Ever since the conversation about us going to the park together for such a romantic encounter, I couldn't get it out of my head. I kept blushing at the thought of it, always perceiving it as a date, even though it wasn't a date at all nonetheless, the thought wouldn't leave my mind for a single moment.
When we finally arrive at the park, I see a sea of pale pink thousands of cherry blossom trees, the Sakura lining the paths, their branches forming a canopy of cherry blossom leaves. It is breathtakingly beautiful.
A light spring breeze blew, swirling the falling petals through the air, it looked like snow that never melted.
Everywhere you looked, there were people: families laughing on blue plastic tarps, couples walking hand in hand, and the distant sound of children playing. It was the kind of peaceful scenery you find on a postcard.
But for someone like me, it felt rather uncomfortable, the sunlight was too bright, the laughter of strangers too loud.
The birds chirped in the treetops, and I loved that sound I find the chirping of birds wonderful but every time a twig snapped, I flinched inwardly.
The sweet, almost intoxicating scent of the blossoms reminded me a little of Evelyn's scent, which I love so much when she doesn't happen to smell like lavender.
Evelyn had chosen a spot away from the large crowds, under a particularly large tree with a thick trunk and a vast, grand crown of cherry blossom leaves. She spread out the blanket, and for a moment it seemed like she knew exactly what I liked and what I didn't. We are far enough away from the crowds so they don't bother me, the canopy is large enough so the sun doesn't disturb me, and the birds are close enough that I can hear them chirping.
Evelyn settled elegantly onto the blanket and began unpacking small containers of food. She moved with a calmness that almost made me envious. How could she be so peaceful after last night...? I shook the thought away. I didn't want to think about the blood today, I only wanted to think about the pink of the blossoms and about Evelyn. I don't want to ruin the mood, I am here with Evelyn.
>>"Come here, Rin. Sit with me."<<
She said softly, patting the spot right next to her with a loving smile.
I hesitated for a moment, then sat so close to her that our thighs and shoulders touched. Heat immediately rushed to my cheeks, and Evelyn laughed softly a bright, honest sound and brushed a few stray petals out of my hair.
>>"You are unusually quiet today. Do you like it here? Or is there something on your mind?"<<
She asked, looking at me through those clear eyes that seemed so full of care.
I nodded hastily.
>>"It's beautiful, Evelyn. Thank you for bringing me here."<<
She didn't answer right away, instead, she put her arm around my shoulders and pulled me close. I stiffened at first, but then I gave in and leaned my head against her shoulder. She didn't smell like the metal of the warehouse. She smelled like this sweet pollen and like security, she smelled like home.
>>"I know you're afraid, my little one. I know the world out there seems cruel, and that's why I want to show you the beautiful sides of the world."<<
She whispered into my hair and gave me a gentle kiss on the head.
>>"But here, with me, you are safe. I will do everything to keep that smile on your face."<<
Her hand stroked rhythmically over my arm, a soothing beat that made me feel safe, calming. My eyes closed on their own, but in my head, Yoshikage's voice suddenly echoed:
"She sees you as her possession."
At that exact moment, my phone vibrated in my pocket.
A short, sharp tone that cut through the idyll. I knew who it was, and my heart made a painful leap.
I didn't want to check, but I felt I had to, yet I didn't want Evelyn to see it. I grew restless, and Evelyn sensed my unease immediately, loosening her grip slightly.
>>"Everything okay, Rin? Who is writing to you on a weekend?"<<
She asked, and her tone suddenly had that watchful sharpness she always got when she wanted to control something.
The vibration in my pocket felt like a small shock, and I froze. Evelyn's arm still lay heavy and warm around my shoulder, and I didn't want to give up this moment. I didn't want the world out there to destroy this wonderful moment, I liked these moments, I love these moments.
Evelyn sensed my brief flinch and saw that I was hesitating, but she didn't pull her hand back, instead, I noticed her grip grow a fraction tighter. Not painful, rather protective.
>>"Rin? Is everything okay? Don't you want to check?"<<
She asked softly. There was no command in her voice, only a gentle curiosity, but beneath the surface swung that constant watchfulness she can never quite cast off.
>>"Maybe it's important."<<
I shook my head slightly and didn't dare look at her, I couldn't look at her. Instead, I pressed my face a little firmer against her shoulder and inhaled her scent.
>>"It's surely not important. Probably just an ad or... or something from school, it's fine."<<
I lied again, and my heart stumbled at the word "school" again, my chest tightened, much more painfully than before.
>>"I don't want to disturb the moment right now. It's so beautiful here with you."<<.
I felt Evelyn take a deep breath; she seemed to hesitate for a moment. I knew she didn't quite believe me she is simply too smart and too experienced to overlook my sudden tension. But instead of probing further, she decides not to pressure me, she probably wants this peace just as much as I do and enjoys it just as much as I do.
>>"As you wish, you're right."<<
She whispered, stroking my cheek and then my jaw gently with her fingertips.
>>"The world can wait a moment. Today, there is only the two of us and the Sakura trees."<<
She reached for a small strawberry and held it to my lips, it was such a tender gesture, so full of innocent love, that tears welled up in my eyes. How could this woman be the same one who became a monster at night? Is this the real Evelyn? Or is this the mask?
I bit into the fruit, but it tasted bitter because the phone in my pocket vibrated again, twice, briefly. An unambiguous sign that the person on the other end would not let up.
I knew what I was doing. I was abusing her trust while she fed and held me I was playing a double game I didn't even want to play, but Yoshikage's words burned in the back of my mind:
"She sees you as her possession."
Did she only want not to ruin the moment because she wanted to control me? Was her gentleness just a method to keep me tame? I look up at her, into her beautiful eyes, so full of love and affection, and felt more lost than ever before. I don't know what I feel I feel a warmth in my chest and a sense of excitement, but at the same time, I am deathly afraid of her.
We sit there together for an eternity, and Evelyn has truly thought of everything, she even brought a small blanket to warm my legs as the wind grew cooler. Every detail of her picnic was perfectly coordinated. There is no reason for her to get up no forgotten thermos, no missing napkins. She is the perfect protector, the perfect hostess, the perfect partner, and perhaps the perfect liar.
The phone in my pocket was silent now, but it felt like it was burning a hole in my thigh. Curiosity and fear were stronger than the hunger for the strawberries she offered me.
>>"Evelyn? I... I have to go to the restrooms for a moment, if you know what I mean..."<<
I said quietly. It was the only excuse I could think of that I had to go to the bathroom that she wouldn't question.
Evelyn looked at me, and her gaze is calm, but I noticed her eyes briefly dart to my pocket where the phone was. I knew that she knew. She had to know, but she only smiled that soft, sad smile that broke my heart.
>>"Of course, Rin. Should I accompany you? There are many people out."<<
>>"No! No, it's fine. I'll be right back, I promise."<<
My voice was a bit too hasty and unintentionally perhaps even mean.
She nods slowly and still looks at me so sadly.
>>"Go ahead, I'll wait here for you..."<<
She briefly held me by the wrist, her grip is feather-light, but the meaning was clear.
>>"Don't get lost. I don't want you to go missing."<<
I pulled away from her and walked quickly, passing under the blooming trees until I am out of sight behind a large statue. My hands trembled as I took out the phone there are three messages from Mr. Yoshikage.
2:15 PM: "Doesn't she look peaceful? Like a saint who couldn't hurt a fly."
2:18 PM: "Enjoy the strawberries, Rin, but don't forget that those same hands were tearing flesh from bone yesterday."
2:20 PM: A photo.
I froze. The photo was of us. From behind we are sitting on the blanket, Evelyn has her arm around me, and cherry blossoms are falling on us. It looked beautiful, but it also proves that he is here. Somewhere in the crowd, watching us.
My stomach cramped, I feel watched from two sides: By Evelyn, who waited for me on the blanket, and by Mr. Yoshikage, who lurked in the shadows of the trees, obviously ruining the mood.
A fourth message popped up as I stared at the image:
>>"Come to the window tonight at eleven. I will show you the place where you can be free. Without cameras and without her."<<
I delete the messages instantly and right after, I deleted the history as well. My heart was racing so wildly that I felt dizzy, I feel like I'm about to faint. I had to go back to Evelyn, I had to act "normal," while I felt like my whole life was breaking into a thousand shards and I was about to lose consciousness....
I leaned one hand against the cold stone of the statue and took a deep breath, the air still smelled like cherry blossoms, but to me, it now tasted like iron, like fear.
I had to go back, if I stayed away too long, Evelyn would grow suspicious or worse. She would come looking for me and might discover Yoshikage.
With trembling knees, I forced myself to walk back, every face in the crowd now seemed suspicious maybe Mr. Yoshikage has someone here. Is that the photographer? Is that man or woman over there watching me? Yoshikage was here, somewhere in the shadows, and he perhaps enjoyed how I was nearly collapsing under the weight of my lies.
When I reached the clearing with our blanket, Evelyn sat exactly as I had left her. She was staring into the distance, a single cherry blossom petal caught on her shoulder.
When she noticed me, her face brightened, but her eyes remained cool, sad, and searching.
>>"There you are again."<<
She says softly and holds out her hand to me. I placed my hand in hers.
My fingers are ice cold, but hers are warm like glowing coals, and gently Evelyn pulls me back onto the blanket, directly into her lap, and wraps her arms around me. I didn't resist, I couldn't, and I didn't want to I was paralyzed by the knowledge that I am being watched by the monster next to me and the monster in the bushes.
>>"You're all shaky, Rin."<<
She murmurs and wraps the blanket a bit tighter around us both, holding me gently and caringly in her lap.
>>"We should probably start heading home. It's getting chilly."<<
She adds softly and cuddled me gentle.
>>"Yes, let's go home."<<
I whispered against her neck. In that moment, I knew there was no turning back.
I didn't reply to Yoshikage, but he is coming now, and I lied to Evelyn for it. Later, as we both pack our things and walk hand in hand to the car, I no longer felt like a girl on a date, I felt terrible, like the worst person on the planet, and tonight at eleven at the window, Mr. Yoshikage will be waiting for me.