Chapter 38 – Know Your Partner
March 27, 2018 – 7:56 AM
LAPD Academy – Advanced Training Room
The room was quieter than usual.
The recruits were sitting in a semicircle, not in the simulation yard or on the firing range, but in one of the behavioral and ethics instruction rooms, where they usually watched videos of real incidents for analysis. It was a neutral space, with simple chairs, cool white light, and walls adorned with the department's values: Integrity. Service. Courage. Commitment.
This time, there was no whiteboard full of tactical terms. There was no schedule on the projector. There was only Derek Davis, standing before them in his patrol uniform, sleeves rolled up to his forearms, and the firm expression that everyone had learned to respect.
John Nolan, Lucy Chen, Jackson West, and the other recruits were attentive. But curious. Derek's informal posture, and the absence of any equipment in the room, made the tension vibrate differently.
Derek looked at each of them before speaking. His voice was calm, but with the same weight as always.
— "Today... there's no simulation. No controlled shooting. No technical errors to correct."
They all looked at each other, uncertain.
— "Today, the lesson is about trust. And about what it means to be alongside someone in a patrol car. Or at a door. Or in a decision that will change a life."
He took a step forward.
— "Many of you still treat the concept of 'partner' as a function. As a pair of eyes that covers your back. But that's not enough on the street. Out there, you need to know who's by your side. You need to trust them. You need to understand who the person is who will decide with you whether someone lives or dies. Whether you live or die."
The silence deepened. Everyone was now paying attention not only with their eyes, but with their bodies. Lucy Chen shifted in her chair. Jackson leaned forward. Nolan crossed his arms, already sensing that something special was coming.
Derek continued:
— "So, today, the class is different. Today... you're going to get to know me."
Some eyes widened. Suppressed smiles appeared here and there.
— "You can ask me anything you want. Yes. Anything. As long as it has to do with what it's like to be a police officer, an operator, a partner. But with a warning:" — he raised his hand. — "Some things are confidential. There are operations I can't comment on. Names I can't say. And if I refuse to answer, it's not personal. It's legal."
— "Understood?"
A chorus of "Yes, sir" went through the room.
Derek pulled up a chair and sat down in front of them. He crossed his arms. He took a deep breath.
— "Begin."
First question – Jackson West
He raised his hand almost hesitantly.
— "Sir, what was the most difficult moment you've ever experienced in service?"
Derek didn't answer immediately. He thought.
— "It was in a village in Helmand, 2010. My team and I found an abandoned house with signs of recent enemy presence. In the back room... there was a child. Alone. She must have been about five years old. She didn't speak. She was in a state of shock. She had gunpowder in her hair."
The silence was absolute.
— "I never found out her name. But I've kept her face in my memory to this day. Because at that moment, I realized that not every mission ends with a 'you did the right thing'. Sometimes, you just... do the best you can."
Second question – Lucy Chen
— "Do you still feel fear?"
Derek smiled slightly.
— "Every day. But fear isn't weakness. Fear is what keeps us alive. The difference is in who controls whom. If your fear controls you, you freeze. If you control the fear... you decide."
Lucy took notes. Jackson did too. Nolan watched, absorbed. Third question – Recruit Jenkins
— "Have you ever killed someone in a situation where you later regretted it?"
Some eyes turned, tense.
Derek looked directly at the recruit.
— "I've never fired in anger. Nor carelessly. There was always a threat. There was always a real risk. But regret...?"
He looked at the floor for a second.
— "Regret is complicated. I don't regret being alive. But I sometimes wonder if I could have done things differently. And that doubt... stays with me."
John Nolan then asked:
— "Why did you choose to be a police officer after everything? After having served at the highest level of the armed forces?"
Derek looked directly at Nolan. The question was legitimate. And profound.
— "Because war taught me to survive. But the city teaches me to live with what I've learned."
— "And because... I saw so much destroyed. I wanted to try to build something."
Fourth question – Unknown Recruit
— "Have you ever cried while on duty?"
The room fell silent.
Derek didn't hesitate.
— "Yes."
— "I cried when a woman held me by the shoulders after we rescued her son who had been stabbed. I cried in the car. Alone. Because that day, he didn't survive."
— "I cried after the mission in Abbottabad. Because everyone was celebrating, but I only thought about the children who were in that house."
— "And I cried in the military court. Because I thought my honor was should have died. But my team... they wouldn't let me."
Lucy Chen, in a soft, almost hesitant voice:
— "What keeps you going?"
— "My partner. My friends. My father. My sister. And the conviction that if I don't get up... maybe no one else will get up in my place."
He took a deep breath.
— "And you. Every recruit who leaves the academy without making the same mistake I made one day... helps me keep going."
Some of their eyes were teary. Lucy discreetly looked away. Jackson was breathing more slowly. Nolan crossed his legs and watched as if he were learning not only about policing, but about humanity.
Derek then stood up.
— "The street won't ask if you're ready. The city won't care about your age, your background, your color, your grade in the academy. It will only demand that you be present. Aware. And whole."
— "Get to know your partner. Really. Know what they've lost. What they've already done. What they can't stand. Because in the end, the only thing between you and the irreversible mistake... is trust."
— "And now, you know who is teaching you. Who will be watching your back. Who has already made mistakes. And who wants you to succeed."
He paused briefly. The room was still silent.
— "Today's lesson... ends here."
But none of the recruits stood up. Not a single one.
Derek nodded. And then, without a word, he picked up his cap and left.
The silence remained.
But the lesson would echo for a very, very long time.
Chapter 39 – What Remains After the Silence
March 27, 2018 – 12:03 PM
LAPD Academy – Recruit Area
The midday sun strongly illuminated the academy's inner courtyard, reflecting off the metal benches and the rough concrete floor. The activity was slower than usual. Even the instructors seemed a little calmer, as if respecting a kind of collective pause after that morning's class.
It was as if something had changed in the air.
John Nolan, Lucy Chen, and Jackson West were sitting together under the shade of a wooden structure with a canvas roof. In front of them were plastic cups of water, half-eaten energy bars, and closed notebooks. None of the three seemed hungry. Or in a hurry.
Jackson stared at the ground, his elbows resting on his knees.
Lucy held her cell phone in her hands, not using it. Just looking at the blank screen.
Nolan, as usual, maintained an upright posture, his hands clasped between his legs. But his face, always calm and centered, was now burdened with something deeper. Respect. Reflection. Perhaps even... weight.
It was Jackson who broke the silence:
— "That... was the most intense thing I've ever experienced in here."
Lucy nodded without taking her eyes off the dark screen of her cell phone.
— "It wasn't a class. It was a kind of public confession... without self-pity. He didn't ask for anything. He just... opened up."
— "And even so, he still seemed stronger than everyone else combined," Nolan said, in a low voice.
Jackson sighed.
— "When he talked about the child in Helmand... I just... imagined myself in that situation. And I realized that maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't even have been able to go into that house."
— "The way he speaks, the silence between the words... it seems like every sentence of his has gone through a war before being spoken," Lucy murmured. Nolan nodded, his eyes fixed on the concrete wall across the courtyard.
— "He has a kind of leadership that can't be taught. It's like everything he does has a purpose, even when he just stops and looks at you."
Jackson smiled slightly, without humor.
— "That look... man, when he looked at Jenkins after the question of 'have you ever regretted killing someone?', I swore he was going to explode. But no. He answered with more humanity than any ethics class we've ever had."
Lucy let out a nervous laugh.
— "And Jenkins almost cried. He was really moved. We tease him, but today... everyone was moved."
There was a brief silence between the three.
Then Nolan spoke:
— "He didn't tell everything. And he didn't need to. But just what he showed... was more than anyone would have the courage to share."
Jackson leaned back against the bench, crossing his arms.
— "This changes everything, doesn't it? The way we see this profession. The way we're going to react when we're in the middle of the shit."
Lucy turned to him, her gaze serious.
— "For me, it changed. I already saw this career as a calling, but now... I see it as a burden. A burden that needs to be carried with awareness."
Nolan slowly got up and began to walk slowly around the courtyard, as if he needed to put his thoughts in order while moving.
— "Do you know what struck me the most?"
The two looked at him.
— "It was when he said: 'I don't regret being alive. But I sometimes wonder if I could have done things differently.' That hit me like a punch."
— "Because he didn't say it with guilt," Lucy added. — "He said it with honesty. And that requires a kind of courage... rare." Jackson was silent for a while, then murmured:
— "When I came here, I thought being a police officer was about knowing how to shoot, run, and arrest. Today I understood that it's also about carrying silence, memories, pain. And even so... putting the uniform back on the next day."
Nolan sat down again. The atmosphere between the three was heavy, but there was something there that wasn't negative. It was as if that lesson had planted something. A deeper sense of duty. An anchor.
Lucy crossed her arms over her chest.
— "We're going to remember this lesson for the rest of our lives, aren't we?"
— "I hope I remember," Nolan replied. — "Because it will be precisely in the worst moments that his words will come back."
Jackson chuckled softly, almost embarrassed.
— "And to think that at the beginning I thought he was just... a closed-off ex-Seal, you know? Almost cold."
Lucy looked at him with a smile.
— "He is reserved. But he's not cold. He just doesn't waste words."
Nolan added, with a half-smile:
— "And now that he's spoken... there's no way to forget."
2:45 PM – LAPD Academy – Instructors' Corridor
While the recruits were discussing in the courtyard, in the administrative building, Director Burnett walked purposefully down the corridors. He stopped in front of the instructors' break room and found Derek sitting alone, drinking black coffee. No tablet, no reports.
Just him.
Burnett entered and leaned against the doorframe.
— "I watched a good part of your class today. From behind the glass."
Derek looked up.
— "I noticed."
Burnett smiled.
— "You created something we didn't have here before: the idea that vulnerability can also be part of a police officer's training."
Derek remained silent for a few seconds.
— "They need to understand what comes after the patrol. After the shooting. After the mistake. If we only teach tactics, we're creating robots."
— "But you... you're helping to create prepared human beings."
Burnett straightened up.
— "I wanted you to consider something. More permanent. Not just as an occasional instructor. But as part of the continuous training. We can talk to your captain about it later."
Derek nodded, without making a promise.
— "We'll see. I'm still a man of the streets."
Burnett smiled.
— "And that's exactly why you make a difference here."
6:13 PM – Angela's Apartment
That evening, Derek arrived at Angela Lopez's apartment. She was already in lighter clothes, her hair tied in a makeshift bun, and a beer in her hand.
— "You made some noise today," she said, even before he closed the door.
Derek took off his jacket and approached her.
— "It wasn't intentional."
— "But it was necessary."
He sat down next to her on the sofa.
Angela rested her head on his shoulder, her fingers intertwined with his.
— "You taught them more than any class they'll ever have. Because you didn't give a lecture. You gave... you."
Derek was silent for a moment, then replied:
— "Do you think it was too much?"
Angela turned to him, serious.
— "It was honest. And the world needs honesty."
He kissed her on the forehead.
And at that moment, he knew that his mission continued. Not just as a police officer. Not just as an instructor. But as someone who, even with scars, chose, every day, to be part of the change.
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