"Meow~ Don't you think your story is a bit too simplistic?"
Raj asked, his throat dry from his relentless "offensive."
Seeing that Jiraiya was no longer angry, he paused his torrent of words and posed the question.
Jiraiya pondered for a long moment before replying, "Then why don't I give you the pen and you write it?"
"Meow?"
'Did I just get outsmarted?'
"You seem to have a whole series of ideas. Why don't you write it yourself? You're just a cat - where do you get all these thoughts?"
"It's precisely because humans don't understand cats' thoughts that we have so many ideas, meow..." Raj explained again.
One lie often requires countless others to conceal it.
Truly a profound insight.
"The story is decent, this sage will adopt it. However, I think changing the wild dog to a black stray cat would be better," Jiraiya commented, presenting his "superior" revised version.
To this, Raj could only think, 'Whatever makes you happy.'
'It's just a story to fool you anyway.'
'Come to think of it, could this be considered bringing "new literature" to the Ninja World?'
Just imagine Kakashi and Minato holding novels like this in the future - the image was almost too beautiful to bear.
But to think that the inspiration for the very first book in this series came from a cat...
If this news ever got out, it would probably earn him another massive wave of Points!
"Meow~ I want my name added, and it has to say 'A Cat.'"
"Absolutely not! If I add your name, what would I be? I'll credit you as the inspiration provider, but no mention of your identity."
Jiraiya immediately began haggling.
Even though Raj was the source of the story, adding his name would already be embarrassing enough.
If they specified he was a cat, what face would Jiraiya have left, even if the book sold like crazy?
But then again, if it sold well, wouldn't everyone in the village know a cat had given him the idea?
He quickly added a compromise: "You can only be credited as an assistant!"
"Meow~ Fine, fine. Assistant works too, but the money can't be less."
Raj didn't push further.
Who knew if Jiraiya might get angry and dunk him in water again or send him to Orochimaru?
"Alright, let's start writing now..."
"Lord Jiraiya, Raj... uh, you two?"
An untimely voice interrupted them.
Jiraiya immediately thought, 'This is bad.'
It was a patrol ninja from the camp, likely alerted by the Chakra fluctuations from his Wild Lion's Mane Technique.
'Someone's found me... Wait a minute, I'm not writing anything artistic! What am I worried about? At worst, I'm just slacking off during work hours. But I'm the camp leader! Hmm, no need to fear. Jiraiya, you're righteous.'
After a quick pep talk, his expression relaxed.
He said calmly, "Don't worry, Raj and I have some matters to discuss. You can get back to your duties."
Raj watched from the sidelines, his heart filled with mixed emotions.
'Konoha really lacks innovation! The master and apprentice used the same dismissive line: "Busy yourself," which really meant, "You're in the way. Leave already." Couldn't they come up with something more creative? Like, "Are you busy? If not, I'll assign you some tasks."'
But Raj kept these thoughts to himself, knowing Jiraiya was still standing nearby as the camp leader.
"Yes, sir!"
The patrol ninja, a Chunin from the Yamanaka Clan, was far below Jiraiya in rank and status.
After Jiraiya's dismissal, he didn't dare linger and immediately vanished using the Body Flicker Technique.
"Ahem, just a minor hiccup. Now, let's get started on the writing. Heh heh, what do you think would make a good opening? I think adding something a little different would make it more exciting..."
Jiraiya, true to form, couldn't resist returning to his old habits after just three sentences.
Raj had only just steered him back onto the right path with positive reinforcement, and already he was itching to spice things up with his usual embellishments.
Raj immediately rebuked him sternly, "The story's content is like cooking noodles. You can't just throw in every ingredient!
Some flavors are great on their own, but mixing them all together would ruin the taste of the noodles and the other ingredients, meow."
"Hmm... that"
"Makes sense, but a cat eating noodles?" Jiraiya muttered absently, his mind still churning.
"It's a metaphor, a metaphor, meow!" Raj retorted.
"Mm-hmm." Jiraiya remained unfazed by the sharp rebuke, completely forgetting his earlier plans to dunk Raj in a pig cage or hand him over to Orochimaru.
Now, anyone who tried to take Raj away would face his righteous refusal.
He would declare that Raj's assistance was invaluable and that he couldn't do without him.
He tapped his pen against the table, as if deep in thought.
After a few seconds, his eyes lit up.
He tapped his head with the pen, then began scribbling furiously: "Soft, golden hair, breathtakingly beautiful," and similar phrases.
At first, it seemed harmless enough.
But then...
A major clan in the village, with her grandfather and great-uncle overseeing village affairs.
Practically a princess of the Ninja Village?
'Hiss~ This deja vu is overwhelming! Jiraiya, don't court disaster! If you don't court disaster, you won't die.'
Raj only risks his life for Points because he has no choice.
'But Jiraiya has options! With so many characters to draw inspiration from, why choose this one?'
'And the worst part is, I'm his assistant! What if the super-strength woman comes back in a rage, beats up Jiraiya, and then turns on me, the assistant?'
'No, I can't let Jiraiya go down this path...'
Raj quickly spoke up to stop him.
"Meow~ Writing it like this will make people suspect you're implying something about Lady Tsunade, which could bring you unnecessary trouble."
"Hmm... you make a good point." Jiraiya then deleted the phrase "supple golden hair," a series of actions that left Raj dumbfounded.
'Good point, my ass!'
'You deleted the golden hair, but the character's identity is still obviously Tsunade. Isn't this just burying your head in the sand?'
So it had no choice but to argue relentlessly, wearing its mouth dry, until Jiraiya finally agreed to change the character's background.
The revised version still had a strong sense of deja vu, but it wasn't as blatant as before.
'Most importantly, this way it could later explain to Tsunade, "I tried to dissuade him, but he wouldn't listen!"'
The content now involved no artistic merit whatsoever.
Under Jiraiya's clever revisions, the plot became: "Just as the protagonist was about to look, a piece of clothing was thrown onto the bushes, completely blocking his view."