7 The First Layer of Hell.
Shocked, Sirius looked at me, was I too harsh? Maybe I was, but I kept on wondering why he didn't demand his trial. Every death eater claimed innocence, but I bet not one was asking for a trial or Veritaserum, or to even take a Magic oath. I bet if he kept on demanding a trial he would eventually get one.
"I... I… I don't know," muttered Sirius, "I should have done all that and I didn't, I kept on thinking it was my fault that James and Lily got killed and deserved to be in Azkaban." he said, he looked at me with a sad look in his eyes, "As a matter of fact, I only started to think of you on my trial when they mentioned your name, I don't understand why."
Professor Flitwick, who let Sirius into my room said: "Lord Black, allow me to cast some detection spells on you, I suspect you have been cursed to make you forget or ignore Mr. Potters's existence."
"You may do it, Professor Flitwick," said Sirius, "Being spelled would be the only explanation for me to forget my Godson. I should have been raging to get out of Azkaban, my Godfather's Oath would have compelled me to do that."
Flitwick waved his wand at Sirius and reported: "Lord Black, I suggest you contact Gringotts and let their curse breakers work on you, one curse is blocking your fertility, and one is partly undone, my guess is the compulsion to forget about Mr. Potter. I also detect a lot of memory charms and obliviating spells. Frankly said Lord Black, you are a mess."
I sighed: "Sirius, go to Gringotts, we both have been played with. And the one that was playing us is Dumbledore."
Flitwick commented: "In Lord Black's defense Mr. Potter, a lot of suspected death eaters swore an oath that death eaters put them under the Imperius curse. And they got set free."
"I can not believe the stupidity of the wizarding world" I shouted, "Of course they could swear that! They trained that spell on each other! Did they swear they were forced to get that mark on their arms? Did they swear they didn't enjoy killing?"
To be honest, I didn't think of that either until I read about it in a Fan Fiction. It is a good way out if that was the only question they took an oath on, or get a Crucio from Voldy as punishment, and you can swear you were tortured with the Crucio curse. The surprised faces of Flitwick and Sirius said enough.
"Get better soon Sirius," I said, "We need to set some things straight in this society. I have some questions to the members of the Potter Alliance on that topic."
Sirius nodded: "I will, pup, and I have some questions for the Order of the Phoenix too."
Xxxxx
Tonks Sr. came through, he made a good deal with Gringotts about the Basilisk, two days later after the inspection, a team of goblins came with me to the chamber to portkey the carcass away. Once the Basilisk was ported away, the team leader said: "Blooddagger told me to ask you if you happen to write letters under an alias, like Unidentified or Anonymous?"
I nodded: "I use Anonymous from time to time when I don't want to attract attention. Being famous has its drawbacks you know."
Scraper, the team leader nodded: "I can imagine that it can be a burden sometimes. Blooddagger told me if you were the one, there are some bonuses coming your way." he grinned and said: "Business here is done, now it is time to have fun, our brothers already started culling the Acromantula, and we are eager to get some too."
I tried the Goblin way to say goodbye: "May the blood on the battlefield be from your enemies, and the spoils give you a big profit."
He grunted: "It needs work, but it is a worthy try. Goodbye, Heir Potter."
Xxxxx
I got one thing wrong in my letters, I read too many Fan Fics to remember the real situation of Gellert, he was sentenced to life in Nurmengard, I thought Dumbles hid him there under a Fidelius… yeah, I know, that would be too complicated. I got the love affair right though and it got him sacked, the sap is still being questioned about his life and his many failures.
For some reason Hermione is in my room all the time… no, the reason is the books Mippy recuperated from Dumbledore, I don't have a permanent place for them yet, so the books are kept in my room.
I tried to get her out: "Hermione, I need to change my clothes, can you get out of my room please?"
"Oh, go ahead," she said, barely looking up from her book, "My parents are nudists, so I have no problem seeing you naked."
I sighed: "That is all swell and dandy, dear, but I have a problem getting naked in front of a girl, maybe that will change in a couple of years, but for now... Get Out!" with an afterthought I added: "Leave the book here please, Hermione, you can always come back and read them here, as long as I have clothes on though."
Hermione's sad face turned into a bright one, she rushed to me and gave me a hug. "Thank you, Harry, I will knock before entering from now on." the girl has a brain! And she starting to use it.
I introduced Tonks to the RoR, and explained its functions to everyone, "The person that calls for the room defines what it is going to look like and can allow others to make small changes, for example… you can ask the room for books. If I don't allow it, the room will not obey."
I grinned: "The things this room is able to do is amazing." suddenly the room changed into the Great Hall, then into a rain forest, a beach, a swimming pool, and a big library, each change was done within a minute.
"The only downside of this room," I told them, "Is that if it becomes common knowledge, everyone wants to use it. Especially the teachers will claim it for their classes, and we would not have a chance to use it again."
Tonks agreed: "Harry is right, eleven people are manageable, if you want some private time, like you girls want a girls' night out, discuss it, or make a schedule."
"Dips on the evenings that Slughorn is having his parties!" I called out.
"Why don't you want to go to his parties?" asked Hermione, "A lot of students are eager to get invited."
I shrugged: "I don't trust him, frankly, he is a butt kisser, sucking up to the famous, and ignoring the rest. He is like a spider in his web, using the members of his Slugclub to get benefits for himself."
I looked at Hermione: "All the ones he invites, would make it big in the world without him anyway, but, with a few meaningless favors and introductions from him, they think they owe their success to his club."
"Mum warned me for him too," said Tonks, "He collects celebrities like others collect chocolate frog cards. He drops you in a minute if you fall out of grace."
"Enough of this!" she shouted, "Potter! Get me that beach and some swimsuits… no, let us make our own swimsuits you little perv."
With a thought, a nice stretch of beach appeared, with two changing rooms, and the usual beach appliances, like chairs and beach balls.
A minute later Tonks yelled: "Stop changing it into a thong you perv, or I am going to hex your bits off!"
"Sorry Tonks," I shouted back, "Your perv comment made me imagine all kinds of stuff."
Not really, to tell the truth, I am just messing with her, and she could have put it on if I was lucky. We had fun for a couple of hours, Tonks arranged the eye candy, eleven and twelve year old's girls need a lot of growing to measure up against a prime piece of ass like Tonks. The elves provided snacks and drinks for us, and we forgot all about school.
We changed when it was time for dinner, Tonks gave me a hug, carefully avoiding contact between her titties and my face, she smirked when she saw the disappointment on my face: "Those are only for special occasions pervert. Wait until your girlfriends are older."
Zack grumbled: "He is getting plenty from you already, everyone is jealous of him. The older guys were pissed at Harry because his face was where they wanted theirs to end up in."
Tonks teased: "Ow, come here Zacharias, if you wanted a hug too, you just had to ask for one. Now, is this better?"
Zack sighed: "I hate to admit it, but that felt so good, Harry, I envy you."
Xxxxx
On Sunday, I got permission from Flitwick to visit Sirius in Gringotts with Tonks Sr.
"Feeling better, Sirius?" I asked, "Did they remove the fleas and lice? Trimmed the fur? Neutered you? Bought you a new leash?"
"You know I am an animagus, Harry?" asked Sirius, "Who told you?'
"Simple deduction, Pettigrew was a rat animagus, and I have some vague memories of a big black dog that used to play with me," I answered. "And? What did they find out?"
Sirius shook his head: "Too much to name them all, pup, they put a memory block on me to forget about you, I am obliviated more than twenty times, compulsion charms, a lot of them, and that nasty fertility curse became permanent. Ten years of that curse removed all hope to reverse it."
"I feel for you Sirius, who would benefit from this?" I asked.
"You would," answered Sirius; he explained, "Although I can't imagine you putting that curse on me at two years of age. The Malfoy's are next in line, Draco Malfoy is heir secondary, You are the Primary Heir, James allowed me to blood adopt you at your first birthday. That secured that by my death my vault won't go to my kin. I inherited quite a lot from my favorite uncle Alphard, I did not know grandpa kept me a Black."
"Sirius, Malfoy was a death eater, wasn't he?" I asked, Sirius nodded, "Well then Sirius, you have a just cause to hurt them. Narcissa Black knew that her head of House was innocent and even plotted to move you from the Lordship in favor of her son. That is line theft, also, with conspiring and refusing aid to her head of House, you can legally divorce her and kick her out of the family."
Tonks Sr. commented: "Harry is right, Lord Black, the minimum she should have done is to get you a trial, she knew you were innocent. And Harry, it shows that you are getting tutored in wizarding customs. Whoever is tutoring you is doing a good job. My compliments for that."
"There is more, Lord Black," Tonks continued, "It is in your power to give Harry his House Potter Heir ring, and as you just said, he is your Heir too, you could give him the Heir ring from House Black for extra protection."
Sirius nodded: "You are right, the rings will give him extra protection, come, we do House Black first."
Xxxxx
Scullscraper, the Black account manager was happy to see Sirius take control of the Vaults, with the help of Tonks, the three of us waded through a paper mountain of deeds and contracts, in the end, Draco and his Mommy got a few surprises coming their way. Me? I got a shiny posh ring on my finger.
I urged him to break the news to Cissy, so a smiling Sirius wrote a letter to Narcissa.
Narcissa,
It pained me to discover that you were responsible for that fertility curse, more even, you knew I was innocent, and didn't lift a finger to come to my aid. An aid you were honor bound to give, as I am your head of House Black from the moment Lord Arcturus died.
All of that, just to reassure you that your son Draco would be the next Lord Black, I am sorry but I have to disappoint you.
For your crimes against me, I cancel your marriage contract and reclaim the dowry you received. It is up to Lucius if he wants to keep you or kick you out. If I recall correctly, that dowry included the mansion you are living in and the elves that came with it.
Finally, Narcissa, I allow you to keep the name Black, because I know how it feels to get kicked out. But no Malfoy will ever inherit the Lordship of House Black.
Beware, any damage to my mansion will be repaired with money from the Malfoy vault.
Have a good life Narcissa, I hope your son will be a better man than his parents.
Lord Sirius Black
Auw, Sirius is a softy, he didn't kick her out of House Black. Too bad, she deserved it, although Draco didn't try to mess with me, it was the Sparks at the sorting and the drama after it that made him back off and keep his distance. Not that I care either way.
Xxxxx
Blooddagger grinned at me: "Heir Potter, not three months back in the Wizarding world and you are already surpassing your Ancestors! Your deeds are earning the respect of the Leaders of The Horde!" he almost shouted, "Ah, Solicitor Tonks, thank you for the idea to display the carcass of the Basilisk, even with three Sickles per person, we made a nice sum on entrance fees and raised the interest of potential buyers."
Tonks shrugged and said: "Heir Potter mentioned it to my daughter, and she passed it on to me. It seemed like a good strategy, I am glad you liked it."
Hmm? Nimmy is snitching on me? Or passing my Superior ideas to improve the planet on to her Dad… that must be it. Awed by my brilliance, my manliness, my out-of-this-world looks, sigh, it is so good to be me. I love myself… no, that sounds like a masturbation fantasy. Focus Dude!
Sirius heard the high praises of Blooddagger, silently recalling what he did at my age, and came up wanting. Poor bloke, he came up short. As I said, I am awesome!
I smirked a Sirius, then I presented Blooddagger with a small book with names and dates. Yep, I am going into the get-rich-fast at Stock market direction.
"Blooddagger, if you swear an oath of secrecy," I pompously said, "I'll allow you to benefit from the information in this book. I want you to use all the money from my share of the Basilisk and half of what the vault of Bellatrix got me, to invest in the companies on the dates I wrote down in this book. Do we have a deal?"
Hah! With this, I am going to be Nr1 in the world! ROB will laugh his ass off… if he has an ass.
Blooddagger didn't think twice to give his oath, after all, it didn't touch the Potter fortune, and this handsome, intelligent, dashing young man, me by the way, has done one amazing feat after another.
It was quite the prize according to his calculation, "We estimate that the Basilisk will sell for more than three million Galleons. A thousand-year-old Basilisk in prime condition is one in a thousand years chance. Stasis charms can preserve the ingredients and parts for up to a century. All that will drive the investors into a bidding war."
He looked at me: "You offered your companions five hundred thousand galleons each, Heir Potter, that is more than what a lower-middle-class family earns in a lifetime. That will not mean much for House Greengrass and Davis, but for House Tonks and Turpin that is a big social boost. For Miss Granger, it will mean danger, I am sorry to say, she will be the target of impoverished Minor and Noble Houses."
I shrugged: "Lord Black will no doubt take Hermione as a ward for House Black until she reaches adulthood or I get my Lordship, I will also protect her at Hogwarts."
I got serious now and asked: "How far are you along with those nasty trinkets? Blooddagger? Do you have them all?"
"Not all of them, Heir Potter," he answered, "The artifacts that are cleansed are in your vault. We are waiting for you to deliver the last one. You told us you needed Lord Black for that."
Puzzled Sirius asked: "What trinkets and what do you need me for, Pup?"
"We are Horcrux hunting, Sirius," I said, "One was with Lucius and Narcissa at their home, one was found in Bellatrix's vault, I bet there is one in your mothers' house, I heard she was a big fan."
Sirius swore: "That crazy maniac! Did he make more than one? If that is so, then it is possible there is one at home, my mother was batshit crazy and worshiped that creep."
"Call your elf, "I said, "If you have one that is, it will know if there is one or not."
I have to speed things up here, I feel that I am almost done here, Dumbledore got kicked from his pedestal, Voldy is one Horcrux from his next adventure, I am fucking rich, and in a few more years am shagging the female population of wizarding Britain.
"Kreacher! Come here!" called Sirius out loud.
A minute later an old ugly elf in dirty rags popped in: "Why is nasty blood traitor Master calling Kreacher? Poor Mistress will turn in her gave of shame."
I interrupted before it got out of hand: "Be silent, elf! By the look of you, that Mistress would turn in her grave if she knew how her elf shames House Black with those dirty rags you wear. Now listen carefully, is there an evil artifact in your Mistresses' home? So evil, it can not be destroyed normally? Answer to the Heir of House Black!"
The dirty elf comment hit home, elves can blush after all. He started wailing: "Kreacher tried to destroy the evil locket, Kreacher could not do Master Regi's command, Kreacher could not fulfill Master's last command."
Meh, let's put him out of his misery: "Bring the locket here Kreacher, we will destroy the evil in it. You can even watch them do it… that is if you remove that dirty rag and dress in something proper. Now go!"
Sirius looked at me slack-jawed and said: "Prongslet? Where did you learn to handle house elves like that? I never saw that nasty beast obey someone so fast."
I shrugged: "I read a book about house elves and visited the kitchen at Hogwarts. The elves like me, and I like them, it is that simple."
A prim and proper elf, in a brand new costume, including the Black Crest, delivered the last Horcrux and followed the goblins to the ritual chamber to see it cleansed. The locket went in my vault of course.
"Kreacher," I said to him, "If you can wait for a few years, then we will recover your Masters Locket. When we do, you can have it as a reward for your excellent service to House Black. Until then, I want you to clean the house so that we would not be ashamed to entertain visitors. Don't exhaust yourself doing it though. Now go."
"Sirius, elves are not nasty beasts," I lectured, "They want two things, something to do and affection from the family they are bonded with. I don't know what went wrong between you two, but I advise you to correct it."
"Mother ordered him to punish me all the time." confessed Sirius, "I hated him for it, I guess it became mutual after a time. It will be hard for me to like him, pup."
"Well, Sirius, I have a solution for that, do you want to hear it?" I asked, without waiting for his answer I continued, "At the moment, I am homeless, the cottage is confiscated by the ministry, and our mansion was destroyed by Voldy. Let me buy your Mothers old house, you can live in the manor you reclaimed from the Malfoy's. What do you think?"
Xxxxx
One week later: Here before you stands the proud owner of Grimmauld Place 12! I even got Dobby in the deal! To top it all, I know, I always had a soft spot for her, I bonded with Winky too. She was eager to have a home again, the company of two others was the cherry on top for her.
It took two weeks for a team of curse breakers to make the rooms and library Hermione safe proof, under the watchful eye of Kreacher, they removed the curses on the books and put an age spell on them instead. Only adults are allowed to open certain books. I know that Daphne, Tracey, and Lisa are book crazy too, but we can all agree that Hermione tops them all.
On one evening, a few weeks before Christmas, in the RoR I announced: "You know that I bought the house in London from Sirius, at the moment the curse breakers are finished removing the dangerous stuff, therefore you are all invited to spend the Christmas holiday there with me, or at least pay a visit."
I looked at Hermione: "You can bring your parents, the house is warded, so the ministry can't detect us doing Magic. You can show it to your folks. Sirius will be there to supervise. Nim? Can you be our chaperone? Please? Pretty please?"
Tonks grumbled: "You can bet I'll be there! Maybe I'll get some peace and quiet. I get hounded by every pureblood with money problems, even Charlie bloody Weasley started writing letters to me again. That tosser dropped me last year for a job in a dragon preserve, I bet he is sorry now."
Susan commented: "On one side I am sorry I missed that adventure, on the other side, looking at the amount of unwanted attention you all receive, I am glad I missed it. How many marriage contracts are offered to you, Daphne? Tracey?"
Daphne sighed: "Too many already, Susan. Some are downright scandalous, boys from age two to old men of eighty years old all demanding a contract as if we have to be grateful they offer it in the first place."
"Dad complained about it too," commented Tracey, "there are even some with compulsion charms on it to sign."
Hannah said: "Put an announcement in the Daily Prophet that you will sue those for Line theft. That will scare most of them off."
"Dad was glad I did not go down there with you, Harry," said Zack, "He went to see the Basilisk at Gringotts and said you were lucky to survive at all. He said that no amount of Galleons can bring the dead back to life, and it was not worth the risk. Although I would go down to the chamber with you if I was there."
"I bet Gran would kill me if I went along and got hurt," commented Neville.
Nim went to me and sat herself on my lap, she put her arms around me and said: "But our brave hero kept us safe. Girls, I have a solution for our problems, we spread the word that the five of us are betrothed to Harry. That will stop those bloody gold diggers."
I pinched her butt and complained: "Really, Nim? Blame it on Potter to hog all the wealthy girls? What did I do to you to deserve this?"
She slapped the back of my head: "You killed a Basilisk. That is what you did. Take responsibility for it."
This is the last time I play Santa god damned!
Xxxxx
I opened my eyes, and noticed that I sat in a car with a bunch of redheads… the inside of that car was clearly expanded to let them all fit inside. The question is: why am I in a car with the Weasleys?
I went to bed last night in Grimmauld Place 12 after Nim snogged me to wish me a happy new year and the others gave me a chaste kiss on the cheek.
I thought I was hallucinating when I saw words floating in front of me.
FIRST LAYER COMPLETED SUCCESSFULLY.
8 The Second Layer.
Crap! Does this mean I have to do this shit all over again? I thought I could end the term, there was still some unfinished business that I held back on, so I could prepare for the next level. I studied Magic like a zealot, the RoR presented all the good stuff, but with only these few months of study, it clipped my wings a lot.
I took stock of my situation, I am in a car with the Weasley clan, oh boy, this is the start of my second year and we are on the way to the train. That is going to suck balls, for a moment I considered letting it happen and flying to Scotland with Ron… that moment passed quickly though. Flying away in that car would be fun for an hour or two, the consequences that follow it are not.
We just left the Burrow I think, at least we are not in London yet, I closed my eyes and tried to remember my life, it slammed into my brain again, it hurts like hell... Or, is it my memories slamming into his brain?
My childhood is pretty much the same as in the First Level, I got sorted in Gryffindor, the Troll happened, Fluffy, Norberta, the whole bloody book happened! Word for fucking Word! Even the events from this summer! That bloody bint and fat ass starved me and Hedwig! Then the escape in the flying car and my stay at the Burrow.
What I do notice now, is that the Weasley parents ignored the obvious signs of starvation and abuse. A celebrity kid appears in the middle of the night, skin and bones, and dressed in rags. The way Mrs. Weasley brushes off the comments of the Twins tells me enough, they are in Dumbledore's pocket.
When we arrived at the station, everything happened like in canon, we bumped into the pillar and caused a ruckus.
At eleven o'clock, Ron panicked: "We missed our train! We are going to get expelled! How are we going to get there?"
Not with that bloody car we won't, I said: "The Leaky Cauldron is close by, we can go there and floo to the Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade."
Ron got his bright idea: "We take Dad's car! We can fly to Hogwarts, it will be an adventure!"
I shook my head: "Are you mental mate? First of all, that car is a relic, such a long trip will cause it to malfunction do you want our picture in the newspaper flying over London? I bet it will get your dad in trouble too."
I continued: "No, we go to the Leaky Cauldron and we floo to Hogsmeade we can even get a butterbeer or two."
We could have waited at the car for Mr. and Mrs. Weasley to return, but I have other plans to spend my day. The Leaky Cauldron is not far from the station, but dragging a big trunk and a birdcage along is tiresome, especially for a skinny brat like me, exhausted, we opened the door of the pub, the place was almost empty, and the few customers were leaving.
"Ron, I'm a bit tired," I said, "Let's take a break and buy some drinks, I have some money in my pocket. Do you want a butter beer too?"
When Ron nodded, I went to Tom, the barkeeper: "Two butterbeer please."
"My! Harry Potter!" He exclaimed, "Why are you not on the train, boy?"
"I don't know what happened, Tom," I answered, "The gate to the platform closed on us, we could not get through, we plan to floo to Hogsmeade and wait for the train to arrive."
"That is a good idea, Mr. Potter," said Tom, "Here, these are on the house, you can floo from here too."
"Sometimes fame has its benefits," I grinned at Ron. "Tom said the floo powder is on the house too."
"You go first Ron, I will follow," I said when we were standing at the fireplace. Ron shouted "The Three broomsticks!" and flooded away.
That got rid of one problem, I already have a history of getting out of the wrong fireplace, he will think it happened again.
I turned to Tom and said: "Mr. Tom, I realized I can use this opportunity to visit Gringotts, I don't have enough money on me, and I need some extra books. Can you shrink my trunk, please? It is too big to drag around, and it takes hours before the train arrives in Hogsmeade. With Lockhart at the bookstore, I missed out on some books I need for class."
Yeah, changing to runes and arithmancy next year, and I plan to study in advance. I am at the end of second-year level with all my spells anyway.
"That is smart thinking, Harry, but promise to stay in Diagon Alley." was his answer after he shrunk my trunk and spelled it with a featherweight.
I gathered my cloak and wand and took Hedwig with me to the brick wall… you know, if they say from the trash can, three bricks up and two across, did you ever see a brick wall? It is loaded with bricks! From the trash can they say, there are more than twenty brick that relates to that! What if they empty that can and put it a foot away from its original place? Nobody would get in! It was not that hard to find the correct bricks though. Years of tapping those bricks made them pretty obvious.
Once in the alley I set Hedwig loose and told her to wait out of sight. Finally! My first stop is Gringotts, I am ready to kick some bony ass.
Xxxxx
I approached a teller: "Good day Teller, may we do good business and let our enemies bleed out on the battlefield. I am in need to talk to my account manager if he is free. The name is Harry James Potter."
That was a nice greeting, don't you think? With enough profit and blood in it, Goblins love it.
"That it will be a good day for you, youngster will depend on if you really are Harry Potter. It will define that you are going to do good business or will bleed out. Follow Sharpwits to your account manager." was the grumpy Tellers response.
Crap, the first snag in the story, my account manager is a young goblin named Golddigger.
"Who are you, boy? Why are you not in school?" barked the digger.
I raised my eyebrow and asked: "Check your identifying Runes at your door, Goblin, they are malfunctioning if you don't know who I am. Now, tell me who are you? Are you my regular account manager? I expected someone more mature."
Golddigger paled, he did not expect I knew about those runes, "I got promoted last year, your previous account manager is retired." he answered.
"Who made him retire?" I asked, "I find it suspicious that my account manager is retiring the year I came into the wizarding world."
Unwillingly, he answered: "Your Magical Guardian made him retire and demanded a young manager for the position."
"I commend you for your honesty, Golddigger," I said, "Let me tell you something important to you, in five years I am an adult and don't need a Magic Guardian anymore. It is for you to decide that you dance five years to my Magic Guardian's tunes and get sacked afterward with a big Audit of your actions, or you work for MY best interests and keep your job for fifty more years. What will it be, Golddigger?"
The shocked face of Golddigger told me I nailed it. My comment of five versus fifty years delivered the message, don't fuck with Heir Potter… unless you are a girl and are in my bed, then I would say, Go, Girl! Yeahah! Yes, I accept all ages, from fifteen to ninety-five, although I use lube above seventy.
Golddigger sighed: "As your account manager I am honor bound to manage your account to your best interest Heir Potter, Your Magical Guardian demands that all transactions need his approval."
"Tell me, Golddigger," I said, "What are the procedures of Gringotts if an Heir suspects his Magical Guardian is abusing his position to steal from his or her accounts? Because I find the machinations of my Magical guardian highly suspicious." I glared at him and continued, "I also demand to speak to the previous account manager within the hour. If not, at age seventeen I will empty all my vaults and take my business elsewhere."
Golddigger punched a few buttons on his desk and growled something in Gobelydobbelly. A few minutes later, Blooddagger came into the office. Golddigger explained everything… I guess he does, I can't understand a word.
"Heir Potter, your account manager said you demanded to speak to me, well I am here, what do you want to know?" he asked.
"Did you ask for your retirement?" was my first question.
"No, I did not ask for it, they made me retire from my position," he answered.
"What do you think of Golddigger as your replacement? Will he do a good job?" was my second question.
Golddigger was sweating buckets when Blooddagger looked him up and down. "He will do for now," was Blooddagger's answer. Golddigger sagged in his chair, feeling the load of his back lifted.
"You have a right to be suspicious, Heir Potter," he continued, "Your Magic Guardian Dumbledore can demand another Account Manager, but he can not say who will take that position. The Potter accounts are managed by our clan for centuries. I trust that my Grandson will do a satisfactory job."
I glared at Golddigger: "You just could have said that he was your Grandpa! You got me worked up for nothing."
Blooddagger chuckled: "Beginners always follow everything to the letter, Heir Potter."
"Right, we wasted enough time, Blooddagger, can you stay and give some advice? I need my scar examined, it is a curse scar and I heard you employ curse breakers."
Blooddagger looked at his grandson, who nodded and pressed some buttons. From then on, everything happened fast, the curse breaker started cursing and shouting, which attracted five more Goblins that quite frankly used swear words that I never even heard in my old life.
Anyway, I ended up on a cold stone table with the Pig again. The old fogies did their song and dance again, and my first step to freedom is taken. While I was on the table, they removed the rest of the blocks and spells from my body, with Voldy gone, even my eyes got fixed, they were pissed when they saw the Mail block also blocked Gringotts Mail, that is something Dumbledore is going to regret I'll bet.
Xxxxx
Two hours later I was back in the office. Blooddagger, Golddigger, and a big one with fancy clothes were waiting for me.
"Heir Potter, this is account manager supervisor Slicer, we contacted him to report all the issues we discovered on your body," said Golddigger.
"Heir Potter," nodded Slicer, "The blocks, spells, and years of abuse and malnutrition made it clear that your Magical guardian is unfit for the job. We can not dictate what happens outside, but we can in Gringotts, I appointed Blooddagger as your guardian. He served your grandparents and your parents, I advice you to trust him too."
"Thank you Supervisor Slicer," I said, "For now I need a way to pay without carrying loads of Galleons, a way to pay my bills in the Muggle world, and some kind of purse that I can carry around for some pocket money."
"Golddigger can help you with that, I want to point out that you are allowed to wear your Heir ring from your eleventh birthday. I'll leave you to it." Slicer left the office after that.
While Golddigger made the arrangements I found out that I possessed 20% of the Daily rubbish.
"Blooddagger," I said, "I heard that the Black's have shares of the Daily Prophet too, can you ask the Lord or Heir to sell them to me, or others that are willing to part with their shares? I am tired of their stories about me."
"I'll find out in a minute, Heir Potter." Blooddagger left.
I might as well get all things done. Golddigger presented me with a mokeskin pouch, and a credit card: "In the pouch are five hundred Galleons and a thousand pounds. The pouch is weightless and with a drop of your blood only you can get something out. Just think about the amount of money you want, and it will appear in your hands. For big sums, you can use your ring." Very handy indeed.
Blooddagger returned with an old Goblin. "Heir Potter, meet the Black account manager Throathcutter."
Throathcutter nodded at me: "This is unusual Heir Potter, my ledgers are telling me that you are Heir Primary of House Black. We knew that Sirius is the new Lord Black, I did not realize he made you his Heir. Can you put the Heir ring on to see if it accepts you?"
Tadaa! Step two is taken to World domination! I rule! I have a shiny ring! I am bloody rich!... I have to get that lazy elf clean Grimmauld Place 12 again.
Throathcutter said: "You asked that House Black have shares of the Daily Prophet, we do, 25% of them. At the moment Lucius Malfoy is using these shares to press his agenda through, claiming that his son Draco will be the next Lord Black."
"Did the Prophet bring in any Profits in the last ten years?" I asked?
"No, it is always even money or a loss up to 5%" reported Throathcutter.
"Well," I grinned, "Then we better cut those losses, won't we? Golddigger, Throathcutter is selling 25% of the Daily Prophet to House Potter, don't notify the editor of the change yet."
I gathered my thoughts and simulated some of my ideas in my mind, then I grinned and said: "Now, this is what I want to happen about Lord Black…"
Xxxxx
I had lunch in the Alley, after that I went on a shopping spree. Yes, you guessed it, I went for every Fan Fic trope, the multi-compartment trunk, with a library and big apartment, of course, the apartment even blocks Magic detection! Equipped with shrinking and featherweight it is so much better than dragging that big trunk around, my old trunk went inside the apartment, I bet it blocks all tracking spells too.
Three leather book bags with extension charms and featherweight are a must-have, although Ron won't appreciate them as much as Hermione, in an afterthought, I bought one for Ginny too, I have to find a way to get that diary, bribing a girl is frowned upon, but I can trade it for that diary, so totally acceptable.
At Olivander I bought a few wand holsters and upgraded my potion set at the apothecary, I noticed that a lot of the quality of the potions depends on the tools you brew them in, maybe that is why Hagrid got me the cheapest stuff.
The posh robes from Twilight are so much better than my usual rags, the bookstore still had a lot of course books, I bought them for all seven years, weightless trunk for the win!
At the jeweler's shop, I bought several rings, bracelets, and necklaces with detection and protection Runes on them. No more mind whammies or potions for this guy. They even sold glasses that let you see in the dark like it was a sunny day, and even detect spells. I bought two of them of course! I am not old enough to ask for X-ray glasses, but am surer as hell research the spells for them!
I collected my old trunk, dumped my old clothes in the bin, and stored it back in my apartment, then I went Muggle. I took a cab to Harrods, I managed to convince a salesgirl with my sad face that both my parents are at work, and got four hundred pounds to spend on a new wardrobe. That got me the basics, underwear, jeans, shirts, and shoes. They would go suspicious if I begin to throw money around.
On the way back to the Leaky, I let the cab stop at a pay phone, "Hello Petunia, guess what? I recently found out I have a lot of money, and I have decided to spend some on you." I said with a cheery voice.
"How much money boy?" she greedily asked.
"Oh, about twenty thousand pounds. That is ten thousand for you and ten thousand for Vernon. You see, if you still live at Privet drive four at Christmas, I will set that bounty on your heads. When they find out how you treated me, there will be a lot of volunteers to hunt you down, don't you think? Goodbye, Aunty." I hung up with the screaming voice of Petunia in my ears. Boy! That felt good!
Would I set a bounty on them? Nah, of course not! I tell the papers my story and their address, and the angry mob will kill them for free. Cruel? Probably, it is as cruel as putting a one-year-old in a cupboard, and treating it like shit, fuck them!
All set and done, I flood to the Three Broomsticks and sat on a bench at the station waiting for the train to arrive, Ron was nowhere in sight. Ah! The carriages are here! Better yet, I sit and wait in a carriage and read a book. All in all, I had a productive day.
Xxxxx
The train unloaded his passengers, two older Slytherin girls boarded my carriage, a blond and a red one, the red one said: "Ah? Our missing person decided to show himself? You had a lot of people looking for you Potter."
I sighed: "Yeah, being popular can be a burden, sometimes I just long to sit quietly before a fireplace with a pretty girl in my arms."
She chuckled: "Do you even know what to do with a girl, Potter?"
I shrugged: "I don't know, I saw some adult Muggle movies this summer, but I doubt some stuff they showed was even possible, I mean three men at the same time? And then the collars and whips, clamps on all sorts of body parts, are any of you familiar with that?"
The Slytherins sat there shell-shocked, finally, she asked: "Three? At once? How?"
"Well," as I was happy to explain, "the first one went in the regular way, the second one, I think he used a lot of lube went into her bum, while that woman sucked on the third one's dick."
I looked innocently at the Slytherins and said: "What I did not understand is why some of those girls liked to be spanked, I mean, getting bent over someone's knees and getting your naked bum slapped is fun? Maybe because he sometimes put his fingers in her snatch, but what do I know about girls right?"
The blond Slytherin said: "Muggles do all that? Do they like that? Getting slapped on their bum?"
I smiled: "If you never tried it, how do you know you like it or not? In that movie, the girl liked it very much, she even squirted when she had an orgasm. I have a question if you allow it, do girls like it when someone licks their pussy? In those movies they did, hmm, I got to try it at least once."
There was no answer, just blushing, I grinned and offered: "So, if you want to explore that kind of play, I volunteer for the job. Ah, we arrived, let me help you down… ladies, riding with you was my pleasure."
I am curious if they are gossipers. Where did I see those movies you ask? Ok, if you ask that, you are not yet ten years old, or you are an old geezer without a PC.
Yeah! Snape was waiting for me: "Potter! Where have you been? Were you too special to take the train like other students? Well, answer the question!"
I shrugged: "As Ron Weasley undoubtedly already explained, the gate to platform 9 ¾ was blocked, we went to the leaky cauldron and flooded to the Three Broomsticks… Sir."
"You insufferable brat! Then why did Weasley arrive hours before you? Was it fun for you to let everyone search for you?" he fumed.
"Not really, sir, does the staff look for every student that missed the train?" I asked.
He glared at me, that was when I noticed my necklace warmed up, peeping creep is trying to invade my mind, he bounced back when my necklace kicked him out.
I commented: "I would stop invading my mind sir, what you are doing is illegal, and you might end up in Azkaban. And for the record, I can find my own way to the Castle, sir, I am not a five year old." a lot of students witnessed Snape's head snap back and heard my comment, that is definitively one for the rumor mill.
Xxxxx
I went inside the Great Hall to my table and sat down next to Ron. Yeah, sitting opposite of him once was one of my worst ideas, if that bloke didn't wear shoes, he would use his feet to shove food in that bottomless pit he calls a mouth.
Hermione opened her bag of questions: "Harry! Where were you? We could not find you on the train, so we had the prefects search the train for you, What happened? Ron said you did not follow him to the Three Broomsticks…"
I held my hand up to stop her: "In a nutshell, Hermione, I missed the train, got out of the wrong floo again, and went back to the leaky Cauldron where I flood to the Three Broomsticks. Thank you by the way for letting every prefect get annoyed at me. My life became so much better."
"But Harry! We could not find you! We had to let them look for you!" she exclaimed.
"Yes, Hermione! You looked and did not find me, the rest is bullshit. I am potty trained, I even can read maps! Oh! I am older than five years!" I sighed, "Look, Hermione, missing the train is not the end of the world, I got here on time, the rest is nobody's business." I said.
Ron grumbled: "Tell that to the professors mate, they panicked as if the Minister was abducted. They questioned me for an hour."
I shrugged: "You could have stayed in Hogsmeade and waited for the train to arrive. When I thought about that, I went shopping a bit, I needed a new wardrobe, my cousin's clothes did not exactly fit me. Ah! Sorting begins!"
I put a bag on the chair next to me and watched the sorting, Bloody Creepy got sorted in our house, finally, it was Ginny's turn, strange, a hatstal? Maybe Tommy is already in her head, Griffindor! Was the final verdict; shyly, she went to our table.
"Hey, Ginny!" I called out, "I saved you a seat!" while patting the chair next to me.
The poor thing almost got a stroke, The Harry Potter saved her a seat? The sky must have dropped down! Pigs can fly!
She sat next to me, I gave her a one-armed hug and said: "Maybe you already know that, but never sit in front of Ron."
That made her relax a bit: "Yes, I knew that, and also, stay out of the range of his food. He bites."
"So, are you going to be the next Mrs. Potter?" I asked, "Are you up for the job? Did you read the necessary books? I have to warn you though, Harry Potter and the Angry Dragon drew a wrong picture of me, I would never kill that angry dragon, I would tame it you know."
Ginny elbowed me: "I knew they are fantasy books when I was eight years old, Harry. I just liked them."
"Ah, food, dig in future Mrs. Potter, watch out for Mr. Weasley's claws." I joked.
"I'mm Hwungwy Hawwy," Ron said with his mouth full of food. Merlin, I miss the Ravenclaw table already.
McGonagall came to our table: "Mr. Potter, the headmaster needs to see you after dinner."
I rolled my eyes and said out loud: "What is so special about missing a train? It is not the end of the world you know! I never got lost, Professor, I could just summon the Knight bus and get here with no problem. Is the headmaster calling every student for such minor details?"
She glared at me: "The headmaster doesn't need to explain his reasons to a student Mr. Potter. I will come for you after dinner."
When I am done with him he won't need to explain shit to me. I have several bones to pick with that old man.
While McGonagall went away, I sighed and said to Ginny: "Sorry future Mrs. Potter, our first stroll through the Castle is for tomorrow. I hope you can wait that long, I don't want to lose you to a Dick or Tom before I got a chance to declare my undying devotion."
Ginny started to play along: "You better hurry Mr. Potter, this Lady is in high demand, and can't waste her time on the half-baked attempts of common louts."
I thumped my chest and proclaimed: "I will spare no effort to reach that goal, my fair Maiden. Even when your brothers will try to stop me, I will prevail!" I whispered: "I won't hurt them badly of course."
Ginny giggled: "My brothers trying to stop you? I can see that happening, my knight, but, were you not pursuing Lady Granger?"
I let my head hang down: "Alas, I can not deny it, my Fair Maiden. Her brilliance blinded me, her Witt dazzled me, and her beauty reached heights that only you can compare. And as you can see, she has a pretty blush when I compliment her."
Ginny shook her head: "Then you must choose, dear sir, no Maiden wants to share a husband."
I nodded: "That will be my burden to bear, having to choose between two bright Stars is almost impossible, it will need time."
Hermione exploded: "Can you two stop dragging me into this? Harry? What has happened to you? You are acting completely different from before."
"Aye, my other future Mrs. Potter, a lot happened today," I said, and smiled evilly, "I transferred all my negativity to a pig, and had it slaughtered. It lifted the veil from my eyes so I could admire your brilliance, and bask in your glorious presence."
I turned to Ginny and asked: "Too much? I think I went over the top with the basking."
Ginny shrugged: "You can't go wrong with basking, Mr. Potter. I would like that my husband basks in my presence."
"Whut, ish Baskwing?" asked Ron with his mouth full of food.
I patted his back: "Tonight, dear brother-in-law, I will give you: The Talk. Believe me, you will never be the same man as before."
I stood up and said: "The fun is over, The Cat girl is here to escort me to Saruman the White."
9 True colors.
Hermione frowned: "I think you meant Gandalf The Grey, Harry. Saruman turned evil."
"Exactly, Hermione," I shot back, "Although in this case, I had to say Dumbledore The Rainbow, but that would put the Gay community in a bad light. Yes, I am coming, professor, I will skip dessert for this Very Important Meeting, although, doesn't the Headmaster have to do his speech? I can eat my apple pie until then."
"Come along Mr. Potter," Said McGonagall, "I want to have a few words with you in advance."
Along the way, she began to berate me: "You behaved completely irresponsibly today, Mr. Potter, you put yourself in real danger by heading off alone, you had us all worried sick."
"We spent all day looking for you and feared the worst," she raged on, "expect a month of detention for this."
Wtf? Who the fuck does she think she is? My Grandma?… in several Fan Fiction she is actually his Gran, I better ask it first before I wax her ears. Nah, I'll wait until I have them all together, anyway, this was Ron & Harry's Excellent Adventure! Nothing can take that away from us! Crap they can! Obliviate and you remember a boring train ride, bummer.
At the headmaster's office, Minnie was still pissed off, I let my eyes wander over the place and spotted the Phoenix, looking at it closely, it is kind of a cross between a peacock and a turkey with red and gold feathers. Curiously I took a closer look, his? Her? Eyes were bright, there was intelligence in it.
"So," I asked, "You can carry heavy loads, with your tail… what if someone doesn't want to come along? Does it pull your tail feather off? Oh! I bet Olivander did that to you! I have a wand with a piece of your ass.'
"MR POTTER!" came an angry voice from behind, "Leave Fawkes be! Come here and stand before the desk.'
Whut? Are we in the nineteenth century? Yeah, I guess their mentality is stuck there, that Scottish woman is getting on my nerves, I was told Scottish girls were hot and sassy, this one however is frigid and stiff.
Finally, Saruman and Sourpuss came into the office. His power play is impressive, calmly he took place behind his desk, while Snape acted as a bad cop and strode past me and took position to the side, his angry face activated.
"Harry, my boy," he said while he put his elbows on his desk and put a hand under his shin, "We have a lot to discuss today."
"I agree," I cut him off, "Did you notify the DMLE already? When are they coming?"
"No, my boy, we did not," he said puzzled, "there is no need to call them in, why would you ask that?"
"Well it is illegal to invade someone else mind, and that is what Snape did when I arrived at the castle. A few years in Azkaban I am told."
"Professor Snape, Harry, I am sure you were mistaken, my boy, there is no need to disturb the DMLE with minor details."
"That is not what the jeweler said to me when he sold me this necklace, Headmaster, he said invading the mind of a minor is at least two years in Azkaban, he said that the necklace will heat up and kick the invader out." I looked at Snape, "And that is exactly what happened, a lot of students witnessed it. So, when are you going to call the DMLE? Sir? I for one would be happy to see him gone, and three-quarters of Hogwarts students hope it as well."
"You insufferable brat! I have you expelled for this!" raged Snape, "You are as arrogant and pampered as your father!"
I pointed with my thumb to Snape while looking at Dumbledore: "And that is why I want him gone. My dad is Dead for eleven years, and he is taking his revenge on me. Everyone hates that bully, no, Neville is scared to death of him. And to be honest sir, even a donkey would be a better teacher than him."
"Surely you are exaggerating, my boy, Professor Snape is the youngest Potion Master of this century, I have complete faith in his skills." tried Dumbledore to calm me down. "we are not here to discuss Professor Snape, but to talk about what you did today. You were supposed to be on the train, and Mr. Weasley came to the castle hours before you. We have been searching for you all day. Where have you been, my boy?"
"Sir? Why are you calling me my boy? You are calling Ron Mr. Weasley. Are you a relative of me?" As I tried to divert his attention.
"No, my boy, but I consider you like a grandchild, one I never had of my own." he chuckled.
"Well Grandpa, then it is a good thing that you never had grandchildren because you suck as a grandpa. Please call me Mr. Potter from now on sir."
"MR POTTER! Why I never heard something so disrespectful in my life!" you better apologize at once! Shouted McGonagall.
I glared at her: "You never heard worse? Well, I did! They called me freak or boy for years! I learned my name on the first day of elementary school! During the beatings I got from Uncle Vernon there was, worthless creep, and useless little shit. Do you want to hear some more bad words? Well, I call the shit faces that dropped me off on a doorstep in the freezing cold at night, assholes, criminals, vicious bandits, for dropping me in that hell hole! So no, I won't apologize!" the last sentences I almost screamed into their stunned faces.
"You must have known how I was treated there, my letter was addressed to the cupboard under the stairs." I said to McGonagall "I suffered ten years of starvation and abuse, and nobody cared. So why on earth would you care now? You didn't do shit before, and I don't give a shit now."
I turned to Dumbledore: "I paid a visit to Gringotts and had some illuminating conversations with my new and old account managers. Did you know they employ curse breakers, sir? Well, they did find plenty of curses on me, most of them were cast by you. They gave me a box of potions to correct my body to what it is supposed to be. Oh, by the way, Blooddagger is my Guardian for the Gringotts business. They are quite angry at you, sir."
I turned and walked out the door, I had to hurry before they get their wits back online. Meh, I have enough dirt on them to get them off my back. Throwing a tantrum is a risk, but the accusations I made were spot on and cut in some nerves, it made McGonagall speechless, and it made Grandpa blush.
Xxxxx
Ron and Hermione were waiting for me, I crawled through the portrait… Bloody Ravenclaws have a door ffs! Griffindors are getting shafted in my opinion.
I commented: "Those other founders must have hated Godrick, they let his students crawl on hands and knees at least two times a day. It is humiliating if you ask me."
It didn't stop Hermione to fire her questions though: "What did the Headmaster say? Are you going to be expelled? Are you punished, Harry? You did explain it did you?…"
I held my hand up: "Future Mrs. Potter, as a prospected spouse you are allowed to question me. However, give your Future Husband the chance to bloody answer them!"
I sighed: "Hermione, I limit you to two questions, then you wait for an answer, is that ok?" I softly said "I did not get punished, I told them that they didn't care for ten years about me, so they don't need to start now. That is all that I want to say about it tonight, perhaps later, ok?"
"Ok, but stop teasing me with that Future Mrs. Potter," she said, "It is not funny."
I shrugged: "Think about it Hermione, you are my best friend, so there is a chance that we end up getting married. Or you could marry Ron, Neville, or Dean? It will take years before you know who you are in love with."
I stretched: "Well, I am off to bed. I'm tired it was a long day."
Crap, I have to share the room with that rat. I'll do something about it tomorrow.
Xxxxx
The next morning I woke up early and waited for Ginny to come down. When she saw me, her face lit up, and she came to sit next to me.
"Hello future Mrs. Potter," I said, "did you sleep well? I have a few gifts for you if that is alright. You see, as a friend of mine, you will draw the attention to yourself. Well, there are people that can read your thoughts and memories. Snape can do that, I found out yesterday."
I turned serious: "When he looks into your eyes, there is a high chance he is reading your mind. Think about it, he can see the memory when you look in the mirror after a shower. Sitting on the toilet, telling your deepest secrets to your best friend." I presented a necklace, "I bought this for my friends, it prevents mind reading and heat up when someone wants to invade your mind. There are a lot of cursed objects that can do that you know. Here, let me put it on. I have one for Hermione too."
Yeah, I better tell that upfront or she is browsing through the bride catalog.
"I also bought some book bags for us, here is yours, I hope you like unicorns, the inside is expanded, and weightless, so you can haul everything with you to class." I looked up, "Hey, good morning love… too soon? Never matter, here is a gift for you, a new book bag. With a kneazle on it, I bet you like cats."
Hermione studied the bag: "You didn't have to do that, Harry,"
"Ah but I did honey," I grinned, "Consider it an early birthday. I saw those bags in the Alley yesterday, and I bought two for Ron and Future Mrs. Potter, as a thank-you for saving me from the Dursleys, I could not let that pass to buy you one too. After all, you are more important than Ron to me, you don't snore. Yep, that is a game-breaker. Besides, you gave me my first-ever hug, at least one that I can remember."
That is sappy enough? Now I have to con the necklace on her. I better wait a bit, the common room was filling up and the first people were crawling through the portrait.
"Hey!" I exclaimed, "Godrick was not a fool after all! He let us crawl so we can look at the girls' butt when we crawl behind them! Go Godrick! My Hero!"
All the girl's heads snapped to me and looked shocked, I shrugged, "Why else do we crawl on hands and knees through a portrait? Was it so hard to make a door? Now we can admire the females' anatomy up close."
I heard a voice: "George bloody Weasley! Don't you dare look to up my skirt or I'll hex your bits off!"
"He is Fred, I tell you! Stay away from my bits, Angelina!" came from behind.
"No way! I was supposed to be George today Fred!… hey! I am supposed to look up Angelina's skirt today! It was my tur… I'll shut up now."
One of the twins whispered in my ear: "Harrikins, you will regret what you said in a few years, now they will pay attention to who is behind them. Us blokes are not happy with you at the moment."
I whispered back: "They will forget all about it by the time I am interested in that kind of stuff, so I'm good."
Hermione slapped her book bag at me: "I will remind them of it pervert! Now, on your hands and knees in front of me."
Xxxxx
Ron overslept and came in late for breakfast, he complained: "Why didn't you wake me mate?"
I shrugged: "Well for one, I am your mate, not your Mommy, I woke you up, and your turned around and slept further. You are a big boy, and I am not your babysitter."
With a sour face, McGonagall handed the schedules out, no comments? I must have struck a nerve last night. Not that I care about it, my rant was solely to get the attention away from my actions yesterday.
"Oh, no! Ginny, my dear, I fear I am going to lose Hermione's affection today! My competition is the brightest smile! Three times in a row! The perfect smile, the trimmed hair! The sparkle on his teeth… how can a low life like me compare against all that?"
Ginny comforted me: "You are a Hero too, Harry, everyone knows that.'
I shook my head and sighed: "Alas, I even killed the angry dragon and saved that village, it can't win against that smile. Even taming that Nundu, when I was six years old, is not enough, I must admit defeat, that perfect hair and the sparkle on those teeth is a killer combination."
Ginny patted my arm: "I won't stray my knight, you still have me."
I grinned: "She will come crawling back, and I will be right behind her." Bad joke! That pat on my arm became a stomp. "Not funny, Harry!"
"Ok, ok, you are right, sorry Hermione, but I must warn you, Lockhart is a complete twat."
"You can't say something like that, Harry! Look at all the things he has done!" she protested, "read his books and you know how skilled he is."
"Girl, you are lining yourself up for a very big I Told You So! If you keep on believing everything you read in books." meh, what do I care, he will probably focus on the Newt students to shag.
Here is ERROL! That poor owl flew in with a red letter right to… Me? Wtf?
"HARRY POTTER! HOW COULD YOU WANDER ALL DAY IN THE STREE…" That was as far as she got, my incendo burned the letter prematurely.
I looked at Percy and cooly said: "Percy? Can you remind your mother that I am not her son, and I hate to be humiliated in front of all the students. If she can't write a normal letter, then she better not write one at all."
I stood up and left the Hall, stupid bint, stay a week at her house and she thinks she can control me? If it wasn't for that fucking Basilisk and Tom Riddle, I would not even pay attention to Ginny, no, I would hound Greengrass and Davis, or Turpin. Although Turpin is a claw, the two others are snakes… I'll hog the Basilisk for myself this time. At the first wizengamot session, which is in two weeks, I'll be basilisk Hunting again.
I'm going to drive Dumbledore crazy, who said I can't make friends with a Ghost? Was it this bathroom Hermione was crying in? I will visit Myrtle every day, twice, that alert charm will drive him mad.
Xxxxx
Sigh, what is Lockhart's favorite color? Who the fuck cares?
What is his greatest wish? To kill something himself for a change.
I could not take it anymore and ripped the questionnaire into pieces, stood up, and left the room. Ok, I am still a bit upset with that howler. Dealing with idiots is not my forte. Maybe because I am one myself… probably.
At lunch, McGonagall came to our table: "Mr. Potter, why did you leave Professor Lockhart's class today? It is mandatory to attend all classes, twenty points from Gryffindor, and don't let it happen again."
"Professor McGonagall, questions like what is your favorite color? Or your greatest wish? If you find these questions appropriate for a Dada class, then I have to find a better school. I read his books, in the year he spent with that yeti, he banished that Banshee in Ireland and fought with a Werewolf in Albania, on top of that, he did two book sign sessions and three interviews in Teen Witch Weekly. That man is a fraud. My parents didn't pay for this kind of education."
I looked at her and said: "Read his books, Professor, if you can point me to one working spell, except for his grooming spells, then I will attend his classes without protest. More, I bet ten Galleons you can't find one working spell to vanquish the monsters he claimed to have killed."
"Ah," I said, "It is almost nap time, oh no, it's History class." I joked, "Then two hours of getting insulted and humiliated. This is almost a perfect day."
"Twenty points from Gryffindor and a week detention with me, Mr. Potter. Mind your tongue. You are here to learn not to run your mouth off on every occasion."
I looked into her eyes and said, "Then perhaps you should provide us with competent teachers, Professor. maybe we will learn a thing or two in here."
It got me an extra month of detention and fifty points from Gryffindor. But she could not miss hearing the Here-Here!, and That is right! From all sides.
Did you know that staying awake in Bin's class is an achievement? Only Hermione paid full attention; the rest had a glazed look in their eyes, at least the ones that didn't sleep.
Suppose you put it together, flying lessons, DADA, Potions, History, next year add Divination, Muggle studies, and care for creatures, that are seven worthless classes. In that case, I would like to know if I can learn French, they have Veela at Beaubatons.
Ron got his book bag, he was moderately pleased with it, I think he rather wanted a new broom. When I presented him with a bracelet to prevent mind reading, he refused. "I am not that interesting mate, who wants to read my mind anyway?"
I shrugged: "Snape, for example, he can sift through your memories at will. See for yourself, look in his eyes, and think very hard what a wanker he is."
That lesson cost Griffindor fifty points. Ron silently accepted the bracelet. Meh, I could not care less. I decided to be a rebel. I want to question everything and protest all the injustice.
Xxxxx
"Myrtle? Hello?" I shouted out loud, "Are you in today, or are you piped?" bad joke again? It is not my day today.
Myrtle rushed out of her toilet, flooding the floor, yuck. "What is a boy doing here? This is a girls-only bathroom!"
"Oh? Are there mixed bathrooms? Where?" I eagerly asked.
"The prefects' bathroom is mixed, boy, you have to be in your fifth year and have a prefects badge."
"Ah, is that so." I went outside, turned around, and went back in, "Myrtle? What do you do for fun around here?"
"I travel through the pipes," she answered.
She started giggling, at my fifth time going in and out of the bathroom, "So you know there is an alert for boys at the door. Dumbledore sometimes comes rushing in if a Slytherin boy enters this bathroom."
"That is good to know, see you tomorrow, Myrtle. I have detention in a minute."
To rile a teacher up, you can do two things, be a jackass in his or her class, or completely ignore her. That is not my experience speaking, I heard some of my friends complain about it… yes, I have friends, not many I admit… bite me.
The teacher usually takes revenge and lets the student do the most mind-numbing task there is... Writing lines. Two hours I must mind my manners. Well, it wasn't with a blood quill, that is a plus.
Xxxxx
Back in our common room, I dropped down next to Hermione: "Hermione? Is your favorite color Pink? No? Blue? Red? Lilac? Green! No? Rainbow! Aah! You are a Gothic! So it is Black!"
I grinned: "Sorry Hermione, take this necklace, I gave Ginny one too, Ron has a bracelet. It protects against mind magic, like confundus spells, and warns against potions too."
"Do you really think I need one, Harry?" she asked.
"Snape used a mind spell on me yesterday, Hermione, my necklace got hot and when it kicked him out of my head his head jerked backward, so yes you need it," I explained.
I found some disturbing things out yesterday at Gringotts, Hermione," I softly said, "I asked for a curse breaker to examine my scar, they discovered a multitude of problems on me. My scar had very dark Magic in it, that should have been removed eleven years ago. My Magic was blocked twice, once by my parents, which should have been removed at seven or eight years old, and a nasty block, cast by Dumbledore when I was five or six years old. That bastard knew my home situation, and that fuck didn't do shit about it."
"Language, Harry!" said Hermione.
"Sod it, Hermione, did you know that I was happy to work around the house when I was five years old? It was that, or sitting in my cupboard in the dark. They put a light in it so I could do my homework in there. So excuse my swearwords if I talk about the asshole that put me there."
Hermione hugged me with tears in her eyes: "Oh Harry! That is horrible! And Dumbledore put you there? Did nobody say something?"
"A few teachers did, they got transferred to another school. And it all comes to one man, Dumbledore."
I sighed, "Enough about the sad stuff, Hermione? Are those boobs you are pressing against me? Hmm, soft."
"Stop trying to embarrass me you prick," she said while she kept hugging me, "I need this hug as much as you do."
"We are two lonely creatures aren't we?" I softly said, "desperately looking for something or someone to care about, and then when we have it, we are afraid to lose it, so we do everything possible to keep it, even if we deep down know it is wrong to hang on."
With her head still at my neck, she asked: "Who are you talking about?"
"Ron," I answered "he is a friend, but last year he wasn't exactly easy to be around, he is rude to you, even if he doesn't mean to hurt your feelings, his rude comments are just doing that. He was the very first friend I got, funny, he was the first person that sat in my compartment, if Lavender or Parvati would have been in that compartment, I would have latched at them, and been their friend."
"Are we still friends, Harry?" she asked, "I am bossy, always asking too many questions, if not for that Troll, would we became friends?"
I rubbed her back, "We are friends now, Hermione, Ron is still my friend too, maybe we stick together until we graduate, or we drift apart and get other friends. Or, we get more friends, we don't have to be exclusive, we can be friends with Padma Patil, or Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, Neville, some Slytherins even."
"You forgot Ginny, you were teasing her a lot yesterday and this morning, is there a reason for that?" she asked.
I shrugged: "At the Burrow, she was starstruck by me, she could not say a word if I as much friendly looked at her, she freaked out and ran to her room. So last night I got her out of her shell. She is quite funny isn't she?"
Hermione released her death grip and looked me in the eyes: "So, is she your future Mrs. Potter?"
"Ask me that in five or six years, Hermione, it might as well be you, or I could marry you both. That is possible too."
"How could that be possible, Harry, that is against the law." protested Hermione. "Are you serious?"
I showed my rings: "I am the heir to two very old Houses, the most Ancient and Most Noble Houses of Potter and Black, it seems we go back to the Romans and Greek. Black is rumored to date back to Egypt. Wizarding law allows a wife for every house, to keep the line separated. My account manager explained it to me. That or the wife has to bare four boys, they say an Heir and a Spare for each. Keep the Black Heir a secret for now please."
I shrugged: "It might not come to that, the Lord Black is still alive, he is in Azkaban for the moment, but he might sire some offspring. Hey! Didn't we say we skip the serious stuff? What do you think about your book bag? Quite handy isn't it?"
"It is the best gift ever, Harry!" she sheered, "I carry all my school books and equipment in it, and it weighs practically nothing at all!"
It is nice if you have someone to talk to.
Xxxxx
The next day, the Daily Prophet headlined
New Management for your trusty Newspaper!
Dear readers, yesterday Gringotts notified us that a group of Heirs that wants to remain anonymous managed to acquire a majority of shares of this newspaper. Currently, they possess 56% of the shares in their joint governance. To reassure our readers, they expressed that their policy will stay the same as before, namely to report the truth, or at least as close as possible to the truth.