"What do we do?" Hermione's eyes were still red, and she looked totally lost.
"They rushed into the girls' bathroom to save me?" she muttered to herself.
"Uh… yeah, obviously, Miss Granger," Alice chimed in, popping Hermione's little emotional bubble.
Hermione whipped out her wand so fast it made a whoosh. "Alice, we have to help them."
Alice threw her hands up with a shrug. "No clue why this is suddenly about me, but I'm not saying no to a rescue mission."
She started walking down the hall, glancing back. "Come on, Miss Granger—let's go save your two reckless dudes."
Hermione's face went nuclear. "They're not my dudes! What are you even talking about?!"
"HARRY!!!!!" Ron's blood-curdling scream echoed from the bathroom.
Alice and Hermione's faces went white. They sprinted.
The second they shoved the door open, Alice let out a low whistle: "Merlin's beard, brave Harry Potter, everybody."
Harry was riding the troll like a rodeo cowboy, his wand jammed up its nose. Both of them looked ready to murder each other.
Ron, standing there clueless and panicked, spotted Hermione and yelled, "Weren't you in the bathroom?!"
"Clearly, Mr. Weasley," Alice deadpanned. "You and Harry are brave, but reckless!"
Hermione shot Ron a death glare but cut off the bickering. "Focus! How do we get Harry off that thing?"
Alice's brain kicked into gear. "Hermione—stand by the door, ready to catch Potter.
Weasley—now, go find any professor. Run!"
Ron dodged a troll foot and bolted, then skidded back. "Snape counts, right?"
Alice stared. "Are you kidding? He's the Head of House! Go!"
Ron shrank and took off.
"And you?" Hermione asked.
"Don't worry about me—I've got a plan."
She flicked her wand—sparks burst from the tip like a flare. The troll's tiny brain locked onto the light instantly.
"Potter—you still with me?"
Harry, half-dazed, nodded. "Yeah, Alice."
"Good. On 'one-two-three,' I'm tossing you a roll of toilet paper. Wrap it around the troll's eyes and ears. Got it?"
Harry had no idea what she was cooking, but he nodded.
The All-Souls Banner on her wrist burned hotter. Trolls weren't human—she'd need full power to stun it.
BOOM—an invisible soul-shock slammed into the troll. It froze.
Alice chucked the roll. Harry caught it, using the split-second to blindfold the troll's face.
"Now—jump to Hermione!"
Harry yanked his wand free and dove. Hermione caught him just as the troll snapped out of it, roaring and flailing blindly.
Alice whipped the sparks onto the paper—WHOOSH. The toilet paper ignited.
The troll screamed, dropping its club to claw at its burning face. Its meaty hands couldn't even touch the flames without searing itself.
Alice darted between its stomping feet like a mouse under an elephant. Harry and Hermione held their breath.
She made it. The three of them slammed the door shut and locked it.
THUD. The door rattled but held.
Ron finally showed up with McGonagall, Snape hot on their heels.
McGonagall looked frantic. "Where's the troll? Weasley said you were trapped!"
Alice pointed. "In there. We got out."
CRASH. The door exploded off its hinges. The troll charged out, face charred, eyes wild—until it saw two extra adults.
McGonagall didn't hesitate: "Stupefy!"
A blazing red bolt hit the troll square in the chest. It gave McGonagall a grumpy look, then toppled like a felled tree.
"Four of you—explain why you're fighting a troll."
Alice studied the ugly heap while the trio stared at their shoes.
"No one?" McGonagall snapped.
Hermione stepped forward—Alice grabbed her wrist and stepped up instead.
"I'll explain, Professor. After Charms, I asked Professor Flitwick about the Disarming Charm. On my way out, I ran into Miss Granger in the bathroom. We left together—and bam, troll in the hallway. We bolted back into the Charms classroom."
"Then Potter and Weasley, worried about Hermione, came looking. Saw the troll, thought she was still inside, and charged in like heroes. The school should commend their bravery."
Snape snorted.
Alice shot him a look. "Then Hermione and I went to save Harry. Sent Ron for help."
McGonagall eyed the guilty trio and the smooth-talking Alice. "And why was Granger in the bathroom during dinner?"
Alice didn't blink: "Tummy troubles. Hasn't seen Madam Pomfrey yet."
McGonagall sighed. "Fine, Norton. If that's the truth… you all faced danger and worked together. Brave and clever. Five points each. Weasley—ten more for fetching a professor."
Ron raised a timid hand. "Actually… Alice told me to go."
"Another ten to Norton!"
Alice glanced at the unconscious troll. "Professor, quick question: Hogwarts is supposed to be the safest place in magical Britain. So… how'd a troll get in?"
Snape: "Heh."
Alice turned to him with a sigh. "Head of House, my family's sending Muggle shampoo for Christmas. You're welcome."
Snape's nostrils flared—he opened his mouth, but Dumbledore popped in like a cheerful grandpa.
"Oh, Miss Norton, excellent question!" he beamed, twinkling eyes dancing.
No one was sure if he meant the troll… or the shampoo.
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