Lily Evans walked out of the double Transfiguration class feeling completely drained. Her brain felt like mush from Professor McGonagall's relentless lecture about the fine art of turning inanimate objects into living ones. She hadn't even packed her books yet when a blur of motion brushed past her shoulder. Ren shot out of the classroom like a bullet, her robes whipping behind her. The girl didn't even glance back, as though the classroom itself might set her on fire if she lingered another second.
Lily blinked, momentarily startled. Ren was always like that, mysterious, intense, and apparently allergic to the concept of small talk. Everyone knew she loathed Transfiguration, or maybe she just couldn't stand McGonagall's sharp gaze. Either way, she was gone before the echo of the dismissal bell even faded.
Lily sighed, slumping her shoulders. She carefully gathered her parchment and notes, sliding them into her satchel with the same caution she used when handling potions ingredients. Her handwriting from the lecture looked like it had been written mid-earthquake, but at least she'd survived.
The hallway outside was flooded with students heading toward lunch, voices bouncing off the stone walls. Lily turned a corner near the Charms corridor and there he was. Severus Snape. Her best friend.
He emerged from the opposite end, pale as ever, his black robes billowing like storm clouds. Lily's instinct was to wave, but before she could, his voice sliced through the air.
"Bloody mudblood, watch your step," he snarled at a fellow Slytherin girl who had accidentally stepped on the hem of his oversized robe.
The girl's face twisted with disgust. "Excuse me?" she snapped, glaring before storming off.
Lily froze mid-step. Her stomach tightened. That word, it wasn't just cruel, it was hers. She wanted to believe she'd misheard, but she knew she hadn't. Her hand hovered awkwardly at her side, unsure whether to wave or walk away.
Then Severus looked up and spotted her. His expression changed in an instant; the bitterness vanished, replaced by an almost sheepish smile. He lifted a hand in a small, hesitant wave. Lily, against her better judgment, smiled back.
"Going to lunch?" he asked casually, as if he hadn't just spat a slur that could've burned the air between them. His tone was soft, friendly like the Severus she always knew from childhood, not the one wrapped in darkness and bad company.
"Yeah," she said simply. It was the only word she could manage.
They fell into step, descending the grand staircase. The chatter of students filled the space around them, but Lily barely heard it. Her thoughts were heavy and tangled. She couldn't stop replaying that moment, his voice, that word, the way it rolled so easily off his tongue.
She didn't even notice when the staircase began to shift beneath her. The steps swung sideways, revealing a dangerous gap below.
"Lily!" Severus's hand shot out, grabbing her arm and pulling her back.
Her breath caught in her throat as her feet scraped against stone. "Oh—thanks," she muttered, steadying herself.
He frowned. "You're distracted. Everything alright?"
She nodded quickly, eyes fixed on the moving staircase rather than his face. "Yeah. I'm fine."
By the time they reached the Great Hall, Lily was more than ready for a distraction. The smell of roasted meat, warm bread, and pumpkin juice filled the air. Her eyes scanned the room automatically and landed on Ren.
The girl was sitting by herself at the far end of the Gryffindor table, absolutely demolishing a turkey leg. Grease smeared her lips, her bangs stuck to her forehead, and she looked utterly unbothered by the world. Lily had never seen anyone look so unsightly and charming at the same time.
Lily turned to Severus. "I'll see you later," she said abruptly, not waiting for a reply.
She crossed the hall and slid into the seat beside Ren. "Hey," she greeted, her tone soft but hopeful.
Ren looked up briefly, gave a curt nod, and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "Hi," she mumbled, already turning back to her food.
"You could've walked with me," Lily said after a pause, trying to sound casual. She'd thought, maybe after everything, after the late-night study sessions, the help she'd given Ren in Potions, they were at least somewhat friendly.
Ren raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
Lily blinked. "Just because."
Ren went back to her turkey, uninterested. The Marauders had just entered the hall, laughter following them like a second shadow. They took their usual seats a few places down, loud and effortlessly magnetic. One of the Gryffindor Quidditch boys, Lily couldn't remember his name shot her a flirtatious grin. She ignored him, stabbing at her mashed potatoes instead.
"I'm beginning to think I have issues, you know," Lily said suddenly, voice barely above the noise of the hall. Ren didn't look up, but she made a vague noise of acknowledgment.
"I heard Severus call someone a mudblood," Lily continued, the words spilling out faster now. "Right before he saw me. And I'm his friend. I am a mudblood. So what does that make me? A hypocrite?" Her tone cracked with quiet frustration as she absentmindedly poked at her food.
Ren finally spoke, not looking up. "Yeah."
Lily blinked. "You agree that I'm a hypocrite?"
"Yep."
Lily sighed, the weight of the word hitting harder when said so casually. "Even with you—it's the same thing. You're not exactly a good friend to me either, but I still think you are."
Ren choked mid-bite, coughing as she swallowed. "We're not friends," she said flatly once she recovered. "We're dormmates."
Lily turned her head, eyes narrowing slightly. "What difference does it make?"
Ren finally looked at her then, her expression unreadable.
Lily's lips pressed into a thin line. "You're impossible."
Ren shrugged, nonchalant as ever. "Maybe. But you do have issues."
Lily frowned, unsure whether to be offended or laugh. Ren pointed her fork across the hall toward Severus, who was sitting with the Slytherins, his gaze flickering toward them now and then.
"That boy is no good," Ren said, voice quiet but firm. "He's got poison in him, and you keep pretending it's sugar."
Lily's shoulders stiffened. She followed Ren's gaze, watching the boy who had once been her closest friend, still is supposedly. He was alone even among his own, hiding his pain behind sneers and potions fumes.
Her voice came out low, almost a whisper. "Neither am I."
Ren didn't respond, and she didn't need to. Around them, the Great Hall buzzed with laughter, gossip, and the clatter of cutlery but for those few moments, both girls were somewhere else entirely. Lily wrestled with her guilt, Ren with her indifference, and somewhere between them, the fragile thread of almost-friendship trembled but didn't quite break.
Lily glanced down at her plate again, pretending to eat. Across the table, Ren had already gone back to her turkey, chewing methodically, as if their entire conversation hadn't just brushed against something painfully real.
Lily envied her for that, for being able to care so little, or at least to act like it. Maybe Ren wasn't heartless, just tired of pretending the world was fair.
And maybe Lily wasn't as good as she wanted to believe.