I was still smiling.
Actually... No. I was trying very hard not to smile.
Because every time I looked at Ethan...
My brain immediately replayed "He kissed you."
And then my face got warm all over again.
While he looks like, nothing happened. Like he hadn't just kissed me, like he hadn't just destroyed my thinking.
I was still starring at him when he looked back, of course he had that face, where he smiled.. softly.
I also smiled back, This guy.
I looked down at the bracelet. "...AIANA."
I snorted. "My identity has officially changed."
Ethan rubbed the back of his neck, looking genuinely embarrassed. "I noticed after I tied the last knot."
"You looked at my name every day for months."
"I did."
"..."
"...I don't have an excuse."
I laughed, covering my mouth with one hand, "You really don't."
"I'll make another one."
"No."
I closed my hand around the bracelet. "I'm keeping this one."
"You are?"
"It has character."
"...Character?"
"It tells a story."
"What story?"
"That my boyfriend can't spell."
He groaned, softly , "I'm never living this down."
"Nope."
"I regret everything."
"You should."
He sighed dramatically. "I knew I should've asked Mark."
"You definitely should've."
Before he could defend himself "AHEM."
A loud. Very intentional. Very judgmental.
AHEM.
Both of us turned. Nena stood a few steps away. Hands on her hips. One eyebrow raised.
Looking between Ethan... Me...
The flowers... The bracelet... Back to Ethan.
"...You." She pointed at him.
He blinked. "...Me?"
"Yes, you."
She walked over. Stopped right in front of him. Then looked him up... and down... like she was inspecting faulty furniture.
"Hmm."
Ethan looked at me. "...Help?"
I shrugged. "I've known her longer."
"Traitor."
Nena reached out. Placed one hand flat against Ethan's chest.
Then gently very gently pushed him backwards. "Excuse me."
He actually took two steps back. "...Excuse you?"
"My best friend."
She pointed at me proudly. "I booked her before you."
"I don't think that's how people work."
"It is today."
"Nena."
"No."
She looked at him again. "Personal conversation."
He raised both hands in surrender. "...Can I have her back?"
"We'll discuss visitation rights later."
Jake, who had been watching the entire thing from across the lawn, burst out laughing. "I'M ON HER SIDE!"
"Of course you are," Ethan muttered.
Nena grabbed my wrist. "C'mon."
"Nena, I'm literally wearing heels."
"You'll survive."
"I'm emotionally fragile."
"I know."
"So walk faster."
She dragged me away anyway.
She didn't stop until we reached one of the big trees near the edge of the school field.
The sounds from everyone else became quieter. Parents laughing.
Teachers talking. Someone calling students over for another photo.
It all faded into the background. Nena finally let go of my wrist.
I looked at her. She looked back.
Neither of us spoke. Which.... Was honestly terrifying. "...Nena?"
She opened her mouth. Closed it Looked away. "...This is stupid."
"What is?"
"I had a whole speech."
I blinked. "You practiced a speech?"
She looked offended. "Yes."
"You?"
"Don't make this harder."
"I'm sorry."
She sighed. "I even rehearsed it."
"You rehearsed?"
"Twice."
"..."
"...Three times."
I couldn't help laughing. She pointed at me. "See?"
"This is why I didn't want to do it."
"You've already ruined my emotional atmosphere."
"I'm trying!"
"No, you're laughing."
"You literally just admitted you rehearsed."
"I KNOW!"
She covered her face for a second. "I sound ridiculous."
"You sound adorable."
"Don't."
"I'm serious."
She sighed again. "...You're annoying."
"So are you."
"...Yeah."
Silence settled between us again. This time...
She didn't rush to fill it. She just stared at the graduation building. Students were everywhere. Taking pictures. Parents fixing gowns. Teachers saying goodbye.
After a while... She spoke. Very quietly.
"You know..." She smiled without looking at me. "I used to think we'd stay here forever."
I followed her gaze. "I know that's impossible."
She laughed once, "But... I still thought it."
"I thought we'd keep coming to this school."
"Sit in the cafeteria."
"Complain about homework."
"Watch Jake fail simple math."
"I did not fail!"
Jake shouted from somewhere across the field. Neither of us even looked.
Nena smiled. "I thought we'd always be together after class."
She finally turned toward me. "But now..."
She glanced around slowly. "Everyone's leaving."
"Different universities. Different schedules. Different lives."
She rubbed the back of her neck. "And I hate change."
I knew she did. She always pretended she didn't. But she did. A lot.
"I know we'll still talk." She shrugged. "I know you'll still answer my calls. You better."
"I will."
"I know we'll meet. But..." She laughed weakly. It won't be every morning anymore. No more you stealing my fries. You stole mine too. I deserved yours. You absolutely didn't."
She smiled.
Then... It slowly disappeared.
"When people ask me what the best part of high school was..." She looked straight at me. "It wasn't the trips. It wasn't winning anything. It wasn't even meeting Jake."
Jake clutched his chest dramatically in the distance "I'M HURT!"
She ignored him. "It was..." She swallowed. "...meeting you."
My throat tightened. "You've been my best friend for years, Aya."
"And..." She smiled through eyes that were beginning to shine. "I don't think I ever thanked you."
I stared at her. "For what?"
"For making school feel like home."
That one sentence... Hit harder than everything else. I stepped forward immediately. Wrapped my arms around her. She hugged me back just as tightly.
"...You're crying."
"I'm not."
"You sound watery."
"I sound beautiful."
"You sound like a leaking faucet."
She laughed. Right against my shoulder. "...Idiot."
"You love me."
"...Unfortunately."
"I'll take it."
We stayed like that until Jake yelled "ARE YOU TWO DONE?"
"No!"
Nena yelled back immediately. "GO AWAY!"
"...Okay! ...Love you!"
"I DON'T LOVE YOU!"
"...Liar!"
She rolled her eyes. But she was smiling again. And somehow... That made me smile too.
Jake finally wandered over, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"So..." He looked between us. "...Are you two done emotionally damaging each other?"
Nena wiped the corner of her eye immediately. "I don't know what you're talking about."
Jake looked at me. Then at her.
Then sighed dramatically. "...Girls."
"We're literally standing right here," I said.
"I know."
He nodded wisely. "Which is exactly why I said it."
Nena lightly elbowed him. He laughed.
Without thinking, he slipped an arm around her shoulders.
She complained for exactly three seconds. "...You're heavy."
"I'm comforting you."
"You're crushing me."
"It's called love."
"It's called back pain."
Jake grinned. "...Still cute though."
She rolled her eyes. "...Unfortunately."
He looked offended. "I got an unfortunately?"
"You'll survive."
"I don't think I will."
"You will."
"...Probably."
The two of them walked ahead, still bickering over absolutely nothing. I smiled to myself.
Some people really did have a talent for making everything lighter.
Before I could follow them A pair of hands clapped loudly.
Once.
Twice.
"Everyone!" Mr. Ronson's voice carried surprisingly well across the lawn.
Parents stopped talking.
Our group slowly turned toward him.
He stood beside Mrs. May, one hand in his pocket, looking around at all of us. There was that familiar smile on his face. The one he always wore whenever he looked at us.
Not just me. All of us. Like we were really his children.
He waited until everyone gathered closer.
Luca hurried over first. "What?"
"Food?"
"Please tell me it's food."
Mr. Ronson laughed. "It does involve food."
Luca gasped dramatically. "I'm listening."
Jake immediately stood beside him. "So am I."
Mrs. May covered a smile behind her hand. "I expected nothing less."
Mr. Ronson looked around once more.
His eyes lingered on Ethan for a second.
Then on me.
Then back to everyone else.
"I've been thinking."
Jake whispered to Liam, "...Every time he says that, my wallet gets scared."
Liam nodded solemnly. "Mine too."
"I heard both of you."
Mr. Ronson didn't even look their way.
Jake immediately straightened. "...Respectfully."
A few laughs escaped around us.
Mr. Ronson smiled before continuing.
"I know today is a day of celebration." He looked at the graduation building behind us. "You've all worked hard. You've all grown. And whether your results were exactly what you hoped for or not..."
His eyes met mine for a brief second. "...I'm proud of every single one of you."
Something warm settled in my chest. He continued.
"But..." He folded his arms. "We're about to lose someone."
Everyone instinctively looked at Ethan.
Ethan scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. "...Lose sounds dramatic."
Mrs. May smiled. "Travel."
"Travel," Mr. Ronson corrected with a chuckle.
"Before Ethan leaves for London..." He paused. "I'd like all of us to have one last night together."
Jake's eyes widened. "...Like... ...A party."
Silence. Then "YES!"
Luca practically jumped. "I KNEW IT WAS FOOD!"
Jake pointed at him. "Focus."
"I am focused."
"On food."
"Exactly."
Mrs. May laughed softly. "I'll take care of dinner."
Seraphine smiled. "I can help decorate."
Emma immediately raised her hand. "I'll help too."
Nena nodded. "I'll bring desserts."
Jake looked at her. "...Can you cook?"
"No."
"...Then?"
"I'll buy desserts."
"...Smart."
Mark adjusted his glasses. "I can help set everything up."
Liam raised his hand next. "I volunteer for music."
Jake immediately objected. "No."
"What?"
"You still listen to that playlist with goat sounds."
"It was experimental!"
"It was traumatic."
Emma laughed. "It really was."
Liam looked betrayed. "It had artistic value."
"It had livestock."
Even Mr. Ronson laughed at that. The conversation quickly turned into complete chaos. People talking over one another. Suggestions flying everywhere.
Cake.
Barbecue.
Games
Movies.
Photos.
Music.
Everything.
Mrs. May was already mentally planning the menu. "I'll make your favorite dishes."
Luca's head snapped toward her. "Mine?"
"Everyone's."
He placed both hands over his heart dramatically. "...Mom..."
She smiled warmly. "Yes?"
"I love you."
Jake frowned. "...He gets emotional over food."
"I get emotional over good people."
Mrs. May reached over and gently patted his cheek. "We love you too."
He beamed.
Watching them... It made me smile. Then... Almost without noticing...
Mr. Ronson spoke again.
"We'll do it before Ethan travels." My smile faltered. Just a little. There it was again.
Before Ethan travels.
It was only four words. Four ordinary words. But somehow...
They carried four years inside them.
Four years.
Four birthdays.
Four graduations.
Four rainy seasons.
Four years without seeing him whenever I wanted. Without hearing his motorcycle outside the mansion. Without him randomly showing up with drinks.
Without... Him.
The excitement around me suddenly felt farther away.
Like someone had quietly turned the volume down.
I stared at the bracelet around my wrist.My fingers traced the little beads AIANA.
I smiled faintly. Then sighed. "...You're thinking again."
Liam. Of course it was Liam. I looked up. He was staring at me with narrowed eyes.
Like some detective who had finally solved a mystery. "I wasn't."
"You were."
"I wasn't."
"You had your 'existential crisis face.'"
"...My what?"
"That face."
He pointed dramatically at me. "The one where you look like you're calculating the meaning of life."
Jake nodded immediately. "I know that face."
Emma blinked. "...She has a specific face?"
"Oh yeah," Jake said. "She does it every Tuesday."
"I do not."
"You absolutely do."
Liam suddenly gasped loudly. "Oh no."
Everyone looked at him. He pointed at Ethan.
Then at me. Then back at Ethan. "...I figured out the solution."
Ethan looked cautious already. "...Why do I feel threatened?"
Liam clapped his hands together. "You don't go to London."
"...That's your solution?"
"Yes."
"I have university."
"Skip it."
Jake nodded thoughtfully. "...Solid advice."
Mr. Ronson folded his arms. "You two would make terrible life coaches."
"We'd make entertaining ones," Jake corrected.
Liam wasn't finished.
He walked over to Ethan and placed both hands on his shoulders. "Listen."
"I'm listening."
"Simply tell London..." He paused dramatically. "...No."
Silence. Then Ethan laughed. Actually laughed.
The kind that made his shoulders shake. "Oh."
He wiped the corner of his eye. "Why didn't I think of that?"
"I know."
Liam nodded proudly. "I'm basically a genius."
Emma sighed, Intertwinning hands with Liam, "...He's impossible."
"But funny," I admitted.
She smiled. "...Unfortunately."
And just like that... The heaviness eased again.
Not completely. Maybe it never would. But enough.
Enough for me to laugh with them. Enough to enjoy today.
Because if there was one thing this ridiculous group had taught me... It was that even the saddest moments... Always seemed to find room for laughter.