Next day, they went to see a healer. The healer's chambers were deep in the lion territory. The elderly healer who'd tended Nyx after the trials looked up as Raziel led her in.
"You want me to poison her." She immediately said.
"Micro-doses to build tolerance. Sylthis is known for using chemical warfare as much as psychological."
"Sylthis uses poisons that affect the mind, not the body." The healer walked towards a cabinet filled with different vials. "Confusion toxins, hallucinogens, time distortion compounds; that make you doubt your own senses."
"Can we build resistance?" Raziel asked.
"Not much. These aren't physical poisons you can adapt to. They're magical in nature." The healer selected three vials. "But we can teach her what each feels like, so she recognizes when she's been dosed."
"How?" Nyx asked.
"By dosing you carefully." The healer poured a few drops of the purple vial into a cup of water. "This is Flexum. It makes colors too bright, sounds too loud, and time feel long. Drink."
Nyx looked at Raziel.
"You're sure about this?"
"No but we don't have better options. I'm here, if anything goes wrong…"
"If anything goes wrong, there's not much you can do except wait for it to wear off." The healer held out the cup. "Teaching your mind to recognize that altered states are temporary helps you fight them."
Nyx took the cup and drank immediately. For a minute, nothing happened. Then colors exploded.
The gray stone walls turned vibrant purple, then green. Her own heartbeat sounded like a drum to her, Raziel's breathing sounded like thunder.
Time stretched and compressed. A second became an hour, and hour passed in a blink.
"Easy." She heard Raziel's voice from very far away and very close simultaneously. "You're safe. This is the poison. It's not real."
But it felt real. Nyx reached for him but her hand took forever to reach his face. When she finally touched him , his skin was too hot, and too cold.
"Make it stop." She said in a distorted voice.
"It will stop soon. Just hold on."
Nyx closed her eyes, but that made it worse. She saw her mother's face, rotting. Her father's laugh, echoing from everywhere, the animals she'd killed, staring at her.
"Open your eyes." Raziel said. "Look at me. Focus on something real."
She opened her eyes and saw Raziel's face going in and out of focus. Slowly, the poison wore off. When it was over, Nyx was shaking and covered in sweat.
"That was horrible." She gasped.
"That was the mild version." The healer said. "Sylthis will use much stronger, and mix all of them together so you can't tell which poison is causing which effect."
"Do we have to do this again?" She asked.
"Twice more with different poisons. You need to learn to recognize the patterns." The healer was already preparing the next dose. "This one is Tempus Fugit. It makes past and present blur together. You'll experience memories as if they're happening now. Drink."
The second poison was worse than the first. Nyx relived her mother's death, her father's abandonment, her first kill; all while sitting there.
"You're here in the lion territory. You're not there anymore. You're here." Razeil kept reminding her.
When that poison wore off, Nyx was sobbing without realizing it.
"I can't do this again." She whispered.
"You can." Raziel said. "One more. Then we're done for today."
The third poison was the worst. It was Veritas Serum, the truth poison.
"It makes you unable to lie." The healer explained. "It seems harmless, but Sylthis uses it to break down defenses. Every thought, feeling, secret you have, you'll say out loud, after drinking this."
"No." Nyx pushed the cup away. "I can't…"
"You have to."
"You don't understand…I'll say things I can't take back. I'll tell you things I shouldn't tell you…"
"You can tell me." Razeil cupped her face. "Whatever it is, I can handle it."
"Can you handle knowing everything about me? Everything I've done?"
"Yes."
Seeing the determination in his eyes, Nyx took the cup and drank. This poison hit faster than the others. Within seconds, she started talking.
"I'm so scared all the time. I'm scared of dying, of going mad, of becoming something I hate. I'm scared of trusting you because everyone I've ever trusted has left or died or betrayed me. I'm scared of caring about you because caring makes me weak and weakness gets you killed. I'm scared…"
"Nyx." Raziel interrupted. "It's okay. You don't have to…"
"I'm scared I'm falling in love with you." She was unable to stop. "I'm scared because I don't know what love is supposed to feel like. What if you're just obsessed with the idea of me? What if…"
"Stop. Can you hear me?" Razeil asked.
"Yes."
"Everything you just said, I feel too. Come back from Sylthis's trial sane and we'll talk about it."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
The poison wore off slowly, leaving Nyx exhausted.
"She needs rest." The healer said.
Raziel carried Nyx back to his den, put her on the furs and sat beside her.
"You didn't have to admit all that." He said.
"The poison made me."
"I know but you could have fought it harder."
"Maybe I needed to say it." Nyx admitted.
They sat in silence for a while. Then Nyx closed her eyes.
"One more day of training tomorrow. Then the trial. Then…" She didn't finish.
"Then you come back." Raziel said. "That's the only option I'm giving you."
"And if Idon't?"
"Then I will walk into the serpent territory and carry what's left of you out myself, regardless of consequences. I will start a war if I have to. I will burn Sylthis's domain to ashes, and I will hunt down every piece of your shattered mind and put you back together, even if it takes the rest of my life."
Nyx opened her eyes to look at him. He looked very determined and serious.
"You're insane."
"You make me insane." He squeezed her hand. "So, don't give me a reason to start a war."
"I'll try."
"Don't try. Succeed."
Nyx stared at him, and saw the fear beneath his strength.
"I promise. I'll come back sane."
"Good." He pulled her close. "Because I'm not ready to lose you yet. We still have too many things to tell each other."
Dawn came too fast. Nyx woke up to find Raziel already gone from the den. She saw a tray of food nearby with a handwritten note:
Eat. You need strength. Training will start soon with Kira. I'll be there.
—Razeil
Nyx was hungry, she immediately started eating. Her body was healing from the trials, but the poison sessions had left her mentally exhausted, and the stress of leaving for the serpent territory tonight was making her even more terrified.
She was halfway through the meal when Kira entered without knocking.
"Ready for the worst day yet?" She asked.
"Is it worse than being poisoned?"
"Depends on how much you care about knowing what's real." Kira gestured for Nyx to follow. "Today, we teach you that nothing is what it seems. Come."
They entered the strategy room that had a circular chamber with a single round table and seven chairs. Raziel was already there with three other lions Nyx didn't recognize.
"These are some of my most trusted advisors." Raziel explained. "They've agreed to help with today's exercise. You'll need to tell which of them is lying and which is telling the truth."
"We're each going to tell you a story. Five will be true, and five will be false. You must tell which is which." Kira said as she sat on the chair.
"It's impossible without verification…"
"Exactly." Kira smiled. "Welcome to Sylthis's world where truth and lies blend seamlessly and verification is impossible. You have to trust your instincts, logics, and hope you're right. Because being wrong has consequences."
"What kind of consequences?" She asked.
"Let's just say you'll want to be better at this than you are now. Shall we begin?"