The morning air at Evermore University felt different. Too still. Too sharp. As if the world had moved on while Reina was still trying to gather the broken pieces of last night.
She stepped out of her room with her hair tied loosely, her bag hanging from one shoulder, and her heartbeat strangely unsteady. She had practiced her breathing three times before leaving home, whispering to herself:
"You're fine. You're okay. Life continues."
But her voice didn't carry the conviction she wanted.
Her mother's eyes had followed her silently as she left the house — worried, knowing something was wrong but choosing not to ask. That hurt even more. Sometimes silence from those who love you feels like a softer embrace than questions ever could.
The bus ride felt longer than usual, though maybe that was because her mind wouldn't settle.
People around her were chatting about assignments, sports rallies, cafeteria gossip, birthday parties — the world was laughing, moving, living. And Reina… she was just trying to exist.
Last night replayed in bright, painful flashes.
Adrian walking in with that girl.His hand around the girl's waist.The introduction.The smiles.The laughter.The way Reina's heart had twisted until she felt breathless.
"This is my girlfriend," he had said with that shy, proud smile.
And the universe felt like it had leaned in just to whisper: "Not for you."
She hated that she remembered every detail.
Hated that part of her was still hoping it wasn't real.
Even though it was.
Back at Evermore
The campus stood as it always did — towering buildings, green lawns, students buzzing around with life and energy. The sky was a dull, soft grey, the kind that looked like it might rain but never actually did.
She walked through the main gate.
Slow. Careful.
Like each step had weight.
At the courtyard, she paused. Because there he was.
Adrian.
Laughing.Bright.Alive.
Like nothing had ever happened.
He stood with the girl — his girlfriend — by his side. Their fingers loosely intertwined. She was tall, elegant, with long dark hair tied into a ribbon. Her smile was dazzling, the kind that reached her eyes and lit up her whole face.
And Reina felt something break quietly inside her again.
Not loud.Not explosive.Just a soft, painful shattering.
She looked down immediately, pretending to check her phone, pretending she didn't care, pretending she didn't feel the ache spreading across her chest like a bruise.
She whispered to herself, "Don't look. Don't look. Don't…"
She looked.
And she felt everything all over again.
The Pain of Seeing Something You Want But Cannot Touch
She wasn't jealous.
Not exactly.
Or maybe she was.
And she didn't even know what jealousy was supposed to feel like anymore — especially when the person she liked had never promised her anything.
Adrian was only ever kind to her.
Friendly.Warm.Supportive.Easy to talk to. Easy to be around.
He had never led her on.Never flirted with intention.Never hinted at anything deeper.
Then why… why did it hurt?
Maybe because she had built a story in her head — one the universe helped her build. Every moment with him, every tiny spark, every little glance felt like it meant something.
But maybe it never did.
He noticed her then — just a quick turn of his head. His eyes met hers across the courtyard, and for a second, his smile faded… replaced with something softer. Concern, maybe. Recognition.
He lifted his hand in a small wave, warm and friendly.
Her heart shattered again at how normal he was.
How unchanged he seemed.How easy everything was for him.
She forced herself to give a tiny smile, a tiny wave back, before quickly turning to walk toward her building.
"Please don't call my name… please don't come over… I can't handle that right now."
He didn't.
And that hurt her in a different way.
Trying to Move Like She Isn't Breaking
Her classroom felt like a sanctuary. The chatter of students didn't touch her. Even Melissa's bright smile felt distant.
"Reina! You look tired, girl. Late sleep?"
"Something like that," she replied softly.
Melissa leaned closer. "Are you okay?"
Reina smiled — the smile she had perfected for years.
The one that said I'm fine while she was drowning.
"Yeah, just stressed about deadlines."
Not a full lie.Not fully the truth.
Melissa believed her.
Most people usually did.
Reina took her seat and stared at her notebook. She tried to write. Her hand shook slightly.
Every time she blinked, she saw Adrian's hand around that girl's waist.
Every time she inhaled, she felt that sharp pinch behind her ribs.
Every time she tried to focus, her mind whispered It wasn't supposed to hurt like this… he wasn't even yours.
That was the part that tore her apart most.
She didn't have the right to feel angry.Or hurt.Or betrayed.
He didn't owe her anything.
He didn't make promises.He didn't play with her feelings.He was just kind.
And she was the one who turned kindness into hope.
The Confusion of Heartbreak Without a Relationship
When class ended, she walked out slowly. The hallway spun with noise — footsteps, voices, lockers slamming — but it all sounded far away.
Then she saw them again.
Adrian and the girl walking down the stairs together, his jacket around her shoulders. The girl laughed at something he said, her hand brushing his arm.
Reina's stomach tightened painfully.
She didn't know what she felt.
Jealousy?Grief?Anger?Shame?
All of it?Or none of it?
A part of her felt angry at him.
For being too nice.For making her feel seen.For making her believe she mattered.
Another part of her felt ridiculous for being angry at all.
He didn't do anything wrong.
She shouldn't feel betrayed.
There was nothing to be betrayed about.
Then another part of her whispered:
But why did he look at you like that?Why did he stay close?Why did he care so much?Why did he make you feel safe?Why did he come closer if he already had someone?
And she hated herself for thinking that.
Because she knew he was just kind.Just gentle.Just friendly.
That's who he was. With everyone.
She was the one who turned friendship into fantasy.
Maybe she was the one who misunderstood.
Maybe she was the one who felt too much, too fast.
Maybe she was the one who mistook comfort for connection.
Or maybe it wasn't her fault.
Maybe it was the universe — the way it kept pushing them together, the way every moment between them felt like destiny nudging her forward.
Maybe the universe lied.
Running Into Him Again
At lunchtime, she walked toward the cafeteria — her steps slow, her throat tight.
She prayed she wouldn't see him again.
Of course she saw him.
Adrian was holding a tray, the girl beside him. His eyes found Reina instantly, like they always seemed to. And for a moment, there was a softness, almost a question in his gaze — like he noticed something different about her.
He raised his hand slightly. "Hey, Reina! You good?"
That one word — her name from his lips — made her chest tighten painfully.
She swallowed. Hard.
"Yeah," she managed.
Her voice felt like it was made of paper.
He smiled — effortless, warm.
Then he turned back to the girl, whispering something that made her laugh.
Reina's hands trembled.
She felt like crying.She felt stupid for wanting to cry.She felt angry at herself for feeling anything at all.She felt guilty for feeling angry.
Why is this so complicated?Why can't I just be normal?Why can't I just be his friend?Why can't I just be happy for him?Why does it hurt when it shouldn't?
Her heart kept whispering things her mind didn't want to hear.
The Battle Inside Her
She found a corner seat and ate quietly.
Every now and then, her eyes drifted toward Adrian's table — unintentionally, unwillingly. She hated that her heart reacted every time she saw him smile.
Melissa nudged her. "Are you sure you're okay? You look… I don't know… off."
"I'm fine," Reina whispered.
It was becoming her most repeated lie.
Her chest hurt in a way she couldn't explain.
Because how do you tell someone:
"I'm hurting over a love I never had."
How do you explain the heartbreak of losing something that wasn't even yours?
How do you say:
"I don't know what right I have to feel this sad."
She clenched her fists.
"I should be happy for him," she whispered to herself.
"He deserves happiness. He's a good person."
But the words didn't soothe her.
They twisted deeper, like the knife was turning.
Because her heart whispered back:
Why couldn't that happiness be you?Why weren't you enough?Why does it hurt this much?
The Universe's Cruel Joke
Throughout the day, she saw them everywhere.
Walking together.Talking together.Laughing together.Sitting together.
Every sight was a fresh bruise.
At one point, she nearly bumped into them near the library staircase. Adrian stepped back quickly, placing a hand gently on his girlfriend's arm so she wouldn't fall.
And something inside Reina broke in a way she hadn't expected.
It wasn't jealousy.It wasn't anger.
It was grief.
Grieving the version of her heart that hoped.Grieving the future she once imagined.Grieving the dream she let herself believe in.Grieving the light she thought she had found.
She felt hollow.
As if everything inside her had caved in.
The Walk Home
Classes ended.
Reina walked home alone, her steps slow, the evening breeze brushing her hair gently.
She stared at the sky, wondering why the world felt so heavy today.
Maybe because she had finally let herself like someone.
Really like someone.
After years of being careful.After years of building walls.After years of convincing herself she didn't deserve softness.
And the universe gave her someone kind.Someone gentle.Someone who felt like light.
Only to say:
"Not for you."
Maybe that's why it hurt so much.
Not because she lost him.
But because she lost what she felt with him.
The version of herself that was hopeful again.
She wiped her cheeks.
She hadn't even realized she was crying.
At Home
Her mother called from the kitchen, "You're late, baby. Everything okay?"
Reina forced a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired."
Her mother didn't push.
Reina went to her room and sat on her bed.
She stared at the wall for a long time, her chest rising and falling too fast.
Once again, she whispered:
"He wasn't yours.""He didn't promise anything.""He didn't do anything wrong.""You should be happy for him.""You should be okay.""You're overreacting."
But her heart whispered back:
Then why does it hurt like you lost a piece of yourself?
She hugged her pillow tightly.
And for the first time in a long time…
she didn't fight the pain.
She let herself feel it.
Every ache.Every bruise.Every disappointment.
She cried quietly, letting her tears fall freely, letting her chest ache without forcing it down.
Because healing doesn't always look strong.
Sometimes it looks like breaking.Sometimes it looks like admitting your feelings — even when they don't make sense.Sometimes it looks like grieving someone who was never yours.Sometimes it looks like feeling too much, too soon — and forgiving yourself for it.
Tonight, Reina didn't try to be okay.
She didn't try to fix it.She didn't try to silence the ache.
She just let herself be human.
And maybe…
maybe that was the first real step toward healing again.