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Content Warning: A Personal Note
This chapter contains one specific, graphic scene depicting a panic attack, followed by emotional exhaustion and support of a friend. This scene is based on my own personal experience and may feel intensely real.
The following readers should consider skipping this part of the chapter:
Someone with Panic Disorder or Generalized Anxiety Disorder
Someone who has experienced trauma or PTSD
Anyone currently dealing with high stress, overwork, or burnout
Someone who has recently faced a significant loss, such as losing a job or stability
For readers who have not lived through this, it might appear as 'heightened drama.' But for those who have, I know how easily words can become triggers. I don't want anyone to relive their pain because of my story.
To help you read safely:
The intense scene begins after Yuki reaches her apartment and closes the door, and concludes when Jennie arrives to care for her. The rest of the chapter contains other plot developments.
Your mental health comes first. If you are feeling vulnerable, please skip that section. There is no shame in protecting your peace.
Take care of your mental health.
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They were still arguing about where to eat when someone excitedly announced a restaurant name.
The moment Yuki heard it—her heart froze.
That place?Seriously?Internally she screamed.
I mean… yes, I've been there twice. Once after saving for three weeks and once because of a festival bonus—but I can't magically afford that every day! The food tastes like heaven but the prices feel like judgment day… And yesterday I already spent so much… I'll go bankrupt at this rate…
But she had already said "yes" earlier.
So now she just smiled and walked with them, blending in like a perfectly normal student…
…while internally wishing for a divine intervention.
Why is there no random bird dropping a poop comet?Why isn't an alien ship landing right now to abduct exactly these people?Why can't everyone suddenly get group dysentery for five minutes? JUST FIVE!Someone trip? Someone scream? Boom? Loud noise? Earthquake? Micro earthquake? PLEASE—ANYTHING TO CANCEL THIS PLAN—
Nope.Life was cruel and stable.
They kept walking towards the campus gate, still happily chatting about the restaurant.
Yuki's soul slowly left her body.
Just as they stepped out of the building—
Her phone rang.
Boss.
She answered hesitantly. "Hello?"
His panicked voice blasted through the speaker.
"Yuki! SO MANY CUSTOMERS! Everywhere! Maybe because of that BTS concert nearby—come FAST! I'll pay you double for today! You're the only one good at handling crowds!"
Yuki blinked.
"DOUBLE!??"
In the background, she heard another worker whispering in shock,"Boss… really double?"
The boss huffed, "If I say it's her class time, she won't come! Once she comes, I'll find a reason to deduct whatever I want. Just call her fast!"
The whispering worker sighed helplessly but said nothing.
Yuki didn't hear that part—only the "DOUBLE PAY."
And that was enough.
She turned to the group, bowing a little in apology.
"Guys—I'm really sorry. Emergency at work. If I go, I get double pay. Please forgive me today. I'll treat you next time, I promise!"
Before anyone could answer, she waved her hands—
—and ran.
Like her wallet depended on it.
Because it did.
Junghye watched her disappearing figure, jaw tightening with a hint of anger.
One of the guys clicked his tongue,"Forget her. She never has time for anyone. She only goes where there's profit."
Another nodded, annoyed.
But Soyoon—quiet, soft Soyoon—hugged Junghye arm,
"…Working is her income source. It must be hard. Let's not blame her."
The group fell silent for a moment.
But Yuki was already far away, sprinting toward survival.
The restaurant was packed. The air hummed with chatter, clinking cutlery, and the hiss of the grills. Customers crowded every table, and the staff were moving like a well-oiled machine—but barely keeping up.
Yuki darted between tables, taking orders, serving dishes, refilling drinks, and keeping her smile professional yet natural. Every movement was precise. Every word measured.
Today, the double payment buzzed in her mind like caffeine. It sharpened her senses. Every order, every tray, every plate—handled flawlessly. Not a single mistake. Not a single misstep. She was a storm of efficiency.
She picked up a new order from the counter, balanced the tray, and started heading toward the next table. That's when she noticed…
Her stomach dropped. Her heart skipped a beat.
They were here.
Junghye, Soyoon, and the rest of her university friends were sitting at a corner table, laughing, pointing at the menu, and completely oblivious to the crowd around them.
Why are they here? Yuki thought, frozen. Shouldn't they be in some other restaurant?
"Heyyy YUKIaaa!" Kyungsoo's voice rang across the dining area, cheerful and teasing.
Sungmin added, "Didn't know you worked here!"
Yuki blinked rapidly, forcing herself to breathe. She squared her shoulders, plastered on a professional smile, and stepped forward.
"Hello! It's… nice to see you all," she said, voice polite, controlled, yet unmistakably professional. "What brings you here today? Please, take your time, and order whatever you like."
Hyejin, Wonho, Haneul, Yejin, Chayong, and the others immediately launched into chatter.
"Yuki! You're our friend! Can we get a discount?"
"How is the tteokbokki today? Is it spicy enough?"
"Which dessert should we get? You try it first!"
Soyoon even leaned in to ask a small question about the side dish ingredients.
Yuki's mind whirred, counting the seconds. The crowd was huge today, and every second wasted meant chaos building somewhere else. She tried to guide them gently.
"Please, take a moment—but I do have other tables I need to attend. Could we decide quickly?"
But the group ignored her polite hints.
"It's your job to serve us, right?" Hyejin said with a mischievous grin. "You're our friend, Yuki. A few minutes won't hurt."
Yuki's smile never wavered, but her heart raced. She handled the teasing, the playful pressure, and the jokes with grace, answering questions and taking orders professionally.
Then Junghye, who had been silent until now, leaned back and spoke softly but firmly.
"This is the place and work you always leave us for… I think we're worth more than that."
Yuki froze. Words lodged in her throat. She didn't respond. The chatter of the others continued around her, but she could barely hear it. Every second stretched unbearably. She kept glancing at the clock in the corner, counting, hoping someone would hurry.
Meanwhile, back in the kitchen, the boss was furious.
"Where is Yuki?! Why is she late again?" he barked, turning red.
One of the staff hesitantly whispered, "Boss… her friends came… she's taking a little time with them."
"Friends?! In the middle of a full house?!" The boss's face twisted into rage. He stormed to the corner where Yuki was serving.
"YUKI!" he barked, voice booming across the crowded dining area. "What is this behavior?! This is not professional! Customers are waiting! You are here to work, not play with friends!"
Yuki tried to explain, voice trembling slightly but composed: "Sir, I've been taking their orders as fast as possible. I'm managing everything—"
"Enough!" he shouted, cutting her off. "I don't want excuses! This is unacceptable!"
The restaurant went silent for a heartbeat. Yuki felt the weight of every gaze, every whisper, every clatter fade as all eyes focused on her.
"And… you're fired. Immediately."
Yuki froze, the tray in her hands feeling like it weighed a thousand pounds.
"Sir… I—" she started, but he waved dismissively, storming off.
Her friends froze too, shocked and guilty. They hadn't meant this to happen.
Yuki's hands trembled slightly as she carefully moved to the staff room. She swallowed hard, forcing her professional composure back into place even as her chest ached.
This… this is the reality, she thought. No matter how well I work… some things I can't control. Even friends, even a smile, even double pay… I still can't escape the storm.
Yuki reached her apartment and closed the door behind her, the sound startlingly loud in the sudden quiet. She leaned against it for a moment, letting her bag slip from her shoulder, sliding to the floor.
And then… it hit her.
Every detail of the day crashed back like a relentless wave—the morning rush, the panic of missing class, the smiles and pampering with the girls, the amusement park laughter, the restaurant… the firing, the humiliation, the silence from everyone who had watched, the impossible professionalism she had forced herself to maintain…
Her chest tightened at the memories, her eyes stung as she sank onto the bed. She buried her face in her hands, shivering despite the warmth of the room. Thoughts of Junghye and Soyoon flickered across her mind—their closeness, their care for each other, so effortless, so natural—while she had struggled through a whirlwind of questions and demands, holding herself together, juggling every expectation, every smile, every polite response…
She forced herself to get up to drink some water. But suddenly…
The world tilted.
Her vision blurred, the edges of everything smearing into darkness. Breathing became a labor she could not control—shallow, ragged, desperate. A sharp, suffocating pain exploded in her chest, shooting through her heart, up into her throat, twisting her lungs into tight knots.
Her hands trembled violently, her knees buckling beneath her. Yuki's body refused to respond to her commands. She fell to the floor, curling slightly, panic flooding every nerve. What's happening? Why can't I breathe?
She clawed at the air with trembling fingers, trying desperately to draw in even a single full breath. Each attempt made the pain tighten more, pressing down, suffocating her, and slowly, her panic morphed into helplessness. She gave up, slumping against the floor, letting the crushing wave of pain engulf her entirely.
For thirty seconds that felt like hours, the world disappeared. The chest pain, the shaking, the suffocating darkness—all of it swallowed her whole.
And then… it was gone.
Just like that, as suddenly as it had arrived, the wave of pain receded. Yuki gasped, her lungs gulping in the air like a drowning person finally finding water. Her vision cleared, the room returned to focus. Her body stopped trembling, her hands loosened their death grip on the floor, and for the first time in that terrifying moment, she could breathe freely.
She lay there for several long, unsteady seconds, chest heaving, heart racing, mind struggling to comprehend what had just happened. Should she try to move? Could she? Her body felt like it had been drained of every ounce of strength.
Slowly, carefully, she sat up, testing her limbs, flexing her fingers, feeling her arms, her legs, every muscle that still obeyed her commands. They moved. They worked. She stood, unsteady but alive, taking slow, deliberate steps across the room. Her heart still pounded fiercely, but her body was—mostly—functional.
And yet…
The exhaustion was suffocating. Every step, every breath, felt like wading through invisible lead. Her muscles ached, her mind was heavy, and her entire being felt wrung out, drained to a level she had never experienced before. The wave of pain had passed, yes—but the aftermath lingered like a shadow, pressing her down, reminding her that surviving it had come at a cost.
Yuki sat on the bed, knees hugged to her chest, staring blankly at the wall. Her mind was foggy, still trying to process the overwhelming wave that had just passed. She lifted her trembling hands and typed a message with slow, shaky fingers.
"Jennie… I think I had a panic attack :) I just lost my job… I need you right now."
Her thumbs hovered over the keyboard for a moment before pressing send. Then she just sat there, breathing slowly, trying to convince herself that she wasn't completely broken.
An hour later, Jennie's class finally ended. Her phone buzzed furiously with Yuki's message. She read it once, then again, her chest tightening. Without thinking, she bolted out of the classroom, ignoring curious glances from her classmates, her bag bouncing against her hip as she ran.
When she reached Yuki's apartment, she practically threw open the door.
"Yuki! Hey, hey, look at me!" Jennie's voice was soft but urgent.
Yuki looked up, red-eyed and tear-streaked. Her body trembled slightly, even now. "Jennie… I… I don't even know what happened. My chest… I couldn't breathe… my vision went all… blurry… my hands, my legs… I just… I didn't know what was happening…"
Jennie immediately dropped to her knees in front of the sofa, taking Yuki's hands gently in hers. "Shh, shh, it's okay. Breathe with me, okay? In… and out… slowly."
Yuki tried, shallowly, and broke into quiet sobs. "I've never… never experienced anything like this before… I thought I was dying… Jennie…"
"No, no, you're not dying. You're okay, Yuki. You're safe now. Look at me, please," Jennie urged, cupping her face softly. Yuki's gaze met hers, tears pooling but slowly grounding her.
"I just… I don't understand. My job… everything happened so fast… I just…" Yuki's voice cracked, and her body shook again slightly, though not like before.
Jennie wrapped her arms around Yuki, holding her close. "I know… I know it's scary. But you're here. You survived it. Your body's strong, even if it feels weak right now. This… this is just your mind reacting to everything. You're not alone, okay? I'm right here."
Yuki buried her face into Jennie's shoulder. "It felt like… like my chest was going to explode. I couldn't… I couldn't even think straight… it was like my body betrayed me…"
"I know, baby. I know," Jennie whispered, stroking her hair. "But look, you're still here. You're breathing. You're alive. And I'm not going anywhere. Not for a second."
Yuki hiccuped, small sobs escaping. "I just… I don't want it to happen again… I don't want to feel that helpless…"
Jennie shook her head gently. "It's okay to feel scared. Panic attacks… they're terrifying, yes, but they don't define you. Not ever. You survived this one, and next time, I'll be right there again. We'll get through it together."
Yuki sniffled, finally pulling back slightly to look at Jennie. "Thank you… I don't know what I'd do without you…"
Jennie smiled softly, brushing the wet hair from her face. "You'll never have to find out, Yuki. I'm not leaving. Not now, not ever. Let's just sit here… breathe… and take it slow, okay?"
Yuki nodded, leaning back against the sofa as Jennie wrapped an arm around her. The room was quiet, save for the soft sound of their breathing. For the first time since the panic had struck, Yuki felt a little of the fear ease, replaced with the warmth of being cared for, held, and understood.
And for the first time that evening, she allowed herself to just… rest.
After a long evening of pampering, Jennie carefully stirred a small pot of soup, the aroma filling the apartment. She gently placed the steaming bowl in front of Yuki.
"Eat a little, Yuki. You need energy," Jennie said softly, her voice steady but warm.
Yuki shook her head faintly, still exhausted, still processing everything. "I… I don't even feel hungry…"
Jennie knelt beside her, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. "I know, baby. That's okay. But eat a few spoonfuls, and then sleep. I've got a little help for you."
She retrieved a single sleeping pill from the drawer. "Just this one. Rest, okay? You need it."
Yuki looked at her, eyes wide but trusting. "Jennie… thank you."
Jennie held her hand as Yuki took the pill with a sip of warm soup. Then Jennie quickly grabbed her phone and dialed her psychiatrist. Her voice was calm but urgent as she explained the situation.
"Doctor, it's Yuki. She's had a panic attack… first time ever. She's exhausted, scared… what should I do?"
The doctor's voice was steady and reassuring. "Jennie, you know the feeling after a panic attack—her body is weak, her mind is tired. She needs rest. Even if she acts uncertain or panicked, just be there, keep her calm. Don't push her. But listen, if panic attacks become frequent, she needs proper medication. And make sure you work on the root causes of her depression. Just being present is your most important role right now."
Jennie nodded, listening intently. "I understand. I'll take care of her."
After the call, Jennie whispered a quiet prayer to Allah, asking for Yuki's healing, her strength, and peace of mind. Then she moved efficiently around the apartment—organizing cushions, folding soft blankets, cleaning the kitchen, and chopping fresh vegetables so that tomorrow morning she could make a quick, healthy breakfast for Yuki without stress.
Jennie then took her phone and called her mother. "Mom… I need a helping hand. Study's becoming intense, and… I need someone to cook, clean, and organize a little, so Yuki and I can… breathe."
Her mother's voice was immediately worried. "Jennie, are you okay? Are you sick? You've never sounded this panicked. I've asked so many times if you need help, and now you're suddenly…"
Jennie cut her off gently, voice steady yet full of care. "Mom… it's Yuki. She's struggling so much. She lost her job, she's exhausted… and I've been buried in my studies and art projects. I can't care for her like I want to without help. If someone comes to organize things, prepare meals, life will be less stressful for both of us."
There was a pause on the other side of the line. "Baby… just rest. You're doing so much already… and please tell Yuki she can work in our company. What are family for ?"
Jennie smiled softly, replying with warmth and quiet pride. "Mom… you know Yuki. After all these years, she never wants to take any privilege from me. She deserves this help, and I want to make sure she's okay."
Her mother's tone softened. "Alright, baby. I'll send someone over. But you too… take care. Don't forget to rest."
Jennie's lips curved in a small smile as she ended the call. For a moment, she leaned against the counter, breathing deeply, heart full of resolve. Then she returned to Yuki, gently stroking her hair. "Everything will be okay, baby. You just sleep. I'll take care of the rest."
Yuki sleeping on her bed as the medicine reaction took her over.
Yuki sank into the quiet of the apartment, heart still racing, body trembling—and somewhere deep inside, a question whispered: if today had nearly broken her, could she ever truly find the strength to rise again?"