The Ninja World Coalition headed for the Tsuchigumo clan in an extremely relaxed mood—out here "upholding justice" while also planning to make a nice profit on the side.
After all, the power gap was basically a dragon beating up goblins. There was no way they could lose.
On the other side, the Tsuchigumo clan were having a very different day.
Once they heard the coalition was coming for them, these clowns were collectively stunned at how insane the coalition was.
Like, sure, Tsuchigumo weren't saints. Every now and then, after a few drinks, they'd run their mouths about "conquering the world" and calling Uchiha Yorin "little brother" and all that.
But that was just talk. They weren't actually trying to fight—especially not trying to fight all of you at once.
Except now it looked like they didn't have a choice.
Because the coalition's accusation was… actually true.
They weren't "Saddam" getting framed.
They genuinely had a weapon of mass destruction—the so-called Fury.
Of course, it was basically just a giant natural-energy bomb. A last-ditch trump card, sure, but if they thought they could conquer the world with it, they were delusional.
So with a bit of time left before the coalition arrived, the Tsuchigumo clan gathered to discuss what to do.
And among them was a "guest" figure—a sort of retainer—Utakata, the Six-Tails Jinchūriki. He used to be a Kiri shinobi, but he'd defected because he couldn't stand Kirigakure's idiot policies.
He wore a loose kimono and carried a pipe, looking like a diva at first glance—but in reality Utakata's temperament was pretty noble.
And that "pipe" wasn't a pipe at all. It was his bubble tool… that also doubled as a weapon.
As for Tsuchigumo, he had exactly one evaluation:
rabble.
If he had to be more precise: super rabble.
Still—he'd lived with them for a while, and even "super rabble" was better than the old Mist Village.
He'd heard Kirigakure was doing well now under Mei's leadership.
He'd even sneered once:
"Less 'Mei's leadership' and more 'Mist grabbed Konoha's leg.' With Konoha backing you, even some random cat or dog could run Kirigakure."
But deep down, he still had a sliver of recognition for what Mist had become.
Only a sliver.
He couldn't go back.
Mist shinobi had come looking for him, trying to bring him home. Utakata thought about it, then refused.
No way.
A missing-nin doesn't just get to laugh it off.
Either you die, or you destroy the village. Missing-nin don't get a third option.
At least, that was how Utakata saw it.
"Tsuchigumo are idiots," he thought, "but they're still useful as a shield. As a buffer layer."
If possible, keeping the status quo was best—for him and for Tsuchigumo.
That was his plan.
He was going to urge the Tsuchigumo leader to surrender to the coalition and hand over the so-called doomsday weapon, Fury.
If they bowed low enough, apologized loudly enough, Uchiha Yorin—who still had to "keep his image"—probably wouldn't wipe them out completely.
Sure, Tsuchigumo might get sidelined and bullied later. But if they kept their heads down long enough, Yorin would eventually stop caring and re-absorb them into the new order.
Problem solved.
…It was a solid plan.
The key issue was: Utakata completely misjudged Tsuchigumo's personality—and the sheer, stupid scale of their arrogance.
After the initial panic, their discussion got more and more unhinged.
They started saying things like: sure, the coalition looks scary, but it's "probably overrated." Tsuchigumo should just solo the coalition, show them how strong they are, then negotiate from a position of strength.
If the coalition "witnessed Tsuchigumo's might," they'd be too scared to underestimate them. Then Tsuchigumo could demand better, more favorable terms.
As soon as that idea hit the table, the Tsuchigumo elders started getting hyped out of their minds.
Imagining their "bravery" shaking the supposedly unstoppable coalition made them high as a kite.
Some even began fantasizing: if Tsuchigumo could beat the coalition—or even just fight them to a draw—that would prove the coalition wasn't all that.
And if the great villages were this soft despite all the spoils they'd claimed, then other factions would rise too—more groups like Tsuchigumo, challenging the coalition.
Like the most famous rogue group right now: Akatsuki.
Then the coalition's dominance would collapse under endless rebellions.
Tsuchigumo would become famous, gain support, get resources, tech, territory, mission shares—
Maybe they couldn't conquer the whole world, but they could become a regional powerhouse. No more living like backwater hillbillies.
Utakata: "..."
Watching them get more excited by the second, Utakata was genuinely speechless.
What the hell.
"Fight the coalition to a draw"?
Should I praise you for being modest, since you're not even claiming you can win without help from every rebel group in existence?
No. That's not modest.
That's just brain damage.
What was wrong with these people?
Why were they hallucinating that they could go 50–50 with the coalition?
They wouldn't even need Uchiha Yorin. Any random Kage-level fighter could massacre these idiots by themselves.
At that point, Utakata almost laughed out of pure disbelief.
He lost all interest in persuading them.
They were too far gone. They weren't going to listen to a missing-nin anyway.
His only thought became:
Stay away from me. Don't splash your blood on me when you die.
And yet these geniuses kept staring at him with shining eyes.
Like their internal hype circle wasn't enough—they wanted Utakata, an outsider, to join in so they could get even more high together.
Utakata didn't indulge them for even one second.
At this point, he felt insulted.
Were they seriously not taking him seriously?
He was a Jinchūriki. In the original timeline, Pain had to personally take him down. Later, Obito even treated him as high-value material.
And now these clowns thought they could treat him like a joke?
Utakata genuinely laughed—coldly.
Tsuchigumo were doomed.
So there was no need to be polite anymore.
He said exactly what he meant:
"Rabble."
"…Huh?"
The Tsuchigumo idiots were so deep in fantasy that they didn't even process it at first.
Then confusion turned into anger.
What the hell did you just call us?!
In their minds, there was only one explanation:
He's a coalition spy. Kill him first!
So they rushed him in a screaming wave, trying to dogpile him—
Utakata opened up and beat them into the dirt, then withdrew calmly.
Tsuchigumo talked big, but they were like the now-extinct Kaguya clan: reputation vastly larger than actual strength.
Unless they were willing to detonate Fury and die with him, they were not beating a Jinchūriki.
Utakata still held back.
He wasn't here to die with these lunatics. He just wanted to insult them and leave.
Forcing them into using Fury would be catastrophic.
…
After Utakata left, Tsuchigumo raged and flailed:
"Damn it! Damn it!!"
"The coalition sent a spy!"
"Curse Utakata—after we trusted him!"
But Utakata didn't care.
Because on the road out, he ran into two people:
One was Kirigakure's current boss—Mei Terumī—now dressed like a proper little wife, clinging sweetly to Uchiha Yorin's arm.
The other, of course, was Uchiha Yorin.
"You came," Utakata said. "So this was under your watch the whole time."
His eyes flicked to Mei first, instinctively.
Then he looked Yorin in the eye and spoke in a low voice:
"You saw what happened back there. I've cut ties with Tsuchigumo. I'm not getting involved in whatever you're doing with them. Let me go."