Chapter Nineteen – Dangerous Knowledge
The first sensation Jack experienced was cold; the next was the feeling of drowning in a sea of fog; his feet could no longer touch the ground. Ice made its way into his veins, making him shake. Was this witch – it had to be a witch – going to kill him by giving him hypothermia? Maybe it wasn't that bad a way to go; according to some explorers who'd lived to tell the tale, it was like falling asleep from one point onward.
He was on his back now, and the bloodshed from before was nowhere in sight. He got up, feeling solid ground under his feet for a change.
"Vince? Theo?" he called out.
The sound of his voice seemed to be absorbed by the silence surrounding him. It was dark, but not pitch-black. Still, Jack's brain found now to be the optimal moment to recall he was really afraid of the dark.
"Hello? Is anyone there?" he made another attempt. "I'm good people, I swear," he added, pretty damn sure that the 'other', whoever was observing him in silence, had to be the opposite of that.
You don't belong here.
"Duh… I mean that's pretty obvious," Jack commented out loud. "I was born for places where they serve hot tea, muffins, chocolate chip cookies…you know, all the good things in life. Also, for comfortable beds, and I see none of those around here."
His voice was trembling, but talking did him good, because then he didn't have time to think about being scared.
That didn't last long, however. The wind whipped by him, ruffling his clothes, making him aware of how vulnerable he was, lost in the fog.
You're too small and weak. They don't need you. He doesn't need you.
"Are you my negative self-talk? Because that keeps telling me the same thing," Jack said, his voice high-pitched and tinged with fear. "Fear not," he proclaimed. "I have just the remedy for you. All I need is a positive affirmation, and you won't know what hit you."
Too bad Jack couldn't recall one such affirmation at the moment. The fog shifted around him, trapping him in a nightmarish world. Any new words he wanted to mutter got caught in his throat.
Give up. You're of no use to him.
At the sound of that cavernous voice, Jack felt something he hadn't felt since meeting Vince and Theo – utterly alone.
***
The place where the field mouse had stood until one moment ago was empty. The echoes of a cry bounced off the tall walls of the mountains around, dying quickly. Theodore felt his head snap in several different directions in quick succession, as his nostrils flared. His wolf growled, ready to attack.
But attack what?
"Jack!" Vince shouted from only a few feet away. "Come on, this isn't funny. We won't laugh at you anymore."
"He's gone," Theodore said in a rough, low voice. His wolf was scratching his insides raw. He wanted to break through skin if necessary so he could track down the clairvoyant.
"What do you mean, gone?" Vince reacted.
His voice was too loud, and the unhidden reproach behind it too obvious to ignore.
"Maybe he's fallen," Vince said, hurrying in the direction of the edge of the cliff.
Theodore growled. "That wasn't a fall."
His wolf sensed something. He smelled someone, a presence that reminded Theodore of his childhood, of the smell of ash burning at the back of his throat.
"He was taken," he growled again, making Vince turn, stopping dead in his tracks.
The human guardian didn't have a wolf, and he didn't have the clairvoyant's ability to see beyond the physical world around him. Theodore didn't know whether to pity or envy him. Vince, unlike him, was deaf and blind to the danger drawing close.
"If he was taken, we're going to take him back," Vince declared.
Theodore threw his head back and let out a lonely wolf's cry before he could control it. He wouldn't lose Jack to this presence. He wouldn't allow himself to lose another of his pack.
***
The mist rolled over him like cotton candy; Jack liked to imagine that he could see colors, that this wasn't some mean old fog guarding dark secrets, but an assortment of candy floss flavors he only needed to reach out and grab a handful of.
Of course, having a wild imagination could only take him so far under the circumstances. His teeth were chattering, and he was panting in fear. Whatever was hiding in the fog, it obviously knew his weak points and had no qualms about twisting the knife in the wound.
Sure, he was small and weak. Sure, he was holding everyone back. Wouldn't it have been better for him to just stay behind, regardless of what the cards said?
Jack held his head in his hands. It was unusual for him to fall prey to despair, but he felt so lost he could hardly breathe right now. He didn't like or watch horror movies. Unlike other kids, he didn't think going through the traps and tests of a haunted house was awesome.
So why was this happening to him?
A low whine, animal-like in nature, pulled him out of his spiraling self-doubt. Jack winced as he saw the same shapes he had seen before coming out of the haze.
"You are…" he whispered shakily, "Theodore's pack."
The wolves, emaciated and weakened, didn't pass through him this time. They stopped in front of him, turning into shadows of men and women. Their eyes were sad and hollow. Jack's heart filled with the need to help them, but what could he do?
"What can I do?" he asked.
They didn't answer. Instead, they began falling, as if the thing keeping them upright had suddenly vanished in the fog.
The visions flared again before Jack's eyes. The battlefield was there, and the blood glinted crimson-red, filling Jack's heart with terror.
But there was no sign of Theo now. Were these visions showing him the past or the future? Jack wished he had a guide in this world of shadows. All clairvoyants needed one, so why had he been left without one?
A small shape darted the corpses of the wolves. Jack moved closer, despite his natural cowardice. It looked like another wolf, but smaller in size than the others. Of course, compared to any dog Jack had seen in his life, it was still bigger. But he was definitely a young one.
Was he crying over his fallen pack members? Jack thought he'd be strong enough to offer the poor creature some comfort, despite his – most likely – big fangs and claws and everything.
His stomach lurched as he understood the truth. The young wolf wasn't searching for signs of life among the corpses in hope of finding at least one pack member alive. No, from time to time, his muzzle dug deep and pulled at something.
He was murdering those who were still alive!
"What are you doing?" Jack shouted, surprised by his own reaction. "Get away from them, you… you beast!"
The wolf stopped. He turned eyes to Jack, putting the fear of everything holy in his poor bones.
The terror of realization tore through Jack's heart like a red-hot knife. He knew those eyes. He knew them. It couldn't be… That…
Do you see what he's hiding?
The treacherous voice called to him again. Jack knew his glasses weren't the problem as his vision blurred. His eyes were welling up with tears; that was what was going on.
There's no salvation for a murderer.
"You're lying!" Jack shouted. "You're just a creepy voice who wants to scare me, that's all!"
He looked at the wolf again. His eyes had shifted to a deep red. Inside them, Jack read another truth.
The young wolf was possessed. A strange being had taken hold of him and was now controlling him.
Jack wiped his cheeks furiously.
"Is that all you got?" he asked, even as the dangerous knowledge nestled in his heart like a worm in the flesh of an apple.
Cavernous laughter was his only answer.
***
Vince hurried down the path that opened before them, the fog splitting as if guiding them in that direction. There was no sign of Jack anywhere, no matter how often and how loudly he shouted his name. Theodore was certain Jack had been taken by someone, and while Vince would have gladly dismissed such a thought because it scared him worse than a fall—
Scared? He wasn't easily scared. Why was he thinking of feeling scared when he should be focusing on their search for Jack?
Theodore crouched near the ground. He seemed to be sniffing the trail. Seeing how bad things were, Vince was surprised the alpha hadn't unleashed his wolf yet. But maybe that was for the best, because Theodore had to be in control instead of being reduced to his beast state.
"You said he was taken," Vince said, walking near. "Who took him, Theodore?"
The ice-like eyes met his briefly. "An evil presence."
Vince couldn't help feeling that the alpha was hiding something from him. He crossed his arms and gave Theodore a hard stare. "You will have to be more specific than that, alpha."
Being called that seemed to get a rise out of Theodore. In one swift move, he was on his feet, facing Vince head on.
"All you had to do was watch him. What were you doing, guardian?"
Vince flinched as guilt gripped his heart. He had let Jack out of his sight for a mere moment… or had he?
"You are a big bad wolf. Can't you sniff out the one who took Jack? They snatched him from right under your nose, didn't they?"
Theodore wavered under Vince's direct accusation. A dark satisfaction took over Vince for a moment. He opened his mouth to speak further when he caught something out of the corner of one eye. Something lying on the ground, farther up on the trail.
That sole distraction was enough to bring about a surprising sense of discomfort. Mental discomfort. He blinked and stared at Theodore, who looked ready to tear into him for daring to speak to him as he had.
"I'm sorry," he said, still dumbfounded. "I have no idea what came over me to accuse you like that."
To his dismay, Theodore hung his head low. "I should have protected him. You are correct."
Vince didn't have the time to pick his jaw up off the ground, seeing Theodore Pembroke behaving so strangely apologetic.
"We have both been charged with his protection," he said, squeezing Theodore's upper arm briefly. "So let's find him together. No more blaming."
Theodore looked bewildered by his words. But Vince knew they had to hurry. "There, on the ground," he pointed at the object that had caught his attention. "Isn't that one of Jack's cards?"
Theodore zoomed to the thing in an instant. Vince hurried after him. Jack might be in danger, but he had two strong people rushing to the rescue.
***
The visions melted into the fog again. Jack reached into his pocket, an unconscious gesture that had helped him calm his nerves in the past. Usually, he'd find one of his strange lucky charms there and squeeze it with all his might until the fear went away.
He was surprised to find his cards. Hadn't they burned to ashes before? That gave him hope. This ghost, whatever it was, was playing with his mind, but it didn't know that Jack wasn't so easy to fool. All those visions had to be fake, and he needed—
The cards flew out of his hands, blown away by a gust of wind. He scampered after them, trying to grab hold of at least one, but doing that was harder than herding cats.
A coward's tools, the voice taunted him mercilessly. Do you truly think that handling painted paper will help you see the truth?
"How about you keep that attitude to yourself?" Jack snapped. "And painted paper has gotten me this far, so you have no right to throw shade, you damn… wannabe."
He raised his eyes from the ground, feeling another presence nearby. A breath of relief expanded in his chest.
"Vee, boy am I glad to see you," he said and hurried toward his friend.
But Vince just stood there, as if he wasn't seeing Jack hurrying to him at all. His eyes were empty, and he appeared to be staring at nothing.
Let's face it, Jack. You're nothing but dead weight.
"Is this another of your stupid tricks?" Jack grunted. "Vince, hey, right here. Can't you see me?" He waved with all his might, but Vince didn't notice him at all.
Jack's resolve began to falter. He knew, deep down in his heart, that this was yet another of the voice's tricks, but his heart wasn't easy to convince of that simple truth.
Theodore appeared at Vince's side. His eyes held only contempt. Jack stopped, holding the few cards he had managed to pick up close to his chest.
We should have never brought you along. All you do is get into trouble, always expecting someone else to help you. You're nothing but useless trash.
Jack felt his chest getting tight. "No," he whispered, "that's not true." He raised his hands. "I have these cards, and they tell me—I mean, they can… I read the cards for you," he said quickly, as if there wasn't enough time for him to get all the words out, and there never would be.
Your place is not with them. The voice returned, feigning kindness now. Come with me, little seer. I'll show you where you belong.
Jack looked ahead. Theodore and Vince were now only ghostly shadows in the distance. A sense of foreboding and dread gripped his heart. All his life, hadn't he feared exactly this? That if he became attached to someone again they would just abandon him, leave him behind?
Those words were true, as a figment of the voice's tricks as they might be. He was too weak, too small to help in any way that mattered. He was only a burden, and the only way he could help was to leave everyone alone so they could continue without him.
He knelt on the ground, suffocating with the realization that had been chasing him all of his life. When had he ever been truly needed? Doors were always closing behind him, leaving him in the dark. He was always alone, roaming the streets without anyone wondering whether he was fine or needed something.
No one cared if he vanished. He was caught in the same pattern again, in this useless hope that tried to convince him that he could be of even a little use when he wasn't because he was only poor little Jack, the same boy who no one loved.
Come with me, and you will serve me well, little seer.
Wouldn't that be easy? The voice seemed kind now. This was someone who needed Jack, as small and weak and useless as he was.
Throw those cards away. You have no use for them now. You will never need to think at all once you have become entirely mine.
A gnarly hand appeared out of the mist, open and inviting. Jack only needed to touch it; he knew that because he now had knowledge of things that no one else had. That gave him power, didn't it?
He looked at the cards that remained in his hands: the sun, the moon, and the wolf. Had they ever meant anything at all?
Come now, the voice insisted. You know they will never love you.
Jack stared at the cards again, caught in a mental haze that made it difficult for him to form a single coherent thought.
***
"This card is glowing," Vince said.
Theodore could barely keep his wolf in check. He took the card from Vince and inhaled its scent. That smell of cinnamon would be with him forever, tormenting him if he didn't do the right thing now.
"Guardian," he said in a tense voice, "I must give my wolf free rein. It is the only way to track Jack down in the world of shadows he has been dragged to."
"All right," Vince agreed. "Are you telling me that so I won't get scared once you're in full beast mode?"
Theodore threw Vince a bewildered look. How could the guardian joke under these circumstances? But what he read in Vince's eyes convinced him that it was just the human's way of dealing with a situation that terrified them both.
"We will not lose him," he said through his teeth as his wolf trembled with the anticipation of a hunt.
"I'll hold you to that. Go ahead. I'll be right behind you," Vince promised.
There was nothing else Theodore needed. His wolf broke free, ready to destroy the mountains themselves to find Jack.
TBC