Chapter Nine: Enjoying time.with the kids
Angel woke up the next morning feeling refreshed, and she stretched and lay still for a moment, a soft smile hovering around her lips. She let herself luxuriate in the pleasure that still lingered in her body, at least until reality rushed back in.
She covered her face with both hands.
"I cannot believe I let myself go yesterday," she murmured to herself.
The truth sat heavily in her chest. Zahid was the twins' father. That fact did not change. And the harder truth was one she hated to admit. She still loved him. Deeply. Painfully. But love was not trust. And she could not trust him yet. Not with her heart. Not with her children.
People leave. Zahid had once left her too.
And she could not lie to herself that she feared he might do it again.
No matter how good last night felt, she needed time. She needed clarity. She needed to test him, to see if he truly loved her or if she was simply an old flame he felt he could walk in and out of whenever he pleased.
For a long moment she did not move. She lay on her back, staring at the ceiling, letting the silence soak into her bones. The curtains fluttered with the morning breeze, letting in thin slants of soft light that stretched across her sheets.
It was Saturday. The twins had no school. No rushing them out the door, no uniforms, no last minute homework. Today she only needed to be a mother. Nothing more. But even with the slow morning, her body still felt weak and warm, almost lethargic.
Every time she blinked, pieces of what happened yesterday returned in flashes.
Zahid's mouth on hers.
His hands exploring her skin, waking her all over again.
His voice calling her beautiful.
His weight above her.
The way her body responded without any hesitation, like she had never stopped belonging to him.
Angel pressed her palms against her face and exhaled shakily.
She could not let her mind stay there. Not now. Not until she sorted herself out.
She pushed herself up and pulled the blanket around her shoulders. For a moment she stared at the empty space beside her on the bed. Zahid had left quietly. No trace except the memory of his warmth on her skin.
It was better this way. She was not ready to speak to him yet. And he probably knew it.
She sighed and swung her legs out of the bed.
The house was not fully quiet. She could hear faint voices, little feet, soft laughter, the kind that only came from her kids when they were in a good mood. Angel rubbed her eyes and tried to gather herself before opening her door.
But the kids beat her to it.
The door flew open harder than she expected, and two small bodies spilled into her room like a burst of sunlight. The youngest, Mara, darted straight onto the bed and toppled over on the mattress.
"Mummy, wake up!" she squealed even though Angel was clearly awake. "We were waiting for you."
Malik ran in after her, his hair sticking up in ten different directions.
Mara pointed at Angel with a tiny accusing finger. "You slept too long."
Angel blinked at them, then laughed softly. "It is Saturday. I am allowed to sleep."
"No," Malik said seriously. "You said we will make pancakes today. So you cannot sleep forever."
Angel rubbed her forehead. "I never said forever."
"Well it felt like forever," Mara grumbled as she climbed onto Angel and flopped dramatically.
Their energy filled the room like bright paint on blank walls. The heaviness in Angel's chest eased a little. Their presence always grounded her.
Malik crawled closer and pressed his tiny hand against her cheek. "You look sad."
Angel blinked, surprised. "Do I?"
Malik nodded with full confidence. "Your eyebrows look tired."
Angel touched her own face and forced a small smile. "I am fine. Just sleepy."
Malik squinted at her. "Are you sure, mummy?"
Angel froze for a heartbeat, Zahid's name echoing in her mind, but she recovered quickly.
"I am just sleepy," she repeated.
The kids accepted her answer only because they were easily distracted.
Mara held up her shirt which was on backwards.
She also wanted help brushing her doll's hair.
Malik kept insisting he needed a new toothbrush because his was too blue.
Angel got off the bed and moved around the room, fixing hair, adjusting clothes, listening to small complaints and tiny joys. They kept her busy enough that the memories of last night slipped quietly into the background.
Just enough to breathe.
Just enough to feel like herself again.
After a while she brought them to the kitchen. Morning light fell across the counters, making everything look softer. Angel tied a scarf around her head and began pulling out ingredients while the kids argued about who would crack the eggs.
Malik tried first and ended up crushing the entire egg in his hand, shell and all.
"Oops," he whispered.
Angel sighed and smiled. "It is okay. Try gently next time."
Mara danced around the kitchen, humming, as she fixed her doll in a chair and told her to behave. Angel cracked the remaining eggs herself before anyone injured another one.
Soon the smell of warm batter and butter filled the room. The kids laughed and made faces at each other. Angel flipped pancakes while keeping them far from the hot pan. Everything felt messy, chaotic, alive.
And strangely peaceful.
She was pouring syrup when a soft knock sounded at the front door.
Two little heads snapped up instantly.
"Who is that?" Mara whispered like it was a mystery.
"I will check," Angel said, wiping her hands.
But her heart already knew.
It began beating a little faster.
Yesterday washed over her in a quiet wave.
She took a breath and walked to the door.
She opened it slowly.
He was there.
Zahid stood on the porch with two grocery bags in his hands. His shirt sleeves were rolled, his hair slightly messy, his expression calm but tired. It looked like he had not slept much.
Their eyes met, and for a long, still moment it felt like the air between them tightened.
Then he lifted one corner of his mouth.
"Good morning," he said softly.
Angel swallowed. "Morning."
Before she could say anything else, the kids shouted behind her.
"Handsome uncle is here!"
Angel did not even know when they started calling him that. Maybe it was better this way. She still did not know how to explain her history with him.
"Did you bring snacks for us, handsome uncle?" Mara asked loudly.
Zahid laughed quietly, warm and soft.
He shifted a little so the kids could see him. "I did bring snacks. But first I wanted to drop these."
He lifted the grocery bags.
Angel blinked. "You did not have to."
"I know," he said gently.
He waited until the kids ran back to the kitchen before he continued, his voice low and meant only for her.
"Angel, listen. I am not here to make you talk before you are ready. I do not want you to feel pressured or cornered." His eyes were steady, warm in a way that made her throat tighten. "Take your time. When you want to hear me out, you will. I am not forcing anything."
Angel felt her chest squeeze tightly.
He shifted the bags to one hand. "I know things are difficult for you right now. And I want you to understand something. I am not looking down on you. I am not trying to control anything. I just want to help however I can."
Angel opened her mouth but no words came out.
Zahid gave a small nod, as if he understood her silence perfectly.
"Do not overthink it. No matter how complicated things get between us, we are still childhood friends. That has not changed."
Heat rose behind Angel's eyes. She blinked quickly to hold it back.
She managed a quiet, breathless, "Thank you."
He gave a faint, patient smile. The kind that made her stomach twist softly.
The moment hung between them, gentle and unbroken.
Then from the kitchen the kids yelled:
"Mummy, the pancake is burning!" Mara yelled
" I've turned the gas off, mum!! " Malik voice quickly follows
Angel startled. Zahid chuckled.
"You should hurry up," he murmured.
She nodded and rushed into the kitchen.