Hu Tao's honeyed tongue was already in full motion.
With just one sentence, she froze Lumine and Paimon harder than Qiqi left out in a blizzard.
"Uh… can I help you with something?"
Lumine smiled stiffly, clearly uneasy.
Hu Tao stepped forward with the gentlest, most suspiciously angelic smile in Teyvat.
"Don't be scared~ I'm not a bad person! I just want to talk about something very important—life and death."
She balled her fists at her chest like she was offering a warm hug rather than a coffin brochure.
"I've done my research on you! Member of the Adventurers' Guild, rescued Mondstadt from the Dvalin crisis, Honorary Knight, and just yesterday—boom!—the Raiden Shogun herself put a bounty on your head!"
She extended her hands dramatically, pointing at Lumine as if revealing a treasure:
"A client of your quality is a premium target for Wangsheng Funeral Parlor! Among our four ranks—Hu, Tao, Zhu, and Mu—you're a certified Tao-tier VIP! So~ are you interested in hearing about our services? Our discounts are to die for!"
Lumine's face twitched.
"…I'm not interested."
She still had a missing brother to find. Who on earth would pre-order their own funeral?!
But Hu Tao was already revving up.
"Aha, a customer with natural resistance! That's fine. Actually—"
Her voice grew more passionate with every word.
Paimon and Lumine visibly flinched.
They were one sentence away from sprinting.
Bai Hao stepped in before Paimon actually detonated from stress.
He grabbed Hu Tao by the elbow and dragged her aside for a "private conversation."
Crossing his arms, he sighed deeply.
"Hall Master Hu… don't you think your sales technique might have… some issues?"
Hu Tao blinked innocently, plum-blossom eyes sparkling.
"Issues? None at all! If I make her feel the warmth of home, she'll definitely choose Wangsheng Parlor! Oh, right—do you want to sign up?"
Bai Hao held up one finger.
"Let's start with the basics. You know why the Millelith kicked you out, right? Because your sales strategy is from five eras ago."
Hu Tao paused.
Then her eyes lit up like Mora lamps.
"Oh? Then tell me! If your idea works, the Mora's yours. Lots of it!"
Bai Hao shook his head.
"Forget Mora for now. Let's… talk another day."
"Another day?" she tilted her head.
He coughed.
"What I mean is—I need to take them to the Rite of Descension first. So give me two days, then I'll come to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor myself and we'll discuss it in detail."
Hu Tao tapped her chin thoughtfully, then nodded.
"All right! Then I won't bother you today."
She reached into her sleeve and pulled out a small golden wooden plaque.
"This is a Hu-rank membership token for Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. With it, you get top-tier discounts. Keep it safe~!"
"No problem."
Bai Hao accepted it smoothly.
It still carried Hu Tao's faint warmth and fragrance.
Of course he treasured it immediately.
Anything from his "wife Hu Tao" deserved a place of honor.
Meanwhile, Lumine and Paimon practically sagged with relief as they finally entered Yujing Terrace.
"Bai Hao, how did you get her to stop pestering us?"
Paimon hovered beside him, sneaking glances back at Hu Tao.
Even from afar, the girl waved at them cheerfully:
"Have fun! Don't forget to visit Wangsheng Parlor~!"
Bai Hao shrugged casually.
"Oh, nothing much. Just sold her a dream. Who knows, maybe it'll make me rich later."
For all her tricks, Hu Tao was weirdly pure-hearted about business.
Which made her… very easy to "cooperate" with.
Of course, Bai Hao wasn't planning anything immoral.
He believed in win-win business.
After all—
Before you can milk a goat… you must make sure it's pregnant first.
"A fortune?!"
Lumine's ahoge perked straight up.
Paimon's eyes turned into glimmering Mora symbols.
"How are you gonna make money off this?"
"Yeah, yeah! Tell us!"
Both leaned in like gossip-hungry kittens.
Bai Hao coughed lightly.
"Trade secret. If I tell you, it won't work."
"Ehhh…"
Paimon puffed her cheeks. "Why is everyone in Liyue so scheming?"
"Heh. This is the City of Contracts. No business without cunning."
They walked deeper into Yujing Terrace.
The place was massive—winding bridges, ornate pavilions, glowing lanterns everywhere.
By the time they pushed through the crowd and reached the main ceremonial plaza, tens of thousands were already gathered, buzzing in anticipation.
On the central platform sat foreign envoys.
Standing poised before them was Ningguang, elegance incarnate.
Behind her: offerings, incense burners, Millelith soldiers in disciplined formation.
Paimon gasped.
"Wow! This is so fancy! So pretty!"
The Rite's scale was far beyond anything they'd imagined.
"This whole ceremony probably cost over a hundred billion Mora…" Lumine murmured.
"Of course," Bai Hao said lazily. "The Geo Archon is the God of Mora."
"And Liyue is the beating heart of Teyvat's commerce. If there's one thing we know how to do—"
He spread his hands grandly.
"—it's flex."
Each year's Rite had to outshine the last, both to honor Rex Lapis and to showcase Liyue's prosperity to the world.
The richer the show,
the brighter the future.
Ningguang stepped forward, raising her voice over the crowd:
"The auspicious hour has come. The Rite of Descension shall begin!"
She lifted her hands.
Crystals of pure stone spiraled around her, resonating with the glowing Eight Trigram Array beneath her.
A pillar of golden light shot into the heavens.
The sky darkened—
winds howled—
clouds churned—
BOOOOOOM!!
A thunderous roar split the heavens.
A half-dragon, half-Qilin divine beast plunged down from the clouds—
Shockwaves blasted across the entire plaza.
The Rite of Descension had begun.
And the chaos was only getting started…
◇ I'll be dropping one bonus chapters for every 10 reviews. comment
◇ One bonus chapter will be released for every 100 Power Stones.
◇ You can read 50 chapter ahead on P@treon if you're interested: patreon.com/Mona_studios