Jay-Jay's POV
My legs are still trembling.
Rooftop air still clings to my skin—cold, sharp, humiliating. I keep telling myself I'm fine, that I can breathe, that I'm not falling apart again, but each step back toward my office feels like walking through wet cement.
Coel stays beside me the entire time, close enough that our shoulders brush. Protective. Quiet. Watching me like I might shatter if someone exhales too loudly.
And then there's Samy.
Who should've been quiet.
Who should've respected the moment.
Who absolutely did not.
She leans in with the worst whisper known to mankind and says—no, announces:
"If Keifer shows up again, I swear my ovaries are gonna file harassment charges."
I choke.
Coel groans.
"Samy, stop," he mutters.
"What? I'm just stating facts. The man looks like sin in a suit. A lawsuit waiting to happen. MY lawsuit."
I try not to smile.
I fail.
But it dies instantly when we turn the hallway corner.
Because he's already there.
Leaning against the wall like some marble sculpture carved purely to ruin my life.
Keifer.
His head lifts the second he senses movement.
And his eyes—his eyes go straight to me.
Not to Coel.
Not to Samy.
Just me.
Like I'm the only person oxygen bothers to exist for.
My breath leaves my lungs so fast it feels like he punched the air out of me.
Samy, of course, chooses violence.
"OH LORD HE'S SERVED. SOMEONE TAKE ME— I MEAN TAKE JAY, SORRY."
I want to die.
Coel's hand rises like he's about to slap a restraining order across her mouth.
"Samy—"
"WHAT? I am providing emotional support! Also, visual appreciation!"
Keifer doesn't even blink at her commentary.
His eyes stay locked on me.
And slowly—too slowly—he pushes off the wall and begins walking toward me.
Keifer's POV
She looks like she's been crying.
That alone nearly knocks me out.
Her eyes are swollen, her breathing uneven, shoulders tight and small like she's trying to hide inside herself. And she never hides. Not from anyone.
Except me.
Now.
I don't look at Coel.
I don't look at Samy.
I just walk toward her and say the only thing my mouth is capable of forming:
"Jay."
Her breath catches.
Her body shifts backward on instinct.
And something in my chest cracks so hard I feel it echo in my ribs.
She tries to dart around me—
So I step in front of her.
Not touching.
Not trapping.
Just blocking her path.
Gently.
Firmly.
Desperately.
Coel instantly moves closer, protective.
Of her.
Not from me.
And yet… that's exactly what it feels like.
"Keifer," he warns.
I lift a hand slightly, not toward him—toward her.
"I'm not leaving without talking to you."
She shakes her head, voice barely a sound.
"Keifer… please."
God.
Her voice.
Her trembling.
It guts me.
Samy, the menace of the universe, mutters behind them:
"Damn, he said that like he's about to rail you against this wall."
"SAMY!" Coel snaps.
Samy raises her hands.
"What? I'm narrating the scene!"
Jay's cheeks flush—pink, soft, panicked.
Mine burn for an entirely different reason.
But I force myself to breathe.
To lower my voice.
To soften the edges she's terrified of touching.
"Jay… give me ten minutes."
She looks away.
I take one small step closer—carefully.
"If you don't… I'll spend the whole night outside your office door."
Samy gasps like I just proposed marriage and a joint mortgage.
Coel stares like he's assessing whether punching me is legally justifiable.
But Jay…
Jay freezes.
Swallows.
And whispers—
"Fine. Ten minutes."
I exhale so hard my knees almost give out.
Coel's POV
I swear, if this hallway had a support beam, I'd bang both their heads into it just to knock some sense in.
Jay's trembling again.
Keifer's chest is rising like he just sprinted a marathon.
Samy is muttering something about "premium man-meat tension."
And I'm… stuck.
Between wanting to shield Jay
and wanting to drag Keifer into a room and yell at him to fix whatever crack he put in her.
His eyes stay glued to her.
Her eyes stay everywhere but on him.
And every part of me is screaming:
She isn't ready.
She isn't okay.
And you're pushing too hard, Keifer.
But then she whispers "Fine."
And I watch Keifer's entire body breathe like she just handed him oxygen after drowning for days.
I want to be angry.
But I'm scared.
Because she's scared.
And she's pretending she isn't.
Samy's POV
Okay.
As the only sane person here—
…Fine, not sane.
But the only one with working vision—
I need to state the obvious:
THIS IS THE HOTTEST TENSION I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.
Jay is shaking like a leaf caught in a love triangle storm.
Keifer looks like he wants to push her against a wall and declare war on every man who ever breathed her air.
Coel looks like he's debating whether to fight Keifer, fight Jay, or fight God.
And me?
I'm enjoying the show.
And also incredibly concerned.
And also incredibly turned on.
Multitasking queen.
But when Jay whispers "Fine," I actually clutch my chest dramatically.
Because romance?
Raw emotion?
Trauma?
Healing?
Dominant energy?
Ten-minute ultimatums?
THIS IS CINEMA.
Jay-Jay's POV
Ten minutes.
I shouldn't have said it.
But my voice betrayed me.
My chest betrayed me.
My stupid heart betrayed me.
And Keifer…
Keifer hears the word "Fine" like it's salvation.
His shoulders drop.
His jaw unclenches.
His eyes—those dark, warm, terrifying eyes—soften.
He stands a little taller.
Not dominant.
Not possessive.
Just…
Relieved.
"Thank you," he murmurs.
It almost breaks me.
Coel touches my arm, grounding me.
Samy makes some noise like she's watching a forbidden romance trailer.
Keifer steps back—not leaving, just giving me space—and gestures lightly toward the quiet hallway behind him.
Not demanding.
Not controlling.
Just waiting.
I nod weakly, feeling my lungs collapse in slow motion.
This is a mistake.
This is needed.
This is terrifying.
This is inevitable.
Keifer's POV
She said yes.
She actually said yes.
She's terrified—her body is practically broadcasting panic—but she didn't run. She didn't shut me out completely. She didn't say no.
That's more hope than I've had in weeks.
I step back, hands visible, paced slow, because the last thing I want is to spook her more than she already is.
She whispers, "Ten minutes," like the words cost her something.
Maybe they did.
Maybe everything with her has always cost her more than she lets on.
But now?
Now I'll take my ten minutes and use them to get her back—
No.
To understand her.
To stop whatever is hurting her.
Even if it's me.
Especially if it's me.
Coel's POV
Jay is breathing too fast.
Keifer is breathing too slow.
Samy is whispering something about "forbidden hallway confessions and office-wall pinning."
And I'm seconds away from dragging Jay to my office again—but she touches my wrist and shakes her head.
"I'm okay," she whispers.
She isn't.
Not even close.
But she wants this.
Or needs this.
Or both.
So I step back.
I stay close.
But I let her walk toward Keifer.
It feels like handing a wounded bird to a man with big hands.
A man who loves her.
A man who might break her more.
A man who might fix her, too.
I don't trust him.
But I trust the way he looks at her.
Like he'd set himself on fire if she asked.
Samy's POV
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD—
Jay is walking toward Keifer.
Keifer is standing there like: "Yes, my love, ruin me."
Coel is brooding so hard I think he's generating his own weather system.
I whisper:
"If he looks at me like that, I'm leaving my job, my family, my future, and my skincare routine."
Coel pinches the bridge of his nose.
Jay shoots me a look.
But I see it.
Her lips almost twitch.
Which means my job as Emotional Support Agent is complete.
Jay-Jay's POV
Keifer stands still as I approach.
Not moving.
Not grabbing.
Not dominating the space.
Just… waiting.
"Where?" I ask quietly.
"Wherever you want," he says.
My heart stutters.
So I point toward the far end of the hallway—quiet, empty.
He nods.
And for the first time since this day began, I see something in his eyes that isn't tension or hurt or anger.
I see patience.
And fear.
And longing.
And it hits me—
He's just as scared as I am.
We stop at a distance that's both too close and too far.
He opens his mouth—
Then closes it.
Then tries again, voice hoarse:
"Jay… please don't look at me like you're expecting me to break you."
I swallow.
"Then don't look at me like you're expecting me to save you."
His breath stutters.
Mine stops.
The hallway feels too small.
My chest feels too tight.
"Just talk," I whisper.
He nods slowly.
And then says the softest thing I've heard from him in weeks—
"I miss you."
My vision blurs.
But I stand still.
Because if I move, I will break.
Keifer's POV
She's crying again.
Not visibly.
Not dramatically.
But her eyes.
Her trembling.
Her silence.
It kills me.
I take a small step forward.
She immediately steps back.
My heart drops.
But I force myself to stop.
To stay exactly where she needs me.
Ten minutes.
Ten minutes to not ruin this.
So I inhale.
And begin.
But not with the words I planned.
Not with anger.
Not with accusations.
Just—
"Tell me what I did wrong. I'll fix it. Even if I have to learn how to breathe differently."
Her mouth parts.
Her lashes flutter.
Her throat works through a swallow that looks painful.
"I can't," she whispers.
My chest caves in.
"Jay—"
"I can't," she repeats, voice cracking.
And suddenly all the things I want to say tangle together.
All the things I feel choke me.
All the things I fear drown me.
I clench my fists at my sides.
Then let them go.
Then say what I've been terrified of admitting:
"I'm not leaving you."
Her breath breaks—
And the world breaks with it.
Coel's POV
I can't hear their words.
But I can see everything.
Her trembling.
His desperation.
Their distance.
Their ache.
This isn't lust.
This isn't tension.
This is two wounded souls circling each other like every step is a landmine.
I want to rush in.
Stop it.
Save her.
But I can't.
This is hers.
This is theirs.
And all I can do is stand here, beside Samy, praying she doesn't blow the moment.
Samy's POV
"Oh," I whisper softly.
Coel looks at me like he expects chaos.
But for once, I'm not making jokes.
"Oh," I repeat.
Because this is different.
Jay isn't scared of Keifer.
She's scared of herself.
And he…
He looks like he'd kneel in glass if she asked.
This is bigger than flirting and trauma and office-wall fantasies.
This is heartbreak.
Real.
Raw.
Messy.
I squeeze Coel's arm.
He doesn't pull away.
Jay-Jay's POV
There's no oxygen.
Just him.
Just me.
Just the ten minutes I wish I hadn't agreed to.
He whispers, voice shaking:
"Jay… if you tell me you're done with me, I'll walk away. I'll bleed. I'll break. But I'll walk."
My chest caves.
"But if you're scared…
if you're hurting…
if you're pushing me away because of something you think I can't handle…"
He steps closer—just half a step.
Enough for warmth.
Not enough for touch.
"…then I'm not going anywhere."
Tears finally fall.
Soft.
Silent.
Uncontrollable.
He watches one drop hit the floor.
And his expression fractures.
"Jay…"
I shake my head, breaking apart.
"I don't know how to do this."
He whispers:
"Then let me learn with you."
My knees nearly buckle.
Keifer's POV
She's crying.
I want to hold her.
I can't.
So I whisper the only thing that keeps me from losing my mind:
"Ten minutes… or a lifetime. I'll take whatever you give me."
She covers her mouth.
She looks away.
She whispers:
"I'm scared."
I whisper back:
"Me too."
And for the first time…
She doesn't run.
Jay-Jay's POV
The moment Keifer closes the office door behind us, I swear the air turns solid.
The soft click might as well be a trap snapping shut.
I back up so fast I hit the edge of my desk.
Keifer doesn't move at first. He just… stands there. Broad shoulders rising and falling, jaw tense, eyes locked onto me like he's trying to memorize every frightened breath I take.
"Jay."
His voice is too soft. Too deep. Too much.
I squeeze my fingers together so he won't notice the shaking.
Bad idea.
He notices everything.
His eyes flick down, and something in his expression breaks.
"Why are you avoiding me?"
"I'm not."
It sounds like a mosquito whispering.
His head tilts. "Jay."
I stare at a random corner of my office—literally the top hinge of the cabinet door—like maybe if I stare long enough, I'll disappear.
"Look at me."
I can't.
I can't.
Samy's POV (muffled)
Rustling. A thump. Samy hissing at Coel.
Samy: "I am putting my entire soul into listening right now."
Coel: "Get away from the door."
Samy: "No. This is my Super Bowl."
Keifer's POV
She won't even lift her eyes.
And that hurts more than I want to admit.
Not the rejection.
Not the distance.
The fear.
Hers.
Of me.
"Jay," I say again, quieter. "Tell me what I did."
"You didn't do anything."
Lies. She's terrible at them.
I step toward her—slow, careful, deliberate—so she can stop me if she wants. Her breathing stutters. Her back presses harder against the desk.
Her hands are trembling.
"Jay…" I reach toward her elbow—
But stop.
I hover, inches away, waiting for her. "Can I?"
She whispers: "Don't touch me."
It hits like a punch.
The kind that knocks the wind out of you.
But I don't move back.
I just drop my hand.
"Okay," I whisper, even though it feels like swallowing a shard of glass. "I won't."
Samy's POV
Samy (whisper-shouting): "OH GREAT, NOW IT'S ANGST. THIS IS LIKE WATCHING A LIVE-ACTION FANFICTION."
Coel: "Samy. Please."
Samy: "For the record, if they start kissing, I'm breaking in."
Coel: "Why?"
Samy: "SCIENCE, COEL. HYDRATION. PUBLIC HEALTH."
Coel: "…None of that relates."
Samy: "Don't question my methods!"
Jay-Jay's POV
I want to scream at Samy.
I want to crawl into my desk and turn into a USB drive.
But Keifer… he's still watching me.
Not angry.
Not impatient.
Just hurting.
Quietly.
"I need you to talk to me," he says. "I'm not leaving without knowing why you're running away."
My voice barely forms. "Keifer… please—"
He steps forward—not touching, not cornering—just closing the emotional distance like it's killing him.
His throat works before he speaks again.
"You kissed me in the elevator."
Heat floods my face so violently I'm surprised I don't catch fire.
"And then you ran," he says, softer. "You ran like I burned you."
Samy's POV
Samy: "BE HONEST, JAY! HIS TONGUE TECHNIQUE IS PROBABLY ILLEGAL IN THREE COUNTRIES—"
Jay (inside, screaming): "SAMY STOP TALKING!"
Coel: "SAMY STOP BREATHING NEAR THIS DOOR."
Samy: "I CAN'T. I'M INVESTED."
Keifer's POV
Jay's face flares red—adorably, painfully.
And despite myself—despite everything—
a small, broken laugh escapes me.
God, she's killing me.
She's twisting me up, confusing me, terrifying me—
And I still want her more than air.
I step closer again.
Just enough that she can feel the heat off my body.
Not touching.
Not pinning her.
Just… there.
"Jay," I murmur, "look at me."
"I can't," she whispers.
"Why not?"
Silence.
Her fingers press into the edge of the desk, knuckles white.
"Tell me why you're afraid of me."
"I'm not—"
"Don't lie to me."
My voice cracks. "Not about this."
Her breathing stumbles again.
Jay-Jay's POV
He's too close.
Too warm.
Too intense.
Every cell in my body remembers the elevator—
the way he kissed me like he was trying to breathe me in.
I swallow so hard it hurts.
"I can't," I repeat.
Keifer's eyes soften in slow motion. The anger is gone. The frustration is gone.
All that's left is… desperation.
"Jay," he whispers, "please. I'm trying so hard not to push you. But you're breaking me."
My heart clenches.
I look at him—
And instantly regret it.
Because his eyes… oh God.
They're raw. Wide. Beautiful. Terrified.
And full of me.
Samy's POV
Samy, muffled snort: "If his voice gets any deeper, my reproductive system is filing paperwork."
Coel: "STOP."
Samy: "YOU STOP. I'M GRIEVING. I DON'T KNOW WHAT FOR BUT I AM."
Keifer's POV
Her eyes finally meet mine.
For one second.
One precious second.
Then she looks away.
"Jay… please tell me the truth."
She shakes, barely audible:
"I can't."
I hold myself still.
Perfectly still.
Because if I touch her—
if I so much as brush her skin—
I'm going to lose every ounce of restraint I have left.
So I keep my hands at my sides.
But my voice breaks without permission.
"Then at least tell me this," I whisper.
"Did you regret kissing me?"
Her head snaps up.
"No."
The word bursts out of her like she's been holding it in her mouth for days.
She freezes immediately, horrified.
But it's too late.
I heard it.
And something inside my chest erupts.
Jay-Jay's POV
I messed up.
I wasn't supposed to say that.
I wasn't supposed to feel that.
And definitely not admit it.
Keifer steps closer—too close—close enough that my knees go liquid.
His breath grazes my forehead.
Not touching.
Not pushing.
Just there. Torturously there.
His voice drops to a sinful whisper.
"Then tell me why you're running."
"I can't," I whisper again, tears burning the backs of my eyes.
"Jay…"
"I CAN'T, KEIFER!"
It comes out louder than I expect.
He goes still.
Completely, painfully still.
I'm panting. My hands are shaking so much I grip my own arms.
He watches me with devastated softness.
"Okay," he murmurs. "Okay. I won't force you."
His voice sounds like something inside him has cracked open.
Samy's POV
Samy: "Oh my God, the tension. I can TASTE IT through the door. It's like erotic depression."
Coel: "Those words should never be near each other."
Samy: "Neither should your face and peace but here we are."
Keifer's POV
I take a breath.
Then another.
Then I speak the words that feel like bleeding.
"Give me ten minutes."
Jay looks up, startled.
"If you don't want that, tell me. But if you don't say no, then—"
Outside, Samy shrieks:
"GIVE HIM TEN MINUTES, JAY! THAT MAN COULD FIX THE ECONOMY WITH WHAT HE'S PACKING!"
Coel: "SAMY—MY GOD."
Jay whimpers, "SAMY PLEASE SHUT UP!"
I can't help it.
My lips twitch.
Just once.
I drop my voice, letting every ounce of emotion bleed into it.
"Jay," I say softly.
"If you don't give me those ten minutes… I will spend all night outside your office door."
Her breath stutters.
She looks at me—
And something inside her collapses.
Her voice trembles:
"Fine."
That one word knocks all the air out of me.
"Ten minutes," she whispers.
I inhale like I've been underwater.
Samy's POV
Samy: "OH THANK GOD. NOW DO SOMETHING STUPID AND ROMANTIC SO I CAN LIVE THROUGH YOU."
Coel: "SAMY, SIT DOWN."
Samy: "I CAN'T FEEL MY LEGS."
Jay-Jay's POV
Keifer just…
stares at me.
Like I've handed him the universe.
But also like he's terrified he'll drop it.
His chest rises, falls, rises again.
"Thank you," he whispers.
I look away, because the way he's looking at me—
It's too much.
Everything is too much.
But I meant it.
Ten minutes.
Even though I'm scared.
Even though I'm shaking.
Even though I know this will break me.
I nod once.
Keifer exhales, voice cracked.
"Jay… we're going to figure this out."
Keifer's POV
She said yes.
Not to me.
Not yet.
But to the truth.
To the conversation I've been begging for.
I don't touch her.
I don't dare.
But I take one step closer, so she knows I'm here.
So she knows I'm not leaving her again.
Not unless she throws me out.
"Ten minutes," she repeats.
I nod, swallowing hard.
This is my chance.
My only chance.
And I'm not wasting a second of it.
Jay-Jay's POV
I swear my soul wasn't built for this level of humiliation.
My hands were already trembling before Samy decided to turn her chaos meter to apocalyptic, but now? Now I'm standing in my own office, chest tight, breath all uneven, and Keifer looking at me like I'm the only thing keeping his world upright.
And then—
Samy's voice blasts through the door.
"JAY-JAY JUST TELL HIM YOU WANT TO RIDE THAT MAN LIKE A MOTORBIKE!"
I choke so hard my lungs almost leave the building.
"SAMY!" I scream, voice cracking like cheap pottery.
Keifer—who is standing less than a meter away—makes a sound so strangled I briefly consider calling an ambulance. He looks like someone just slapped him with a holy scripture and a porno at the same time.
Outside, Coel groans.
Then, footsteps.
Then the sound of Coel physically dragging Samy away while she kicks and screams like a feral toddler.
"Coel—LET ME BE THE THERAPIST THEY DIDN'T ASK FOR!"
Dear God.
I pinch the bridge of my nose.
Keifer's voice is hoarse when he finally speaks.
"Jay… please tell me that isn't actually what you—"
"NO," I snap instantly, "and stop talking."
His lips twitch. He's trying not to laugh.
Which is ridiculous because I'm dying.
Actually dying.
Keifer's POV
I shouldn't find this cute.
I shouldn't.
But Jay—blushing, flustered, furious Jay—covering her face while Samy screams sins through the door?
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm gone for her.
Fully gone.
Jay-Jay's POV
I turn away from him so he won't see my face heating like a stove.
But he sees everything.
He always does.
"Jay," he murmurs, voice low enough to skim along my spine, "look at me."
"No."
"Jay."
I keep staring at the floor like it holds the answers to life.
He takes a step toward me. Slow. Heavy. Intentional.
The air changes—sweet heavens, I feel it.
It turns warm, sharp, electric.
He steps into my space without even touching me, and my heartbeat jumps like it just skipped a grade.
My throat tightens.
My palms sweat.
My mind? Gone. Buried. Dead.
Keifer whispers, "You're shaking again."
"I'm fine."
"You're not."
"I am."
"Jay…"
His voice drops.
"…don't lie to me."
I hate how gentle he sounds.
I hate how much it cracks something inside me.
I step back instinctively.
He notices.
Of course he notices.
His jaw flexes—a soft, pained movement.
Outside the door, Samy yells again.
"ARE THEY KISSING YET?"
Coel sounds exhausted.
"No."
"THEN THEY'RE DOING IT WRONG!"
I let out a noise somewhere between a squeak and a prayer for death.
Keifer tilts his head, trying not to smile.
"Should we… tell them to go home?"
"Please," I whisper. "Before she starts giving us… instructions."
He actually laughs.
A real one.
But it's short—almost broken. Like he hasn't laughed properly in months.
Then he takes another step toward me.
And my breath leaves my body entirely.
Keifer's POV
She's terrified.
Not of me.
Of herself.
Of her reaction to me.
Of the way she looks at me like she feels everything I'm feeling, but she'd rather swallow her own heart before admitting it.
And her hands—
God, her hands.
They're trembling like she's barely holding herself together.
"Jay," I say quietly, "tell me what you're not telling me."
Jay-Jay's POV
I turn away, pacing because if he keeps looking at me like that I'm going to crumble.
"I can't do this right now," I whisper.
"Why not?"
"Because—" My voice cracks. "Because you're pushing."
"I'm not pushing," he says gently, following me with steady steps. "I'm holding you accountable."
"For what?"
"For acting like you don't feel what I feel."
I freeze.
Completely.
Fully.
Every nerve in my body locking in place.
It hits like a hot slap—a truth I've been running from so aggressively I might as well be training for the Olympics.
"I don't feel—"
He cuts me off with a look so sharp it slices the lie in half.
"Jay… you kissed me."
I squeeze my eyes shut.
He continues, voice low and steady.
"You kissed me in the elevator. You held my shirt like you didn't want to let go. You looked at me like you—"
"STOP."
It comes out harsher than I planned.
He stops talking.
But he doesn't step back.
He waits.
Silent.
Watching me fall apart.
Seeing everything I'm trying to hide.
I walk away from him.
He follows.
"Jay."
"Don't," I warn.
"Jay."
"I said don't!"
He stops.
Slowly.
Carefully.
Not because he's scared I'll yell again—
but because he sees my breathing slipping into panic.
His voice softens into something almost painful.
"I'll stop when you stop running from me."
"I'm not running," I whisper.
"Then why," he asks, "do you look like you're about to fall apart if I touch you?"
I swallow so hard it hurts.
He takes a step back.
Like he's forcing himself to.
Like it's breaking him.
Then, quietly—
"Tell me what you need from me."
I try to speak but nothing comes.
He waits.
His eyes—God, his eyes—are full of worry and frustration and something painfully close to devotion.
My lips tremble.
My chest tightens.
And I break.
"Space," I whisper.
Everything in him stills.
His shoulders stiffen.
His jaw locks.
His breath stutters.
But he nods.
Even though it looks like the nod physically hurts him.
"Okay," he whispers. "If that's what you need… okay."
The room goes silent.
My heartbeat is too loud.
My breath too unsteady.
Outside, Samy's muffled shriek breaks the tension:
"COEL, THEY ARE EITHER KILLING EACH OTHER OR ABOUT TO MAKE BABIES—WE NEED EVIDENCE!"
"Oh my god," I mutter into my hands.
Keifer's lips twitch painfully.
He looks devastated and fond at the same time.
I whisper, "Samy is not helping."
He murmurs, "She absolutely thinks she is."
Another silence.
We stare at each other.
Not touching.
Not moving.
Just… standing in everything we're both too scared to say.
My voice finally slips out—small, raw.
"Keifer… please don't make this harder."
He inhales slowly, shakily.
"I'm not trying to make it harder," he murmurs.
"I'm trying to understand."
His eyes soften in a way that almost breaks me again.
"Jay… what are you so afraid of?"
I flinch.
He sees it.
Of course he sees it.
He steps back again, giving me even more space, even though every line in his body screams he wants the opposite.
His voice drops—soft, pained.
"Tell me what you need. I'll do it."
I whisper the same word again.
"Space."
He nods.
Again.
Smaller this time.
Quieter.
More defeated.
But he respects it.
He always does.
Even when it hurts him.
He steps toward the door.
My throat closes at the sight.
Right as he reaches for the handle—
Samy shrieks again from the hallway:
"ARE YOU TWO DONE OR SHOULD I ORDER A MATTRESS?"
I grab my face.
Keifer lets out the softest, most miserable laugh.
Then, before leaving, he says one last thing.
"Jay… I'm not giving up."
And then he walks out.
Leaving me with shaking hands, a splitting heartbeat, and a truth I'm not ready to face.
Coel's POV
The moment the office door clicked shut behind Jay and Keifer, I knew—
I was not emotionally built for this.
Samy paced like a gremlin in heat, muttering curses and thirst-prayers under her breath. My pulse already felt like a migraine.
She stopped suddenly and pressed her ear against the door.
I groaned.
"Samy. Please don't do that."
She flicked her hand at me. "Hush, Coel. Science is happening."
Samy's POV
Look.
If two emotionally constipated people are locked in a room together after weeks of slow-burn eye sex, I will investigate.
I squished my ear to the door harder.
"They're too quiet," I whispered. "Either they're hugging or glaring, and honestly both scenarios are turning me on."
Coel rubbed his face.
"I don't… why would that turn you on?"
"Because I'm alive, Coel. And observant. And slightly dehydrated. Want a list?"
"No."
"Too late. Exhibit A—Keifer's voice has bass. Exhibit B—Jay is emotionally unstable. Exhibit C—PENT-UP TENSION."
Coel groaned like an old man. Music to my ears.
Coel's POV
I tried to pull her away from the door.
"Samy, give them privacy."
She slapped my hand away.
"No. I am the emotional ambulance waiting outside. If something collapses in there, I'm the first responder."
"You are the opposite of medical care."
"That is true," she admitted proudly.
Inside, their voices rose—Jay sounded stressed, Keifer sounded frustrated but soft. I hated how audible Jay's shaking had become. It made my stomach twist.
"What do you think he's saying?" Samy whispered.
"Something stupid," I muttered.
"And heartfelt."
"Damn. Hot."
I closed my eyes.
This woman was exhausting.
Samy's POV
Okay, real talk?
I was nervous too.
Jay wasn't okay on the rooftop. I'd never seen her fold like that. She shook like she was freezing from the inside out.
So yeah, I made jokes. That's how I cope. That's how I breathe.
But hearing her voice crack inside the room?
Not fun.
Coel stared at the floor like he was replaying every possible worst-case scenario.
I nudged him with my elbow.
"You okay, Mom?"
He glared.
"I'm not your mother."
"Oh? You nag like one."
"I'm TRYING to help."
"I know," I said quietly. "That's why it's cute."
He froze.
I smirked.
You're welcome, Coel.
Coel's POV
I didn't like how quiet the office got.
I didn't like how I could almost hear Jay's uneven breathing.
And then—
Keifer's voice dropped low, barely audible through the door.
Samy gasped dramatically.
"Oh. My. GOD. Did you hear that tone? That's the 'I'm about to emotionally undress you' tone."
I sighed.
"We shouldn't be listening."
"You're right," she said… and leaned closer.
I considered kicking her.
Samy's POV
I couldn't help it.
This was BL romance in 4K and I didn't have popcorn.
Then Jay's voice broke again, and—
Okay.
My chest hurt.
I nudged Coel.
"She's scared."
He nodded without looking up.
"I know."
"And he… he actually sounds like he's trying."
"He is."
We stared at each other.
And for one strange heartbeat, we understood each other perfectly.
We were both worried for her.
Just… in very different flavors.
Mine was stress-horny.
His was actual emotional maturity.
Gross.
Coel's POV
Then it happened.
Inside, Keifer said something low—too low to make out.
But Jay's voice came out strangled:
"Don't push me."
Samy slapped a hand over her mouth.
And then she lost all restraint.
She cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled through the door—
Samy's POV
"JAY-JAY JUST TELL HIM YOU WANT TO RIDE THAT MAN LIKE A MOTORBIKE!"
It echoed down the hallway like a sin being broadcast on FM radio.
Coel: "SAMY!"
Me: "WHAT?! I'M HELPING."
Inside, something crashed. Probably Keifer's soul.
Coel's POV
I grabbed Samy by the hoodie like she was a rebellious cat.
"NO MORE TALKING," I said firmly.
"You can't silence an artist, Coel!"
"You're not an artist."
"I am a therapist of chaos," she declared proudly.
I dragged her further down the hallway, away from the door.
She fought me like a toddler in a supermarket.
"I HAVE WISDOM TO SHARE—"
"No, you don't."
"THEY NEED MY GUIDANCE—"
"They do not."
"I AM THE SPICE IN THIS CURRY—"
"You are the choking hazard in this curry."
She gasped.
"Rude. But fair."
Samy's POV
Coel finally pinned me against the opposite wall like some frustrated schoolteacher trying to stop a fire drill.
"You have to stop interfering," he said, breathless.
"But they need support!"
"NO. They need privacy."
"But what if—"
"Samy," he said, lowering his voice, "Jay is breaking."
I stopped.
That did it.
That one line.
I nodded slowly.
"…Okay."
Coel looked relieved.
For exactly two seconds.
Because then I added:
"But if they start kissing again, I'm kicking the door."
He groaned so loud the floor vibrated.
Coel's POV
I stared at the door.
At the thin piece of wood separating Jay from a man who could break her or save her.
And I whispered, mostly to myself:
"Please… don't let him hurt her again."
Samy softened for once.
"Coel?"
"Yeah?"
"If he hurts her… I'll kill him first. You can help bury the body."
I snorted despite myself.
"Deal."
We stood guard.
Two idiots.
But two idiots who cared about her more than anything else.
Samy's POV
Look, I joke.
I flirt.
I talk like a walking HR violation.
But Jay?
She's my girl.
My heart.
My favorite headache.
And if Keifer wants her back?
He's gonna have to fight her demons—
and maybe also fight me.
I'm small, but I bite.
Coel's POV
Inside, Jay's muffled voice trembled.
Keifer murmured something soft and aching.
I crossed my arms and whispered to the door—
"If you love her…
Prove it."
Because if he doesn't?
I will never let him close enough to hurt her again.
I should've known Samy wouldn't stay quiet for more than ten seconds.
The moment I drag her farther down the hallway—far enough that Jay won't hear her insane commentary—she's already wriggling under my grip like a feral cat hyped on espresso.
"Coel," she hisses, "let me go. I need to supervise. What if they start—"
"No." I tighten my hold on her elbow. "You're staying here."
"But they need me!"
"They absolutely do not."
Samy narrows her eyes at me like I just betrayed a sacred pact.
"Young man," she warns, pointing a dramatic finger at my forehead, "I am the appointed sexual emotional therapist for both Jay and Keifer. This is destiny."
I pinch the bridge of my nose.
"You appointed yourself, Samy."
"And destiny appointed me back," she argues.
God.
Jay is inside that office, shaking. And this gremlin is trying to kick the door open like a chaotic guardian angel with no filter.
I feel the heaviness sit in my chest again.
Jay.
My Jay.
Not mine in the romantic sense—never like Keifer's—but mine the way you care for someone younger, someone you want to protect from the universe.
My little sister in all the ways that matter.
And she's in there right now, fighting breath by breath to keep herself standing.
Samy bumps her shoulder into mine.
"You're doing that brooding silent protector thing again," she says.
"I'm thinking."
"About Jay?"
"Always."
Her face softens—brief, rare. "Yeah. Me too."
For a moment, we both just stand in the hallway, listening.
Inside the office, the muffled tense silence cracks, and I hear Keifer's voice—low, rough, too close:
"Jay… please."
Samy's eyes widen like she's listening to an audiobook titled 'Enemies to Lovers But They're Both In Denial'.
"Ohhhh," she whispers dramatically. "He did the 'please.' Coel, the 'please' is deadly. The 'please' means he's about to—"
"Samy."
"What?! I'm narrating the plot!"
I sigh again.
But she's right.
Keifer's voice sounds like a man at the edge of something he can't control.
And Jay…
God, Jay's breathing is uneven even through the door.
I clench my jaw, imagining her small shoulders curled inward, trying to hold herself together.
She looks so strong to the world.
To me, she's a kid I promised myself I'd protect—even if she never asked.
Samy's POV
Coel is holding my arm like I'm some kind of criminal trying to commit emotional arson.
Which, to be fair… accurate.
But SERIOUSLY, how the hell does he expect me to stay calm when inside that office:
—Keifer "arm veins blessed by the gods" Watson
and
—Jay "professional runner from her own feelings" Jay-Jay
are having a tense, breathy confrontation??
A girl has a duty.
I press my ear to the wall.
Coel tries to yank me back.
I slap his hand. "DON'T TOUCH ME. I'M WORKING."
"You're not working. You're causing property damage."
"Hush," I whisper dramatically. "It's happening."
Inside, I hear Keifer's voice again—lower this time:
"Tell me the truth, Jay."
OH MY GOD.
I turn to Coel with my mouth wide open.
"He said that like he's about to kiss her senseless! Did you hear that? Did you— Coel. COEL. DID YOU—"
"Yes, Samy, I heard it," he mutters, rubbing his face.
"And you're STILL keeping me away from the door???"
"Because Jay needs space," he says quietly.
And that… makes me pause.
Coel looks wrecked.
Like he's holding something heavy in his chest.
His next words come out softer than I expect.
"She's like a little sister to me," he says.
"Watching her fall apart like that on the rooftop… Samy, I can't stand it."
Okay.
Ouch.
That hits even my chaotic gremlin heart.
I let out a breath. "Yeah… I know. She scared me too."
Coel nods once, jaw tight.
Inside the office, there's a sudden muffled sound—Jay's voice cracking.
Coel flinches.
He hates it.
I can see it in the way his shoulders tense.
"You want to protect her," I say.
"Yes."
"But Keifer wants to love her."
Coel's eyes flick to me.
He doesn't say anything, but the truth sits between us like a flashing neon sign.
"And," I add with a sly smile, "Jay wants to pretend neither of those things exist."
Coel breathes out a laugh—short, bitter.
"Yeah. That sounds like her."
Then suddenly, the tension is too much for my system.
I need to release energy or I'm going to EXPLODE.
So I cup my hands around my mouth and scream toward the closed office door:
"JAY-JAY, BE HONEST! IF THE MAN'S VOICE ALONE CAN MAKE YOU TREMBLE, IMAGINE WHAT HIS—"
Coel clamps a hand over my mouth so fast he nearly lifts me off the ground.
"NO," he hisses.
"YOU'RE DONE. STOP. STOP EXISTING IN THIS MOMENT."
I'm kicking my legs like a toddler mid-tantrum.
"MMFF—LET—ME—HELP!"
"You're not helping!"
"YES—I—AM—!!!"
God, this man does not appreciate genius.
Coel's POV
I finally drag Samy halfway down the hall, far from the office door, before releasing her mouth.
She inhales like she just survived drowning.
"I was HELPING THEM HEAL," she declares, offended.
"You were giving Keifer a stroke."
"Good. Maybe he'll loosen up enough to confess more aggressively."
"Samy!"
She throws her hands up. "Fine, fine! I'll wait. But if they don't make progress in the next two minutes, I am forcibly entering therapy mode."
I look at the closed door.
Jay is in there breaking.
Keifer is trying to hold the pieces.
Samy is trying to burn everything and call it love.
And me?
I'm trying to stand guard for a younger sister who doesn't know how to ask for help.
But God—
I hope this doesn't shatter her further.
I hope Keifer doesn't push too hard.
I hope Jay doesn't collapse.
I hope—
I hope she lets someone in.
Even if it's not me.
Even if it's him.
Samy's POV
Coel looks torn.
Like he's watching his little sister walk on a tightrope and can't do anything about it.
I nudge him with my elbow.
"She'll be okay, Coel. Jay-Jay runs, but she doesn't break easily."
He looks at the floor.
Quiet.
Heavy.
"No," he says softly. "She does break easily. She just hides it better than anyone."
Oof.
I feel that in my soul.
I lean back against the wall beside him.
"And Keifer?" I ask.
Coel releases a slow breath.
"That man looks at her like she's sunlight after years underground."
He pauses.
"But sunlight can burn, too."
I grin. "Ooooh look at you being poetic."
"I'm being serious."
"I know. I just like annoying you during character development."
He glares at me.
I wiggle my eyebrows.
"I swear," he mutters, "you're going to be the reason I get fired."
"No," I correct proudly, "I'll be the reason Jay gets a love life."
He groans.
Inside the office, Jay's voice wobbles again—barely audible.
Coel shuts his eyes.
Yeah.
He's worried sick.
But then Keifer's voice flows through the door—gentle, low, full of something that makes even MY knees weak:
"Tell me what you need, Jay."
Damn.
I clutch Coel's sleeve.
"Coel… Coel… COEL… that's the line. That's THE LINE."
"Samy, please—"
"That's the line men say before they either propose or pin you against a wall."
"OH MY GOD—"
I ignore his panic, cup my hands, and scream again:
"JAY-JAY! COMMUNICATE! HIS EYEBROWS ALONE COULD FIX YOUR TRAUMA!"
"STOP!!" Coel practically tackles me.
"But they need meeee!"
"No, they do NOT!"
This is torture.
COEL is torture.
Jay is torture.
Keifer is holy water poured onto the fire of my imagination.
But even through my chaos…
somewhere beneath my nonsense…
I'm rooting for them.
For Jay to stop running.
For Keifer to stop hurting.
For Coel to stop carrying the weight alone.
For all of them to figure out whatever this mess is.
Even if I have to keep screaming dirty encouragement from the hallway until it happens.
Jay-Jay's POV
My chest feels like it's trying to escape through my throat as the door clicks open. Keifer steps in, eyes sweeping over me like he's scanning every quiver of fear I haven't managed to hide yet. My legs threaten to buckle. Coel and Samy glance at each other, and I know they can see it too—every tremor, every shallow breath.
"Give us a moment," Keifer says, voice low, commanding, yet careful.
"No. Keifer—don't," I whisper, voice breaking. My throat is raw from screaming at myself to just breathe, to just not crumble.
He takes a single step closer. The air between us is taut. You could slice it with a knife. "No," he insists. "I'm not losing you because you're scared of something you won't tell me."
Samy's voice cuts through the tension, loud enough to make me flinch. "THIS IS BETTER THAN MY K-DRAMAS!"
Coel's hand shoots out, gripping Samy's wrist firmly. "Samy. Back. Now."
Samy wiggles, mock-protesting, "I'm helping! You're not going to tell me you don't want moral support?"
I groan and press my hands to my face. Too much. Too many feelings at once. My heart is drumming like a jackhammer, and Keifer's gaze is too sharp, too knowing.
He steps closer, but not too close—not yet. Close enough that the heat from him brushes my skin, close enough to cage me, to hold me in the gravity of him. My breath stutters, betraying me.
"Give me a chance…" he murmurs, almost inaudible, but it reverberates through me like a shot of fire. "…or tell me to leave your life forever."
My eyes widen. Panic floods me like a rising tide. My knees feel weak, but my hands cling to the edge of the desk as if it's an anchor to keep me from sliding right into him.
"But if you choose me," he continues, voice dropping lower, vibrating in the small space between us, "then you tell me the truth. All of it."
I shake my head violently, forcing my eyes away. My chest heaves. The memories of that elevator kiss, the way I ran, the way my own body betrayed me—I can't tell him. I can't. Not yet.
"Jay," he says softly, leaning slightly, his voice breaking through the panic like a gentle hand on my shoulder. "This isn't just desire. I want you. All of you."
"I… I can't," I whisper, barely audible.
He freezes, as if the weight of my words hit him like a stone. The first crack in his unshakable composure appears. He doesn't move closer, doesn't reach out. He respects the walls I've built, even as he pleads.
"Then give me one reason that isn't a lie," he says, voice breaking for the first time. "One reason you won't tell me."
I sob silently. No sound comes out. Just the tight, raw press of emotion that has been suffocating me since that elevator ride.
"Jay…" he breathes, almost a whisper now, "tell me what you're afraid of."
I exhale shakily, letting a fragment of myself slip into the space between us. "…Myself."
His eyes go completely still, gutted, and for a moment I see a shadow of pain that mirrors mine.
Keifer's POV
Seeing her like this—so broken, so fragile—it kills me. And yet, there's a heat in the chaos of it, the way her chest rises and falls, the tremor in her hands, the almost imperceptible quiver in her lips. I want to gather her in my arms, hold her until the world disappears, but I know she's not ready.
Her whispered words hang in the air, a confession that shatters me: herself. She's terrified of herself. Not of me. Not of what we could be. But of her own capacity to love, to accept, to be happy. My gut twists. I've never wanted someone so much, while simultaneously wanting to shield them from themselves.
I lean just a fraction closer, letting the warmth of me brush against her without touching. "Then I'll wait," I murmur. "I'll stay right here. Not for hours, not for days, but as long as it takes. Just tell me you're not going anywhere."
She shakes her head. Her hands clutch at the edge of the desk like she can keep herself from collapsing. My chest tightens at every silent plea she can't voice.
Samy's POV
I peek around the corner. Oh, gods. This is worse than I imagined. Worse and hotter and heartbreaking all at the same time. The tension could fry eggs. And I swear, if she tells him anything remotely sexy, I'm gonna combust from jealousy—or maybe arousal, who even knows anymore.
"Coel," I whisper urgently, "if they start kissing, I'm breaking in. I need to see if his tongue technique is patented or illegal."
Coel groans, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Samy, please."
"I'm doing science," I whisper back, glaring at him. "This is research for humanity, okay? Moral support!"
Meanwhile, the sight of Jay's trembling hands, the way her lips quiver, is basically murdering me on the inside. And Keifer… oh, sweet lord, the way he's standing there, contained chaos in a human body. Sin in a suit, I swear.
Jay-Jay's POV
I glance at Samy, aghast, but the noise barely registers over the pounding in my chest. I feel cornered, but not trapped—not exactly. Keifer's presence, even without touch, is magnetic. Dangerous. Heated. Pulling at something primal I've spent years denying.
"Jay," he murmurs, again, and the sound alone sends shivers down my spine. My stomach clenches. I want to run. I want to hide. I want to melt into him all at once.
"Please," I whisper, trying to keep the panic low, trying to hold myself together.
"Fine," he says finally, softer now, almost a plea. "Give me ten minutes. Ten minutes, and you tell me what's going on—or I'll spend the entire night outside your office door."
I stare at him, wide-eyed, heart hammering in my chest. Ten minutes. Ten minutes I can survive. I whisper, barely audible: "Fine. Ten minutes."
He exhales, a slow, deep release like he's been holding his own breath the entire time.
Coel's POV
Watching this… her trembling, his gaze, the subtle shoves of air between them—it's like watching a hurricane form in slow motion. And she's at the eye of it, so fragile. I feel every instinct I have to protect her surge. She's like a younger sister to me, except this is no sibling situation. She's delicate, but she's also a force. I just… don't want to see her break because of what she's afraid of inside herself.
Samy is losing her mind as usual. "If she moans, I'm suing the company for emotional trauma," she mutters.
I pull her back. "Shut up. Now."
"But I'm researching!" she protests. "How is he allowed to look that good while emotionally devastating her?"
Samy's POV
I glare at Coel, but he's right. I can't ruin the moment. Except… the tension is killing me. My ovaries are filing harassment charges against Keifer in advance, I swear. The way he's standing there, commanding the air, and she's shaking in response—oh, it's criminal.
"Jay-Jay," I whisper to myself, mostly just to mentally groan. "If you let him… oh boy, your life is about to be a full season of K-drama I would binge illegally."
Jay-Jay's POV
The hallway seems impossibly long, yet I can't move away from the gravity of him. My own thoughts betray me. I shouldn't want him this badly. I can't be enough. He deserves someone perfect. But the warmth from him, even from a distance, claws at me. I can't think straight.
Ten minutes. I can hold it together for ten minutes. I repeat it like a mantra. Keep breathing. Keep standing. Don't break.
Keifer exhales slowly, like he's releasing all the tension in the world into this hallway. "Good. That's all I ask," he murmurs.
I nod faintly, swallowing a sob. Ten minutes. I can survive ten minutes.
Keifer's POV
She looks like she might collapse, like she's barely holding herself together, but I don't care. I can't care. I just need her. Ten minutes. That's all she's allowed right now. Ten minutes to start telling me the truth, or to let me show her she doesn't have to be afraid.
I see her lips tremble, her eyes wide and scared. God, the way her hands clutch the desk—my chest aches. I'll wait. I'll stay. I'll do anything. Ten minutes. That's all I need.
Samy's POV
I huff and flop dramatically against the wall, muttering, "This is torture. I am morally obligated to make sure someone at least moans once. For science."
Coel groans. "You're impossible."
"Yes, but also, entirely correct," I mutter, eyes glued to the tension playing out like a very hot, very dangerous fireworks show.
Jay-Jay's POV
The cool night air hits me like a shock. I sprint across the office floor, my heels slapping against the tiles, my chest tight, every thought screaming at me to escape. The elevator, the hallway, the confrontation with Keifer—it all swirls inside me, spinning, suffocating. I don't even look back. I just run until the city lights break the darkness in front of me.
I reach the rooftop and throw myself onto the cold ledge, hugging my knees. The wind tangles my hair around my face, whipping me violently, but I don't care. I close my eyes and press my cheek to my arms, trying to hold myself together. My body shakes, uncontrollably, like it's unraveling from the inside out.
Footsteps approach. Coel's and… Samy's. Figures appear through the dim rooftop lights. I hear Coel's voice first.
"Jay… you can't just… stay out here like this."
I don't respond. I can't. The tears have started now, unbidden, spilling over, and my shoulders shake in rhythm with my sobs.
Samy plops down beside me, her legs stretched out, elbows resting on her knees. Her voice is loud, chaotic, teasing.
"Girl… you need holy water. And maybe a therapist. And maybe his—"
"SAMY!" Coel snaps, and I finally manage a muffled laugh between tears.
Samy throws her hands up innocently. "WHAT? I WAS GONNA SAY HUGS!"
I can't help but let out a shaky giggle that turns immediately into a cough-sob. She's ridiculous. And somehow… comforting.
Coel steps closer, crouching in front of me, arms out. "Jay… let me."
I hesitate, then allow him to gently wrap me in his arms. The warmth of him, steady and protective, grounds me slightly. I bury my face into his chest, clinging like I might drift away if I let go.
"I… I can't," I whisper, voice trembling, "I can't meet his condition. I can't tell him… not the truth."
Coel tilts my chin up gently. "I'm not going to let you break alone, Jay. You're not alone."
I shake my head, tears dripping down, my chest tight. "He… he deserves someone better. He… he deserves someone… whole. Not… not me."
Samy leans closer, surprisingly soft, brushing my hair behind my ear. "And if that's true, that man's gonna be mine. I'm not loyal like that, so fair warning."
I laugh through my tears, a small, broken sound. It mixes with the sobs, the wind, the chaos in my chest. Samy grins like she's just declared war, and I can't help but roll my eyes through the salt of my tears.
Coel's POV
Watching her crumble, I feel a protective surge I didn't know I had left. She's like a younger sister in my mind—someone I need to shield, someone I can't let the world or her own fears hurt. The tears, the shuddering breaths, the way she trembles in Samy's chaotic presence—it's heartbreaking.
"She's afraid," I mutter softly to myself, "but it's not just about Keifer. It's deeper than that. Something old. Something broken inside her that isn't just fear of love. It's fear of herself."
I tighten my hold gently, letting her rest against me, her head tucked near my shoulder. "Jay… you deserve to be loved loudly," I whisper, almost to myself as much as to her.
Her lips tremble as she shakes her head. "Not… by him."
I tighten the embrace. "Especially by him."
The wind whips around us. Samy's voice cuts through again, loud and inappropriate as ever.
"Girl, if you don't take that man's offer, I will steal him! I don't play fair!"
I groan, trying not to laugh despite the heaviness of the moment. Samy, chaotic and untamable, somehow lightens the edge, even if it's messy.
Jay-Jay's POV
I cling to Coel as the city lights blur, the skyline dizzying. Samy's ridiculous threats make me laugh through the tears, a broken, shaky sound that only emphasizes how raw I feel.
"I… I think… I think he'll leave me if he knows me… really knows me," I confess into Coel's chest.
His hand rubs circles along my back. "Jay… it's not just about him leaving. I see it. You're terrified of… something inside you. Not him. Not your love for him. You're scared of… yourself."
I tighten my hug around him, sobs shaking through me. Samy's elbow nudges me gently, whispering, "Yeah, girl. Maybe. Or maybe he'll just do that thing with his lips and you'll melt all over again. Not that I'm jealous or anything…"
I giggle in between cries, a soft, shaky sound. Even through the pain, Samy's madness is grounding me somehow.
Coel murmurs softly, voice low and intimate: "Jay… whatever it is, we'll face it. Together. You're not broken. Not completely. Just… hiding pieces of yourself. And you don't have to hide them from me. From anyone who loves you."
I bury my face deeper into him, letting myself feel small, exposed, and yet safe. "I… I don't know if I can ever… show him the real me," I admit, trembling. "I'm… I'm afraid he'll leave."
Coel's grip tightens. "Then he'll just have to prove you wrong. But no matter what, I'm not letting you break alone."
Samy pipes up again, half-serious, half-chaotic: "And if he doesn't man up, I will. For research, obviously."
I manage a shaky laugh that dissolves back into tears. Somehow, amidst the devastation, the chaos, the fear, the ridiculous comedy, I feel a small flicker of something warm—hope, maybe. Or maybe it's just knowing I'm not alone.
Coel's POV
I feel her shaking against me, her sobs rattling through her tiny frame, and I know there's something ancient inside her—a scar deeper than the surface she shows the world. I can't fix it for her, not entirely. But I can hold her, keep her safe, let her feel that she deserves to be loved, even if she can't see it yet.
Samy's antics are infuriatingly funny, but she also forces me to keep perspective. The absurdity, the chaotic energy, is exactly what Jay needs to remind her that life isn't just pain, that there's humor even in heartache, that there's warmth and love even in fear.
Her tears soak through my shirt now, her body shaking uncontrollably. I whisper again, almost to myself, almost to her: "Jay… you deserve to be loved loudly. Don't ever forget that."
She murmurs back, almost inaudible, "Not by him…"
I shake my head. "Especially by him."
And I know—he's out there. Keifer. Watching. Waiting. Hoping. And maybe, just maybe, she'll find the strength to meet him halfway.
Samy's POV
I flop dramatically onto the ledge beside her, trying not to touch but somehow accidentally elbowing her. "Girl… seriously. He's gonna kill me for this. Or you. Or both. But if he doesn't, I will. That man's ridiculous. The audacity of him. And the way he looks at you like he's been starving for your soul…"
Jay snorts through her tears. "Samy…"
"I'm just providing moral support!" I defend myself. "And scientific observation. For humanity. And ovaries. My ovaries are at stake here, people!"
Coel groans beside me, muttering something about the chaos of being a human with friends like us.
I shrug. "Hey, someone's gotta keep the testosterone from killing everyone."
Jay-Jay's POV
I hug Coel tighter, letting the city lights spin around me. Samy's ridiculous commentary and chaotic energy, combined with Coel's protective warmth, create a strange cocoon of safety amidst my panic.
"I… I don't know how to be… loved," I whisper. "Not fully. Not… with everything I am."
Coel sighs softly. "Jay… you're not alone. And you deserve to be loved. Fully. Openly. Loudly. By someone who sees you and chooses you anyway."
I nod against him, tears soaking through my hair. Somehow, I feel the smallest flicker of courage, a whisper of trust.
Keifer's POV
I stand in the shadows of the rooftop door, watching her from afar. My chest aches at the sight of her curled up against Coel, her tears glinting in the city lights. She's terrified—terrified of herself, terrified of letting me in.
And yet… I will not let her go.
"I'm going to make you mine again, Jay-Jay," I whisper to the night, my voice swallowed by the wind. "And I'm going to make you love yourself again. Even if it kills me."
Her sobs reach me faintly, fragile and heartbreaking, and I swear, no force in the world will stop me from proving to her that she deserves every ounce of love she's too scared to accept.
Jay-Jay's POV
I pull my knees closer, hugging myself as if I could squeeze my fear and shame out of my body. The city lights flicker below me, indifferent to my collapse, the wind tugging at my hair, at my coat, at the pieces of me I wish I could bury. Coel's arms around me are steady, grounding, but still… the heaviness inside doesn't lift.
"I… I just… I don't think I can ever tell him everything," I murmur, voice barely above a whisper. "Not my truth. Not… all of it."
Coel tightens his embrace. "Then you don't have to tell me. Not tonight. But you can't carry it alone."
Samy plops down next to me again, knees almost grazing mine, her voice loud enough to slice through my fog. "Girl, I'm just saying… if you don't take him, I will. For research. For science. And possibly because I have no self-control."
I let out a strangled laugh that turns immediately into a hiccuping sob. Somehow, her ridiculousness, her audacious, chaotic energy, cuts through my panic like a spark.
"Samy…" I gasp, trying to focus on her words and not the gnawing fear in my chest. "You can't… this isn't…"
"Shush!" she says, leaning closer. "I'm saving you from heartbreak… my own ovaries are at stake. And, let's be honest, he's criminally hot. Someone has to intervene."
I bury my face further into Coel's chest, laughing and crying at the same time. Samy's antics are absurd, but there's something comforting in the chaos.
Coel's POV
I watch her shaking, her tears soaking through her coat, and I feel a protective rage rise in me. Not at her, never at her. But at the fear she lets consume her. At the world that made her doubt herself so deeply. She's like a younger sister I never had, fragile yet burning with a light she doesn't let anyone see.
"Jay… you're falling apart," I whisper, my hand brushing a stray strand of hair from her face. "And it's okay to fall. But I'm not letting you break alone."
Her lips tremble against my chest. "I… I don't deserve him. I don't deserve anyone," she whispers.
I press my hand gently to her back. "You're wrong. You deserve to be loved… fiercely. Loudly. By someone who chooses you, all of you, even the pieces you hide."
Samy, of course, cannot let the moment remain solemn. "And if he doesn't, girl, I'm totally swooping in. For your safety. And maybe mine. But mostly for science."
I roll my eyes, but I can't help the small smile tugging at my lips. Samy's absurdity is grounding in a strange way. It reminds Jay—reminds me—that even amidst chaos, life has humor.
Jay-Jay's POV
I hiccup, laughing through the tears, trying to let myself breathe. Samy's ridiculousness is ridiculous enough to be comforting. Coel's arms are steady, grounding me in a way I haven't felt in hours.
"I… I think he'll leave me," I admit softly, voice cracking. "If he knows… really knows me. All of me."
Coel tightens his hold. "Then he'll just have to prove you wrong. And I'm here. Always."
Samy leans closer, grinning. "Also, if he doesn't man up, I will. For safety. And science. And… fun. Mostly fun."
I laugh through my sobs, shaking my head. "Samy, you are impossible."
"And yet… necessary," she replies, winking.
Coel's POV
Her tears are soaking my shoulder now. I can feel the weight of her fear, the old, jagged edges of something inside her that's been hiding for years. This isn't just relationship fear—this is survival, protection, shame, something she's been carrying alone for too long.
I stroke her back gently. "Jay… you deserve to be loved loudly. Don't hide. Not from him. Not from anyone."
She shakes her head against me. "Not by him."
I tighten my arms. "Especially by him."
Samy's voice cuts through again, bright and loud: "And if he doesn't, girl, I will swoop in. I am not loyal, and I'm probably morally questionable, but you need support. And research. And I like chaos."
I groan, muttering something about humans being impossible, while Jay laughs faintly through her tears. Somehow, Samy's madness balances the intensity of the moment, gives her space to breathe, to feel… alive, even in brokenness.
Jay-Jay's POV
I finally lift my head slightly, looking out at the city. It's so vast, so bright, so uncaring—and yet… it reminds me that I am still here. I'm still breathing. Still trembling. Still alive.
"I… I think he'll leave if I tell him," I whisper, voice breaking. "I'm too… damaged. Too broken. Too…"
"You're human," Coel interrupts softly. "And he's human. And he loves you. Even with the pieces you hide. Even with the parts you're terrified to show."
Samy nudges my shoulder, whispering loudly: "Also, if you don't, I will. I'm serious. I have zero loyalty and infinite chaos. And his tie is kinda delicious. Just saying."
I snort through the tears, managing a small laugh. Even in this darkness, her insanity is light.
Coel's POV
I feel her shuddering in my arms, her small frame trembling with unspoken fears. She's carrying something deep and old, something she's ashamed of, something that isn't about love or desire but survival—of herself.
"Jay… you deserve to be loved loudly," I whisper again, voice low, steady. "You deserve someone to choose you, all of you, and to love you without apology."
She shakes against me. "Not by him…"
I squeeze her tighter. "Especially by him."
Samy, of course, cannot resist: "And if he doesn't, I will. Totally. For research. For chaos. For… fun. Mostly fun. And maybe, just maybe, your emotional stability depends on me being slightly inappropriate."
I groan, but I can't help the small smile tugging at my lips. Samy is a hurricane, a disaster, but somehow… necessary. And Jay needs this hurricane to balance the storm inside her.
Jay-Jay's POV
I finally let myself cry fully, into Coel, into the night, into the chaos that Samy brings with her ridiculous commentary. For the first time in hours, I feel like I can let some of it out. My fear, my shame, my terror that Keifer will leave… it all spills.
"I… I don't know if I can ever… be enough," I admit, voice trembling.
Coel strokes my hair gently. "Jay… you are. You are more than enough. And if he can't see that, it's his loss. Not yours."
Samy grins, half-seriously, half-chaotically: "And if he doesn't see it, I will. For research. For chaos. For science. And because, let's be honest, he's ridiculously hot, and someone needs to document that fact."
I laugh, a broken, trembling sound, feeling a small spark of warmth in the darkness.
Keifer's POV
I watch from the shadows of the rooftop door, chest tight, heart pounding. She's curled against Coel, her sobs tearing at me. Her fear, her brokenness, the walls she's built… I see them all. And I refuse to let them win.
"I'm going to make you mine again, Jay-Jay," I murmur to myself, barely above a whisper, swallowed by the wind. "And I'm going to make you love yourself again. Even if it kills me. Even if it takes everything I have."
Her tears glint in the city lights. She looks fragile, lost, and yet… there's fire in her, and I will fan it, nurture it, protect it, no matter what. She will not slip through my fingers. Not now, not ever.