Ylenna's POV
In the afternoon, Ylenna sat by the window, staring at the lake again. Now, the scenery she had in mind also pictured a dog.
She supposed that, if she could manage to bear a child in the next month, that dog would be only one year older than her baby. That should be enough for them to have time to bond, right? And… What would they call the puppy?
"I am being so foolish right now. How could I be daydreaming about a happy family afternoon with a man who is not even willing to sleep by my side? I cannot even imagine bringing up the puppy's naming, let alone all the rest…"
— You know, you are my wife now, though everything... So whatever is concerning you, you can just tell me and I will do whatever is in my powers to solve it. — The bass voice sounded from behind her. Again, she jolted up, startled. He seemed to find her reaction funny.
— Also, if you react like that every time I catch you staring through the window when I come back from my duties, I will start thinking you are planning an escape.
— Go-Good evening… Welcome back, husband.
"I will do whatever is in my powers to solve it." That was so ironic. If only he knew himself to be the source of her concerns…
— Do you feel well? I imagine you had quite the hangover. — Again, he cut off her trail of thought.
— I was… a bit sick when I woke up, but Zena brought me some tea that made me feel better.
— I see… That is good. Do you want to dine at the dining hall? I could ask the servants to bring the food up here, if you prefer. Since the festivities are already over, there's no obligation to be there.
— I am fine dining down there with everyone.
— Okay, then. We should go. — He started turning around when she announced:
— Husband… I have a question.
— Go ahead. — He turned back to face her.
— Last morning… why did you say I despise you? I felt… utterly outraged by that. — Now that she had gathered the courage to bring the topic up, she could make more sense of how she felt about it.
The prince looked slightly surprised, then sat on a chair, an honest look on his face.
— Do you feel offended by me bringing up the truth? I mean, we were by ourselves, so I was not exposing you to any-
— That… is not the problem. The problem is it is not true. Why did you think I despised you?
He arched an eyebrow, clearly shocked.
— You are saying you do not despise me, then?
She scoffed, utterly frustrated. Her hands went up and down while she stomped her foot once.
— Where did you get that idea from? It is so absurd! What have I ever done for you to think that of me?
Her voice was higher pitched than normally and sounded even more angry than she intended to. Not as graceful as she wanted to behave, but she could not back off now.
— You know, this… is the most honest I have ever seen of you.
— St-Stop… beating around the bush, I beg you. And please, do answer my question at once.
Rhovian sighed, seemingly finding fun in all that situation.
— Whenever we met… you always had a quite specific expression that you reserved only for me. You looked as if you would rather be feeding pigs on a swamp than being by my presence.
— Wha… What?! — Ylenna got caught off guard. — I do not understand what you are talking about.
— You would squeeze your eyes, tighten your lips, frown and even turn your face from me. Actually, you looked as if you were saying "Why am I obliged to greet him?"
— That… That was not my true thought. I was actually upset, yes, but because I was wondering why you would have to look at me like you did.
— Me? — He asked, confused. — How did I look at you?
— Well? You looked at me as if… you could not find anything less interesting in the world. You had a blank gaze, expressionless face and… looked totally uninterested in me. Actually, I really thought you hated me.
Rhovian stared at her for a long thirty-seconds, before muttering:
— I… am sorry if that was how I made you feel. I guess, I do make that expressionless face quite more often than I wanted to. It was not intentional. I beg you to forgive me for all the times you felt offended.
She was surprised, but that was not everything.
— And, also… — Ylenna intended to talk about the time she heard him and his father arguing about their engagement, but figured out it would be embarrassing to say she stood there, eavesdropping. Instead, the woman tried to change her sentence. — also… It seemed that you were against being engaged to me. When my father announced it at that banquet, you looked so angry I thought you would break the goblet in your hand.
Again, Rhovian sighed, gazing down and nodding.
— Well… That is true. I did not want to marry you.
Though she knew the truth and thought herself prepared to hear him saying those words, the reality was way harsher. It felt like her ground had disappeared from beneath her feet.
— You… say it with so much ease… — She scoffed, fighting the tears threatening to moist her eyes. — It shall be… nice feeling this indiffer-
— Because. — He continued. — I thought you despised me. And also… There was another reason, one not regarding you. I did not wish to marry. At all. Nor you, nor whoever would be presented as a potential fiancee for me. I did not plan to take on a wife.
Ylenna blinked, completely flustered.
— You… did not… — Suddenly, a thought occurred to her. — Are you… perhaps… — He arched an eyebrow, waiting. — not interested in… female, but rather, male bodies?
He stared at her in disbelief for a few seconds before bursting out in laughter.
— Dear Gods… Had I known you were so funny, I would have tried to engage in some conversations at the common banquets.
— Is it… not the case, then?
— No, Ylenna. That is not the case. I am not into other men. — He chuckled. — Though I may admit it would be easier for me, had I been. I am just… in a situation where I would find it better to live by myself.
— I… see…
— So rest easy, I do not hate you, nor have I ever felt like that toward you. And, again, I am sorry if my behavior made you react in such a way that I ended up finding the opposite to be true and believing you despised me. I realize now it all started with my own failure in perceiving and controlling my expressions.
With that, Rhovian got up and headed to the door, holding it open.
— Now, shall we go dine?
Taking a deep breath, Ylenna gulped down and followed Rhovian out.
"Well… so he is just really bad with facial expressions?" Ylenna thought while walking the corridors holding his arm. "And the reason why he was so angry was not because he was marrying me, but because he got engaged against his will… And he actually thought I hated him. Yes. I think it is starting to make sense now. So the last thing to be solved now is for me to find out about what a married couple actually does in bed… WAIT! What am I thinking right now?!"
Ylenna stopped on her tracks, abruptly. Rhovian was slightly startled, turning to check on her.
— Are you feeling sick? What happened?
— I… Nothing. I just… — "Think of an excuse quickly… This!" — I just suddenly remembered that we got a dog puppy as a wedding gift, from your right hand knight.
— Ah… — Rhovian nodded slowly, gazing away, seeming to have only now remembered that as well. — Yes, indeed. So what?
— I went to visit her today. She is adorable.
— Hum… is that so? — He answered casually, but his face showed that he was still wondering the real point of it.
— We should decide on a name for her soon.
Rhovian nodded, now more firmly, having finally made sense out of her words.
— I understand. Well, you can name her as you wish. — He went back to walking, pulling her with him.
— I dare not. — Ylenna said, shaking her head vehemently. — She is a gift from your friend. And also, the first thing we get to name as husband and wife. When we have our children, I shall also not name them by myself, so-
This time, it was Rhovian's turn to stop abruptly.
— Is… something wrong?
He stood there in silence, not turning to face her. From that position and with the poor lighting on that corridor, she could not see his face well.
— As I have said before. It is still quite early to think of children of our own. Actually, I would prefer if you would not bring that topic again before I do. — He swallowed his own saliva. — We can name the dog together when I come back from the training grounds, tomorrow. I will come earlier.
The coldness in his tone and the meaning of his words sent shivers to Ylenna's spine. Her chest felt tightened and her eyes, once again that night, threatened to let tears run down, but she did her best to avoid them.
— I… understand, husband.
And that was all they talked about for the rest of the night.