William's eyes widened, and he struggled free of his grip, but Nikolas shoved him against the wall and tried to force a kiss.
William pressed his lips together and turned his head. "Let me go."
"You used to like it."
"I don't want to kiss you."
He slapped him across the cheek. Nikolas released his wrists and took a step back. His cheek was red, a surprised expression flashing in his eyes.
"What's gotten into you?"
Anger boiled in William's veins. "What the hell is wrong with you? Are you forcing people to kiss you now?"
"No, I…" Nikolas looked away and seemed genuinely uncomfortable. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I was stupid."
"I already told you: there's nothing between us anymore. Stop torturing yourself."
He tried to walk away, but Nikolas grabbed his wrist again.
"Wait!"
"Let me go!"
"Please, give me a second chance."
"No! Let me go!"
Nikolas dropped to his knees before him and took both his hands; there was desperation in his gaze. "Please, William, I need it. Please… I need you to look at me. Don't take even that away from me."
"Get up."
But he bent down at his feet and clutched the hem of his vest. "I beg you, don't treat me coldly. Your indifference is tearing me apart."
Discomfort tightened in William's chest, and he cast a glance around. Some servants were watching, whispering. Nikolas's outburst had not gone unnoticed. Rumors would spread, and they would start saying he had stolen the advisor's heart.
Or they would say far worse things, as had happened at the Academy.
Would the prince think he had betrayed him? That he was just a whore using his body to make powerful men yield?
William pressed his lips together. "Leave me alone," he hissed, hoping his voice wouldn't tremble. "I am not yours. You have no right to touch me like that."
He couldn't kiss him as if nothing had happened.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." Nikolas reached a hand toward him, but William recoiled.
"Don't ever touch me again! Don't even speak to me—I want nothing to do with you. Get out of my life!"
For a moment, Nikolas looked at him, lost, then he clenched his fists.
"Nothing to do with me? We were fucking, William! Every damn night for almost a year, and it never seemed like you despised it!"
"That was three years ago. Things have changed!"
"So what's changed? Is there someone else now?" Nikolas grabbed his arm. "Is that why you don't even dare to look me in the eyes?"
"What I do is none of your business, Nikolas."
"It is! We were together for a year, we were happy, then you stopped looking at me altogether."
"I had my reasons!"
"What reasons? Going to bed with someone else? Wasn't I enough for you anymore?" Nikolas shoved him against the wall and pinned one wrist above his head. "To you, people are things to use and throw away, aren't they?"
"Let me go…"
"Is Alex just an object, too? You'll use him as well, won't you?"
William clenched his fist and struck him across the cheekbone. Nikolas let go and staggered back, one hand clutching his cheek.
"You avoided me for three years. You're avoiding me here at the palace, too. I'm tired of being treated like an object, William. I deserve to know why you left me."
"Knowing won't bring me back to you!"
"But at least I can try to forget you and move on. Or won't you even allow me that? Don't I matter enough to you?"
"Leave me alone. I have nothing to say to you. After three years, you have no right to ask me anything."
Nikolas shot him an icy glance and walked away.
William pressed both hands to his lips, nausea gripping his stomach. He leaned against the wall, trying to calm down. The kiss, the way Nikolas had reacted… all of it had rekindled the disgust he felt for himself.
But somehow, he had managed to push him away.
"Damn it."
---------------------------------
Alex retrieved a few volumes on aphrodisiacs and drugs and returned to his study. He had found more than expected, and, with William's help, he would manage to get to the bottom of the problem.
Perhaps the mage was right in saying it was an effect of the Crown Pact, but it was better to be certain before the situation could spiral out of control.
He opened the door and stepped inside. William sat at his desk, a letter opener clenched between his fingers, his head bowed.
A wave of fear filled the prince's chest.
"Will!" Alex let the books fall and reached for him. "William, look at me."
William lifted his gaze and seemed surprised, as if he had not even heard him come in. "Your Highness?"
The prince hesitated. He was not hurting himself and seemed fine—had he worried too much? "Is… everything all right?"
William lowered his eyes to the letter opener and nodded. "I was just lost in thought." He set the object down on the papers and rubbed his forehead. "Where were you?"
"Well, in the library. Didn't you read the note I left you?"
"I'm afraid not. I'm sorry, I had something else on my mind."
"Did you run into Ballard?"
"No, don't worry." William gave a strained smile. "Thank you for requesting that I be transferred. My new room is much larger than my previous one."
"So you'll have much more space for all your books."
Alex caressed his cheek, but for some reason, William seemed tense and nervous. He didn't look well at all.
"Will, are you—"
"What do you need all those books for?"
"Ah, well." The prince scratched the back of his neck and glanced at the volumes he'd dropped on the floor. "I had a suspicion and needed to be sure."
"What are you talking about?"
"Our recent arousal. It isn't normal, and I have the impression it's getting worse. You think it's caused by the Pact, but I thought that someone might be drugging me."
William went pale. "By the spirits…"
"And I think you suffer the effects because of the Crown Pact. After all, it should apply to poisons and drugs too, shouldn't it?"
The mage brought a hand to his mouth and closed his eyes. "So you didn't really want to be with me, did you?"
"Everything I did or said was true, Will. Only… maybe I wouldn't have slept with you so often." He brushed William's cheek. "Are you all right?"
"I don't know." He opened his eyes again, his expression sharp once more. "I suppose it occurred to you recently since you didn't tell me until now."
"This morning. I would have told you as soon as you got back."
"Good. Let's get to work."
Alex picked up the books, set them on the mage's desk, and pulled the chair closer. They began searching through the volumes.
"Your Highness, what symptoms do you have?"
"Constant arousal, which remains even after I've come. Ah, um, and this morning I had an erection just from standing near you."
William raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Yes. Even now I'm making a great effort to hold back, and I don't know how much longer I'll last."
"Anything else?"
"I'd say no. I don't feel more vulnerable than usual."
"Have you eaten or drunk anything strange recently?"
"I don't think so. If they put it in my food, I fear it's odorless and tasteless."
"Or it could have such a faint taste that it's covered by the flavor of the dishes."
Alex rested his elbows on the desk. "Does anything come to mind?"
"Not yet, but I would rule out the drug from last time. It has a persistent smell that's difficult to mask."
William opened the largest book halfway through and flipped several pages as if searching for something. "The effects are mild, though."
"That's good, even if I don't understand the point. If I wanted to drug someone using aphrodisiacs, I'd look for something powerful."
"Such compounds are difficult to obtain." William frowned. "But you're not entirely wrong—I would use something stronger too. I don't understand what they hope to achieve."
Alex nibbled his lip. "What if it's simply an effect of the Pact? Maybe we're mistaken, and it isn't the work of a drug."
"I don't think it's our bond's fault. If it's tied to the Crown Pact and our feelings, it should have appeared earlier as well, shouldn't it?"
"You're not wrong."
"Your intuition is sound. It's worth verifying."
Alex nodded and caressed William's cheek. He stiffened and, for a moment, looked at him as if he were frightened.
The prince withdrew his hand. "Is everything all right? You seem shaken."
"Yes, I just… had a rather unpleasant argument."
"Not with Ballard, I hope?"
"No, with…" He hesitated, and his gaze grew distant. "With Nikolas."