Alex slowly opened his eyes.
Yesterday, he had taken a sedative to ensure he would get plenty of sleep.
The reason? Today marked the start of the end-of-the-year exams, and he needed to be in top form.
The written test would begin in a few hours, and the following day, the one-on-one duels would start.
So sleep was paramount.
Since today was different, he stayed in bed and opened his status window.
—STATUS—
Name: Alexander, apprentice mage (63.38%)
Mana: 2,362/2,362
Mana Gathering: Wind Gathering (Beginner), Water Drop Meditation (Beginner)
Mana Control: Senturion Control (Master – 28.36598%)
Mana Sense: Water Bending (Beginner)
Elements:
Wind (Novice – 76%)
Water (Novice – 89%)
Skills:
Windslicer (Novice – 100%)
Watershield (Novice – 100%)
Windslicer Barrage (Apprentice – 100%)
Water Spear (Novice – 100%)
Spiked Water Arrow (Novice – 85%)
Water Scape (Novice – 90%)
It had been months since he last checked this information.
Even after five months of relentless training, he still could not bring his last two skills to perfection, no matter how much he strained himself.
He also couldn't advance to full novice mage status, since he was still using beginner training methods.
The only area showing significant improvement was Senturion Control. With the aid of mana potions, the six months he had spent training felt like a year, and with his continually growing mana pool, the effect was amplified.
At 28.3%, he could tangibly notice the improvements in his mana manipulation. This heightened his training efficiency and spellcasting capability.
Now his spells consumed a total of 16.8% less mana, approaching perfected apprentice-level mana control, while his other two trainings had improved just over 3%—still far from the potential 15% at full mastery.
This boosted his combat abilities significantly.
After reviewing his status window for a while, Alex dragged himself out of bed and prepared a substantial breakfast—he would need all the energy he could muster for the exam.
While eating, he realized that, once again, the pain of losing Marc had become a part of him. It no longer gnawed at him, and strangely, that absence of pain unsettled him.
This recurring sensation had started almost a month ago.
If the pain of losing him was gone, what remained?
'I only have anger, hatred, and a broken soul to show now,' Alex thought. "Quite depressing," he murmured.
After all the self-destructive training he had endured, his only reasons to move forward were the promises he had made to his friend—and vengeance, nothing else.
Alex silently clutched Marc's knight sword necklace, which he wore at all times.
Before he could sink deeper into his existential crisis, he finished breakfast, packed all his belongings, set them aside, and left his room.
He knew the coming days would be his last at the academy.
This place had brought him mostly pain, though sprinkled with moments of warmth from people like Tessa, Scarlett, or Fabian.
He had wanted to leave many times over the past year, yet stayed for reasons both practical and personal.
Once outside, Alex strolled through the academy grounds.
Thanks to the urgency of the exam preparations, the campus felt unusually calm.
Classes were over, leaving him with no obligations—perfect for conserving energy.
On his way, he noticed Scarlett sitting on a bench, relaxing.
She sensed him immediately and opened her eyes, looking at him.
Today she wore casual clothing, freed from her teaching duties.
"Hello, Alex," she greeted, her tone warmer than usual.
Alex paused briefly, thought for a bit, then spoke.
"Hello, teacher. May I sit? I would like to ask you for advice."
'Oh?' she thought. "Sure," she replied.
Looking at him, she noticed subtle changes—he seemed closer to the Alex she once knew, though the smile was gone.
Her hope rekindled slightly; she had long abandoned attempts to reach him after all her and Tessa's attempts ended in rejection.
"What would you like advice about?" she asked curiously.
"Have you ever lost someone really close?" Alex asked abruptly.
"Huh?" Scarlett blinked, caught off guard.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to pry," Alex quickly added, mistaking her surprise for annoyance.
As he rose to leave, Scarlett's voice called him back.
"No, don't worry. Your question just caught me off guard," she said gently.
Alex sat again and observed her.
"Yes, I have, Alex. Everyone loses someone close at some point. Why do you ask?" Scarlett responded softly, a hint of concern in her smile.
Alex nodded, then continued.
"After losing Marc and spending the last six months training as if my life depended on it, I've been waking up lately with a sense of emptiness. The pain of losing him is fading—or perhaps I've simply learned to live with it," he explained.
"That's the natural course of life," Scarlett said. "You lose someone, you grieve, but eventually, you move on. You feel the pain again only when something reminds you of what you've lost."
Scarlett guided him gently through his feelings. She recognized signs of healing and wanted to support him as much as possible.
"But that means I have nothing to fight for anymore—only the promises I made," Alex said, his voice dim.
Scarlett understood.
With the primary source of his motivation gone, he felt hollow, and that hollow feeling fed a quiet despair.
"Isn't that enough?" she asked softly.
"How?" he questioned, confused.
"Was it really the pain that drove you? Or wasn't it the promises—the determination to excel in the upcoming test, or to avenge Marc?" she asked, probing gently.
"How do you know all that?" Alex said, surprised as he had never shared these promises with her.
"Tessa told me. She was worried and asked for advice—that's when she filled me in," Scarlett explained.
"I see… Yes, that's indeed the case," Alex said, reflecting on the weight he had placed on Tessa.
"To me, it seems you were mistaken, Alex. You lived so long with grief that you thought your promises only mattered if you continued to suffer. But that isn't true. The promises hold weight on their own. You feel empty because pain was your main driver. Now that it's gone, you must find a new source of motivation."
Alex stood silently, pensive.
'She is right. But what can I use now?' he thought.
Scarlett, noticing his contemplation, asked tentatively, "Do you still plan on taking revenge on Bren Alderfell?"
"Yes. Otherwise, I don't think I'll find peace for the rest of my life," Alex replied.
"Do you understand the consequences?" Scarlett asked, her voice soft, careful not to provoke anger.
"Yes. I will likely need to escape the continent—but I can accept that cost for revenge."
"Would you really manage a continental escape with one of the most powerful noble families after you?" she asked.
"Yes. I know of a secret tunnel connecting Tessara to Aurethia," Alex revealed, keeping his tone casual.
"What?! Where did you find that?" Scarlett asked, astonished.
"An ancient textbook in Perrin's Gate Library," he lied smoothly.
"So, you're really going to do it?" she asked again.
"Yes," Alex replied, then went silent, thinking about something.
After a while of thinking, he stood abruptly, then he turned and said.
"Thank you for your guidance, Scarlett. I believe I've found a new source of motivation. Something Marc himself aspired to long ago. I'll follow that," Alex said firmly.
Scarlett smiled, relieved. Marc's aspiration had been noble—to protect those who could not protect themselves. She was glad Alex found something constructive.
Yet, in Alex's mind, the ideal twisted, darkened.
'I'll kill every corrupt noble in the world,' he thought quietly, not yet fully comprehending the consequences of such a merciless resolve.
He believed that by doing so, he would protect those who could not protect themselves.