Venti was just talking big in the end—he didn't actually do anything. He still knew there were lines you couldn't cross.
If he dared, the retired Zhongli would turn into a war god and beat him half to death.
He wouldn't kill him, sure. But he'd make him wish he were dead.
"Koji, look! I found a four-star one-handed sword!"
Inside the Serenitea Pot, Lumine proudly showed off her latest treasure-chest haul. Finally—something actually useful.
"A salted-fish greatsword? …Wait, no. It's a one-handed sword."
Koji blinked, staring at the weapon. It looked ridiculously similar to the famous salted-fish greatsword, but scaled down to one-handed-sword size.
"You opened this in Inazuma, didn't you?"
There was basically no way you'd get something like this anywhere else. The thing might be tough, but it definitely felt more like a gag weapon.
"You're spot-on. It looks kind of weird, but it's still a four-star one-handed sword." Lumine swung the salted-fish sword a couple times.
After traveling the world for so many years, this was the first time she'd ever seen a weapon this bizarre. Still, in terms of hardness, it absolutely didn't lose to other four-star one-handed swords of the same tier.
It was just… if anyone saw her charging in while holding a salted fish, they'd probably laugh so hard they'd spit on the spot.
"The salted-fish series doesn't just have the one-handed sword," Koji said. "There's also the claymore, Luxurious Sea-Lord."
To be honest, even Koji was seeing the salted-fish one-handed sword for the first time.
"There's a greatsword too…?"
Lumine's mouth twitched. This kind of nonsense actually formed an entire weapon series?
"Basically, these weapons are made from fish," Koji explained. "So if you ever run out of food, they can be emergency rations."
A weapon made from air-dried sea fish—absurdly hard. But if it was processed properly, you could totally eat it.
And just like Luxurious Sea-Lord, this one-handed sword probably boosted Elemental Burst damage too, and could even summon a giant tuna slam for AoE damage.
"Emergency rations…?"
Lumine turned and looked at Paimon.
So it's the same as Paimon—emergency food.
"Hey! Lumine! What are you thinking?! Paimon is NOT emergency food!" Paimon puffed up, stamping her little feet.
She was the best companion! Not emergency food!
And comparing her to a salted fish was just plain hurtful, okay?!
"Paimon, you're honestly less useful than this salted-fish one-handed sword," Lumine said with her hands on her hips.
Everyone knew Paimon's combat power was worse than one-fifth of a wild boar—basically the same as having no combat power at all.
A good one-handed sword could directly increase the user's strength. The impact on combat power was obvious at a glance.
"Hmph! I'm mad! If you don't give Paimon ten servings of Sweet Madame, Paimon won't talk to you! And Paimon won't help you find the way either!"
Being told she was worse than a sword made Paimon both jealous and furious.
"Just kidding," Lumine said softly. "Even if a one-handed sword can raise combat strength, Paimon's role is still irreplaceable."
As a guide, Paimon really was competent. Terrain, mechanisms—she knew a thing or two about a lot of things.
She just ate a bit too much.
Could it be that Paimon was storing energy through food… to recover to her peak?
"Hmph hmph! Good that you know!" Paimon's mood instantly improved. "The Lumine-and-Paimon duo? We totally go in and wipe everything!"
Koji deadpanned, "So Lumine handles the 'wipe everything' part, and Paimon handles the 'go in and—ga-ga'?"
He couldn't help thinking of Paimon's "ga-ga—mechanical—ga-ga—"
"Uh… that… actually doesn't seem wrong," Paimon said, scratching her head. Even if she "helped," she'd mostly just drag Lumine down.
If she really had some hidden power, it'd be great if she could use it right now.
"Paimon can be the cheerleader and shout encouragement!" someone suggested.
"No thanks," Lumine said with a laugh, shaking her head. "I don't want to get distracted by something like that. Paimon can just watch from the side."
Then Lumine's eyes brightened with excitement. "Koji, when are you going to another world?"
"After a while," Koji said. "Through my blessing, I already found the coordinates for the Ultra universe. When the time comes, we can go take a look."
"Giant-of-Light Chainsaw Man?"
Lumine's eyes lit up. She was seriously looking forward to visiting the world of the Giants of Light—she'd watched a ton of Ultraman tokusatsu.
"Yeah," Koji replied. "Horn-Breaking Maniac Tiga, Crutch Alien Seven, Meat-Plant Director Ace, Ultraman Sixth Brother Taro…"
"I've seen all those!" Lumine said eagerly. "Crutch Alien is so accurate. And Leo really is miserable."
"When heaven is about to place a great responsibility on a person… forget it. Leo really is miserable," Koji sighed. "If he can't beat a monster, then Seven puts him through hellish training. At that intensity, it honestly feels personal."
Sure, once Leo showed up later, he didn't really get bullied much anymore.
But in his own TV series, he suffered way too much.
"You think… if we gift Leo a jeep, he'll be happy?" Lumine raised an eyebrow, grinning.
Koji's mouth twitched. "You're brutal. You want to give him that? Are you trying to make his dead memories attack him again?"
"By your logic, we should just give Leo a life-size Seven doll," Koji continued. "He'd definitely love it."
If there was a group fight, Leo would show up immediately no matter what.
And when Seven trained Zero, there was absolutely personal resentment mixed in.
What kind of normal person opens with Leo Kick straight at Zero? Whatever move he had, he used it on Zero without holding back.
And when Zero was in trouble—like that Mechanical Seven incident—Leo could even cross dimensions to come save the day. Just to join the brawl.
"That makes sense!" Lumine nodded seriously, eyes sparkling. "Honey, you're a genius."
Leo needed three Seven-shaped punching bags.
"Don't plan that far ahead," Koji said. "We don't even know if we'll definitely meet Leo."
"What are you guys even talking about?" Paimon blurted out.
Paimon couldn't understand any of it. These two were chatting away like it was nothing—could they please consider Paimon for once?
"Haha, sorry—let me explain," Lumine said, laughing.
And she started telling Paimon some Ultraman stories.
If they ever left this world, they would definitely bring Paimon with them. They weren't separable anymore.
Paimon listened with great interest. These stories were really fun—things she'd never heard before.
The world beyond worlds… really was vast.
"Lumine, why do those Ultramen protect humans?" Paimon asked. "Are they like gods too?"
"That's kind of complicated," Lumine admitted, then turned to Koji. "Honey, what do you think?"
Koji thought for a moment, then answered:
"Ultramen protect humans because it's their duty as space police, their mission as guardians of civilization, their trust in the brilliance of human nature, and the deep bonds they've formed with humanity…"
Because humans waited and waited for someone to save them, Ultramen stepped in—helping them defeat powerful enemies humans could never handle on their own.
"Ultramen love the 'spark' in the human race," Koji continued. "But gods and demon gods have the concept of 'loving people' in their own way too. The two are definitely different."
Paimon nodded her little head.
So that's how it is.
Truly… noble, powerful beings.
(End of Chapter)
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