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Chapter 72: The Internet Is Bricked
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"Try… now," Adam ground out, his voice strained.
Charles, surprised and curious, replaced the helmet.
He felt the amplifier's potential magnify a hundredfold in his mind, a psychic telescope suddenly fitted with a galaxy-wide lens... An exaggeration, but that's the illusory feeling he got.
It was different. The psychic field expanded, piercing veils of magic and age-old shrouds.
In the dark, cold psychic space that represented the Carpathian Mountains, he found it: a vast, ancient, and ravenously hungry consciousness, sleeping yet eternally aware. Dracula.
He relayed the coordinates, his voice hushed. Adam nodded and asked for more, a few other names, whispered so the audience's eager ears could not catch them.
Charles complied, one after another, the enhanced Cerebro locating hidden minds with terrifying ease.
Finally, as Adam released his hold, breathing heavily, Charles looked at him, his expression grave.
"You have what you need. I must have your assurance, Adam. That you will not use this knowledge for evil ends."
Adam wiped sweat from his brow and offered a weak, odd smile. "Professor… My ends are my own. But I rarely consider them 'evil.' Just… necessary... And Mother Teresa could only hope to be as kind as I, so be assured." It was the closest to a promise he would give.
Yeah, that wasn't assuring at all.
[Charles just became the ultimate radar for a minute!]
[Who!? Who did Adam want to look for aside from Dracula!? Why tf did the show hide them?!]
[What does Adam want with Dracula?]
[He wants to become a vampire, maybe?]
[He's a glass canon, so it makes sense.]
[But that sounds like a risky venture considering all their weaknesses.]
Later, after a round of farewells that involved enthusiastic hugs for Jean, who clung a little too long, and a fiercely possessive one from Anna, Adam drove away from the mansion.
He popped pieces of rich, dark chocolate into his mouth, the sugar and caffeine a poor substitute for actual rest.
Alice's voice, serene and melodic, filled the car.
"Welcome back, Master. Several developments occurred in your absence. Elektra Natchios is awaiting you at the penthouse. She appears… agitated."
"Tell her to make herself at home. I'll be very late," Adam said, navigating the winding roads.
"Additionally, our passive surveillance network in Chinatown has logged a visual match for Shang-Chi. Confidence is 92%."
Adam raised a brow. Interesting, but not a priority. "Noted. Not the time. Alice, place a call to the contact listed as 'Aura.'"
The connection routed through several encrypted channels. After a few rings, it was picked up.
The voice that came through was a dry, raspy baritone, edged with a permanent, world-weary annoyance.
"Who the fuck is this?"
Adam smiled. He knew exactly who it was. A man defined by a singular, relentless pursuit. "Adam Cypher. I'm going to hunt Count Dracula. I know where he sleeps."
He paused, letting the absurdity sink in. "It's for completely selfish reasons, mind you. Interested in joining the hunt?"
There was no hesitation. Not a second of stunned silence. The voice came back instantly, sharp and clear, all weariness burned away by a sudden, blazing focus.
"I'm in."
[IT'S DEFINITELY BLADE! ADAM JUST CALLED BLADE THE VAMPIRE HUNTER!]
["I'm in." OF COURSE HE'S IN! IT'S DRAcula!]
[Adam is so brutally honest. I think Blade liked that.]
[I'm so fucking here for this!! I remember watching Blade long ago! Adam is right, he's fucking Aura!!!]
[Aura!!] [Watch the title of the next episode be, The Hunt!!]
[Peak!] [I'm on the edge of my seat!]
From the audience's point of view, the scene switched to a bleak, windswept parking lot on the outskirts of a nameless Romanian town.
Graffiti-strewn concrete, skeletal trees, and the industrial scent of diesel hung in the chilly air.
Parked in the shadow of a warehouse was a vehicle that looked utterly out of place: a sleek semi-truck, its trailer not a standard cargo box, but a smooth, matte-black elongated module studded with heat vents.
A car pulled up beside it; a low-slung, impossibly expensive Italian sports car in cherry red.
The door opened, and Tony Stark stepped out, squinting against the grey light.
He shivered slightly in his designer jacket, tugged a thick leather vest over it, and strode towards the truck's rear with the air of a man approaching a fascinating, possibly toxic, new toy.
[Tf is Tony doing here?!]
[Of course he came. Adam must've convinced him to join the vampire hunt, and Tony's curiosity is a terminal condition.]
[Adam is overpreparing again; his just in case condition is worsening.]
[There is no such thing as overpreparing, my man. In Marvel, either you overprepare, or be like all the tragic superheroes out there, onaholes for disasters and tragedies.]
[Speak your piece, brother! All facts!]
[Dude dude dude, Draula is about to be fucked, all holes, horse dildos included!]
[...] [???] [Are you considered a furry if you like horse cock porn?]
[Tf?] [If you like the horse cock, yes, and if the cock goes in a furry thing, yes, otherwise, I think no.]
[Hmm, I see your point, still furry though.]
[Nah man, think about it, what rocks about it is how that big fucking bat messes up the recipient, it's not that it's a horse cock, but that it's huge!]
[I can see it. In psychology, we studied that a part of the human brain pushes us to weird and exciting things, so that checks out.]
[What in Hydra am I reading? U guys are bricked in the head, seek therapy.]
[Well, you know, I'm a therapist, so if interested, visit at xxx, xxxx, xxxx!]
[Fuck, advertisement in this chat is getting out of hand, even on the main chat, they somehow still slip through the cracks.]
[Yeah, all companies are paying so much for people to advertise for them in the chat, better promotion than any in the world right now.]
[The world is going to shit, man, how did ads reach even here? Fuck ads!]
[+1] [+1] [+1] [+1] [+1] [+1] [Fuck Hydra!] [Hail Hydra!] [Fuck u!] [Traitor!]
He reached the back and knocked. A moment later, a hydraulic hiss sounded, and a ramp descended, revealing the interior.
Light, clean, and clinical, spilled out. Standing in the doorway was Adam Cypher. He looked like he'd been wrestling a gremlin in a server farm.
His clothes were a collection of stained sweatpants and a torn thermal shirt, smudged with oil and soot. Even his white hair was tousled.
He looked exhausted, exhilarated, and utterly at home.
"Stark. Finally here," Adam said, stepping aside. "Welcome to where the magic happens."
Tony stepped up the ramp, his snarky greeting dying on his lips as he took in the interior.
This shit wasn't just a truck but a full-scale, cutting-edge mobile workshop.
The walls were lined with tool racks, material printers, and component fabricators.
The center was dominated by a workbench where multiple mechanical arms; sleeker, more refined versions of the ones he'd seen before; were actively assembling something complex.
Holographic schematics floated in the air, updating in real-time. The air smelled of sweat, hot metal, and coffee.
"You turned a Peterbilt into a Tardis," Tony managed, his engineer's heart doing a little flip of pure covetousness. "I think I will make myself one of these."
Adam chuckled, gesturing for Tony to enter fully. The ramp sealed behind them, muting the outside world. "I know, right? It's cool, but remember to pay me some bonuses for the idea."
"Yeah, no." Tony scoffed, then wandered, his fingers brushing a rack of what looked like modified quinjet stabilizers. "So, what's the project? Building a better coffin?"
"Couldn't face a vampire unprepared, now could I?" Adam shrugged, moving back to the central workbench where a device resembling a cross between a particle accelerator and a floodlight was taking shape.
Tony peered at the schematics floating nearby. UV wavelength emitters, silver aerosol dispersal units, high-intensity sonic disruptors keyed to vampiric auditory sensitivity.
"You're taking the folklore seriously. Sunlight, silver, holy artifacts, stakes… you're mapping weaknesses. Have you even seen one of these things?"
"I know for a fact vampires and demons exist," Adam said, not looking up as he calibrated a focusing lens. "I've met a demon. Monitored a few… enthusiastic vampires this past week."
He nodded to a monitor on the wall. "Play file 'Fangdance-7.'"
The screen flickered to life. The footage was grainy, from a high-angle security camera overlooking a dimly lit alley in what was clearly a different Romanian town.
A figure moved with unnatural speed, blurring to pin a man against a wall. The feed had enhanced audio.
A wet, tearing sound, a choked gurgle, then the predator leaned back, its eyes glowing faintly red in the infrared spectrum.
Tony's face lost its sardonic humor. He watched, silent, as the vampire carried the limp body with him and vanished into the shadows. "Could you have saved him?" He asked, his voice tight.
"Not in time," Adam said, his tone devoid of emotion. "The surveillance network in that town is partially controlled by what I assume to be a local vampire council."
"I've noticed that they're trying pretty hard to remain nothing more than folklore, so Infiltration is delicate. Any overt action risks alerting the big boss... Dracula"
"The big boss…" Tony's eyes twitched. "Dracula? Is every myth just fucking true? What? Now you would say even God exists?"
"Yeah, actually. "Adam nodded, finally looking at him. "After seeing certain things, and based on truths my imaginary friends insist on, I'm operating under the assumption that every major mythos is real. Better safe than incinerated by a millennia-old lord of the undead."
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