eve is plotting something?"
"She's always plotting something, that snake, but the Sins seem to be on our side now. Mammon bought into the gold, Leviathan into logic, Satan into the chance to fight and stay 'Second to Lucifer'... Basically, a full house."
"Ha, I was just about to say that!" The girl, radiating happiness, finally leaned over and placed a steaming mug of herbal tea on the table in front of me. She's a saint. Just a saint. "I'm making a pie," she explained, noticing my questioning look. "Meat pie. I know you don't really like meat ones, but someone shared a recipe with me that is simply finger-licking good..."
I looked at my beloved, listened to her excited, joyful chirping about recipes and some nonsense, and felt a warm wave of tenderness mixed with cold determination rise inside me.
I will absolutely not let Eve take her away from me. I will absolutely not let her destroy this coziness, this little world we've built. Those hallucinations I saw when absorbing the Fruit of Knowledge, where I lose her... they will never become reality. I will lay my bones down, burn my soul, destroy the entire world, but this damn story will have a happy ending.
"Tomorrow is the Extermination..." I gently interrupt Lute, taking her hand in mine and kissing her palm. "I hope everything is ready for... possible troubles?"
"Yes," Lute instantly lost all her domestic, "plush" charm. Her gaze sharpened, her back straightened—the Exorcist Commander was standing before me once again. "All legions have been put on full combat alert. Weapons and armor have been checked and are working perfectly. Saraqael finished building 'L.O.C.K.'. Even though its operating principle is very different from what was originally intended, it now has a two-stage containment system..."
"Well, well, my golden-eyed beauty, I see you actually delved into the technical details too?" I smile, admiring how she switches between "nagging wife" and "loyal general" modes.
"Hey, I always thoroughly study everything I'm involved in!" the girl declares indignantly, plopping down onto my lap with a swing and wrapping her arms around my neck. "You can't lead an army into battle without knowing how your main weapon works."
"I know, my sunshine, I know," I pull Lute close, burying my nose in her hair, which smelled of vanilla and some kind of berries. New shampoo? "Don't be mad, I'm just joking..."
"Watch me get mad!" my valkyrie declared, tilting her chin up and offering her neck for kisses. "So get ready—you'll be working this off now. Today, you're the pony!"
"Ha, alright, I'm never against experiments, my 'rider'..."
Several hours later, the forge-home of Seraphim Saraqael.
Organized chaos reigned here. Scrolls with blueprints flew in the air mixed with pieces of angelic steel, glowing crystals of unknown origin (I assume they're batteries), and tools.
"And now, dummy it down for me..." I pleaded.
For about five minutes now, my dear friend and genius blacksmith had been explaining not just the principle of his invention's operation, but tightly packing my poor brain with the history of its creation, multiplied by the fundamental laws of the universe and some drugged-up technomagical nonsense underlying the "L.O.C.K."...
And don't get me wrong, I'm not against enlightenment, but... Not right now! I only started barely understanding the local magic system, God willing, maybe two or three months ago, and now he's dumping some kind of quantum mechanics on me! And I know it's not out of malice, he just gets carried away.
"Ahem, sorry, I got carried away..." Saraqael agreed, coughing into his fist, pushing up his glasses and clearly embarrassed by his own intensity. "In simple terms: the first level will drag you and Eve into an isolated subspace. It's a 'pocket dimension' that will completely cut you off from the three worlds. It will allow you to fight at full power without fear of destroying Heaven or Hell. It's important to note here that 'L.O.C.K.' shouldn't be used at the beginning of the battle, but only after the 'cleansing' of the fallen cherubs, which, according to my calculations, will take you anywhere from five to ten minutes."
"Uh-huh," I nod, trying to look smart.
"After the 'cleansing', you activate the second phase. You use 'L.O.C.K.', tuned to Eve's unique Darkness frequency, find yourself one-on-one with her, defeat her, and after that, according to our calculations, the Root of Evil itself should manifest, displeased with the defeat of its chosen one. However, thanks to 'L.O.C.K.', Ruu will manifest not in the material world, but in this exact isolated space. And there, she will be bound by the combined power of all the Seraphim, channeled through your 'Sun'. We convert all the cherubs, kill all the unknown shit from the Darkness, and live happily ever after. Is that clear now?"
"Explaining the plan to me all over again isn't entirely logical since I participated in putting it together, but yeah—that makes it clearer," I agree, unable to resist jabbing my buddy for blowing my mind.
"Rude..." Saraqael feigns an offended look, then sighs heavily and takes off his glasses, wiping them with the edge of his robe. "Adam, are you... Are you sure it's worth taking such a risk? If we entrust the battle with Eve to Michael, then..."
"Then he will die," I cut my friend off sharply, stripping all the cheerfulness from my voice. "Eve is currently stronger than the Seraphim. Michael is very strong, he's a Warrior with a capital W, but he's no match for her."
"You can't know that for sure," the Seraphim persisted.
"But the chance of his death is higher than mine. I cannot allow casualties. Even though I understand they are unavoidable in war, I have no intention of sending my comrades to certain death knowing this. That is my responsibility and my past."
"Hah... You know..." the Seraphim suddenly started quietly, slumping exhaustedly into a chair. "You've always been like this. Now... Now you've changed a lot, become wiser, more cunning, but... you still remain yourself. The same Adam..."
"A very... strange statement," I frown. What exactly is he hinting at?
"I've never been big on sentimentality, it's just..." he looked up at me. "Don't go getting yourself killed out there, alright? It'll be hard for us without such a reckless Commander-in-Chief and... it'll be hard for me without such a friend."
"Hah..." I step closer and squeeze the Seraphim's shoulder tightly. It's nice. It's fucking nice to live and work not just for yourself and your own selfish desires, like revenge... I can certainly compare. "Don't worry, old friend. I love life too much to just die so easily. After the battle, we'll drink to a glorious victory!"
"You sound like some kind of viking..." Saraqael snorts, but smiles. "But I'm not opposed to it."
"Then it's a bet," I wink at my comrade. "I have a couple of buddies who will be participating in the battle and would be glad to drink with us after..."
Several hours later, the main training grounds of the Exorcists.
The air here rang with tension and the sound of steel. Thousands, tens of thousands of black-winged warriors who had come out of "retirement" were practicing maneuvers. It was an simultaneously mesmerizing and terrifying sight.
Squadrons circled in the sky, practicing synchronized dive-bombing; on the ground, groups of twenty girls hacked at each other with spears and swords, sparing no effort. Lute, Hera, and Jeanne darted between the squads, barking commands, correcting stances, and occasionally yelling so loud it made even my ears pop.
"Hold the line! Do not break distance! If the Darkness touches you—chop off the tentacles, armor won't help against prolonged contact!" Lute's voice boomed.
I watched this from an elevation, feeling proud. And it would have continued like this, if not for the appearance of a small, glowing ball of positivity that blew my mind with a single sentence...
"What do you mean 'I want to join the Exorcists'?" Slightly stunned by the assertiveness, I ask again, looking at a highly determined Emily.
She had landed right in front of me, folding her six wings, but she looked as if she were ready to storm Hell single-handedly.
"I want to join the ranks of the Exorcists and defend Heaven from the impending invasion of the forces of Darkness!" the junior Seraphim declared categorically.
"Emily, my dear..." I start from afar, constructing the softest but firmest rejection possible in my head. "War isn't some joke. The girls... And the boys..." I nod at Saint George, who was drilling the recruits. "...can fight only thanks to training and the 'weakness' of the Light within them. It's different with Seraphim. Upon direct contact with Darkness, it can drive you insane, consume you, turn you into monsters..."
"I know," the girl nodded seriously, clenching her small fists. "But I still want to protect Heaven! Uncle Micha... Ahem, Michael mastered Cleansing, and I asked him to help me with it..."
"I understand, but mastering the first Concept takes a Seraphim no less than a dozen years, and..." I started my lecture, but choked on air.
Emily stretched out her hand, and a blindingly white flame danced on her palm. The purest, concentrated Concept of Cleansing.
"That's... how is that?" I asked dumbly.
"I managed it in a couple of days..." Emily awkwardly looked away, slightly embarrassed by my reaction. "Michael was surprised too. That's why I want to help!"
Alright, this changes... well, not everything, but a lot. Concepts that allow one to defend against the influence of Darkness are very rare. The fact that we have a genius capable of mastering this in days was impressive, but on the other hand...
"Combat experience, Emily. You have exactly zero," I shook my head. "I understand and respect your willingness, as well as your talent, but I cannot let you risk your life right now. You are the future of Heaven."
"And when did you first risk your life?" she suddenly asked, looking me straight in the eye. "I read about your past, Adam. I know that at my age, you had the weight of all humanity on your shoulders. You were the First King of Men. I understand that I am inexperienced in war, everyone has already pointed that out to me, but I was born a Seraphim! I am endowed with great power and great responsibility! I can't just stand aside and calmly watch while my friends die for my home!"
It was hard to argue with that. Emily really could become a powerful trump card, saving hundreds of lives just by being present.
But... Damn it, I'll even admit it to myself—I don't want kids fighting to the death! I am a warrior. My girls are warriors who have been through the War. We are ready to kill and die. But Emily?
"No..." I started.
"Adam, I won't rush to the vanguard," she interrupted, changing tactics. "I will just help to the best of my abilities. Cover others with shields, heal, cleanse the Darkness if necessary. I will be in the rear. Please. Give me a chance to be useful."
And then this miracle pulled out such a cute Puss in Boots face from Shrek, her huge eyes full of tears and hope, that my prepared refusal got stuck somewhere around my Adam's apple.
If she'll be doing support... If her presence saves the life of even one of my girls... Do I have the right to refuse because of my own sentimentality?
"Fine," I sigh heavily, giving in.
Out of the corner of my eye, I notice Lute, Hera, and Jeanne pausing their training to stand nearby, giving this little ball of fluff a thumbs up. Oh, you traitors! So they decided this behind my back? Conspired beforehand? Alright, well now I know who's getting extra kitchen duty...
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!" Emily jumped in place happily, clapping her hands, and then ran up and hugged me, burying her nose in my chest. "Oops..." blushing like a poppy, she immediately let me go and jumped a step back. "Sorry, Adam. Emotions."
"Excuse me," I correct her sternly, but my lips break into a smirk on their own. "You're under my command now, Private." I wink at the girl. "Lute! Jeanne! Get over here!"
"Yes, sir?" The girls practically teleported over in a second, putting on innocent faces.
"You dumped her on me—you deal with her. You're her 'godmothers' now. Tomorrow is the Extermination, so get Emily prepped today. I want her to know the basics—formations, commands, retreats—by heart. Is that clear?"
"Yes, sir!" they nodded synchronously, holding back smiles.
"Saint George!" now my gaze is directed at my mustachioed comrade. "And you—are answering for our newbie's life with your own head. If a single feather drops from her, I'll turn your mustache into a broom. Am I making myself clear?"
"Yes, sir, Your Grace!" this... bastard thumped his spear on the ground. He's grinning under his mustache too.
"Clowns..." I whisper, but my soul feels warmer. The team is assembled.
I turned to the rest of Heaven's warriors, ready to give their lives for their home tomorrow.
"PREPARE YOURSELVES!" I shout, amplifying my voice with magic so that it rolled over the training ground like thunder. "TOMORROW WILL NOT BE JUST AN EXTERMINATION. TOMORROW WILL BE THE DECISIVE BATTLE. THE BATTLE FOR HEAVEN! AND WE WILL WIN!"
Thousands of spears struck shields in a single impulse, answering me with a roar that made Heaven tremble...