The atmosphere at the festive dinner was slightly tense. SoMi's friends were sitting opposite her with Do Hwan, and they were exchanging glances full of questions. The room was silent except for the clinking of chopsticks against plates and the sounds of people enjoying the food SoMi had prepared.
Do Hwan shyly averted his gaze, slowly chewing his food. He tried to hide the yellow stain from the sauce on his favourite T-shirt with his left hand. SoMi just looked at the three of them, not knowing what to do to defuse the charged atmosphere, made worse by the silence.
"So many flowers?" Lee Hyun finally spoke, glancing at the armful of bouquets lined up in front of the panoramic window.
"Yes, they were all gifts from my colleagues," SoMi smiled.
'What did the director give you?' Lee Hyun asked, immediately looking at the neighbour as if to check his reaction.
"That bouquet of peonies." said SoMi, pointing to the largest of the bouquets. "I haven't opened the present yet."
"Oh, it must be something incredible. Maybe an expensive piece of jewellery or something even more extravagant?" Lee Hyun suggested, sipping champagne. "Let's open it now. Let's find out what's inside," she said.
"Okay, I'll open it," said SoMi, hurriedly taking the box.
"Well, what's in there?" MinJi asked again.
"A pen..." SoMi showed the gift, her voice hinting at disappointment.
"Oh, that's wonderful! You're a writer, and a pen is such a symbolic gift," remarked Lee Hyun.
"Yes..." SoMi smiled feebly, closing the box. At that moment, Do Hwan coughed on his food, as if relieved that the director hadn't guessed right with the gift. He had already learned to read SoMi's emotions, and he immediately understood that she did not like the present.
"By the way, where is the director himself?" MinJi asked.
"He must be planning something incredible if he didn't come to us. It'll probably be a romantic dinner at the most expensive restaurant in Seoul. Mmm," said Lee Hyun.
"No, he's on a business trip to Macau and won't be back today."
"What a pity. MinJi and I were hoping to meet the man who won SoMi's heart," said Lee Hyun, looking at Do Hwan's reaction as she spoke. The guy continued to stare at his plate, almost poking his nose into it.
"He hasn't won anyone over yet. We have a purely professional relationship. We're currently working on editing my book and making corrections," replied SoMi seriously. However, her friends refused to believe her, saying that they already knew what was going on between them.
"Yeah, right, we believe you,' Lee Hyun added, continuing to add fuel to the fire. "That's what they always say when something serious is going on. Have you kissed yet?" her friend suddenly blurted out.
"Lee Hyun!" SoMi cried out, her cheeks flushing uninvited. Hearing this, Do Hwan clenched his fists so tightly that his knuckles turned white. He then abruptly and loudly placed his spoon on the table next to his plate. Everyone's attention shifted to him.
"I'm full." he said, his voice sounding hollow and sharp, like a full stop in a sentence that no one wanted to continue. Lee Hyun had deliberately touched a sore spot. It was unbearable for him to hear. He wanted to say something about the "tasty morsel". But he restrained himself because it was SoMi's birthday today, and he didn't want to ruin it. Yes, he would endure it because it wasn't his place to decide who SoMi should be with. That was her right.
*************
The festive evening was coming to an end. While her friends cleared the table, SoMi walked Do Hwan to the door. He had been silent for almost the entire evening, and SoMi had only caught his gaze from under his fringe from time to time. This was unlike him because he was usually full of conversation. After Lee Hyun kept mentioning the director, he became even more withdrawn. It was as if he were sinking deeper into darkness; even the faint smile on his face had disappeared by the end of the evening. SoMi sensed that something was wrong, but emotions alone don't reveal everything right away.
Do Hwan silently put on his shoes and, while SoMi was distracted, took his gift from the table because, compared to the others, his gift looked like a child's toy. To avoid disappointing SoMi, he hid the gift-wrapped package behind his back. He said a cold "Good night!" and hurried to his apartment without even looking at her.
"Thank you for a wonderful evening, SoMi." MinJi said, putting on her jacket.
"Everything was delicious." Lee Hyun praised her friend. Suddenly, her attention was drawn to a small bouquet of flowers on the hallway table. "Oh, SoMi, what's this?"
"I don't remember anyone giving them to me." she said, surprised, inhaling the pleasant scent of lavender and mint.
"Good night, SoMi." The girls said goodbye. The door closed and the apartment was once again filled with the silence that SoMi disliked so much. As she inhaled the scents of the small bouquet, she suddenly had a thought: it was Do Hwan who had brought it; he hadn't had time to give it to her because of the unexpected incident with the sauce.
************
The kitchen is clean. The washed dishes are lined up on the table to dry. The last drops of water drip from the tap. The quiet hum of the fridge fills the room. The bedroom window is open. A light breeze rustles the curtains, bringing the quiet sounds of traffic and passers-by from the street. The dim light of the table lamp illuminates the room slightly. A fragrant bouquet sits in a vase on the bedside table. SoMi lies in bed, remembering the moment with the spilled sauce and Do Hwan's bare chest. Her cheeks flush red as she thinks of his features — his eyes, cheekbones, Adam's apple and lips — and she feels pleasant butterflies flutter in her stomach.
"Oh, SoMi, what are you thinking about?" she thought, trying to come to her senses, but in vain — the memories were still fresh and almost impossible to suppress. She looked at the flowers and smiled. She picked up her phone and, without thinking twice, wrote a message to Do Hwan:
"Thank you for the flowers. They are beautiful."
Although it was clear from the status above his name that he had been online five minutes ago, she did not receive a reply. She fell asleep waiting for a reply from her neighbour.
Do Hwan saw the pop-up notification about the message from SoMi but didn't read it. He decided that if he became cold towards SoMi, it would be easier to deal with the raging emotions inside him. For the first time, he was angry with himself for not understanding his own feelings. There were plenty of them, all at once: anger, jealousy, hatred and indifference.
Waves of cool summer night air rushed into the room through the open window. Sleep slowly overtook Do Hwan. That day was finally over for him...
***********
It was a warm summer's evening. It hadn't rained for a long time. This year's summer had been dry and hot, and even the nights had not brought the desired coolness. SoMi was returning from dance class. As always, she was dressed in a dress and heels, and she looked stunning. In no hurry to get home, she decided to stroll through the deserted evening streets under the stars.
She hadn't spoken to Do Hwan since then. The message was still unread. Staring at her phone screen, SoMi slowly walked along the cobblestones when, suddenly, the message was read. She stopped in surprise. The message icon lit up. For two long minutes, the three dots danced, but nothing came in response.
"He read my message after two weeks of silence and didn't even reply," SoMi muttered indignantly under her breath. She began to type a text the length of an essay. She looked up. Do Hwan. He emerged from the shop with a bag full of goodies and a sausage in his mouth. He stopped in the middle of the street and stared at his phone. Then he locked it and put it in his shorts pocket. He didn't see SoMi, who was standing just a few steps away. Until a car honked, catching his attention. He froze. SoMi. She stood and looked at him, as beautiful as always. They were both silent. Only Do Hwan chewed his sausage.
"You read it and didn't reply?"
"I was going to reply at home," he said, taking a bite of his sausage.
"Sure," she said, knowing he was lying.
"Why are you alone so late? Why aren't you with the director?"
"We finished work early today. He's at a meeting. I was at Mrs. Min's dance class."
"Yeah," he replied indifferently.
"Do Hwan, let's talk," she suggested, feeling the need for this conversation.
The streetlights illuminated the night-time streets of Seoul. A light breeze rustled the leaves in the trees. The air held the faint promise of rain, but the sky was clear and studded with stars. Do Hwan shuffled along the pavement, counting its squares, and occasionally chewing a sausage in his right hand. His left hand was in the pocket of his shorts and he was carrying a black bag containing food he had bought at the shop.
SoMi walked beside him. The silence of the evening was broken by the click of her heels. She looked at the surrounding houses and glanced at Do Hwan, who showed no sign of breaking the silence. Sooner or later, however, someone would have to speak up, and it looked like it would be SoMi, because she couldn't stand the unspoken tension between them any longer. She didn't like Do Hwan's gloomy grumbling at all.
"Thank you," she said, "for the flowers."
"Oh, yes... you're welcome."
"Why didn't you give them to me when you came?"
"Well... I saw the bouquets you were given for your birthday. Then I looked at mine and compared it to the director's bouquet. Mine looked like a broom."
"It doesn't matter how big the bouquet is, Do Hwan. The important thing is that it was given with care," SoMi remarked. "What mattered to me that evening was that you and my friends were there. The bouquets and gifts were from my colleagues out of respect for me. Of all the flowers, yours smelled the best. They reminded me of my hometown, where the fields smelled of lavender and my grandmother's mint garden." Do Hwan smiled involuntarily.
"I'm sorry," he suddenly said. "That I didn't reply that evening." He bit his lip. "I saw your message, but all that talk about the director upset and angered me a little."
"The director? What has he got to do with it?" SoMi asked in surprise.
"Just..." He paused, reluctant to tell her the whole truth and reveal all his feelings for her. "While he was away, we had dinner together more often and went dancing at Mrs Min's. After your date, you've written less and haven't invited me to dinner. I love our evenings together."
"So what's the problem?" SoMi smiled, not suspecting for a moment that he had lied about everything. He lied about liking having dinner with her. In reality, he adored those evenings spent with her, and her wild dancing to BTS, ATEEZ or MAMAMOO. No matter how tired he was, he waited for her invitation. "I'm sorry I forgot about our dinners together. I'm working late and don't always have time to cook at home."
"Yes, supermarket ramen isn't as tasty as your homemade version," Do Hwan remarked, smiling and hiding his feelings behind that forced smile.
"By the way, I was at your agency. I signed a contract with the studio to shoot a drama with you in the lead role."
"The one I submitted for consideration?" he asked, his eyes widening in surprise.
"Yes."
"I just got a message yesterday saying that they'll be filming a promo for the new drama outside the city. Wow, congratulations! Your book is going to be made into a film after all.'
"Thanks to you. I won't miss the filming for anything. I want to see how everything happens behind the scenes."
"I'll give it my all," he said, bowing to the girl who would now be his mentor. Only she knew how to convey the emotions of the main characters because she had created them and lived through the story with them on the page. SoMi smiled.
"Do Hwan, please reply to my messages. I don't like it when people ignore me. Especially people who are close to me. It makes me feel useless."
"Okay. Sorry again for not replying..."
*************
The elevator rose almost imperceptibly. SoMi stood in one corner and Do Hwan stood in the opposite one. They remained silent but exchanged glances and smiles. When the doors finally opened, they stepped out into the hallway. Each of them headed for their own door.
"Good night," said SoMi as she entered the code into her door lock.
"Good night," replied Do Hwan, opening his door. The first thing he saw was the gift for SoMi that he had taken back home because he was embarrassed by it. "SoMi~ya," he called out, stopping her just as she was about to close the door. "Wait!" he called, running up to her doorstep. "Here..." He handed her a small package wrapped in gift paper with a bow. "This is your birthday present. I'm sorry I didn't give it to you that evening — I was embarrassed."
"Thank you," she replied uncertainly, taken aback. She started to open it.
'No, wait...' he said, stopping her. "Open it when you're alone. I tried not to forget anything. You can fill in the rest," said Do Hwan intriguingly.
"Oh, okay."
"Good night," he said, smiling happily as he said goodbye, then almost jumped as he ran to his apartment.
************
The bedroom was pleasantly cool. A sharp wind blew through the open window from time to time, scattering the curtains in all directions. The smell of rain hung in the air and black, stormy clouds with flashes of lightning were visible behind the houses. A storm was approaching.
Finally getting herself ready, SoMi lay down on the bed in her bathrobe. She began to unwrap the gift from Do Hwan. It was a diary with the words "SoMi's Diary of Dreams and Desires" written on the cover. The cover seemed to have been custom-made for Do Hwan, as the letters were printed and embossed on the binding. She opened it and began to look through it.
Legend:
Green check mark: wish fulfilled.
Red check mark: needs to be fulfilled.
Red circle: immediate fulfilment of a dream.
Green circle: wish in progress.
Yellow star: cherished dream.
She began to flip through the pages. The first page was titled "The First Wish" and had a green tick next to "a massag". The second page was for dance lessons and had a green circle as well as an attached photo of SoMi dancing. Do Hwan had taken this photo during a break from dancing with the old ladies at the dance school. The third page was for a film adaptation of a book, with a green circle and the title of her first book. Do Hwan had read it and suggested it for a film adaptation. There were many, many more pages like this, filled with moments they had experienced together. There were still many more to be filled.
SoMi looked at the diary and smiled, because those pages contained the most pleasant memories she had made since moving here. There were also plenty of photos. It seemed that Do Hwan had created this special gift with great care and consideration. That diary became the best gift of her entire life.