Being Jin Yang's friend and girlfriend didn't differ much, which was relieving for Ga Eun. She knew that for her sake, he was taking everything slowly. He's following her pace. True, he waited for her every morning in front of the gate of the Lee family's house, and later walked her back from school. But so far, he never forced anything. They hadn't even held hands yet.
The only change was that Jin Yang finally allowed himself to let his guard down and looked at her to his heart's content. Previously, he was afraid she would catch him looking dazed or even worse, blushing. But now, he felt at least he got the right to do that.
There's something in the way he looked at her that made Ga Eun smiled. She was only human. Nobody hated to be admired upon. His look was so filled with affection that she couldn't help to smile at him, to really listen to him every time he spoke, or soften her tone when she addressed him.
To be on the different end of adoration felt wonderful. She realized that maybe she looked like that at Myung Hwan, all the time, or didn't she?
True, she missed Myung Hwan everyday. But her heart, which had undergone a lot of pain, surrendered easily to the flow of Jin Young's admiration. After several weeks, she realized she was happy. Happier than she had been for a long time. She promised to make Jin Yang happy too, to the best of her ability.
Whispers and callings of Myung Hwan's name still often sneaked into her heart. But she had no other choice besides trying to calm herself and to try to open his heart for Jin Yang. Maybe, this was for the best.
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Ga Eun loved to cook. She knew she was not as good as the chefs in the house, but she enjoyed the process of shopping for the ingredients, preparing and cutting it, the cooking itself, and finally eating the food. Preferably with someone to share it with. Often, it was with the maids or servants of the house. They were all like a family by now. Or with Ki Jun. And just recently, with Jin Yang.
There's something meaningful in cooking a meal for someone. And sharing it together with them. It felt intimate. It felt comfortable. It felt real.
She tried making dumplings and brought a lot for Jin Yang that day, and they both ate it at lunch, sitting in the garden of the school, where there were a lot of stone tables and benches.
"Have you seen Ki Jun today?" she asked, wiping her mouth with a tissue.
"Hm....no. Haven't seen him since yesterday."
"Me too. I haven't seen him for three days. I texted him, but he's not replying any of it."
"You're worried, aren't you?" he asked carefully, seeing her frowning.
She sighed, "Yes, very much. He's having a hard time. I just need to know that he's alright."
"I hope everything will be okay for him. I know his parents and especially his abeoji actually mean a lot to him. It must be hard for him to do this."
"Ne. But he really wants to do this, you know? Design school. I also can't see his future any other way than that."
Jin Yang nodded, and they both got lost in their thoughts for their friend.
"What will you do if you're in his position?" she suddenly asked.
"Huh?"
"You. If you had to choose between what you want and your parents, which one would you choose?"
Jin Yang smiled. "I'm not the kind of guy who'll disobey his parents. Whatever I'll do. There is never any occasion to test it, but I think if that happens, I'll choose to give up my dream and do what my parents want."
Ga Eun looked at Jin Yang unblinkingly, tilting her head as she absorbed this new revelation of him.
"My parents had me late. They are more than fifty years old now. They have always given me what I want. I can't see myself hurting them in any way. It's just not possible."
"Really?"
"Ne."
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Jin Yang shrugged and chuckled. "I'm completely ordinary. All I want to do is just to work in a good company, earn the money every month, and be with my family on the weekends. Because that's what my Dad does and I see he's happy with it."
She was glad that he didn't ask what she wanted to be when she grew up.
If Ki Jun heard it, he'd be furious.
But this was not about herself.
"What about music? You don't want to try earning a living with it?" Ga Eun asked.
"Music? Music is just....a hobby. Something I love doing in my spare time. I have no intention to be a musician or an artist.
She nodded.
"You're a good son. Appa would have loved to know you."
"Mwo?"
"My Appa, if he's still alive, he would've loved to know you."
That somehow made him beamed. "That's nice to hear."
"Ne," she responded, taking her meal boxes and putting them in her lunch bag.
"The dumplings are good. Too bad Ki Jun's not here to taste it."
"Yes. I wonder what's happening to him? I think he's not coming to school today" she wondered, knowing nobody would know the answer. "It's okay. I'll drop by his house sometime soon."
"Tell me if you see him. I hope he's okay," he requested.
"Okay," and with that, they walked together to their classes.
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With the preparations and upcoming tests to graduate high school and their wish to enroll in Yeungjin university, Jin Yang and G Eun were busy. Extra lessons after school and finishing lunch quickly to then hasten to the library and study were permanent within their days, together.
But in that particular week, Ga Eun rarely saw Ki Jun. He attended school, but came before classes started and left without finding her just after the bells rang.
Worry ate her inside, because he's not answering any of her calls or texts. She intended to stop by his house, but lately the extra classes ended in the evening. The only time she had was to run home, freshen up, and be ready to welcome the Lee family for dinner.
But when you needed someone, you couldn't deny the wish for her support, no matter how hard you try to keep her away from your troubles.
So finally it was Ki Jun who came to Ga Eun, one evening when he felt his existence was a mere nuisance to the world. He could not even think straight. His feet carried him to the Lee family house. The security guards willingly opened the gates for him, fully aware of his friendship with Ga Eun.
When she received the intercom call that K Jun was waiting for her at the main front door, she ran as fast as she could. The second she saw him, she knew something bad had happened.
It's raining so hard outside, full of thunder and harsh wind. His body was soaking wet and shaking, drops of water dripped to the marble floor. But she thought that his face was wet not only because of the rain, but also from tears. He was clearly suffering and he looked so lost, shaking from the cold.
"What's wrong? What happened, Ki Junnie?"
"Abeoji," he muttered, hugging his own body in an attempt to seek warmth. "Had a fight. He wanted me to go into cram school and work out some way to get into university. Studying business. It got ugly. And he.....uh...sent me out of the house."
She could see the bruise and the little cut on his left forehead.
"Oh my God..."
"Can I.....stay here for the night Ga Eun-ah?" he begged, his lips were trembling and his words shook.
He looked so lost and in pain that she wanted to cry. She had never seen him cry. It's her who usually cried on his shoulder. The reversal of their roles was overwhelming. She was sure Sajangnim and Samonim wouldn't mind her helping him, giving him a roof when he needed it.
She closed her hand on his wrist, "Of course. Come inside. You're shaking."
"Ga Eun?"
"Ne?"
"I don't think I can come back to my house anymore."
She could not hold her tears anymore and hugged him.
"I'm—I'm wet—your—your clothes will get dirty and you'll g—get sick."
"Paboo. You're the one who will get sick. Stop thinking about me for a while and think about yourself."
She could feel his arms hugging her back, as if wanting to gain some strength from her.
"Ga Eun..."
"Ne?"
"I feel sorry for everything I said to Abeoji....I really am sorry, Ga Eun-ah."
She sobbed. Because his pain was her pain.
"I know, Ki Junnie.....I know...."
"But I really can't throw what I want. I really, really want to do this."
"I know."
"Ottoke, Ga Eun-ah, ottoke?"
She hugged him tight, and rubbed his back as if he was a child. Like all the many times he helped her survive, she would save him this time. He was obviously shaken because of his fight with his father. She knew his father was important to him. He wouldn't tell the details but she sensed that they must have had a really bad fight to make him this affected.
"For now, you have to get inside and dry yourself. Eat something. Sleep. And tomorrow, go to school as usual."
"I w—won't disturb you long, I promise. I'll look for a job and rent a room somewhere...."
"Cut those thoughts out for now on. Don't think about it all now. Come. I'll take you to one of the empty servant's rooms. Is that okay for you?"
"More than okay."
"Good. Let's not waste anymore time. Or you'll be feverish soon."
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