The plastic bags clinked in Hana's hands like they were doing it on purpose, like the bottles inside wanted attention. But Hana refused to give in. Not yet. Not until she was back at her apartment.
When she got there, she entered the code at the front gate and was just unlocking her door when someone came toward her.
Sayuri, Hana's next-door neighbor, lifted a hand in greeting and looked up at her. That same sparkle was in her eyes again, the one she always had. Hana had found it cute ever since they'd met.
Even if it reminded her of someone else.
"Heeey, Hana!" Sayuri called out in that bright voice.
The lock clicked. Hana quickly set her groceries inside the apartment first. Sayuri didn't need to know any of that. Then she lifted an arm too, fingers forming her signature peace sign, and smiled back.
"Saaayurii!! What's up?"
"The sky!" Sayuri shot back, cheeky, while she studied Hana with her hands clasped behind her back.
Oldest joke in the book. Hana still grinned.
"Wow, someone's feeling clever today."
"Maybe. But only if clever is cute!"
They both giggled until a light gust of wind cut in. Sayuri's shoulder-length pastel purple hair fluttered, a few strands falling into her face. She brushed them away with a quick motion.
"Oh—by the way, Hana!"
"Hm? What's up? — I dare you to bring the sky joke again."
"Earlier there was this girl at the gate."
Hana's pupils widened instantly.
"She kept yelling your name and hammering the intercom like a psycho."
Sayuri pointed at the entrance gate.
"It really looked like she had zero clue what she was doing." She covered her mouth, amused. "Anyway—she basically woke up half the building."
Shame made Hana's mouth twitch awkwardly, her face going hot.
"So then I knocked on your door," Sayuri continued with a shrug, "but you weren't home."
"That seemed to make her even more upset than she already was. She kicked the gate one more time—like, loud—and then disappeared as fast as she showed up." Sayuri giggled again, but this time she was laughing alone.
Shit…
Lyra had been here. And the way Sayuri described it, she must've assumed the worst.
Hana heard Lyra's words from last night in her head: "If I let you walk out now, I might lose you for good." And then her text: "I'm not scraping you off the street if you drink yourself into a coma again."
Shit, I should've just left her some kind of fucking message or something.
FUCK.
Hana ground her teeth. And Lyra not picking up at all now? That wasn't just weird. That was wrong.
Panic crawled up Hana's chest and squeezed tight. Her throat went dry, like it was already demanding liquid as compensation.
"Oh. Uh, okay—yeah, that was probably… a friend of mine…" Hana noticed could hear how serious her own voice suddenly sounded.
"What's going on?" Sayuri asked, head tilted.
"Nothing, I just—uh… I think she left her skateboard at my place recently."
Jesus, what am I even saying?!
Sayuri's eyes lit up.
"Whaaaat! She skates?" Her mouth hung wide open.
She didn't even give Hana a chance to answer.
"Do you skate too?!"
Hana's thoughts were already somewhere else. She had to go look for Lyra, who was probably out looking for Hana herself. A stupid cat-and-mouse game, except somehow both girls were the cat.
"Hey, Sayuri… can we talk about this another time? I really gotta go."
The sparkle in Sayuri's eyes faded, but she nodded gently anyway. A little disappointed, but still smiling.
"Sorry. I won't forget, okay?" Hana promised, while internally wanting to slap herself.
"Do you remember when it was? And which way she went?"
"Hmm…" Sayuri tapped a finger against her lip. "She sprinted straight back the way she came. That was like… an hour ago."
"Thanks, Sayuri. I'll make it up to you!" Hana promised.
Sayuri waved her off with a cheery nod and padded back toward her own apartment.
"Gooood luuuck!"
Hana managed one last smile, an honest one, even, then went inside. Her throat was already burning.
The second the door shut behind her, she grabbed the beer and slammed the first bottle. Then another. For once, her speed-drinking was useful for something.
Once the craving had been shoved back into its cage, she bolted.
Down the street under the tangled power lines, where she and Lyra had walked together yesterday. Her legs got weak faster than she would've liked. But that didn't stop her.
Where would you go, Lyra?
Breathing hard, Hana's gaze swept the different streets at the small intersection. A look to the left. Same way as yesterday.
The shopping street!
Hana remembered how she'd stared at that one bar there, "Heaven's Gate." And how Lyra had waved her gaze away with that sharp little motion.
She probably thinks I'd go buy alcohol at a konbini around here. It's basically right next door.
She took off again, as fast as her legs would carry her. In the small supermarket, she asked the cashier if a silver-haired girl had been there.
And, holy shit, yes!
The cashier even pointed which direction Lyra had gone. Apparently she'd left quite an impression.
Geez, Lyra… I've never seen you this uncool…
Hana almost had to grin at the thought. But she kept running.
Why won't she pick up? The question hammered through her head with every step.
With every shop she asked in, the trail got thinner. The last info she got was from a bearded guy who said he'd seen a woman stumbling through the streets, around Tengachaya. After that, nothing.
Why?
Hana finally stopped at another intersection. It looked like the last four. She braced her hands on her knees and sucked in air. Her throat burned, for once, not from thirst.
Did you give up and go home?
The thought didn't help. It only added another layer of insecurity. Hana had no clue where else to look. If Lyra was still moving, they might never find each other.
With a sharp, frustrated exhale, Hana pulled out her phone and lit the screen like a prayer.
No new messages.
Fuck, Lyra. What am I supposed to do? Where are you?
She clenched her jaw. Her heavy breathing boomed in her ears. Her face was on fire, her legs threatening to fold. A sweat drop fell onto the phone—making the screen glow brighter. Lyra's missed calls were still sitting there in her notifications.
Whatever.
Hana wiped the sweat away and unlocked the phone again. She opened Lyra's contact and stared at the call button. Maybe, in some universe, Lyra would pick up now.
And then, suddenly, there it was. A familiar melody. Groovy electric bass, those synthy horn sounds layered on top.
That sounds like—
Like the Driftveil City theme from Pokémon!
The music was coming from a small alley right beside her. Hana ran before the melody could die, even though every step hurt.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
Asaki was just coming back from the konbini, a bag of onigiri and a bottle of green tea in her hand.
Her small apartment was only two blocks away, but she'd taken the longer route through the side streets. The main roads were too loud for her.
When she turned the corner, she froze.
Someone was there. A familiar silhouette, moving down fast one of the grimy alleys. That dark hair. That way of walking…
Hana.
What's she doing here?
Asaki ducked instinctively behind a row of trash bins, clutching her shopping bag tight. Her heart started pounding. Fate? A chance?
She watched Hana go deeper into the alley and followed her carefully.
Then she saw it.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
In the dark alley, almost as filthy as Rudi's place, someone was sitting on the ground. Right next to a dumpster, like they wanted to get collected with the trash.
Lyra.
Hana almost tripped over a pile of garbage bags as she sprinted toward her. "Ly—Lyra?! Hey!"
She shoved her phone away and crouched down beside her.
"Hey… earth to Lyra?"
Lyra didn't react. Her silver-white hair was a mess Hana had never seen before. Chaotic strands draped over her face, hiding the red eyes underneath. It honestly looked like someone had knocked her out.
Slowly the panic returned to Hana, but she couldn't let it overwhelm her. Not now. Hana searched for some reassurance in Lyra's face, but found only dirt and stillness.
Please… Lyra… please don't.
Just to be sure, Hana pressed two fingers against Lyra's throat. It almost got lost in her own trembling, but there was a pulse. Weaker than it should be, though.
"LYRA!" Hana screamed right into her face, her voice trembling on the edge of breaking.
Then, something twitched.
Something stirred in Lyra's face, even if it was barely visible in the darkness. In slow motion, she raised her chin, then her eyelids, just a crack. Her eyes were sluggish and empty, like she'd just endured ten clients.
Even the rise and fall of her chest was so slow that Hana had to look closely just to notice it.
What the hell happened?
Hana's gaze snapped to the open handbag beside Lyra. Between lipstick and crumpled receipts was a crushed blister pack.
Empty.
She grabbed it and flipped it over.
Xanax.
The letters stared back at her like she was supposed to know what to do now.
Holy fuck. Holy fuck.
"Lyra! LYRA!"
She shook her by the shoulders, not too hard, but hard enough. Lyra's eyes shimmered for a moment, glassy and blank.
"You… you were gone…" Lyra mumbled.
"Yeah, fuck, I was gone, BUT YOU CAN'T JUST—" Hana's voice cracked off.
"How many, Lyra? HOW MANY?!"
No reaction.
Shit, how many did she take? Are five too much? ten? Can you die from this?
She stuffed the blister pack into her bag and pulled Lyra up. Lyra's body was heavy. Her arms hung limply and her legs buckled immediately.
Shit, how am I supposed to do this?
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
Asaki pressed herself tighter against the trash bin and held her breath.
Lyra.
There she was, collapsed beside a dumpster like thrown-out garbage. Exactly where she belonged.
But Hana… Hana ran to her. Worried. For her. For that arrogant slut who did nothing but spread poison and hate.
Asaki carefully pulled out her phone. Muted it. Started taking pictures.
Click.
Lyra unconscious next to the garbage.
Click.
Hana, desperately checking her pulse.
Click.
The empty pill pack in Hana's shaking hand.
This was gold. Pure gold.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
The way out of the alley was endless.
Hana was dragging more than supporting. After a few steps, her arms and shoulders were burning. Actually, everything was. Lyra's feet slid sluggishly across the dirty ground, sometimes stumbling, threatening to bring them both down.
The alley spilled into a main street. Cars rushed past. People walked by and threw quick, bored looks at them. To everyone else, they probably just looked like two drunk girls.
Hana stopped and gasped, pathetic, breath ripping out of her. Sweat was already sliding down her forehead, her shirt sticking to her back.
Lyra sagged heavy in her arms, head dropped forward.
"Lyra? Can you hear me?"
A faint mumble. Something. At least something.
At the bus stop, Hana had to sit Lyra down on the bench. Lyra immediately slumped sideways, Hana caught her just in time. The other people waiting stared and whispered quietly.
As if it's any of your business.
On the bus, it got worse. Lyra kept slipping off the seat. Hana had to basically hold her in her lap. The bus driver shot them pissed looks in the rearview mirror.
Lyra's head was heavy on Hana's shoulder. Her breath tickled warm against Hana's neck, coming in bursts and irregular. Sometimes it stopped for a moment, then came back.
Please don't. Please don't stop breathing.
Hana's heart was pounding so loud in her chest she swore even that asshole driver could hear it.
If she could just give Lyra one beat of it. Just a little. Put some of it into Lyra's chest so it would get louder again.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
Asaki followed the bus in a taxi. The driver had answered her request to "follow discreetly" with a knowing grin, and an extra fee.
Through the fogged-up bus windows, she could barely make out how Hana was practically holding Lyra in her lap. How intimate it looked.
Get away from Hana.
"Closer," she murmured to the driver and raised her phone.
The photo came out blurred through the dirty glass and distance. Barely any details, just two silhouettes pressed together. But for someone who knew what they were looking for? It was enough.
Click. Click. Click.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
By the time Hana reached her apartment building, every step was a new fight. Lyra hung heavy and limp off her like her body had cut its connection to reality. Her feet dragged uselessly over the asphalt. Hana was basically carrying her now.
The stairwell greeted them with cold indifference. Their rough breathing echoed between the bare walls. On the first steps, Hana's muscles started giving up. And with every step, Lyra got heavier.
"Please, Lyra," Hana whispered hoarsely. "You gotta help me a little."
But Lyra was somewhere else, far away, where words couldn't reach. Her body was here, but inside she was empty.
When they finally reached the first floor door, Hana was at the end of her strength. She leaned Lyra briefly against the wall, pressed her forehead against the cold tiles and closed her eyes while sweat ran down her temples.
The door stuck like always. Hana shoved it open with her shoulder.
Inside, the apartment greeted them with its familiar chaos.
Clothes lay scattered on the floor, dirty dishes piled up on the small table, and the stale smell of alcohol and cigarette smoke hung in the air. Lyra noticed none of it. Her head hung limply to the side, the silver-white hair clinging damp to her pale skin.
Hana carefully laid her on the bed, sheets a wrinkled mess that hadn't been changed in weeks. Lyra sank into the pillow, her hair spread around her head like spilled paint.
Hana dropped to her knees beside the bed, her hand trembling as she placed it gently against Lyra's chest. A weak heartbeat under her fingertips. Shallow breathing. Sometimes stalling.
"Fuck, what do I do… hospital?" She whispered desperately, but fear choked her throat. Her fingers grabbed for her phone and were shaking so badly that she typed the wrong letters several times.
"xanax overdose what to do"
Search results blurred into a sea of warnings and cold facts. Hana looked back at Lyra, silent and fragile, like a porcelain doll that would shatter if you touched her wrong.
For the first time, Hana was the one holding the responsibility. And she was terrified she wouldn't be good enough.
Hana forced herself to look back at the search results, scrolling fast while the panic slowly transformed into a dull, unbearable pressure.
"Okay. Okay… calm down. Not lethal. Probably not…"
The lines slipped through her head without sticking, while she tried to concentrate. Drowsiness, confusion, slowed reflexes. Only dangerous in combination with alcohol or other substances.
A quick glance at Lyra. Her chest rose and fell slightly, her breathing was shallow, her face pale, almost translucent.
"She's not gonna die," Hana whispered, half desperate, half trying to convince herself. She set the phone aside and sat carefully on the edge of the bed. Lyra's forehead was cool and damp with sweat. Her breathing was slowly becoming more regular.
"You fucking idiot," Hana rasped, with a flicker of anger. "Why would you scare me like this?"
She brought a glass of water from the kitchen and set it by the bed. Grabbed a damp towel. She did what she'd read.
"Keep awake. Fluids. Call emergency if breathing stops."
She repeated it in her head like a broken instruction manual.
Keep awake… easier said than done.
"Lyra?" Hana shook her shoulder gently, voice tight. "Hey. Princess. Stay with me."
Lyra's eyelids fluttered weakly, opened with effort just a tiny crack. Her pupils were still tiny, lost in a sea of red, but at least she was responding.
"Where…?" Her voice was barely air.
"At my place. You knocked yourself out. Full Hana move, honestly."
A weak, barely noticeable smile pulled at Lyra's lips. A sign of life. A good sign.
"Drink." Hana held the glass to her mouth. Lyra managed a couple sips. Most spilled down her chin, but it was better than nothing.
"I'm… sorry," Lyra answered, almost inaudible.
"You scared the shit out of me…"
Hana let herself sink down, feeling the tight, cramped tension in her shoulders finally loosen. Lyra would make it. She was just out of it, not—
But why…? Why did you do that?
In the dim light, Hana watched Lyra's pale, vulnerable face. Without that usual cynical grin, she looked almost fragile.
Because of me? Because I just left? I should've just written a fucking note…
"I'm sorry," Hana whispered into the silence, words so quiet they were for nobody but herself.
"I'm so fucking sorry."
Hana stayed there, silently watching over Lyra's restless sleep.
⋯───⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯──⋱───⋯
Outside the apartment building, Asaki looked around.
Multiple entrances, typical prefab construction. She went to the neighboring building, where she found a window that offered a good view into the apartments across the way. Into Hana's apartment. She pressed a random buzzer.
"Yeah?" A tired voice answered.
"Excuse me, I think I got lost. Could you help me for a second?" Her voice sounded sweet.
The buzzer sounded.
Inside the stairwell, she searched for a window with a good angle. Second floor. Slightly elevated. Perfect.
She pressed herself to the glass and stared across. The lit window was only a few meters away. She could see everything.
Hana, sitting beside the bed. Lyra, lying there helplessly. How Hana gave her water, touched her, watched over her.
Asaki's breath fogged the glass. So close. She was so close to Hana, and yet...
Click.
Phone pressed to the window, she took photos through the glass. Not perfect, but clear enough.
Click.
Click.
"Excuse me, what are you doing here?"
Asaki spun around, startled. A middle-aged man in a flamingo bathrobe stood in his doorway, eyeing her suspiciously.
"Oh!" She smiled innocently. "I'm waiting for my friend. She lives in this building."
"Which friend?"
"Uh… Megumi? Megumi Morir?"
The man frowned. "No Megumi lives here."
"Oh no, then I must be in the wrong building." She giggled nervously. "Sorry!"
She hurried down the stairs, heart pounding wild. Outside, she leaned against the wall and scrolled through the photos.
Perfect. Hana nursing the unconscious Lyra.
She typed a new message to an unknown number:
"Interesting information about certain club girls available."
Her finger hovered over send. Not yet. Still too early.
But soon…
Asaki smiled into the darkness and vanished between the shadows. The manga would have to wait. She had something far more valuable now.