The beast moved before Lily could think. Her body slammed into the dealer again, this time with purpose. Her hand caught the front of his skull and drove it against the concrete floor.
The crack echoed through the empty building.
His screaming cut off as his eyes rolled back, his body becoming slack beneath her.
Lily didn't hesitate. Couldn't hesitate. The hunger commanded and she obeyed.
Her fangs sank into his throat, piercing flesh and artery with delight. Blood erupted into her mouth, hot and rich and absolutely perfect.
The relief was instantaneous. The fire in her throat began to recede, replaced by something that felt like cool water flowing through a desert. Every cell in her body sang with gratitude as the blood rushed in, filling the emptiness that had been consuming her for weeks.
More. She needed more.
Lily drank deeply, lost in the sensation. The world narrowed to nothing but the pulse beneath her lips and the taste flooding her senses.
Then the memories came.
They slammed into her mind like scenes from a film she never wanted to watch.
The dealer standing outside a middle school, passing small baggies to teenagers who handed over crumpled bills. Their faces young, eager, desperate to be seen as cool.
A woman in her thirties, track marks on her arms, begging for just a little more on credit. His laugh as he walked away.
An alley behind a warehouse where the dealer stood over a man on his knees. The kneeling man crying, pleading, promising he'd get the money soon. The dealer raising a gun. The flash. The body dropping.
Boardrooms with expensive suits and cold eyes. Handshakes and briefcases exchanging hands. Men with scars and weapons standing guard while deals were made. Money changing hands. Kilos of white powder being divided and packaged.
No doubt remained. This man had earned what was happening to him.
Lily drank harder, greedier. She wanted every last drop. Wanted to drain him completely dry for all the lives he'd ruined, all the death he'd caused.
The heartbeat beneath her slowed. Strong and steady became weak and thready.
Thump-thump became thump...thump...thump.
Then silence.
Lily tore herself away and scrambled backward. She sat hard on the floor, staring at the corpse sprawled before her.
His face looked peaceful. Almost serene. As if death had been a mercy rather than justice.
The satisfaction in her belly turned to ash.
What had she done? What had she become?
The self-loathing rose up swift and vicious. Disgust crawled across her skin like insects. She'd killed another man. Murdered him in cold blood. Drained every ounce of blood from his body because she'd been hungry.
Monster.
The word pounded in her skull.
You're a monster.
Lily forced herself to breathe even though she didn't need to. The motion helped center her thoughts. Helped push past the horror long enough to think practically.
She scanned the room. Broken furniture, debris, and shattered windows. And of course one very dead body that would eventually be discovered. Nothing in her immediate surroundings could help cover up what she had done.
She should have planned this better. Should have thought about disposal before she'd fed but hindsight did nothing for her now.
Water. She needed deep water to weigh him down and sink him where no one would look. But Dallas wasn't exactly known for its lakes and even if it had been, she had no car to transport a corpse.
Dismemberment crossed her mind. Chop him into pieces, scatter the parts across the city in dumpsters and abandoned lots. Bury what she could. Make it impossible to find all of him or piece together what happened.
The thought made her stomach turn.
Fire then. That was the only practical option left.
Lily rifled through the dealer's pockets. Found his phone, his wallet with forty dollars cash, a bag of white powder, and a cheap plastic lighter.
She flicked the lighter and watched the small flame dance. It would work to ignite him but there was nothing here to make sure the fire burned hot enough or long enough. She needed an accelerant.
"Goddammit."
The word came out harsh and bitter. Resentment burned through her chest. That stranger. That bastard who'd turned her and then abandoned her to figure this all out alone. Sink or swim, he'd said. Learn to stand on your own two legs.
Well she was standing. Barely. And she was drowning in consequences he'd never bothered to prepare her for.
Lily stood and brushed off her jeans while making a decision.
She moved quickly through the building and back out onto the street. It didn't take her long to return to the convenience store and she was relieved to see it still open this late at night.
She straightened her jacket and wiped at her mouth. Her hand came away clean but when she looked down at her shirt she winced.
Crimson stains were splashed all down the front of her black shirt, still visible despite the dark color.
Lily yanked her jacket closed and zipped it to her throat. Shoved her hands in her pockets. Forced her posture to relax as she crossed the street with what she hoped looked like casual confidence.
She caught her pale face staring back at her as she approached the store front. She looked healthier, her face more full and youthful. A well fed vampire indeed.
The bell chimed when she entered. The elderly clerk behind the bulletproof glass didn't even glance up from his newspaper. Lily walked down the aisles until she found what she needed, a large bottle of lighter fluid.
She approached the counter and slid the bottle through the payment slot.
The clerk rang it up without looking at her face.
"Three seventy-nine."
Lily passed him a five from the dead dealer's wallet.
He made change and pushed it through along with the bottle.
"Thanks."
He grunted and returned to his paper, undisturbed by the fact that a nervous young woman just bought flame accelerant at an odd time of the night.
Lily walked out, forcing herself to remain calm despite the storm raging inside of her. She didn't want to run because it could draw attention. The walk back to the abandoned building felt longer for some reason.
The body waited right where she'd left it.
Lily unscrewed the cap and began pouring lighter fluid over the corpse. The chemical smell filled her nostrils a she emptied the entire bottle, making sure to saturate the dealer's clothes and hair.
She pulled out the lighter, flicked it once. The flame caught.
She tossed it and stepped a few feet back.
The body ignited with a whoosh a flames erupted across the man, orange and hungry. Eager to consume just as she had.
Lily didn't stay to watch. She turned and ran, praying the fire would burn him beyond recognition before anyone came to investigate.
Her apartment waited. Her only sanctuary in this nightmare she now called existence.
***
Lily slammed the apartment door behind her and twisted the deadbolt. Her hands shook as she slid down to the floor, back pressed against the wood. She cradled her head in her hands.
"Fuck!"
The word tore out of her throat, raw and vicious. Emotions crashed over her like waves. Hatred. Self-loathing. Disgust so thick she could taste it.
She hated herself. Hated what she'd become. Hated that stranger who'd turned her and then vanished like smoke, leaving her to navigate this nightmare alone.
What was she now? Not human anymore, a vampire. Something that killed to survive. The movies and the television shows never showed this side of things, at least not honestly.
Speaking of honesty, she wanted to lie to herself. Wanted to believe the dealer's death had been an accident. That she'd lost control. That the hunger had overwhelmed her rational mind and she couldn't have stopped if she'd tried. The Devil made me do it.
But that was bullshit.
The truth sat heavy on her shoulders, a grotesque gargoyle that mocked her humanity. She'd had enjoyed it. Not just the feeding, not just the relief when the fire in her throat finally went out. She'd felt satisfaction when his heart stopped beating beneath her mouth. Felt pleasure at the thought that one less drug dealer prowled the streets.
One less monster.
Except she was the monster now. How could she judge another when her very existence was the definition of "evil"?
That scared her more than anything.
More than the hunger or the supernatural strength or the fact that she'd burned a man's corpse to hide her crime. The woman who would never have dreamed of hurting anyone, hell the girl who'd cried when her grandmother's cat died, had killed someone and felt good about it.
Maybe she should just walk outside. Wait for the sun to rise. See it one more time before it destroyed her.
But even as the thought formed, she knew she wouldn't. Couldn't. She was too terrified to die.
Coward.
Lily forced herself to stand. Her legs felt weak but in the stories vampires didn't get weak. Vampires broke bones and moved faster than humans could blink and killed without remorse. If only this was just another story, written by a broken mind who desperately needed help.
She moved to the bathroom, peeling off her blood-soaked clothes as she entered. She left them in a heap on the bathroom floor because she had no idea what to do with them now.
The shower knob turned easily in her hand as she stepped under the spray.
Water cascaded over her skin but she couldn't tell if it was hot or cold. Just wet. Just there. The temperature meant nothing to her body anymore, same as the autumn wind outside or the warmth from the heater inside of the apartment.
She was beginning to think that this was punishment for something she'd done in a past life. Some karmic debt she didn't remember owing. Maybe she had offended a witch and had been hexed, doomed to suffer in this life for something she couldn't recall doing.
Blood and soap swirled down the drain in pink ribbons. She watched it spiral away and wondered what tomorrow night would bring.
Would the fire make the news? How could it not? Abandoned building burns with an unidentified body inside. The police would investigate and they'd search for answers.
Would they figure out what really happened? Would they find evidence she'd missed? A witness who'd seen her enter or leave?
And if they did, what then?
Lily pressed her forehead against the tile. The stranger's words echoed in her memory.
When they discover you, and they will, do not resist.
Who were "they"? Other vampires? Some secret organization? Humans themselves?
She had no answers. Just blood on her hands and an eternity of nights stretching ahead of her.